Problem with these women...

[Throw]

I have read many of your stories of all these horrible girls from SA particularily Cali.  I am a long time visitor to Cali with a fiance in Cali.  I know "jo's martimorny scam" story about his wife Venassa Garcia. I know Vanessa Garcia.  I have met her parents and family. Let me say that it took balls to post that story.  It is important to note that he left some key parts of the story out.  Without going into details he had many BIG warning signs well before he married this thief.  He choose to ignore those blatant signs and proceed anyway.

I am somewhat familiar with H2O's story as well.  He as well had some warning signs with Johanna.  For those of you who have been following the story, that is the reason he went to the apartment, without her knowlege, to check and make sure all was as it should be.  As we now know, things were not what they should have been.

The reason for this thread is not to discourage men from going and finding their dream girl.  Women are women no matter where you go. There are some good and bad.  In any relationship there speed bumps. Granted no one should be cheating or stealing.  There are some great girls in Cali and SA.  You need to be willingly to put the time, effort and work in to finding them but they truly exist.  I do not of any other place where a man who is in his 30's, 40's, 50's, 60's,  can find a real keeper.  Someone who is not loaded with baggage but have the attitude and looks that a man needs to make him feel like a man.  Listen guys, we have found the secret fishing hole.  It is LOADED with fish.  But you must proceed with common sense.

JO & H2O have been brave enough to share their stories.  They are telling us things to be on the look out for.  WARNING SIGNS!!!  This does not mean that all these girls have alterior motives.  There are some great women that want to meet you.  Do not be discouraged from some of these posts.  Go down there with your radar up, and your mind open.  Use common sense.  Consider this, many of these men who have been jaded, burnt etc by other SA women end up right back down there again to find the "right one" this time.  Why you ask.  Because they know that what you can find down there you cannot find here in the states.  Do not be discourage but be heads up.  My friend and cousin just married a great Cali girl so they do exist.  And she is here in the states as we speak.

[Richard Smith]

... in response to Problem with these women..., posted by Throw on Jun 19, 2001

These women are really psychopaths.  One of the attributes of a psychopath is that they are very cool and relaxed in their behavior towards their victim.  And the reason they are so cool and relaxed is they know that they will never get caught because the victims will be too embarrassed to do anything and just go away.  If one is victimized it is really your ethical duty to do something about it to keep this human vomit from victimizing others.  I think it would be useful to discuss the following options:

   1) publishing the woman's name and address,

   2) telling us where we can see her picture and avoid her,

   3) perhaps the best way would be to contact the INS to keep her from every getting a visa into the United States.

[El Diablo]

... in response to Re: Problem with these women..., posted by Richard Smith on Jun 19, 2001

Hi Richard,

Posting photos, addresses and extremely detailed personal information is a very bad idea in my mind. It could easily turn ugly with people putting ex-novia's information up as a vendetta for a relationship turned bad.  

While I have 100 percent confidence in JO's accusations because I have my own independent confirmation of it, in general I take accusations with a certain degree of skepticism.  There's always two sides to every story.

While I agree that there is a problem in Cali, I think the problem has been created more by us than by them.  Too many guys are very easy marks. A lot of guys are turning over their wallets to women they barely know.  Supply is creating its own demand.

Rather, if all of us would band together by trying not to give money directly to these girls until after the wedding, 90% of the scammers would just dissappear.  

I'm not holding my breath. (-:

El Diablo

[Richard Smith]

... in response to Re: Re: Problem with these women..., posted by El Diablo on Jun 19, 2001

My opinion is that any man that has been ripped off should publish this information.  After all, the purpose of this board is to help men pass useful information to each other.  Men can evaluate the truth of the statements and choose for themselves whether they want to avoid the scammer.  I am tired of seeing good men always ending up being the victims.

