Newbie here. Planning on going to International Introductions "A Romance Tour"..

[PaulChicago]

Hello Everyone,


I am very excited to join this forum and to see what I can learn from all the information and everyone's experiences. I am a 30 year old white male with brown hair and blue eyes. I am 6'1 and like to stay fit and eat healthy. My main goal is to go on Jamie's International Introduction Romance Tour and to hopefully find a very pretty Colombian girl that I can start the K-1 Fiance Visa process with.


What I am looking for is information and advice about the best way to find the right girl on a trip like this and the experience people have had with International Introductions Romance Tour. Please let me know what I can do to prepare for the trip that may increase my chances of finding the right women and what I can expect from the trip. I would really appreciate some advice and insight! Thank you very much!

[robert angel]

Hello Everyone,


I am very excited to join this forum and to see what I can learn from all the information and everyone's experiences. I am a 30 year old white male with brown hair and blue eyes. I am 6'1 and like to stay fit and eat healthy. My main goal is to go on Jamie's International Introduction Romance Tour and to hopefully find a very pretty Colombian girl that I can start the K-1 Fiance Visa process with.


What I am looking for is information and advice about the best way to find the right girl on a trip like this and the experience people have had with International Introductions Romance Tour. Please let me know what I can do to prepare for the trip that may increase my chances of finding the right women and what I can expect from the trip. I would really appreciate some advice and insight! Thank you very much!

Consensus in the past has consistently been:

Listen and learn from what Jamie tells you.

Work on your Spanish.

Especially if you don't have a lot of time, and have difficulty w/ Spanish, Jamie can help you make the most of your time help w/ language and put some gals in front of you who at least have been vetted to some extent.

Agencies and 'tours' are dying out, research, using the internet,social media and technology is as advisable as ever, but Jamie's operation still gets good reviews from newbies and seasoned veterans heading to BQ.

[PaulChicago]

Thank you very much for the advice Robert!!! I really appreciate it.


How can I DM you?

[robert angel]

Thank you very much for the advice Robert!!! I really appreciate it.


How can I DM you?

I'm pretty sure you have to post a certain number of times b4 you can send private messages.  Feel free to send a few blips, namely short posts (no violation doing so) and you'll be freed up to PM pretty quick.

You're in a great spot age wise-- in a lot of developing nations, women worry that guys in their twenties just.want to play, play, play and having hit that milestone puts ya in a fairly sweet spot.

While it's natural to gravitate towards the cutest, 'hottest' looking babes, realize that especially if you're hoping to bring her to the USA eventually, if she's an "8" on the cute/pretty/hot scale there, she'll be a lot closer to a '10' here.

The hottest babes are more likely to be higher maintenance and mileage may vary...

[PaulChicago]

Awesome!! Thank you very much for the information Robert! This was exactly the type of info that I was looking for. I look forward to bouncing some more questions off of you as I begin to prepare for my trip. Thanks again!

[Elexpatriado]

Awesome!! Thank you very much for the information Robert! This was exactly the type of info that I was looking for. I look forward to bouncing some more questions off of you as I begin to prepare for my trip. Thanks again!

You realize Robert has never set foot in Colombia?


Best wait for others on this site who have actually used Jamies service  (there are a few on here)to chime in


(Hopefully they do)


Sorry Robert .no offense intended

[benjio]

I think the latest back and forth on Jamie’s is this thread:

http://www.planet-love.com/index.php?topic=8645.0

My main goal is to go on Jamie's International Introduction Romance Tour and to hopefully find a very pretty Colombian girl that I can start the K-1 Fiance Visa process with.

You’re only 30. Take your time. Date a while. Get to know the culture. You may be one of the lucky few to find your dream girl on the first trip but it’s not likely. Even if you think you’ve found her there are a plethora or hurdles you’ll probably have to overcome before you get to the K-1 stage. Will she be able to handle the distance when you return? Will she be willing to dedicate herself to learning English? What’s her family’s financial situation and would you be expected to help them if you married her. The list goes on and on.

