I could use some advice on my CC contacts...

[chew79]

Hi, I'm new to posting here, but I've "lurked" now for a couple of months and found a lot of information VERY helpful here.

Anyway, I have a trip planned to Colombia.  The primary reason for this is that I'm learning Spanish and I want to immerse myself to make it easier.  But I'm also open to meeting someone while I'm there.  Ideally, I'd like to meet my potential future wife, but if all I find is new friends and fun out of it, I'm fine with that too.

So I've been on Colombian Cupid, and have made contact with many women on there.  I plan on being in Bogota and Medellin while I am there.  I screened for everything I'm looking for, and so far I've had some sort of reciprocal contact with 24 women from Bogota, and 29 from Medellin.

I'm still a novice at this, and don't really know what are the red flags about someone I should avoid are.  I can't imagine I'd have the time (or energy) to see them all, so I'd like to cut down the potentials. 

I was wondering if I sent links to profiles if someone could tell me ones to avoid, and also which look sincere.  Thanks for any help anyone can give me.  I've found that most everyone here is happy to help a new guy like myself, so I'd appreciate a little guidance.

[bcc_1_2]

Hi, I'm new to posting here, but I've "lurked" now for a couple of months and found a lot of information VERY helpful here.

Anyway, I have a trip planned to Colombia.  The primary reason for this is that I'm learning Spanish and I want to immerse myself to make it easier.  But I'm also open to meeting someone while I'm there.  Ideally, I'd like to meet my potential future wife, but if all I find is new friends and fun out of it, I'm fine with that too.

So I've been on Colombian Cupid, and have made contact with many women on there.  I plan on being in Bogota and Medellin while I am there.  I screened for everything I'm looking for, and so far I've had some sort of reciprocal contact with 24 women from Bogota, and 29 from Medellin.

I'm still a novice at this, and don't really know what are the red flags about someone I should avoid are.  I can't imagine I'd have the time (or energy) to see them all, so I'd like to cut down the potentials. 

I was wondering if I sent links to profiles if someone could tell me ones to avoid, and also which look sincere.  Thanks for any help anyone can give me.  I've found that most everyone here is happy to help a new guy like myself, so I'd appreciate a little guidance.

Don't cut down your list... add to it. All these girls are going to want to meet on peak times, so it is especially good if you can run through that list and get some women to meet you on off peak times.


For a variety of reasons (some due to legit conflicts, others due to flakiness) you will have issues getting together with girls (wait til you see the traffic in Bogota). My suggestion in the evenings is to cover their taxi fare (it's cheap). During the day they are stuck using public transport.


Just keep adding to your list and don't feel like you are obligated to go way above and beyond to meet someone... you flew to colombia... so they can come across town and fit themselves into your schedule... if not oh well, don't feel bad. But seriously... add another 20 to that list and then jump on a plane.

[chew79]

Don't cut down your list... add to it. All these girls are going to want to meet on peak times, so it is especially good if you can run through that list and get some women to meet you on off peak times.


For a variety of reasons (some due to legit conflicts, others due to flakiness) you will have issues getting together with girls (wait til you see the traffic in Bogota). My suggestion in the evenings is to cover their taxi fare (it's cheap). During the day they are stuck using public transport.


Just keep adding to your list and don't feel like you are obligated to go way above and beyond to meet someone... you flew to colombia... so they can come across town and fit themselves into your schedule... if not oh well, don't feel bad. But seriously... add another 20 to that list and then jump on a plane.

Yes, I did forget to factor in the flake factor.  So I think you're right, just meet as many as I can.  Thanks for your input, I appreciate it.

[bcc_1_2]

Yes, I did forget to factor in the flake factor.  So I think you're right, just meet as many as I can.  Thanks for your input, I appreciate it.

Pick a place right next to your hotel to meet. Ask them to text you when they arrive (at say a coffee shop). Then when you get that text walk from your hotel lobby (where you most certainly should have wifi) and meet them. You don't want to be dicking around in the middle of nowhere waiting on girls all day. If she wont come to you (especially if you are paying for it all) just move on.

[fathertime]

i 2nd what bcc said regarding the list of ladies....if anything add to it....lots of ladies could easily flake on you....you will meet the ones you can and hopefully most of your top prospects.   HOw long are you going to be in each city?  It should be a great fun adventure for you.  How far along is your Spanish?  How old are you?  Where are you from?


