Please help me

[LP]

... in response to IMHO, posted by wizard on Nov 23, 2002

...Assuming this guy is legit (me smells a rat), he should take the hard line and do it now. How's about some details? How long did he know her? Another love at first sight deal? Did he marry her after one vist?

Frankly, assuming it's a legit story and turns out to be another whirlwind wonder marriage, it's tough to have any sympathy. When are some men gonna learn? (Is the drunken  man Ryan listening?) I see more and more horror stories like this every day, and not just with Russians. (Read the Latin and Asian boards)

At any rate, go for the throat *now* and don't stop until she's been run into the ground. (lol, the infamous shallow grave should be sufficent.)

[KenC]

... in response to Please help me, posted by John LV on Nov 23, 2002

John,
First of all, see an attorney immediately.  See what you have to do to start the process of divorce.  I don't think it matters where you two got married, but where you reside is what counts for jurisdiction.  Second thing to do is change the locks on your home.  She can take anything she wants right now because of community property laws, unfortunately, including the car.  Now if you were to find the car, use the spare key to drive it off and store it in an unknown location, I don't think that is breaking any laws either.  If you have possession and the title is in YOUR name, I am sure that a sale would be OK too.

What is her status with the INS?  As you have been married for less than two years, the best she can be is a green card holder in the permanent "conditional" status.  That "condition" is being married to you.  As she has abandoned the home, she is no longer fulfilling her role as spouse to you.  Get on the phone to the INS and keep calling and talking to people until you get your answers.  Hope this helps.
KenC

[tim360z]

... in response to Please help me, posted by John LV on Nov 23, 2002

solid divorce/family credentials.  You could try to do this yourself,  but don't waste your time and money.  You have already wasted enuf...doing it your way.

[John F]

... in response to Please help me, posted by John LV on Nov 23, 2002

N/T

[John F]

... in response to Please help me, posted by John LV on Nov 23, 2002

The first thing you need to do is get a firm grasp of yourself and come to your senses.  You need to think straight.

If it were me, I would go to an attorney, fast, and begin drafting divorce papers.  Although I have heard of, and even know personally of an instance, where a RM/RW marriage failed and the lady remained in the US and got her green card, they are not like your case.  None of them involved infidelity.  You don't want her to remain here, and this is why .... if she's been here 1 1/2 years, you've probably signed and filed an I-864 (Affidavit of support).  This means you will be financially responsible for her, even if not married, until one of four things happen.. 1)she returns to her country, 2)she dies, 3) she becomes a naturalized citizen, or 4) she has been employed for at least 10 years (40 quarters), not just lived here for 10 years as some people think.

See a lawyer.

[Quick Fix]

... in response to Please help me, posted by John LV on Nov 23, 2002

Where did you originally meet her?
In what city and through an agency??

[MtMav]

... in response to Please help me, posted by John LV on Nov 23, 2002

you are on the wrong web site. Go to www.divorcesource.com.
It offers comprehensive information concerning divorce in all states. Don't think that your situation is unique! Read the message boards on the above site! Some of the horror stories are enough to curl your hair and cool the romantic ardor of any man! I wish you good luck.

[Bobby Orr]

... in response to Please help me, posted by John LV on Nov 23, 2002

You need a good lawyer familiar with immigration as well as divorce.  I hope you took care of your assets before you were married.

[Globetrotter]

... in response to Lawyer, posted by Bobby Orr on Nov 23, 2002

A sad story for sure.  Prenups and trusts before hand may insure that lawyers don't end up with the balance of your assets...the final insult.  Marrying anyone you don't know well, or even if you think you do, keeping the love and money separate has nothing to do with lack of trust of the other.  The way laws are stacked against guys, it is the only way I would ever enter into such a "legal partnership."

To John LV, keep the shiny side up, and you have friends here!