Trip Report -- Russia in November The Ending

[Ryan]

[This message has been edited by Ryan]

I had a wonderful time in Togliatti Russia; I had no problems in this city at all.  On the second to last day I told my girlfriend that I wanted to learn how to cook borsch as I often cook the soup of the day at my family’s restaurant on Saturdays.  Sense my family has been cooking at this restaurant most all my life I am pretty handy in the kitchen.  I started making a list of the things that I would need at the market.  I love going to the market as I got quite a kick out of it when I was in the Ukraine and knew that this market would be no different.  As suspected meet way hanging out in the open and it was a dirt floor for the most part.  It just cracks me up, as we are so worried about germs here in the states.  Anyway I purchased some pork that looked good then found some beef with the bone in it so I could make my Borsch broth.  I went to get vegetable and my girlfriend said that she has all the rest at home.  I told her no I want to buy these things I don’t want to use you families food etc.  It is so hard not to flirt with the women in these markets some a so cute and they get all giddy when they know you’re an American.  Don’t worry I am a gentleman I don’t look at other women when I am with my girlfriend well I don’t make it obvious anyway.  Some of the girls would ask my girlfriend in Russian if I was an American and she would give a quick and sarcastic “Da” and turn grab my arm and we would walk…  Anyway to sum it up Togliatti has many nice women for anyone that is searching.  So we get to my girlfriends home and her mother is home for lunch.  I sit at the table and unpack the groceries.  Her mother get up and heats up some food for me and makes me eat.  Everyone is always fussing over me making sure I have something to drink or eat.  If I wanted some wine or beer just everything all the time, it cool.  Just to let you know I never drank any Vodka when I was in Russia.  I just didn’t feel like it and no one else was drinking it.  When I was in the Ukraine I was shooting down Vodka like no tomorrow.   So we cooked the borsch and I wrote down every detail, we had an enjoyable after noon.  I whipped up a couple dishes with the left over pork beef, and vegetables and my girlfriend just loved it.  I made enough for the family to have when they got home that evening, they loved it also.

It was time to go home we traveled by train from Togliatti to Moscow.  I planned it this way so that my girlfriend and I would have some time together alone and to see some of the countryside out the window.  I also just love to travel by train in that country.  Her father took us to the train station.  We shook hands again and he told me that I was welcome to come back anytime.  This made my girlfriend very happy.  As we were waiting for the train policemen were walking around asking different people for their passports.  I never got asked they always walk past me, I joked with my girlfriend saying I wish just once they would just ask me I feel left out.  When we were getting on the train a woman was standing taking tickets.  She stops my girlfriend and asks for her passport my girlfriend turns to me and said we need to show out passports.  The woman taking the tickets said no I just need yours.  I was like come on here!  No really I was quiet and just got on the train it was just really funny and my girlfriend and I joked about it all the time.  The train ride was cool in the morning my girlfriend started her crying again saying that she didn’t want this to end I just held her and told her I would be with her gain soon.  This has been happening for days now and it was starting to make me a little sad also.  I was strong and tried to listen and would remember KenC giving me a hard time about me crying when I was in the Ukraine.  I was cool, I maintained but it was not easy.  When we got off the train we had a man waiting for us to take us all around the city of Moscow as my flight was not until 4:45 that evening.  Then man walked up to us wearing Detroit Red Wings jacket.  I started laughing as I am from Detroit area and love the Wings.  I took this as a good sign and I was right.  We had a great time traveling around the city seeing everything.  WWII memorials, Red Square Lenin’s Tomb (Spelling on Lenin sorry) it was the creepiest thing to see Lenin laying in that glass case with guards all around.   We could not take any cameras into Red Square at this time because of this tomb being open.  I’ll never forget that part of the trip seeing that tomb.  We went to over look the city at this one spot by Moscow University; we must have seen 20 wedding parties during our time at this spot.  They were all drinking Champaign and Vodka toasting each other and celebrating their wedding.  There are so many beautiful women getting married in this city.  Well that was about it, oh yes almost forgot.  I did get asked for my Visa and passport when I was standing outside of Red Square.  Everything was in order.. We went to the airport I claimed nothing except the money that I had left over and we said our goodbyes. That as you might imagine it didn't go well it was a real tearjerker.   She promised that she would always love me and so on etc.  I promised that I would be back as soon as I could.  We have since written to each other two letters a day all of them taking about how much we loved and missed each other.  She has sent me some picture that she took and I also have sent her some that I had developed.  If you would like to see a couple pictures E-mail me at my address and I will send you them we really are a cute couple.

[micha1]

... in response to Trip Report --  Russia in November The E..., posted by Ryan on Nov 27, 2002

quite a trip you had, hoping many others can  be lucky enough to have the same.

[BubbaGump]

... in response to Re: Trip Report --  Russia in November T..., posted by micha1 on Nov 27, 2002

You haven't been posting in a long time.  Hope you're not freezing up in Montreal.

