Attachment Blues

[utopiacowboy]

... in response to Not so fast Seeker....., posted by Calipro on Oct 26, 2004

I think you're right, Calipro - I sensed that in his letter to her. Guys may scoff at your Rule No. 1 but when you think about it, it makes sense. Most women will not sleep with a guy without a certain level of committment on their part. This is not true for guys but it is certainly true for most women.

[soltero]

... in response to Attachment Blues, posted by Seeker on Oct 26, 2004

Put her out there when you are ready...It's not like Cali is the size of Texas. We should have a list of scammers like that. It is no telling how many of us might be writing to the same girls. I feel so very sorry that you had to find out like this, but count your blessings that you didn't find any emails or love letters after you had gone through the process of marrying her and bringing her here and having a stranger in your house. I hate to get all "CSI" on you, but if you copied that directly, her side with no punctuation and the all caps shows a serious lack of education, and it has been my experience that the more uneducated (and poor) the senorita, the more prone she is to working an angle. Gordo may just be one of many.

[Seeker]

... in response to Re: Attachment Blues, posted by soltero on Oct 26, 2004

I'm certainly counting my blessings for having found out sooner, rather than later.

I did forward her last e-mail to me, to her boyfriend last night. I basically told him how I had gotten the attachment containing their love e-mails. I wished them good luck and told him to be careful with this girl. He hasn't written back.

[soltero]

... in response to I forwarded her e-mail to me to her boyf..., posted by Seeker on Oct 26, 2004

Good for you. Exposure is the best way to end this kind of emotional betrayal. I don't know their situation (hers or his), whether he is playing her or she is playing him, or if any of it is real, but for your part, I am sure that it was real for you. Whether he writes back or not, she has been exposed and hopefully, she will think twice before doing this again. On the downside, she may just get better at hiding it, but at least this person has given you the way out to find someone who will be what you need her to be. Don't give up on finding happiness because it is out there. I am still looking after a betrayal and it only strengthens my resolve and gives me the experience that I will need to find the right one.

[Hoda]

... in response to Re: Attachment Blues, posted by soltero on Oct 26, 2004


Don't be so quick to open fire on women, because of their financial status or lack there of. The history of crime has repeated itself over & over again. The "Best" crooks, are the "Rich" crooks....lol

[soltero]

... in response to Easy Detective.....lol, posted by Hoda on Oct 26, 2004

...I still say that there needs to be a list of people on both sides who are truly caught in the act with verification posted. Cucarachas tend to scatter when the lights come on and it would make it much easier to find the good ones when the scammers know that it won't be that easy to get over on someone honestly trying to make a real connection.

[soltero]

... in response to Easy Detective.....lol, posted by Hoda on Oct 26, 2004

I agree with you on that, the rich crooks are better at it, but their thievery is of a different breed. From what I have found is in SA, there are a lot of good women, and the middle class and above seem to look at stuff like that with distaste. Any one with character would. Not all poor people are of low character but poverty has a way of making those with weaker characters go in directions that they might not have chosen otherwise. I have had less than anybody and more than most at varying points in my life and I have seen many things good, bad and amazing. Political correctness is for those who are comfortable and insulated from reality. I have no problem saying that many poor people will chew through your back pocket to get to your wallet and not care if they break the skin while they are doing it. Caveat Emptor applies to relationships as well.

[kented]

... in response to Attachment Blues, posted by Seeker on Oct 26, 2004

The good news is that this was the cheapest way to find out the sad facts.  Where in the world does "Gordo" live that they can't be together?  Maybe in the US and you were their ticket to get together.  

Everybody who does this needs to understand that since we are going to improve women's lives, there is always the danger that they will exagerate their feelings for us, or lie outright, just to get to the US.  

After my divorce, I became much more suspicious and even paranoid about the honesty of the women I dated.  If you are as pissed at her as I was at my ex-wife, I suggest you play with her.  Don't tell her what you know just yet and ask her questions in E-mails to which you already know the answers.  Let her lie for a while and then tell her you had a dream about someone named Gordo.  

Good luck.  Just be thankful you didn't pay for her visa, get her here and then need to go through a divorce and a year of hell.  Everyday it feels a little better.

[YEP]

... in response to Attachment Blues, posted by Seeker on Oct 26, 2004

http://www.latinlovescams.com/

[doombug]

... in response to Attachment Blues, posted by Seeker on Oct 26, 2004

[This message has been edited by doombug]

Sorry about your situation.

Thank you for sharing it, though.  This should be a permanent feature of this website--it is an excellent lesson in being extremely cautious with foreign novias.  It'll probably make a lot of us open our eyes a little wider.

Best of luck in resolving this.

[zack]

... in response to Attachment Blues, posted by Seeker on Oct 26, 2004

Gosh Seeker, I'm sorry to hear that. Keep your chin up and don't give up in this endeavor. You will find the right woman. Everyone does who is persistant and doesn't give up.

"Be careful out there and proceed with caution." The best advice to give to someone about these trips. Hang in there.

Zack

[papi]

... in response to Attachment Blues, posted by Seeker on Oct 26, 2004

i am tired and did not translate all the spanish in my head but this does not sound good assuming it is a RECENT LETTER!! if so, sorry man - join the club. the process is not as easy as people seem to think. i have had lots of relationships but for one reason or another cant pull it together either. in Colombia, i would guess somewhere around 25-30% of the woman in agencies are truly not sincere and have ulterior motives. it is a big filtering process and then you have to then make sure the stars line up, chemistry and all when you find one you like, etc.

[buster40]

... in response to Attachment Blues, posted by Seeker on Oct 26, 2004

What a bust!

[david hagar]

... in response to Attachment Blues, posted by Seeker on Oct 26, 2004

what does the e-mail say in English?

Beattledog

[Seeker]

... in response to Re: Attachment Blues, posted by david hagar on Oct 26, 2004

Gordo you don’t know how much I love you. You are a marvelous person. You mean everything to me. My Love, the only thing I ask is that you never forget me because I will never forget you because you were the first man in my life and you will continue to be so. I love you and I hope all of your projects and desires that you have in mind become reality come what may. My Love the only thing I can tell you is that you can count on my unconditional support because I consider you, even though we don’t have wedding bands, my husband, my couple even though the rest of the world may be opposed and my Love what makes me even more happy is that you believe in my love and I am very certain of yours. I love you with all of my heart.
Your sweetheart, XXXXXXXX  XXXXXXXXX                        

Hi Chiquita:
My Love the truth is that I never come to imagine that you love me so much as you say you do in this message, believe me that I’m a little shocked because this is for me a small breath of happinesssssssss….s I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH.  
Nena I have a very big dream which is to be able to be with you, and although I know it is somewhat difficult for the both of us, it is only a matter of time and this is why I want you to try to understand me very much. Precious, I appreciate you giving me this breath of support.  
You are to me a very large treasure and never XXXXXX, would I want to lose you because believe me that I would suffer very much with the simple thought that I’m realizing a dream without the person that I have most loved in all of my life, and with the person that I want to be with for the rest of my life.
XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXX