... in response to end and beginning........, posted by Mark H on May 13, 2002

he has just stirred up the biggest 'Ant's Nest' since the Pre Troll days ! He is laughing all the way to work soon !! Do any of you really believe, knowing MarkH, after all his committment to the last three years or so of Night/Day/ Study/Tutoring +++, he is going to go out and take up this piece of second hand 'Trollop', who has no MORAL MEASURING CONSCIENCE in life, and date her? Only a FOOL with his education would do that. Get a grip you Blokes, he just 'sucked' you all in. He has no more intentions of getting serious with her than flying to the Moon.

However, what he does have to gain could be some of the most incredible and fascinating experience, of seeing first hand, how these women work & think. I look forward to hearing of any adventure (hopefully excluding temptations) MarkH might share with us, which could further enlighten this Board.

I say this, trusting MarkH knows where he stands in relationship with his Creator, after all, I was young and rebellious once too, I know what he is going to be tempted with. Just handle it "Dude"(to use Mark's favourite expression) and share it with us !!
Good Luck, Best Wishes in the Profession & Good Fun !
JohnL

P.S. Hey Mark, who won the 18 with Arnie?

... in response to Re: MarkH is Laughing .. ALL the way ......, posted by Mark H on May 16, 2002

"She needs me for nothing. I need her for nothing. I plan to learn alot.!"

There are three parts to this sentence and with the first part of the sentence you simply do not know at this point if that "She needs me for nothing" is true. Don't assume my freind - thats all.

... in response to end and beginning........, posted by Mark H on May 13, 2002

Mark you once knew me as greg or greg123.

Mark, who knows what is going on here. From my experience, you are a very nice guy. Nice guys as a rule are more prone to being trusting - even when they think they are experienced enough to be worldly enough to not be concerned about such. This is my only concern here. Trusting is a good trait but a trait that has its vulnerability issues. I know, I am of the trusting sort and have some wounds to prove it although from my posts in the past it may not be so obvious that this is my nature.

I do not remember you mentioning this lady before but there are no tieing references to the past in your post. However, subsequent to her, you did make other trips to the FSU - so even though you say that you did not have time in your life to bring someone over - evidently something kept you returning.

Now that your program is through, I would suspect that the arena of options has changed and that some restraints are now gone and you can look at all of this somewhat differently. And now that you are finally freed from the shackles of your program bingo here this lady pops up from the past.  

I had two reactions to your post - one my optimistic positive side envisioning that she never ever got over you and brought your address with her just in case she ran into problems with this guy. The other reaction was the realistic pragmatic side that thought something is fishy about all of this.

The truth will surface for you if you keep your wits about you. It is my opinion that you need to have both sides working full time -that being your skeptical side and the other being the trusting side.

However, with all that said it would be my advice that with this lady, IMHO, you need to view as a scammer or one with an agenda until proven otherwise. If you are interested in her, you need to pick up right off where you ended it, all the while being a second clandestin person behind it all who is the guy who is going to find the truth and not trust what she tells you. I personally think this is the best way to have her reveal the truth - not by questioning her right away but by being the person that she feels she can trust, that she can rely upon because if she is a woman who simply got in a bad situation and she is really the right woman for you, that will be exactly what you will continue to be for her until the day you walk down the isle with her if that end result is meant to be.

If the lady has agendas that are priority and thus her USA husband was merely a ticket, she is not going tell you any different and in fact will continue the program with someone else if they are needed. And thus, she could have an agenda with you also but is giving you information or lack of information to throw you off or not allow you to see this.

There are so many things that are or could be yellow flags here of which a few are if one takes the skeptical side approach:

An honest sincere lady would not marry a man that she does not feel that she is in love with. And, any woman who thinks she is truly in love will forget about prior men as she has found the one. She should not have brought your address to contact you or anyone else. She came prepared.

She left the guy so soon? I mean they did not try marriage counseling or anything?