Fathertime! 

[chew79]

i 2nd what bcc said regarding the list of ladies....if anything add to it....lots of ladies could easily flake on you....you will meet the ones you can and hopefully most of your top prospects.   HOw long are you going to be in each city?  It should be a great fun adventure for you.  How far along is your Spanish?  How old are you?  Where are you from?


Fathertime!

I'm planning on 3 weeks in each place.  I work remotely, so all I need is a laptop and internet for work.  So luckily this allows for flexibility with travel time for me.  This is my third attempt at Spanish.  I did fairly well my previous attempts, but not having someplace to use it led to not retaining much at all.  I'm hoping having no other choice but to interact with others will solidify it in my brain, lol.  But I'd say right now I'm better than beginner, but not quite intermediate.  I'm 35 years old, and I live in the Denver area.

[chew79]

I was hoping out of the 54 women I was interested in, that I could parlay that into meeting at least 10 of them in person (hopefully more).  I don't have a problem covering their taxi at all.  It sounds like I'm already ahead of the game just making the trip down, so I'm optimistic.  But I will definitely keep looking for other prospects.  Thanks for your advice.

[Awesome]

Well as far as red flags, be weary of any women who dress to sexy in their pictures, or have pictures taken in some slum looking neighborhood.  Some of her homies might want to come "make friends" with you too.  In general stick to girls who are currently employed or are going to school.




Bcc, how do you manage all of these meetups?  I mean do you set a time limit of how long each meeting lasts?  Did you ever have 2 or 3 show up at the same time?

[chew79]

Well as far as red flags, be weary of any women who dress to sexy in their pictures, or have pictures taken in some slum looking neighborhood.  Some of her homies might want to come "make friends" with you too.  In general stick to girls who are currently employed or are going to school.




Bcc, how do you manage all of these meetups?  I mean do you set a time limit of how long each meeting lasts?  Did you ever have 2 or 3 show up at the same time?

That sounds sensible.  Most of the ladies I've been talking to are more the cute girl next door types than the bombshell look.  And I actually filtered by education on the profile search.  And I did pay attention to employment status as well.  So unless they're being less than honest on their profiles, I feel good about most of them in that regard.

I also put more weight on the profiles that had "real life" photos on them as opposed to modeling pictures.  Seems that would most likely be someone real and sincere.  But maybe I'm wrong, I'm just assuming.

How I would time manage these meetings remains to be seen.  I guess it depends how many flake on me or not.  I would have mostly free time while I'm there, so I figure I can fit in at least one per day.  Hopefully repeats if the chemistry is right with someone.  I guess I will figure that out once I get there. 

Also, I'm heading in mid  April until early June.  How is the weather that time of year?  I looked up the climate, and it seems temperature wise at least, it seems pretty consistent year round, with Medellin being a little warmer than Bogota.  Does it rain more at certain times of the year than others?

[Awesome]

I guess I will figure that out once I get there. 

This is basically what it comes down to.  Guys have all these "plans" about lining up a bunch of dates or meetups, but as soon as the right chemistry hits you with a cutiepie all of those "interviews" and "plans" go right out the window.  One thing I can guarantee you is you'll have a great time no matter how it all shakes out.


Where do you plan on staying?  Furnished apartment, hotel, homestay?  I highly recommend staying at least a few days in a youth hostel.  It's the perfect setting for socializing and hanging with other tourists, especially hot chicks.  The only problem with that is in a hostel you'll probably meet fellow north americans or europeans who probably won't be able to help you practice your spanish much.


The best way to practice spanish is to hang out with someone who knows no english, therefore you'll be forced to practice your spanish.  Your spanish school or a youth hostel will know of "language exchange" meetups at bars where colombians go to practice english and foreigners look to practice spanish.  Of course these meetups are a great setting to make friends with nice pretty girls.

[bcc_1_2]

Well as far as red flags, be weary of any women who dress to sexy in their pictures, or have pictures taken in some slum looking neighborhood.  Some of her homies might want to come "make friends" with you too.  In general stick to girls who are currently employed or are going to school.




Bcc, how do you manage all of these meetups?  I mean do you set a time limit of how long each meeting lasts?  Did you ever have 2 or 3 show up at the same time?

