KenC ... KenMan and company

[KenMan]

I have read where KenC spent over $250 a day for Agency services while visiting and finding his wife. He said it was money well spent. I agree. The Agencies like any business are about making money. The women leaving their country and family moving to a foreign land with a stranger is about economics. Of course a respect and friendship can grow into love. Most of the women there are "not" fluent in English and NEED the skills and services that an Agency provides. YOU ARE PAYING FOR THE SERVICE! If you want to limit yourself to only women fluent in English. Women who do not use or need the services of an Agency. You are limiting your choices. If you accept the Agency's services and are willing to pay for them guess what? You can get EXCELLENT SERVICE with the right business approach. BY SPENDING MONEY! I mentioned the name of a painter that I had seen and you know what? The Agency located him and will take me to his studio to meet him and see his art work. Now that is SERVICE!!! If you do not plan or want to spend any money I ask one question. Why are you pursuing younger women that live 10,000 miles from you? Get it?

[BubbaGump]

... in response to KenC ... KenMan and company, posted by KenMan on Oct 27, 2001

A lot of guys here last year wanted to do this on a low budget and they were able to do it that way and succeed.  But for guys that can afford it go ahead and go to an agency and spend some money and get better service.  

I think most businesses in the FSU want to deal with Americans because we have more money to spend. Once they realize you're not cheap I'll bet they get some better girls for you because they will think you are more successful.  They'll probably make more favorable statements about you when they call the women on the phone and tell you more about the girls.  

[Go2Rus]

... in response to KenC ... KenMan and company, posted by KenMan on Oct 27, 2001

Well you and I have a completly different attitude toward this, but both can be right depending on our personalities, etc.  I chose only ladies who could read and write without interpreter.  Then after a few messages, I asked if they could also speak and understand without an interpreter, and I dropped those who didn't pass that screen.

Was I glad that I set up those screens?  You had better believe it.  Even with the remaining ones, there were 2 or so that had trouble comprehending me even tho I could get what they were saying.  Of course that was due to the different breadth of vocabularies.  It becomes a real headache after a few hours of having to write out many concepts on a pad of paper.  Fun at first, but it wears thin.

I did however, have some very funny things happen in this regard.  One lady asked me back to her apt on first date.  We got into making out pretty good, and I wanted to get in even better position on her sofa for this.  So I wanted to get her completely horizontal on sofa and up across my chest as I was sitting upright.  I didn't want to alarm her however; so as I asked her to assume the position, I also added, "But you can keep your pants on."  She and I had been exchanging much humor and I thought she would get a real kick out of that, and at the same time it would put her somewhat at ease.

So she first says, "What are pants?"  She has her translation book nearby and starts to reach for it.  But then I change the word to 'trousers' and she understands that word.

But next she says, "What does it mean 'keep on.'  So I thought I would clarify by saying "You don't have to take off your trousers."

So she says, "What does 'take off' mean?"  Again, she starts to reach for her dictionary.

Then I realize that 'put on' and 'take off' are probably idioms and I tell her so.

But, alas, she has an idiom book also.  So she looks in it and you can guess what it gave as examples of 'take off' and 'keep on.'  Yep, they had to do with airplanes and staying on the same road.

By now I am starting to laugh in hysterics and she is also because she knows it is funny even tho she hasn't quite figured out what I had originally said.

But at this point, I realize she isn't going to get least bit upset about getting her legs and feet up on sofa and lay across me, so we just get to it.

Other very funny things like this also happened, but still I wouldn't change a thing.  No speaka da English, no go.

[BubbaGump]

... in response to English proficiency - funny stories, posted by Go2Rus on Oct 27, 2001

I am very close to my best friend and his family.  I made a comment that I love his daughters very much and my lady replied: I thought that was illegal in the US.  She knew a lot of phrases but don't think the girls understand half of what you're saying.  Don't use phrases and a lot of Russian words are based on the word the English use and not the word we use in America.

[Stan B]

... in response to English proficiency - funny stories, posted by Go2Rus on Oct 27, 2001

My lady spoke ok english when I met her in the Ukraine, but it would've been very difficult w/o our interpreter. Especially when meeting her parents, child and friends.
And if she didn't continue to study and improve her english skills after our engagement, it would've been impossible once she got here. As we don't have any problem communicating, but she is still extremely shy about speaking to others.
Thus for those looking I would say look for a lady that has at the least started to study and learn a little english and that has the desire to continue to do so.

[KenC]

... in response to KenC ... KenMan and company, posted by KenMan on Oct 27, 2001

Ken,
The $250 per day covered a flat, a driver and interpreters 24/7.  I have paid much more for a room.  Mind you, my flat was no luxury hotel, or even a Holiday Inn, but you get the point.  I liked the fact that my first trip was a "turn key" operation.  All I had to do is walk off the plane and the agency handled the rest.  My wife's English was plenty good enough for us to communicate well, but I found other uses for the interpreters.  I had them take me around to gather things for a Xmas basket that I put together for my wife's family.  I also used them to help me coordinate a romantic candlite dinner for my wife and I in my flat.  (I tried to be the same man I was in America while I was there)  I also used my interpreters as tour guides in Moscow on a day I couldn't be with my wife.  I know I got my monies worth.  The money I spent on my trip was small in comparison to my phone bill! LOL.