There are tons of awesome single, beautiful women in Colombia that would make great wives. But there are plenty of bat $hit crazy train wrecks as well. Jamie’s agency doesn’t do psychiatric analyses of the women and they don’t research whether or not they are gold-diggers or visa hunters. You have to figure that stuff out yourself, which most rookies have trouble doing because the beauty makes you stupid initially. I’m not sure why you’ve chosen to search for a wife SOTB but if you think you’re going escape from everything you dislike about American Women you’re probably wrong. The only significant difference is Colombianas are waaaaay hotter and most have a traditional approach to marriage, family and gender roles.

Best of luck.

[utopiacowboy]

Have you ever heard of the expression "no dar papaya"? You may want to google it.


The Colombian way of life is governed by two aspects of this expression. The first is that you should NEVER put yourself in a position to be taken advantage of. The second is if someone puts themselves in a position to be taken advantage of, then it is your duty to take advantage of them.


Most gringos used to life in North America are not equipped to deal with Colombia or its women. You have to be a ruthless suspicious SOB or else you will be eaten like a chihuahua at an alligator watering hole.


Colombian women are used to men who are selfish and cheat on them and even though they say they want a man who is not like what they are used to, they will take advantage of an unsuspecting gringo. Any weakness on your part will be used against you.


You must learn Spanish so you can understand what the people around you are saying - otherwise you will be at their mercy. I was extremely lucky in that my wife and her family always looked out for me but it could easily have been otherwise.

[mambocowboy]

Have you ever heard of the expression "no dar papaya"? You may want to google it.


The Colombian way of life is governed by two aspects of this expression. The first is that you should NEVER put yourself in a position to be taken advantage of. The second is if someone puts themselves in a position to be taken advantage of, then it is your duty to take advantage of them.


Most gringos used to life in North America are not equipped to deal with Colombia or its women. You have to be a ruthless suspicious SOB or else you will be eaten like a chihuahua at an alligator watering hole.


Colombian women are used to men who are selfish and cheat on them and even though they say they want a man who is not like what they are used to, they will take advantage of an unsuspecting gringo. Any weakness on your part will be used against you.


You must learn Spanish so you can understand what the people around you are saying - otherwise you will be at their mercy. I was extremely lucky in that my wife and her family always looked out for me but it could easily have been otherwise.

Excellent advice.

[JWR]

Welcome to the club.
I've used Jaime's agency, lived in BQ and Cali, and I like Jaime.
I recommend as soon as you get off the plane, go get laid to take the edge off.  Preferably 3 times to get a reset on your body and mind.  Don't start meeting these girls that Jaime introduces you to while you are still horny.  Your brain won't be functioning properly, and you won't even know how foolish you're behaving.  Jaime can help you find some hot girls that are not in the agency to help you get a physical and mental "reset".  Pay for it, have some fun, then move on to meeting some real girls.
Think of your 1st trip as a research mission, not an end game.  Focus on having fun, think of the girls as just fun dates, go out, relax, and take all the pressure off your trip.  If you are struck by lightning, and you meet the one, then great.  Don't plan on it, or obsess on "making the best of your trip"

You're young and have your entire life to make a bad decision that may follow you financially and emotionally for many years.  This is serious business if you are reckless, and can really screw up your life.  You bring a girl over here on a K-1, and you have then lost complete control.  Contrary to popular belief, you can't just send her back if she doesn't want to go.  There are ways for her to stay, and make your life miserable.  Time is on your side, and the longer you know a girl, and the more you spend time with her, the more she will reveal about herself unintentionally.  Take it slow, enjoy the entire process, and listen to the guys here on this board even after you meet a stunner, and you lose your mind.  And you will.

Down the road a bit, after you are speaking some Spanish if you're not already, and you meet one girl that stands the test of time, you can then consider doing a K-1.  I had a good 10 year run with a Cali girl, but I would certainly do things differently with my 20/20 hindsight.

