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Author Topic: Sanitorium in Sochi  (Read 6211 times)
Zink
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« on: November 01, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

Here's some more for you RickM.

We got to the Sanitorium Neva and had a look around.The lobby and public areas are very fancy. A lot nicer than this cowboy is used to staying in. But when I got our room I was a little disappointed. I've stayed in a couple of nice hotels but this more like an average motel back home. Not bad really and a lot better than my first apartment back in Volgograd. The only thing really lacking was a fridge. Most of our food rotted on us.

But we had meals included with our room so that wasn't a major problem. Just a shame to lose that much good food. The first day was sunday so everything was pretty much shut down. We wandered around and took pictures of the place and each other.

We were going to hit the beach but the sky looked funny. A couple of raindrops hit us so we headed indoors. We were sitting in the lobby bar for a few minutes when the sky fell. I've rarely seen rain like that in my life. The wind blew the rain in the main doors and flooded the lobby. They even had to shut down the elevators because the water was pouring down the shafts through the lobby doors. It was interesting to watch the workers try and scoop shovel the water out the doors while it was pouring down.

The next day we went to visit our main doctor. She took a quick look at us and told us to go to several others. The sanitorium gave us little pass books that we always carried around. Anytime we used one of their services we had to show that we were authorised by our doctor to be there.

I had a bad back so everyday I went to massage, a chiropractor and then a saltwater bath. The afternoons all I did was eat and wait for my lady. She had a couple of other doctors to visit each day. We scheduled most of our doctors appointments so that we would be together. But she has trouble getting up before 10 and then needs an hour to do her makeup. So most days I went alone and then she scrambled around trying to reschedule her appointments.

In the afternoons and evenings we went to the markets and shops to try and find some suitable beach clothes for my lady. We did find some but it ended up being a waste. The weather was cool and sometimes it rained so we only had one good day at the beach. My lady spent most of her time collecting small green stones that I would swear are wore down pieces of broken glass. I mentioned that and several people jumped on me and said they are stone. I have a couple of pieces and I'm thinking of taking them to a jeweller and seeing what they really are.

One morning the two of us were waiting to catch the elevator. My lady's sister Olya came out of another elevator. I looked at her and she looked at me. My lady was staring in the other direction. Then Olya started to walk away and so I said,"Privet." She started to laugh and my lady finally noticed her. My lady was very excited because Olya hadn't told us that she was coming down.

We did our morning doctors and then went to find a place for Olya to live. Now in Sochi many people own large houses or seperate buildings with rooms in them. All you have to do is look around and you can find dozens of places to rent. Of course this was during the off season. Maybe in the summer it would be harder to find something decent.

So Olya stayed with us during the day and went home at night to her room that was about 5 minutes from the sanitorium. She had food with her and our food that hadn't gone bad. But every meal We would smuggle some of our food or offerings from our table mates back for Olya. I got into trouble one day when my lady took several plates and silverware back to the room. I just played stupid(very easy for me) and told the waitress I wasn't with that woman. The other lady at the table almost fell on the floor laughing after the waitress left.

Our other tablemate was an older man. Him and the woman seemed to argue a lot but I didn't understand most of it. The last three days he was drunk the entire time. He kept trying to speak English with me. He was always kissing the girls hands and trying to compliment them. But he was so drunk that he wasn't coherent even in Russian. We spent some time trying to avoid him. But we still had to sit with him if he showed up for meals.

More later.

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Go2Rus
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« Reply #1 on: November 02, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Sanitorium in Sochi, posted by Zink on Nov 1, 2001

I had wondered before why you kept seeing only this one lady since you had problems with her on second trip also.  This showing up late bit, etc., I simply would not put up with.

Sounds like you should of taken the advice of experienced guys like Jack who advocate always having some back ups available, etc.

But, I do hope things get better in your next installment!!

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Zink
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« Reply #2 on: November 02, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Hi Zink, thanks for more; but I am with ..., posted by Go2Rus on Nov 2, 2001

I'm not going to go into much detail about my conflicts in Russia. I know that I caused many of them. But maybe you can learn something from this.

By my nature I am a one woman man. I prefer to focus on one thing or person at a time. I have always had back up plans. On my first trip everything went almost perfect. Even if I had met more ladies with the intent of starting a relationship I would have chosen her.

As for what happened in June... I wasn't about to throw her away because she had personal problems. And we were able to work through them. I'm looking for someone who will stand by me even through difficult times. And I practice what I preach. I am not going to abandon and ignore somebody I care for and then cry later because she left me. The rules are different when you care for somebody than they are when you are at the introductory stage.

Also in June I thought it was her personal problems that caused the stress between us. And my first two trips to Russia I was not really myself. My lack of knowledge about my situation and the language made me seem much more timid and weaker than I really am. She had doubts as to whether I could really take care of her. H3ll, I couldn't even feed myself on my first trip. Do you know how that feels? I'm a very independant man and I hated to rely on her so heavily. But she took care of me and never complained once about what I put her through. I didn't think that 2 or 3 bad days cancelled out the 6 weeks that we got along perfectly.

I've had to run around with her trying to fix things. She collapsed from exhaustion in my arms. I saw what her life had become and I gave her allowances because of that. Stress will do strange things to a person.  She is a great woman and a good friend. There are very many things that I love about her. But our personalities don't mesh perfectly.