He bought her a vehicle which would give her freedom yet denied her classes? This sounds conflicting.

If the guy is that much of a loser, how come she did not pick up on any of this before? Possible sure but, I do not know.

How could you be part of the agenda? === She is not sure if the charges will hold and needs an ace up her sleeve if things get tight. She needs a man to step in and marry her if it looks like deportation time is around the corner. She may be just being smart by hedging all her bets.

She told you all the good things to corroborate her story and got her friend to back her up about him being weird and how she gave back the vehicle and does not want any money. Yes sounds good, something you would want to hear. Is it true? I am telling you that you do not really know this. Her husband does for sure. But, will you get reliable information out of him and how will you get it?

Just be careful. I for one really would like to hear how this all unfolds. I wish you luck.

... in response to end and beginning........, posted by Mark H on May 13, 2002

I may be from the backwoods but I at least have some common sense.  

But when she takes you for a ride, well, you'll know just about everyone said "lookout".

... in response to end and beginning........, posted by Mark H on May 13, 2002

Hey Mark,

I just saw an article in USA today that said that Nurse Anaesthesiologists are in high demand right now, and are namingf their price, all over the country...

Looks like you graduated just at the right time!

... in response to end and beginning........, posted by Mark H on May 13, 2002

That he called her and didn't give us these facts.
Now you have left out, where she is living now (city)?
And how far away she is from you.

But of course, your going to date her... Is it going to be a long distance romance? A state or two away? That's great, your in there!

Where is she working at?

If she's that fine looking in short dress, you can bet she'll be dating more than just you. Which is cool. I'm all for her establishing ties here in the states and getting with the local customs.
--
Maybe I am wacked on the kind of woman that I am looking for. That I want a good motherly lady to take care of ME. I want my lady to have her own business at home raising our kids, as well. (prior to me, meeting any woman I do look at her current job skills, I don't want to marry a woman that is a accountant or a rocket scientist, where she could be making more money in Russia/Ukr. and living a decent life over there, I don't want her to have to lower her standards for me, only to be unhappy and think the what-if-I stayed home mental game. The girl that I get will, not be going backwards in life, but always forwards in her economical well being.

If it means, marrying a country girl with no college or university education. So be it. I am realistic to my surroundings and opportunites.

I'm looking for someone with a background that is similar to mine. No doubt, I pass over alot of women. But ya just gotta have some sort of bearing on what you think will work out in the long run than just picking anyone off the street or internet mail order bride site.
---

You didn't tell the size of the town she came from in Alabama. I know in the big cities you can wear short sexy dresses, but out her in the rural areas. The lady will be deemed something less than honorable, if she wears something too sexy all the time. I'm not against her where something sexy at home or nice occasions out. But, if she knows she's the hottest looking girl in the county. Why fan the flames and get more attention than warranted. I will adress this to her, but not take her clothes away. (Ya got to admit, most guys will try and talk it out before something drastic of that magnitude would have had to take place). If she speaks english and can write it, she has a pretty good education where she rationalize with the other person. (I do know about a guy on this message board who is a rancher and would have to tell his wife to put on jeans to come out of the house and give him a hand doing something in the barn. Dress are great don't get me wrong, but if you live in the country she really needs to know when to wear jeans and when not to... She complied with his wishes).

It's really how comfortable you would be with the gossip factor, if you lived where I lived and the type of people that I live amongst (a bunch of two faced a%%&#$@#!). Or, if you lived in a big city, well your just another face in the crowd.

... in response to end and beginning........, posted by Mark H on May 13, 2002

is so little bonafide info.  One can guess and suppose and come to either conclusion...but the conclusion is based on insufficent data.  Its just not there.  Is like a rorsarch ink blot test...what does one see from an undefined and undileniated glop.  All we see is who we each are,   with our own opinions...right or wrong.  Then again she will be moving on ( in due time ) to husband # 3.  Not such a great track record.