Yes and Yes. Obviously it helps to have a friend running interference at the hotel while you are a couple doors down at the coffee shop. I would be honest and say you just have time for coffee and then have a "tour" to go on that your hotel signed you up for.

[chew79]

Where do you plan on staying?  Furnished apartment, hotel, homestay?  I highly recommend staying at least a few days in a youth hostel.  It's the perfect setting for socializing and hanging with other tourists, especially hot chicks.  The only problem with that is in a hostel you'll probably meet fellow north americans or europeans who probably won't be able to help you practice your spanish much.

I'm actually renting a furnished apartment in each city that I found on VRBO.

I'm pretty much going down for a specific purpose.  Well two... To improve my Spanish and find a potential wife.  The youth hostel sounds like it would be a blast for the right person.  But I'm not that youthful anymore, and I think I would like to interact with native Spanish speakers mostly.

[bcc_1_2]

I'm actually renting a furnished apartment in each city that I found on VRBO.

I'm pretty much going down for a specific purpose.  Well two... To improve my Spanish and find a potential wife.  The youth hostel sounds like it would be a blast for the right person.  But I'm not that youthful anymore, and I think I would like to interact with native Spanish speakers mostly.

Some girls have a negative view of the gringos that stay in the hostels in and around La Candelaria. Hell, so do I.

[littlebhuddha]

Don't red flag a lady just because she dresses sexy. Colombian women generally speaking take their sexually very seriously and take great pride in displaying it. Actually I think it is a latina thing. What I would take note of is how they pose. These ladies aren't tramps and they won't act like tramps. If they do, run! Good luck.

[fathertime]

I'm planning on 3 weeks in each place.  I work remotely, so all I need is a laptop and internet for work.  So luckily this allows for flexibility with travel time for me.  This is my third attempt at Spanish.  I did fairly well my previous attempts, but not having someplace to use it led to not retaining much at all.  I'm hoping having no other choice but to interact with others will solidify it in my brain, lol.  But I'd say right now I'm better than beginner, but not quite intermediate.  I'm 35 years old, and I live in the Denver area.

Hey Chew, you are at a very good age and overall position.  The prior attempts at Spanish will help you with the foundation so it is excellent you made those earlier efforts.  After this 6 week trip you might find that you want to live there on a more permanent basis since you can work remotely.  When I was chasing the ladies, I would have LOVED to have been able to live in Colombia part of the year, but I had too many commitments here at home base. 


Fathertime!   

[utopiacowboy]

I'm planning on 3 weeks in each place.  I work remotely, so all I need is a laptop and internet for work.  So luckily this allows for flexibility with travel time for me.  This is my third attempt at Spanish.  I did fairly well my previous attempts, but not having someplace to use it led to not retaining much at all.  I'm hoping having no other choice but to interact with others will solidify it in my brain, lol.  But I'd say right now I'm better than beginner, but not quite intermediate.  I'm 35 years old, and I live in the Denver area.

If you live in Denver, there is Spanish language radio and television. I agree that any attempts to learn a language wither and die with lack of use.  Are you listening to Spanish radio and watching Spanish television? If you are religiously inclined there are also services in Spanish at many churches. A side benefit is there are a lot of single babes at the services and opportunities to meet them.

[Calipro]

Yes, I did forget to factor in the flake factor.  So I think you're right, just meet as many as I can.  Thanks for your input, I appreciate it.

The only way I ever found to reduce the flake factor on Colombian Cupid was to get them on Skype.
The ones that are going to take the time to chat with you on Skype more than once are the ones that are 10 times more likely to show up.  It reduces the anxiety of meeting for the first time to almost nil...if you have had a number of Skype conversations.

[bcc_1_2]

The only way I ever found to reduce the flake factor on Colombian Cupid was to get them on Skype.
The ones that are going to take the time to chat with you on Skype more than once are the ones that are 10 times more likely to show up.  It reduces the anxiety of meeting for the first time to almost nil...if you have had a number of Skype conversations.

Yes that helps. But beyond that you also have to factor that many of these women are busy (work, school, bogota traffic, etc). They all want to meet at the exact same time.

[chew79]

Hey Chew, you are at a very good age and overall position.  The prior attempts at Spanish will help you with the foundation so it is excellent you made those earlier efforts.  After this 6 week trip you might find that you want to live there on a more permanent basis since you can work remotely.  When I was chasing the ladies, I would have LOVED to have been able to live in Colombia part of the year, but I had too many commitments here at home base. 