As for following the experienced guys like Jack. He helped me with my unused backup plan in January. I've written to a couple dozen women all over the world. I have several good friends who are RWs and RMs. I have met dozens of RWs in Russia and talked with some of them about the MOB thing. I still write to several RWs that I was never romantically interested in. They are my friends, and some are even happily married. I have lived in Russia for 11 weeks. I have more experience than many of the guys who preach on this board. But I do things my way. I have regrets about what happened but I won't change my methods of operation. Each person has to do what they are comfortable with. And any RW will tell you that they want a man who is there for them and only them. My willingness to do that gives me an edge over the playboys.

There are so many things that you will only learn if you take the time to really know these women. I will put this in selfish terms for you. My lady was my greatest asset and resource. She taught me more about Russia, RWs and myself than this board ever could have. If I discarded her on a whim I would have lost all that before I learned all that I needed to. All too often on this board and other places I see guys ask the ladies for their opinions. Then when the ladies give it they are told that they are foolish or worse.  If somebody stands up for the ladies they are a suckup. People are not logical creatures. Many of the decisions we make don't follow logic, but they can still work. Maybe we need to take time to understand why the ladies do what they do even if it doesn't match our ideals.  Without that understanding we will never find a real match.

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KenC
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« Reply #3 on: November 03, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to My answer, posted by Zink on Nov 2, 2001

Zinkster,
Easy boy.  Your trip sounds like a major bummer so far.  I know I didn't question your commitment to your RW.  I for one didn't know you had such a history with her.  I agree that you sometimes have to step back and look at the "big picture".  But the way your story has gone so far, it seems that she was dissing you on numerous occasions.  Her illness may excuse some of that as you said.  It is a fine line to walk, you want to be patient enough to see it through, but at the same time there is a point where you have to cut bait and move on.  When should you do which one is entirely up to you.  I wish you the best.

As for your comments about women posters here: I think that there are some very valuable posts made here by women.  Russian wife comes to mind.  But they also should be challenged when they post something off the wall.  This can be done in a respectful manner.  Too often ANYTHING posted by a woman here is treated as gospel and any challenge is jumped on by "suck ups".  That "equal rights" thinking cuts both ways and women should be held as accountable for their posts as the men are.
KenC

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Zink
Guest
« Reply #4 on: November 03, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Re: My answer, posted by KenC on Nov 3, 2001

Ken,
I know I'm coming across a little strong here. But the thing is my little travelogs cut out both the best and the worst of my trips. There are personal things that I won't ever put on an open board.

And you're right it is a fine line to walk between being patient and being foolish. But I'm young and have time. So I gave her the benefit of a doubt. She dissed me alright. She dissed me big time in Sochi. Something happened towards the end of my trip in June that made her lose interest in me. I tried to keep her interested because I didn't know if it was me or her problems.

Maybe it was me but I know it wasn't her problems that made her lose interest. I'm inclined to think it was her because I know I'm the most perfect man there ever was(If you believe that I've got some ocean front property in Arizona for sale). But I'm not about to go join RWNA and cry that she was an evil, wicked woman who took advantage of me. We just weren't meant for each other.

But it's all a learning experience. I'm ticked off about this but I'm not really heart broke. We've decided to stay friends but I'm pretty sure that we'll drift apart quickly. This isn't the first time it's happened in my life and sometimes I was the initiator. We had some fun and I am most definitely a better man for knowing her.

All we can do in our lives is try our best. If the other people don't think that's enough, well that's their problem.

As for the women I for one don't believe everything they say is gospel. But instead of putting them down the men need to try and understand why they would say that. And yes sometimes it might be because they are crazy. But you never know until you look. I just thought it was bad that Katya got jumped all over because she said she fell for her husband through letters. Maybe not the most prudent thing but it was what happened. She can't change the past and it seems to have worked for her.

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KenC
Guest
« Reply #5 on: November 03, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Re: Re: My answer, posted by Zink on Nov 3, 2001

Zink,
You know, for a youngin, your pretty dam smart.  I was always proud of my accomplishments at your age (Buying my first business ect), but you sure got me beat with your outlook on women and travel experiences.  You have your act together and will do well with your Russian search.  You show an extrodinary amount of patience and wisdom for your age.

I used to have a "six month" rule when I dated.  When I would meet a new woman, there would be a great deal of excitement in the begining (on both sides).  Everything would seem to be perfect or at least dam good.  However, the closer the relationship got to the six month time line, the more cracks would appear in the Utopia.  Inevitably by the sixth month, the woman could not keep up the "image" of what she wanted me to believe to be the truth about her.  All the hidden problems, paranoias and motivations would surface by the sixth month.  Needless to say, by the seventh month, I was begining a new relationship with someone else.  LOL

I met my wife over three years ago and we have been married for over two years now.  The initial excitement and joy that I felt when we met, has not dissapated in any way.  This is not to say she or I are perfect, but we ARE perfect for each other.  I only wish you the same.
KenC

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tim360z
Guest
« Reply #6 on: November 02, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to My answer, posted by Zink on Nov 2, 2001

Good Luck in Sochi.
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Go2Rus
Guest
« Reply #7 on: November 02, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to My answer, posted by Zink on Nov 2, 2001

will help a person sort things out in their mind.  :-))

I wish you the very best.

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Mick
Guest
« Reply #8 on: November 02, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Sanitorium in Sochi, posted by Zink on Nov 1, 2001

Zink,

From your story so far I feel that it should have been you saying "koshmar" :-). Very interesting reading nevertheless and I share my hope with KenC that it does get better for you in the end..But only guessing.... and looking forward to the next chapter.

Mick

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KenC
Guest
« Reply #9 on: November 01, 2001, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Sanitorium in Sochi, posted by Zink on Nov 1, 2001

Zink,
I don't know if it is intended, but your trip sounds like it sucked.  Here's hoping for a big finish (for your sake).
KenC
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