As for your comment about not giving any money before a long trial period and marriage, I fully agree.  And I would also include in that figure any engagement ring.  A man should not give a woman a $4000-5000 engagement ring.  If the relationship breaks up he is not likely to get it back.  Why not give a CUBIC ZARCONIUM ring instead for $500.  It looks the same and a real diamond ring.  I have heard of many men doing this.  If the relationship lasts and you finally get married you can, if you want, eventually replace it with a real diamond.  But, if the woman turns out to be a fraud you have the satisfaction of visualizing how she is going to look when she tries to cash in on the ring and finds out its not a real diamond.  Giving a valuable diamond ring to a woman in a foreign country you barely know is too much of a risk.  Give a CUBIC ZARCONIUM ring instead.

[DallasSteve]

... in response to Cubic Zarconium and other solutions, posted by Richard Smith on Jun 21, 2001

Excellent comment.  I went to Bogota in June, 1999.  I met several women and I proposed to one.  I even gave her a ring.  After a few weeks, she stopped returning my calls.  Here's the good news: the ring was 1-carat cubic zirconium.  $60 at WalMart.

Until your foreign bride/fiancee moves into your home, what you have is a dream.  If you want to put a multi-thousand dollar ring on her finger while she is still living in Colombia, I hope that you have a lot more money than I do.  

The happy ending is I took another CZ ring back to Bogota in October, 1999 and put it on the finger of the most charming, beautiful young woman I have ever met.  She knew it was not real and she married me anyway.  

Lest you think that I am cheap, or that I don't appreciate my wife, you should see the way she smiles when she pops the T-tops on her 2001 Firebird.  I'm sure it means a lot more to her than a piece of carbon.

Regardless of what DeBeers tells you in their advertisements, diamonds do not equal love.  Too many men have been indoctrinated in that tradition and are now thinking like the dreaded American Woman.

Steve

[SteveG]

... in response to News flash: Diamonds do not equal love!, posted by DallasSteve on Jun 21, 2001

Anddddddd if it's Black...and a 6 speed.  LOL   I have two older TA's and intend to get one of the newer ones as soon as they drop way down in price.   Trans Ams DO equal love.....or if not a Darned good substitute!  :0)
                                     SteveG

[DallasSteve]

... in response to Dang Steve - I woulda married ya if it's..., posted by SteveG on Jun 22, 2001

It's silver and it's not a TransAm.  It does have the ground effects, but to me the hood scoops are too big on the new TransAm.  Plus a TA costs an extra $5000 or so.  I wanted her to get a red one, but she likes silver.  And it looks good, too.

Meanwhile, if you're interested, I deal with the subject of love and money further in my response to Houndog below.  And, furthermore, if she only loves me for the money, my wife is worth every penny.  Reminds me of an AC/DC song.  "Come on, come on, love me for the money.  Come on, come on, listen to the money talk."

[Houndog]

... in response to News flash: Diamonds do not equal love!, posted by DallasSteve on Jun 21, 2001

...either....but if they bail...the Firebird would probably be easier to get back.

For some reason ? the buying of very expensive "stuff" has the *ring* of manipulation & control to me.

HD

[DallasSteve]

... in response to Re: News flash: 2001 Firebirds do not eq..., posted by Houndog on Jun 22, 2001

I agree with your point.  It does have the "ring" of manipulation and control.  However, I'm not sure who's manipulating who, if you get my drift.

Let's be real for a minute.  If you marry a woman without a prenup (I have one, by the way) and she makes substantially less money than you, is she marrying you for love or for "interes" as they say in Espanol?  If marriage is for love why do women expect us to share our incomes?  Why wouldn't they just trust us to take care of them, and vice versa?  Why would either party expect to gain money in exchange for their affection if their love is really pure?  I did not marry my wife with the hope that some day I would receive financial gain from her.  

I have a situation closer to that ideal, in my opinion.  I take care of my wife because I make much more money than her. Part of that is providing transportation for her.  The car, mind you, is in my name.  But if she can get approved to carry the note in her name I will gladly give her the title, the debt, and I will continue making the payments as long as she doesn't drive off into the sunset.

My original points were:

1 - I believe it's foolish to invest a lot of money in a foreign woman until she moves in with you.