Fathertime!   

If I met the right person, I'd love to live there.  Ideally (though ideals never quite work out like you'd wish), I would want to have primary home in the US, and second home in Colombia.  That's only because I have a lot of family and friends here I'd like to stay close to at least half the time.

[chew79]

If you live in Denver, there is Spanish language radio and television. I agree that any attempts to learn a language wither and die with lack of use.  Are you listening to Spanish radio and watching Spanish television? If you are religiously inclined there are also services in Spanish at many churches. A side benefit is there are a lot of single babes at the services and opportunities to meet them.

As obvious as it sounds, I've never thought to watch or listen to Spanish speaking media here.  Thanks for bringing that to my attention, lol.  I'm not much of a believer myself, but I'm open minded to others religious beliefs.  If I met someone that was into God, then that's not a deal breaker for me.  I'm not against checking out the church hotties though, lol.

[chew79]

The only way I ever found to reduce the flake factor on Colombian Cupid was to get them on Skype.
The ones that are going to take the time to chat with you on Skype more than once are the ones that are 10 times more likely to show up.  It reduces the anxiety of meeting for the first time to almost nil...if you have had a number of Skype conversations.

Yes.  This is great advice.  Actually have already had Skype meetings with 4 ladies from CC.  Luckily all of them knew some English, though not fluently.  I did my best to speak Spanish, but it was nice having that crutch when I needed it.  I'm planning on meeting them in person once in country (as well as more Skype meetings in the mean time). They all seem real sweet and sincere. If these ladies are indicative of what Colombia has to offer, then I think I'm going to be VERY happy down there.

[Elexpatriado]

Avoid the girls who dress too sexy, are obviously artificailly enhaced,  and say they are intrested in guys 30 to 80 (or maybe even 60) , make those stupid peace signs, have tatoos, or maybe even the ones with too many "kissy" poses (though this last one is a little less critical).


Sounds like you have  agood game plan.Lots of upfront work on Skype. Also you get a chance to feel them out befoere hand.


Sounds ike a lot of work though. Have fun.

[JamesDonut]

Welcome to the forum.  It's a good thing that you are doing your homework before blindly heading down there.  Believe me it will come in very handy once you get to Colombia.  It's an awesome experience that can be very disorienting at the same time.

If you live in Denver, there is Spanish language radio and television. I agree that any attempts to learn a language wither and die with lack of use.  Are you listening to Spanish radio and watching Spanish television? If you are religiously inclined there are also services in Spanish at many churches. A side benefit is there are a lot of single babes at the services and opportunities to meet them.

I'll go one step further.  With the internet you can watch and listen to Colombian Spanish 24/7.  This will help a lot more than listening to the Spanglish on local Radio and TV.  Training your ear to understand the Colombian accent would be a big step in the right direction. 

Keep learning and practicing your Spanish.  It will be key in helping you identify red flags.  And help you communicate efficiently.   Also, Take a different approach in studying this time around.  Everyone learns at their own pace and own style.  If this is what you want, you can have it.  But you have to work to get it. 

[JamesDonut]

Also, I'm heading in mid  April until early June.  How is the weather that time of year?  I looked up the climate, and it seems temperature wise at least, it seems pretty consistent year round, with Medellin being a little warmer than Bogota.  Does it rain more at certain times of the year than others?

https://weatherspark.com/averages/33556/Bogota-Bogota-Colombia
https://weatherspark.com/averages/33584/Medellin-Rionegro-Antioquia-Colombia

[Gato4Astrid]

Avoid the girls who dress too sexy, are obviously artificailly enhaced,  and say they are intrested in guys 30 to 80 (or maybe even 60) , make those stupid peace signs, have tatoos, or maybe even the ones with too many "kissy" poses (though this last one is a little less critical).


Sounds like you have  a good game plan.Lots of upfront work on Skype. Also you get a chance to feel them out befoere hand.


Sounds ike a lot of work though. Have fun.

Tell me about it.  I hate these stupid peace signs too!  Too childish!


Like you, I also avoid "20-80" age range.  Obviously non-serious searchers!  Also avoid these who wrote "I hate games"  "I hate lairs"


Even worse when comes to Dominician Republic girls.  Most of them always wrote like "20-80" age!