I did meet a few other women while I was there.  I cannot understand how you can get into any serious relationship with a woman that you cannot speak to.  Using an interpreter to communicate with a potential girlfriend was very uncomfortable for me.

It is not necessary for you to throw your money around while there.  Don't be cheap, but also don't try to play Daddy Warbucks either.  BE YOURSELF!  Try and behave in the same manner as you would here.  Best of luck to you.
KenC

[BubbaGump]

... in response to Re: KenC ... KenMan and company, posted by KenC on Oct 27, 2001

It can be a fine line between spending money and not seeming too cheap and looking gross for spending too much.  I thought my interpreter took advantage of me because she saw that I was not so limited on my spending.  On my second trip one girl spoke English so there was no need for the interpreter and the other had her friend interpret.  That was a pretty cheap trip.  You save a lot of money if the girl speaks English.  

In St Pete it was common for regular people to taxi you around cheaply.  You can save money versus the regular taxis.  My interpreter had me paying those people more than other people were because their dates were negotiating.  The metro (subway) is very cheap and the girl you are with and your interpreter probably already have a monthly ticket.

[Lynn]

... in response to Re: KenC ... KenMan and company, posted by KenC on Oct 27, 2001

than one would want to imagine.

You gave some good advice in those last few lines. I have seen men blow thousands of $ ,in a matter of a few days, with nothing to show for it-------(except a bad disposition afterwards). One guy, I know, dipped into his IRA to be able to woo his potential bride into marriage, after a outlay of approx. 16 grand (conservative) over the time of meeting/getting her here/the 90 days here-------he admited that she "never" told him that she had any intent to marry, when the subject came up the reply was always "maybe". I am sure she never knew, up until the last few days before she went back to Odessa, just what kind of hardship the guy put himself thru just to win her over and then I doubt that she trully believed him.

On the other hand, another friend from Minn. , met his wife to be, was always "up front" with her about everything (money, lifestyle, etc.), as you said, he was himself and things clicked ---------- they have been happily married for almost three years now.

[Go2Rus]

... in response to Re: KenC ... KenMan and company, posted by KenC on Oct 27, 2001

KenC says: "I cannot understand how you can get into any serious relationship with a woman that you cannot speak to. Using an interpreter to communicate with a potential girlfriend was very uncomfortable for me."

Just think of how hard it is for us guys to figure out what AW are saying.  And perhaps they are feeling the same about us.

Now factor in that the other woman doesn't even speak or understand English, and what are you facing then?

Now factor in that a 3rd party is going to stand between you and try to tell each of you what the other said.

Now factor in that the 3rd party is going to give a slight twist to everything as they see fit; hopefully in an effort to be of help, but who knows

[BubbaGump]

... in response to I agree with this Ken 100%, posted by Go2Rus on Oct 27, 2001

What really tempts me to bring back a girl with almost no English skills is that some of the hottest women speak no English.  I do better if the girl does know English though.  Then they can see that I can be pretty funny.

[Go2Rus]

... in response to But on the other hand, posted by BubbaGump on Oct 28, 2001

Yes, there is probably some truth there.  It is mere supply and demand.  Many guys like me have screens set for English skills.  Thus, the ones that have those skills are getting picked over pretty good.  The best looking ones  go first.  Therefore, it makes sense that, proportionately, non English speaking ladies seem to look pretty hot as you say.

[slimjimco]

... in response to I agree with this Ken 100%, posted by Go2Rus on Oct 27, 2001

NT

[mdante99]

... in response to KenC ... KenMan and company, posted by KenMan on Oct 27, 2001

I would like to know how successful you have been after spending that money.

I spent a grand total of $2500; that includes all search related costs, and two weeks trip to FSU.

My wife is highly educated, fluent in English and a Russian beauty to boot; she did well in her country and is not here for the visa.

You can see her photo at www.travelandtrips.com

Spending the amount of money has NO relationship to success; like many other things in life.

It is not the money that counts in this pursuit; it is the time and effort you put into it and how much you care for the lady; and you cannot buy that with money.

Mark

[BrianN]

... in response to Re: KenC ... KenMan and company, posted by mdante99 on Oct 27, 2001

Some guys can just "afford" to do it in such a first class way, and don't have any problems.  It's when the guys with money get stupid that screw things up for the rest.  If I had the funds to expend for a "perfectly comfortable" trip as that, I probably would do it that way, at least the first time.  Fwiw, by the time I will have returned from the FSU in January, my total expense over a 7 month period will probably be around 4K.  That's cheap considering what an AW costs just to date, considering the roi (lol).

[slimjimco]

... in response to Re: KenC ... KenMan and company, posted by mdante99 on Oct 27, 2001

You can go either route and be equally successful.  It takes work, skill, and a little luck.  Just like here.