Rich gringos do not have it made in Colombia

[bogota vet]

[This message has been edited by bogota vet]

Tough to find your soulmate , when you make her sign a pre-nup!!!!!

" I love you so much , I open my heart to you, I dedicate my life to you"  Now please sign this paper, whats mine is mine, whats yours is yours.   (So much for your soulmate , it will always be in the back of her mind , ALWAYS THE PAPER SHE SIGNED , ALWAYS!!!!!)

rational by gringo:  But she will understand, it is very logical concept.

[DallasSteve2]

... in response to Rich gringos do not have it made in Colo..., posted by bogota vet on Nov 16, 2002

I had a prenup with my "Bogota wife from hell".  It saved a lot of grief when she decided to divorce me.  My fiancee from Cali has also agreed to a prenup.  She has children.  I have children.  What does that have to do with a prenup?

Patrick wrote that he believes the income during the marriage should be divided 50/50.  That's sweet, but I don't agree.

Let's assume for a minute that I have 4 children and my wife has 2 (from previous marriages).  Let's assume that the parents are basically a conduit for wealth to the children.  Let's assume that I can and do make a lot of money and she can't.

If we later divorce, or maybe I die (that happens, too), is it fair that the children of some other man each receive 25% of the wealth I made and each of my children recieve 12.5% of that wealth?  Am I being a good father if I don't protect that income with a prenup?

My prenups say that what's mine is mine, what's hers is hers, and that applies to all income after marriage as well.  If she stays with me she will be well taken care of, and her children, too, but that does not equal 50%, IMHO.

Steve

[JBond]

... in response to I love to debate prenups, posted by DallasSteve2 on Nov 18, 2002

Dallassteve: I have the same type of preup, that her income is her's and my income is mine durring and after the marriage. So if she sits on her ass durring the marriage and dose not want to work, I am not going to support her after the marriage ends or split anything I made durring the marriage.

[Patrick]

... in response to Re: I love to debate prenups, posted by JBond on Nov 18, 2002

"I am not going to support her after the marriage ends"

The three lawyer's I spoke with about prenups in California circa 1995 all told me that a prenuptial agreement can not cover alimony in California.  Are you saying that your's does?

[JBond]

... in response to Hmmmmm,, posted by Patrick on Nov 19, 2002

Yes, You have set up seperate accounts for each of you and keep all your money and assets sperates names. The only thing that you can not put in a prenup is child suport, that is govern by law and you can not do anything about it. Also: any women has the right to wave alimony before the marriage or after the marriage. She has to wave it in wrghting.

[Pete E]

... in response to Re: I love to debate prenups, posted by JBond on Nov 18, 2002

If you live in a community property state like California where I do earned income and appreciation of assets is considered "community property" of both spouses.There might be a way to exclude certain catagories of this even here,but its not so easy or even enforceable perhaps.Its one thing to draw up and sign a pre nup,another to have a court consider it valid.
But of course the answer is see an attorney.But beware,he will be getting paid hourly while you possibly loose the case.(Sorry,we,I mean you,loose)

Pete

[JBond]

... in response to Rich gringos do not have it made in Colo..., posted by bogota vet on Nov 16, 2002

If the women you are going to marry cames here to the US because she LOVES you she will sign. If she came to get into the pockets of a rich gringo you should not even marry her.
First of all forgive my spelling! THANKS!!

I am on my 2nd. marrge to a Colombia women. The first one I met in Bogota and she tuned into the wife from HELL. Now I am marred to a wonderfull women from Cali. And I never had it so good. The first week I met my new wife I told her that would never get marred agan with out a pre-nup. And it was fine with her, she said she was not marrying me for my money.

Long story Short: I went To Bogota found a women that I thought was my dream girl, she came here and changed into the wife from hell. We were marred 3 mounths and the relationship by the time it ended cost me about $25,000. It cost her not a dime.

If you go to another country to marry; most likey the women don't have any money. You the Gringo are paying for everything from day one. Depinding on the womens skills, you still are paying for everything, any where from 6 months to five years if she wants to go to college. Also most of the time you will be sending money home to the famely, untill she starts working.