[robert angel]

You realize Robert has never set foot in Colombia?


Best wait for others on this site who have actually used Jamies service  (there are a few on here)to chime in


(Hopefully they do)


Sorry Robert .no offense intended

Some sage advice above, especially from U.C., and Benjio & JWR, who know Jamie and the "lay of the land' quite well.

Of course I didn't insinuate I've been to Colombia, closest I got was 10 miles off of Venezuela last year, with no interest in going there! Might as well have been 1100 miles away.

But any advice given was pretty much a generic reply,  based on previous L.A. posts, on good advice period.

And of course, we don't always allow sufficient time to find the 'right' or at least 'best' woman.

Never mind Porsche, think "TIME: There is NO substitute."

This place has gone WEEKS without posts recently and when I saw a new member signed in, posted and a day went by with guess what? --> ZILCH posts, I figured well, somebody ought to respond.

Take Uncle Elex with a grain of salt, his mileage and reported satisfaction has  been quite varied, as has Calipro's.

That said, there's probably something to be learned from every one of us here--it's surprising but I can't think of any two of us here who got where they are today doing it the same way as another guy.

Just look for common denominators here, then factor in numbers of your own.


I guess what's left of the P.L. 'regulars' here is an overly busy bunch of feckers lol,!

I'M on a mix of lazy/busy 'permanent vacation' early retirement and yet I find time!

[Calipro]

Hello Everyone,


I am very excited to join this forum and to see what I can learn from all the information and everyone's experiences. I am a 30 year old white male with brown hair and blue eyes. I am 6'1 and like to stay fit and eat healthy. My main goal is to go on Jamie's International Introduction Romance Tour and to hopefully find a very pretty Colombian girl that I can start the K-1 Fiance Visa process with.


What I am looking for is information and advice about the best way to find the right girl on a trip like this and the experience people have had with International Introductions Romance Tour. Please let me know what I can do to prepare for the trip that may increase my chances of finding the right women and what I can expect from the trip. I would really appreciate some advice and insight! Thank you very much!

I didn't think anybody traveled to Colombia or anywhere else for the exclusive purpose of finding a wife in a few short weeks. I guess you haven't been influenced by the MGTOW (men going their own way) movement. jajaja


Best thing you can do is learn Spanish.


Second thing you can do which is a lot easier is read a couple of books to help you get rid of years of indoctrination into the feminist culture of the USA.


https://www.amazon.com/Rational-Male-Rollo-Tomassi/dp/1492777862/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3COWKA0IZ2GBR&keywords=rational+male&qid=1563579340&s=gateway&sprefix=ratio%2Caps%2C194&sr=8-1


I don't know what your track record is for attracting women. But there is only one book and one way I have found to work in Colombia and it is all in this book. Wish I would have it when I was 20 but now that I'm 57 this is the book I would have written to help guys approach women.


https://www.amazon.com/Models-Attract-Women-Through-Honesty/dp/1463750358/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1XF6DHFM2ZQNX&keywords=mark+manson+models+attract+women+through+honesty&qid=1563579423&s=gateway&sprefix=attract+women+with+honesty%2Caps%2C198&sr=8-1


After more than 20 years living in and traveling to Colombia there are two very important things I have learned.


Marriage is for procreation and having a family.  Do not marry a woman that does not want to have your babies. If you marry a woman with someone else's children then she will be marrying you so you can take care of her and some other guys kids......it can work out if you want to take that on....but why not have your own. If you date a woman with children she is going to make sure you want to take care of her kids....so don't fill shy about making sure a woman wants to have your children before getting too involved. Because if she isn't interested in having a family with you then it is anybody's guess why she would want to marry a guy she won't know every well and leaving her family, friends and everything she has ever known behind. And when you do find out what the reason is.....you very well might not like it much. jajaja


And the second thing I have learned about Colombia is that God wants you to be happy. It doesn't really matter if you believe that....because they do. And that is one big can of worms when you really sit down and think about it. Because someone can justify almost anything with that can of belief system. jajajaja


And that only thing that is going to put belief system in check is her commitment to you and your children. That is why it is very important that you find a Colombiana that wants to have a family with you.