2 - I think there are better uses for thousands of dollars than to make the DeBeers company richer.  If she likes the look of a diamond on her finger, why not CZ.  It looks just the same.  If I gave my wife $4000 and said "You can buy yourself a diamond ring or you can put it in your bank account."  she would put it in her bank account.  A wise decision by my estimation.

3 - Spending money on a woman does not prove that you love her.  Neither does it prove that you are buying her love.  If she needs something and you love her you will provide it for her, if you can, even if it costs money.

[Houndog]

... in response to This is not a perfect world, posted by DallasSteve on Jun 22, 2001

...which would bring us to the part of the discusion entailing "Motives"...if we were to carry it out further...but, I lack the time and inclination...however the rest of you feel free to continue without me.

HD

[Traveler]

... in response to Re: This is not a perfect world..yea I k..., posted by Houndog on Jun 22, 2001

motives for whom???   the men want to marry an attractive woman, the women want to leave Colombia.  whose motives are we talking about??  or do you still believe that Colombian women want foreign men because of el machismo???   seems to me that both partners are getting what they want and if it results in a partner that is compatible with  you then all the better.

other points:

seems to me the recent rash of posts regarding problems in relationships and scams can definitely be attributed to a lack of communication.  how's your Spanish coming??  it seems that the gringos are starting to become viewed as saps and becoming "targets" for opportunistic Colombians.  much of the uncertainty could be prevented by being better able to communicate.  your hormones and desperation are leading you to deception!!!!

what is wrong with buying your loved one an expensive gift??  sharing is part of the process.  but don't kid yourself Dog.   if you don't think that the women are joining these agencies for economic benefit then you are a bigger fool than you already are.  if a good relationship results fine, if not, well she's in the US and her opportunity has expanded.  they are doing this despite the "embarassment" of having to "sell" themselves.  it seems to me that women are making some pretty big decisions due to their situation, and not really socially accepted.  

[Houndog]

... in response to on motives, posted by Traveler on Jun 22, 2001

**seems to me the recent rash of posts regarding problems in relationships and scams can definitely be attributed to a lack of communication**

funny the guys that wrote the stories didn't mention that...maybe you should take that up with them...?

BTW: get a date yet.. in any language well, even a blind pig can find acorns...so what's your problem maybe you should ask the Warden for more time out of solitary??? I did hear a rumor you and goog were trying to get cell mate priviledges ...I vote he let you two share a cell...LOL

HD

[Traveler]

... in response to Re: Oh really now, posted by Houndog on Jun 22, 2001

is really sad.  you are not even the least bit humorous or witty when you try to be.  you are only hilarious when you "attempt" to post something serious.  

yes, Dog.  that was my own conclusion regarding communication.  maybe they didn't see it, maybe they disagree, but if you don't think there are women that don't take advantage of non-Spanish speaking gringos, then you are simply naive.

dog your Got a date thing is getting old.  I have lived in south florida for just two months and am dating two women.  I didn't even have to leave the country.  

try to post something substancial. if you disagree with my position, state your rebuttal.  enough with the insults.

[Houndog]

... in response to laughing at your own jokes, posted by Traveler on Jun 22, 2001

..yea I did make myself bust a good chuckle...of course the only thing funnier would be trying to take you seriously...LOL...you're a broken record...same near sighted singular thinking you came here with...same lame excuses for not moving forward with the rest of the guys here. Same I have two dates and that's just today story you've been pushing since we started asking you why you don't have a GF after a year on a "dating/relationship" board...

Honestly you stand out, along with one or two others as seeming to be missing something about the purpose of this forum. GIRLS....GIRLS....GIRLS....almost to a man with a few notable exceptions the rest of us talk about GIRLS....Finding Girls...Dating Girls...Wooing Girls...Marrying Girls...while you're stuck right were you came in....chasing your tail...going in circles...spinning your wheels....shouting malandros inconsequential, insignificant and mostly irrelivant truths...that are getting you nowhere....stuck in repitition mode.

Gotta go take my wife to a movie...

HD

[Traveler]

... in response to Re: laughing at your own jokes, posted by Houndog on Jun 22, 2001

tell me more about finding and dating girls.  I would love to learn from the master.