I am 43 years old and putting away money for my eary retirement at 55. and I make over 100k a year. My wife is 25 years old and wants go to college after she learns english. That fine with me I will pay for everything. Lets say in 5 years she no longer wants to be marred, she is now 30 years old, college educated, in her prime, And I paid for her schooling, new car, new life and it has cost me about $75,000 to $ 100,000. not counting food clouthing exc. and it did not cost her a dime! Now five years later I am 48 years old out of my prime, 7 years short of my planed retirement. But now she also wants half of everything I made and put away durring our marrge, after everything I gave her plus alamoney. I will be making about five or 7 times her salary. With out a pre-nup she gets HALF and alamoney for five more years. Now she's not getting marred agan because she dose not want the chacks to stop, so she moves in with a new boy friend and they spend my retirement money together... Do you think being in my right mind I will not have a pre-nup.

I live in west Los Angeles and pre-nuts are common place here, a pre-nut is a contract, just as a marrege is. Any contract can be taken to court to be broken, But don't let it scare you from having one. Know your rights because 50% of marreges fail. Most lawyers have no experice with pre-nups and they are scare of them also, if they wriht a bad one, you can turn around and sue them for malpritice that the law.

[corv]

... in response to Re: Rich gringos do not have it made in ..., posted by JBond on Nov 17, 2002

JUST KIDDING... I also spell like shhhit.

[Pete E]

... in response to Spend some of that 100k+ salary on spell..., posted by corv on Nov 18, 2002

I can spell better than I do posting.Being a hunt and peck typist,looking at the keyes not the screen,I make alot of errors.Doesn't mean I don't know better.Same for others I presume.

Pete

[bogota vet]

... in response to Re: Rich gringos do not have it made in ..., posted by JBond on Nov 17, 2002

I am glad you able to rationalize it in your mind, if it makes you feel better.
But there is always that piece of paper she signed in the back of her mind.

If a man really finds the right girl , prenups are not necessary.

I guess after year or two, you could always tear up the pre-nup.

For me no pre-nup, there is something special about a soulmate relationship, similar to young couples starting out at 20.

I also have the advantage of traveling quite frequently to Colombia, I know  a lot of girls, I am also a good judge of character.

(anyway my net worth is negative !!!, she may make me sign a pre-nup so she isn't burdened with debt.)

[Patrick]

... in response to Rich gringos do not have it made in Colo..., posted by bogota vet on Nov 16, 2002

I find it strange that so many guys go for pre-nups after having discussed the situation with three lawyers myself before getting married.  When I checked with the lawyers in California six years ago, I was told that what was mine before the marriage would be mine after it, and that anything earned during the marriage would be half owned by us both.  I was also told that a pre-nup can't protect you from alimony.  I was advised to document what I had going into the marriage and keep post marriage money and investments separate. The only thing a pre-nup could have done for me was to protect the money earned during the marriage, which I felt should rightfully be haf her's anyway.

If someone owns a house and is worried, they should get an appraisal before the wedding, document the amount owed on the mortgage, and keep any other assets separate after marriage.  I've always thought that trying to keep what you earn during the marriage for yourself was selfish and the mark of someone who thinks they're marrying someone they shouldn't be marrying.  Two bad omens for success IMHO.

If you own, or are part owner of a business, or want to leave some or all of your assets to family or friends when you die, then I was told a pre-nup is a good idea.

Everyone should consult with a lawyer in their own state before marrying a woman regardless of where she comes from.  I think if more men did, there'd be much less talk about pre-nups and much less confusion over what they can, and can not do.  There's no way to marry someone without some risk.  Making a good decision and taking your time is your best defense.

There was a guy on the Russian board a year or two ago who claimed to have a pre-nup that required his wife to pay him in the event the marriage failed and she did not return to Russia.  Unless there's a state with some very male sided rules, an agreement like that is going to be laughed at by a judge.  Per-nups can be challenged, and if they are found to be too one-sided, they are sometimes thrown out by the judge (A lawyer in California told me that).

[Pete E]

... in response to Re: Rich gringos do not have it made in ..., posted by Patrick on Nov 16, 2002

Patrick,
Thats pretty much what I discovered when I talked to a lawyer and I was relieved that I didn't have to ask my wife to sign a pre nup.
I think for people with assests in certain catagories it might help though.A guy I know encouraged me to get one as he did before he married.This guy ownes several commercial buildings and basically he wanted to exclude that from community property.I think the legal rationale is that the property was owned before the marriage and will continue to increase in value and create income not because of any effort on his or his wifes part but because economically that will occur.It sounds similar to a home you live in but that can be construed to increase in value because you make payments on it from community funds.Funds in stock accounts might be treated in a similar manner to the commercial buildings.
Of course the disclamer is see your lawyer.You will probably find there is little value in a pre nup.

Pete