If you don't want a family or aren't ready for a family then just go down to Colombia and enjoy yourself. And if you do get married just to bring her here so you have someone to live with until you are ready.....just know that it will most likely not last. So might as well bring the hottest one you can find. I did that a couple of times....wasn't bad and I don't regret it....but if you are looking for a relationship that will last then take my advice....and marry a Colombiana that wants a family with you.


One last thing....some guys are so out of touch that they some how think that I chick will not respect them or think that they are not serious if they try and sleep with them. I have seen a couple of this types on the board and they were doomed for failure.


There are few things that you can really know about someone on a one or two week trip. But luckily finding out if you are sexually compatible is one if the few things you can know for relative certainty in a couple of weeks. Because if a colombian chick really likes you....she will be sleeping with you every night.

[robert angel]

I didn't think anybody traveled to Colombia or anywhere else for the exclusive purpose of finding a wife in a few short weeks. I guess you haven't been influenced by the MGTOW (men going their own way) movement. jajaja


Best thing you can do is learn Spanish.


Second thing you can do which is a lot easier is read a couple of books to help you get rid of years of indoctrination into the feminist culture of the USA.


https://www.amazon.com/Rational-Male-Rollo-Tomassi/dp/1492777862/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3COWKA0IZ2GBR&keywords=rational+male&qid=1563579340&s=gateway&sprefix=ratio%2Caps%2C194&sr=8-1


I don't know what your track record is for attracting women. But there is only one book and one way I have found to work in Colombia and it is all in this book. Wish I would have it when I was 20 but now that I'm 57 this is the book I would have written to help guys approach women.


https://www.amazon.com/Models-Attract-Women-Through-Honesty/dp/1463750358/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1XF6DHFM2ZQNX&keywords=mark+manson+models+attract+women+through+honesty&qid=1563579423&s=gateway&sprefix=attract+women+with+honesty%2Caps%2C198&sr=8-1


After more than 20 years living in and traveling to Colombia there are two very important things I have learned.


Marriage is for procreation and having a family.  Do not marry a woman that does not want to have your babies. If you marry a woman with someone else's children then she will be marrying you so you can take care of her and some other guys kids......it can work out if you want to take that on....but why not have your own. If you date a woman with children she is going to make sure you want to take care of her kids....so don't fill shy about making sure a woman wants to have your children before getting too involved. Because if she isn't interested in having a family with you then it is anybody's guess why she would want to marry a guy she won't know every well and leaving her family, friends and everything she has ever known behind. And when you do find out what the reason is.....you very well might not like it much. jajaja


And the second thing I have learned about Colombia is that God wants you to be happy. It doesn't really matter if you believe that....because they do. And that is one big can of worms when you really sit down and think about it. Because someone can justify almost anything with that can of belief system. jajajaja


And that only thing that is going to put belief system in check is her commitment to you and your children. That is why it is very important that you find a Colombiana that wants to have a family with you.


If you don't want a family or aren't ready for a family then just go down to Colombia and enjoy yourself. And if you do get married just to bring her here so you have someone to live with until you are ready.....just know that it will most likely not last. So might as well bring the hottest one you can find. I did that a couple of times....wasn't bad and I don't regret it....but if you are looking for a relationship that will last then take my advice....and marry a Colombiana that wants a family with you.


One last thing....some guys are so out of touch that they some how think that I chick will not respect them or think that they are not serious if they try and sleep with them. I have seen a couple of this types on the board and they were doomed for failure.


There are few things that you can really know about someone on a one or two week trip. But luckily finding out if you are sexually compatible is one if the few things you can know for relative certainty in a couple of weeks. Because if a colombian chick really likes you....she will be sleeping with you every night.