[micha1]

... in response to Welcome back Micha1, posted by BubbaGump on Nov 28, 2002

Well, today,  thursday morning, 8 am,  it is minus 12 celcius, 7 or 8 degree F.  My dogs were sitting in the snow,
while I was taking the garbage out, along with the
recycling stuff.
Was reading the posting, one in a while, but did much traveling, because even if  one is retired,  the hobbies(volutary work) have to be taking care of.
While at auctions in N.J", KY and Penna, while speaking
with american friends, found them pretty worry and dejected
about the political situation, all over and the security
situation in the US.
Also, shall post soon, about a trip to Finland to meet a
Russian girl and on another trip to meet a Slovak girl
in Paris.
For my good buddy,  LP,  been thinking very hard about the
Seychelle,   going right after the Holidays.
Now that you are an islander, you  will understand me.
Got to go to the farm, now.  thanks.

[BubbaGump]

... in response to Re: Welcome back Micha1, posted by micha1 on Nov 28, 2002

If you are staying in Helsinki take a city bus tour.  It's not great but still it's interesting.  I stayed one night at the Intercontinental Hotel which is very nice but expensive.  The restaurant there was very memorable with some of the best food I've ever had.  That was also expensive but you might want to go there for a nice meal.  The city is very clean and you'll like walking around.  They have some kind of church there which was on the city tour that was carved out of rock.  It was 4 years ago so I don't remember it very well. Enjoy the trip.

[LP]

... in response to Re: Welcome back Micha1, posted by micha1 on Nov 28, 2002

...How ya be? Thats a nice spread you have out there, I envy you. I've been hearing a lot about Montreal lately as a friend of mine has fallen for a R/W who lives there. In fact, she's coming out to spend Christmas with him so I'll get to meet her soon. It's a sweet deal when they can come to the States. (No way he was gonna go to Montreal with your current WX.)

No problems with security here, now I get to shoot PAX who hassle me. ;-)

Seycelles, eh? You dog, have a good time. Btw, in case you haven't heard: "No man is an islander" ;-)

[LP]

... in response to Trip Report --  Russia in November The E..., posted by Ryan on Nov 27, 2002

....Don't screw it up now, your future success may well depend on how you handle the difficult part. It won't be easy to avoid the temptation of banging out a K1 but thats what you should do. You've waited this long, whats a little more time in exchange for the brass ring?

Build on this, make another trip in a few months. If you do cave and file the docs, at least make another trip during the processing. (A trip for the interview doesn't count) Listen to KenC, time spent together is the key. Time spent when the stormy clouds of emotion have dissipated and the destination is in clear view. Fly blindly in those clouds and you could soon be upside down and in a smokin hole.

The best relations are like the true monuments they represent. They need to be planned, constructed with the best methods and materials, then forever lovingly maintained. Do none of this, or build them in haste, and they soon crumble with age.

Good luck....

[AronM II]

... in response to Nice...., posted by LP on Nov 27, 2002

Being patient is HARD when your heart is telling you "she's the one!".

The first time, I met and fell head over heels with a RW and immediately filed the k1.  Before it was approved I went back for another visit and things were...different.   She hadn't changed(I still think she's a great lady).  I hadn't changed.  We just saw each other in a different light...A light that wasn't clouded by romance and anticipation of a dream.  That relationship died quietly.

The second time I/we did it right (3 more trips) and my Bulgarian wife and I couldn't be happier.  My advice, and do with it what you will, be patient.  Go back at least one more time and see if it's the same.  I'm a firm believer in the idea that sometimes you just have to roll the dice and take your chances, but you gotta minimize your risk first.   YOUR  risk and HERS.

[Ryan]

... in response to Re: Nice...., posted by AronM II on Nov 27, 2002

First you write letters to someone that you feel your connecting with.  You cannot let that get you too involved as you have not met her yet.  Then you meet her and things are great but you still cannot let that rule your thinking and heart.  Now I have to wait for another time and I have to make it as soon as possible.  This search really sucks if you ask me why am I doing this...  Ok, Ok I understand I will calm down and take the steps.  I will try and make a quick trip over after the new year.  Thanks everyone....

[KenC]

... in response to Your right this is hard..., posted by Ryan on Nov 27, 2002

Ryan,
Use this time to get to know her.  Ask every question you want and then some more.  Discuss EVERYTHING : child rearing, how to and how many, working mom or stay at home mom, religon, money (spending & saving), faithfulness, what is acceptable in a relationship and what is not, lifestyles, city or country, future career goals of each other, extended family interaction, educate her on life in MI, learn about life in her city, sex (present, past and future), send her the list that was posted here about the difference in finances here vs there, ect ect.  Do this in a very non-promising way, but in a way that you get to know her inside and out (and her you).  This time is very valuable because it aint a fantasy no mo, it is very real.  You have a lot of homework ahead of you, use your time wisely.
KenC

[Richard]

... in response to Re: Nice...., posted by AronM II on Nov 27, 2002

I had problems with my first woman from the FSU.  It happened on the second visit.  I wish I had gone back after 3 months and 6 months instead of 6 months and 12 months.  Of course, with 20/20 hindsight it's easy to second guess yourself. May is 6 months off ... (I really hope this works for you,  but I do like LP's suggestion of another visit in a few months.)

[Stan]

... in response to Re: Nice...., posted by AronM II on Nov 27, 2002

Exactly the same thing happened to me with my first FSU "Hottie" from Mariupol. I sure was glad I went back w/ fresh eyes and saw what was going on. Was very "bummed" then but it was the best thing that could have happened in the long haul.

[Jack]

... in response to Re: Nice...., posted by AronM II on Nov 27, 2002

Nice post Aaron.