Here I go....

[Bob_S]

Very true! I spent the first 4 years of my marriage signalling my wife to come over to me with my palm up, using my index finger or all of my fingers. A VERY BIG NO NO in  the Philippines!  Always palm down moving the fingers up and down like waving bye bye.

Same thing in Japan.  Palm up is how you call a dog, palm down is how to call a human.  Opposite of how we do it here.  Don't get them mixed up!

[william3rd]

Hey Jeff,

Very true! I spent the first 4 years of my marriage signalling my wife to come over to me with my palm up, using my index finger or all of my fingers. A VERY BIG NO NO in  the Philippines!  Always palm down moving the fingers up and down like waving bye bye.

Dave

Thailand is a wave- just like being on a rose parade float-just not as plastic. . .

[Bear]

My wife says she has no idea what you're talking about with the hand gestures?  Its no big deal to her nor has she ever heard that was to anyone else?  Still maybe its the area of the R.P. you're in?  She did say thou about the "flip" comment would cause a fight with most of the males.

The Bear Family

[Ray]

The gesture that Dave H referred to is not only considered rude throughout the Philippines, and Japan as Bob mentioned, but throughout most of Asia as well.

See Culture Shock Philipiines! page 16...

Ray

[thekfc]

The gesture that Dave H referred to is not only considered rude throughout the Philippines, and Japan as Bob mentioned, but throughout most of Asia as well.

See Culture Shock Philipiines! page 16...

Ray

Hi Ray,
which one of the books are you talking about?
I see that there are 2 different Cultural Shock: Philippines - both by the same authors.

I have the one with the guy & lady on the cover but on page 16.....they are talking about "Age of Trade & Contacts" & "Chinese Legacy" - giving an overview & history of the Philippines.

[Ray]

Yeah, I have an old edition, revised in 1994.

The part I was referring to was in a chapter titled Understanding Filipinos, under Talking Arms and Hands

Ray

[Freddie_May]

I think this thread needs an update..

Its over, guys..

I ended it a week ago.



Freddie

[Jeff S]

Well, Freddie, it is always best to end things when you're confident they're headed the wrong way rather than letting them drag on unresolved. Best wishes to you and hope you hang around here. Your input is welcome.

- Jeff

[piglett]

Well, Freddie, it is always best to end things when you're confident they're headed the wrong way rather than letting them drag on unresolved. Best wishes to you and hope you hang around here. Your input is welcome.

- Jeff

DITTO

[Freddie_May]

Thank you, Guys..


Freddie

[piglett]

Freddie

I think after a period of time has passed you should concider looking for another guy.
You sound like a nice lady & therefore you should have a nice man to spend the rest of your life with.
years from now your parents will be gone & if you have brothers or sisters they will probably be busy with their own lives. This may sound harsh but.........you will still be all alone, is that what you really want for a life?
there are many many fish in the sea, so you mite want to go back & see if you can catch another one.
Your a nice looking lady,so i don't see how you would have much of a problem with this task.
maybe the the next guy is not rite for you either, but maybe he turns out to be perfect for you.
You will not know if you never try.


If you were my little sister this is the advice that i would give you.
good luck
piglett
 

[jm21-2]

It can be a tough call to make to end a relationship, but sometimes it's better. Best wishes in the future and you're more than welcome here.

[bcc_1_2]

It can be a tough call to make to end a relationship, but sometimes it's better. Best wishes in the future and you're more than welcome here.

I agree even a short one can be tough. JM, are you now speaking from recent experience?

[Freddie_May]

Thank you for the supports, guys.

I will consider that, Piglett.
After avoiding marriage 3 times, I am starting to think that maybe I have a committment issue.
We will all be alone someday at some point. I am alone, away from my family. But is the fear of being alone, a good enough reason to marry someone?
Maybe someday I will meet someone who I can't live without.

But for  now I am alone and I am not sad about it.

Freddie

[jm21-2]

I agree even a short one can be tough. JM, are you now speaking from recent experience?

Fairly recent. A bit over a month ago.

[Bear]

Thank you for the supports, guys.

I will consider that, Piglett.
After avoiding marriage 3 times, I am starting to think that maybe I have a committment issue.
We will all be alone someday at some point. I am alone, away from my family. But is the fear of being alone, a good enough reason to marry someone?
Maybe someday I will meet someone who I can't live without.

But for  now I am alone and I am not sad about it.

Freddie

Excuse me for being so personal...

From my opinion all things are an "attitude".  If you are "determined to" then you will.  No matter what, no matter where, there will always be positives and negatives, both exist and always will.  You can focus on the negative or the positive, as you choose but then review where it is putting you in life and how happy you are about whats occurring.  I once hated the world and everything in it because no matter how hard I tried or how many times I tried, I failed.  I considered myself "the definition of Murphy's Law" and I was.  One day I was wasting my life thinking about the current situations and decided it was enough.  I sat down and planned, as I had many times before, how to turn this mess around but this time I got an attitude about it, decided to forgive all the past situations and start again (involved a lot of prayer).  Soon I noticed small successes, more and ever growing.  Within a few months I was changing things in a major way to what I had hoped it would be when I was younger.  I have to thank my late grandfather for that because he pointed out that it was my anger at my failings (as well as those who were involved and how I had not forgiven) them that was holding me back. 

Now I'm remarried, with 3 children, in a highly acknowledge position at a very secure job.  Do I have problems - you betcha'.  I just deal with them as I can and go on.  If I try, I can remember the old problems, but I've honestly forgot most of them, I choose not too remember.  Forgiveness really works.

You want to fix your situation then the reality is that it's all a decision, an attitude (followed/or preceded by a prayer).  Nothing happens unless you want it too.

The Bear Family

[Bob_S]

But is the fear of being alone, a good enough reason to marry someone?

No!  It often leads to hasty bad choices.  Take your time and do it right.