Of course if you take a woman from her surrounding cultural values and take her to the USA, marriage and children or not, here in the 'land of milk and honey' with alimony, child support, materialism, bill boards screaming "Divorce for $175" and a few poorly chosen friends, all bets are off. The whole equation is skewed dangerously.

I gambled big, marrying a gorgeous woman well over twenty years my junior, me post vasectomy with two young sons, explaining I was NOT having it reversed. Being honest and open payed off. I wish I hadn't waited 4 whole years before asking for her hand, or we'd otherwise be looking at eighteen years together rather than 14. I kept saying to myself: "Too young, too cute, too well educated, great family--no...." But my embracing her total faith in God--(and a bit of superstition too) that's good, those God fearing values (and they're a very mixed bag) kept her true to course.

But yeah, children can be the glue or destruction of relationships.

I still say "Go big or go home" but when the stakes are big, giving it time and thought, but remaining alpha, objective and decisive---those traits will decide the outcome.

[mambocowboy]

Of course if you take a woman from her surrounding cultural values and take her to the USA, marriage and children or not, here in the 'land of milk and honey' with alimony, child support, materialism, bill boards screaming "Divorce for $175" and a few poorly chosen friends, all bets are off. The whole equation is skewed dangerously.

I gambled big, marrying a gorgeous woman well over twenty years my junior, me post vasectomy with two young sons, explaining I was NOT having it reversed. Being honest and open payed off. I wish I hadn't waited 4 whole years before asking for her hand, or we'd otherwise be looking at eighteen years together rather than 14. I kept saying to myself: "Too young, too cute, too well educated, great family--no...." But my embracing her total faith in God--(and a bit of superstition too) that's good, those God fearing values (and they're a very mixed bag) kept her true to course.

But yeah, children can be the glue or destruction of relationships.

I still say "Go big or go home" but when the stakes are big, giving it time and thought, but remaining alpha, objective and decisive---those traits will decide the outcome.

Good advice here from alot of experienced guys. I do think the OP shouldn't even be considering bringing a Colombiana to the States.  He should learn Spanish  have as much fun as possible in Colombia ,and then figure out a way to go expat....

[Calipro]

Of course if you take a woman from her surrounding cultural values and take her to the USA, marriage and children or not, here in the 'land of milk and honey' with alimony, child support, materialism, bill boards screaming "Divorce for $175" and a few poorly chosen friends, all bets are off. The whole equation is skewed dangerously.

I gambled big, marrying a gorgeous woman well over twenty years my junior, me post vasectomy with two young sons, explaining I was NOT having it reversed. Being honest and open payed off. I wish I hadn't waited 4 whole years before asking for her hand, or we'd otherwise be looking at eighteen years together rather than 14. I kept saying to myself: "Too young, too cute, too well educated, great family--no...." But my embracing her total faith in God--(and a bit of superstition too) that's good, those God fearing values (and they're a very mixed bag) kept her true to course.

But yeah, children can be the glue or destruction of relationships.

I still say "Go big or go home" but when the stakes are big, giving it time and thought, but remaining alpha, objective and decisive---those traits will decide the outcome.

I plan on bringing my wife and daughter to the US in a little less than five years. My daughter will be six, my wife will be 36 and I'll be 62.


I will be in a unique position in that my wife will collect about $1400 a month in child in care benefits from my Social Security record and my daughter will also collect about $1400 for being the minor child of a Social Security beneficiary.


If my wife divorces me she will stop getting the 1400 a month. I don't think that would stop someone from leaving if the really wanted. But it would be a loss on her part none the less.


I'm sure there will be plenty of thirsty guys in the US half my age that would think that taking my wife and raising my daughter as their own would be a great way for them to spend the rest of their lives. jajaja But they haven't met me yet. LOL!


I have thought about the talk I would have with a guy that wanted to do that to himself. About how having to deal with me for really the rest of his life would ruin any peace and tranquility he might have ever envisioned for himself.


