It rips my heart out.

[Cecil]

... in response to Getting gun shy!, posted by Don J on Aug 15, 2001

Hi Don,

I had always heard poster speak about the crowing rooster in the Phils.  When I began writing to ladies there, I had to laugh becoz it seemed as if there was always a rooster crowing in the background and it didn't seem to matter whether it was in the provinces or the larger cities.  I still have to laugh whenever I hear the rooster on Mag-Anak.  Take Care!!

Cecil

[kevin]

... in response to Re: Getting gun shy!, posted by Cecil on Aug 15, 2001

Hey, I'm sure my condo by-laws prohibit posession of farm animals.  But sometimes I get paranoid that a neighbor will fink on me.  The sounds of roosters and ducks happen almost every day at some time.

- Kevin

[Dave H2O]

... in response to Re: Re: Getting gun shy!, posted by kevin on Aug 15, 2001

Hi Kev,

I love the word "fink"! I haven't heard it in years...since I moved south. Watch out for the friggin' fire fighter next door. He might "fink" on you for clucking and quacking. If he does...buy an elephant! ;o))

Dave H.

[Howard]

... in response to Getting gun shy!, posted by Don J on Aug 15, 2001

n/t

[Carl]

... in response to It rips my heart out., posted by kevin on Aug 15, 2001

Kevin
It is possible that Analyn has learned an important lesson from this and if she does not give you up easily, then just maybe she does love you. If she is only after money, she will go elsewhere soon. Otherwise, she will not give up very soon.
As Timex says, you will have to take it to a higher level like meeting her in person to know more. There are ups and downs in love, but the truth comes out in due time. You have a big guard up now and rightfully so, but do not let it keep you away from possible real love.
God be with you
Carl

[Howard]

... in response to It rips my heart out., posted by kevin on Aug 15, 2001

Kev,

I think it's obvious that I am no authority on Filipinas, but I can offer this to a friend.  You must proceed in whatever manner you feel comfortable with.  If there are warning signs that make you uncomfortable, address them.  If you don't get answers that make you feel better about the situation, move on.

You are absolutely right, there are so many complications that may arise even in a situation that seems perfect, trust me I know, that it makes no sense to proceed with one that you have so much doubt with.  You know what it takes.  You  have got to be 100% certain that you are making the right choice, or you will never be able to put forth the necessary effort to get through the rough spots.

Not to make this into a "Me" thing, but that's what keeps me going.  I know that I chose the right one.  I know that Ayesa is the one for me, I just need to find a way to make her realize that and break through the language/cultural barrier.  If I wasn't so sure that I made the right decision, I don't know that I'd have the resolve to continue fighting.

Of course, my hope for you is that when you find the right one, your battle will be over.  Less like me and more like the rest of the guys around here :c)

Keep the Faith, bro!

H

[timex]

... in response to It rips my heart out., posted by kevin on Aug 15, 2001

Kevin, there is no way of knowing one way or another without meeting her in person, and even then you may not know for sure. I don't think there is 'absolute certainty' in love... who knows whether your new friends will be more sincere or less.

In my opinion (and I know some will disagree), e-mailing more often than not is just a game or pastime. At some sage you have to take the relationship to a 'real level', until then it's nothing but speculation.

[DonaVictorina]

... in response to It rips my heart out., posted by kevin on Aug 15, 2001

Kevin,

It's good you are using your judgement very well.  I don't tolerate such kind of Filipinas --- playing games with you guys, or soliciting money or gifts from you  --- because it simply destroys the good ones.  Helen should have been more honest to ZEb.  Besides, their current economic difficulty, if ever,  is neither a reason nor an excuse for such kind of attitude towards you guys.  

More luck to you next time...Keep looking.

Dona Victorina

[outwest77]

... in response to It rips my heart out., posted by kevin on Aug 15, 2001

you are longer lasting than me, any references to money
and i tend to run for the hills , although i have to take
their financial situation to heart and be understanding,
its a tough call but go with your gut not your eyes.

[kevin]

... in response to Re: It rips my heart out., posted by outwest77 on Aug 15, 2001

I think I dismessed past, subtle innuendos simply because of poverty.  But any such reference made to the tune of "I can't force you to give if it doesn't come from your heart" made me realize that what the pessimistic side of me was imagining was indeed true.  I think that's alot of crap that the willingness to arbritrarily buy and give away expensive gadgets to relatives has anything to do with the goodness of my heart.  I beleive I was being put on a guilt trip because of my reluctance to fulfill such a demand.

- Kevin

[the Mog]

... in response to Re: Re: It rips my heart out., posted by kevin on Aug 15, 2001

Kevin, I understand what you are feeling, but I guess I wouldnt really call a cell phone an expensive gadget. Its their life over there, how they stay in touch with everyone.
Remember the median salary over there is something like $1800 a year. If you buy her bro a cell phone and it doesnt work out you are out a hundred or two bucks. Thats about what two weekends at the bars in Downtown Minneapolis would cost you, and you more than likely wouldnt even get a phone number.
Keep an open mind.

[YourDreamWife]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: It rips my heart out., posted by the Mog on Aug 15, 2001

KEVIN ~ Effective communication is sometimes difficult when you are within eyesight and touch of the other person. Add the complicators of distance, media, and third parties and you have the makings of a communication disaster... I would caution you to stay on the high side of any misunderstanding. True, you must listen to your own feelings, but do not let them add to the problems you will continue to have with various levels of communication... I would not recommend springing for the cellphone, but I would urge you to give your girl second and third chances to prove her sincerity... As Westerners, we are recognized as having far more wealth than Third World people. It is natural for your girl to look at you that way... MALCOLM

[greg]

... in response to It rips my heart out., posted by kevin on Aug 15, 2001

Happy to hear You thinking with Your big head. I'm sure that your doing the right thang. It takes Luck or a blessing from God to find a gooood, honest and faithful Woman.  greg

[Dave H2O]

... in response to Re: It rips my heart out.-Kelvin, posted by greg on Aug 15, 2001

Greg,

Has any progress been made with your mahal's situation? How is Junior doing?

Dave H.

[greg]

... in response to Hey Greg..., posted by Dave H2O on Aug 15, 2001

Our Son's doing great, he's drawing alot of attention from AWs hehehehehe. AWs say that I am a good man becuz I take good care of our Son. Everywhere we go..AWs stop us to comment how handsome and friendly he is. He starts his childcare development hopefully next October after passing age one. About his Mama? I decided to follow the board's advice and let her do what she wants..She's undecided at this present time whom to hire to handle her Annulment. I told her to chose the Lawyer carefully becuz I wasn't going to pay for a second time. It's amazing how clever and good my Son is compared to many other children his 11 months, I feel very much blessed to have him in my life. In RP, the Filipinos are daily making life for his Mother unbearable becuz she permitted him to follow me to America without herself. They are even cussing at her...She's more active in her Church, and it's helping her to deal with the departure of her Son. We spend our time communicating on MSN messenger, instead of wasting thousand of dollars on phone calls. Dave, I look forward to your Mahal finally arriving here to be with You. I hope God blesses You both. )) greg