I'm not above taking the guy out altogether if it came to it. No guy other than me will live with my daughter until she is 18. The only way that my wife could live with someone else is if my daughter lived with me or I'm dead. I don't really think my wife would go down that road because we have already discussed this and she knows I am dead serious.


I guess she could just up and leave without a trace and never see me or live in our house in Colombia again.....but I have hard time seeing her as being that selfish. Taking my child away from me isn't something I think she is capable of. She knows I love my daughter and my daughter loves me. And I don't think she even thinks it is possible for me to be completely replaced by some other guy.


I don't have a thing to worry about here in Colombia because no guy is going to sign up to take care of another man's child....really very rare and the only time I have seen it done is if the woman has the new guys child and then sometimes the guy will accept the kid from another man living in his house.

[robert angel]

I didn't think anybody traveled to Colombia or anywhere else for the exclusive purpose of finding a wife in a few short weeks. I guess you haven't been influenced by the MGTOW (men going their own way) movement. jajaja


Best thing you can do is learn Spanish.


Second thing you can do which is a lot easier is read a couple of books to help you get rid of years of indoctrination into the feminist culture of the USA.


https://www.amazon.com/Rational-Male-Rollo-Tomassi/dp/1492777862/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3COWKA0IZ2GBR&keywords=rational+male&qid=1563579340&s=gateway&sprefix=ratio%2Caps%2C194&sr=8-1


I don't know what your track record is for attracting women. But there is only one book and one way I have found to work in Colombia and it is all in this book. Wish I would have it when I was 20 but now that I'm 57 this is the book I would have written to help guys approach women.


https://www.amazon.com/Models-Attract-Women-Through-Honesty/dp/1463750358/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1XF6DHFM2ZQNX&keywords=mark+manson+models+attract+women+through+honesty&qid=1563579423&s=gateway&sprefix=attract+women+with+honesty%2Caps%2C198&sr=8-1


After more than 20 years living in and traveling to Colombia there are two very important things I have learned.


Marriage is for procreation and having a family.  Do not marry a woman that does not want to have your babies. If you marry a woman with someone else's children then she will be marrying you so you can take care of her and some other guys kids......it can work out if you want to take that on....but why not have your own. If you date a woman with children she is going to make sure you want to take care of her kids....so don't fill shy about making sure a woman wants to have your children before getting too involved. Because if she isn't interested in having a family with you then it is anybody's guess why she would want to marry a guy she won't know every well and leaving her family, friends and everything she has ever known behind. And when you do find out what the reason is.....you very well might not like it much. jajaja


And the second thing I have learned about Colombia is that God wants you to be happy. It doesn't really matter if you believe that....because they do. And that is one big can of worms when you really sit down and think about it. Because someone can justify almost anything with that can of belief system. jajajaja


And that only thing that is going to put belief system in check is her commitment to you and your children. That is why it is very important that you find a Colombiana that wants to have a family with you.


If you don't want a family or aren't ready for a family then just go down to Colombia and enjoy yourself. And if you do get married just to bring her here so you have someone to live with until you are ready.....just know that it will most likely not last. So might as well bring the hottest one you can find. I did that a couple of times....wasn't bad and I don't regret it....but if you are looking for a relationship that will last then take my advice....and marry a Colombiana that wants a family with you.


One last thing....some guys are so out of touch that they some how think that I chick will not respect them or think that they are not serious if they try and sleep with them. I have seen a couple of this types on the board and they were doomed for failure.


There are few things that you can really know about someone on a one or two week trip. But luckily finding out if you are sexually compatible is one if the few things you can know for relative certainty in a couple of weeks. Because if a colombian chick really likes you....she will be sleeping with you every night.

My wife's a lot younger than I and if I die before her, she walks into my pension. If she leaves me, she doesn't get any of it and  the amount my monthly pension goes up significantly, effectively a 'single's rate. I am getting less now--> I call it "The pretty young wife penalty."

She's adapted well in the USA and is about at that potentially dangerous point in our lives, where her job is not only good (livable) and promising, but she could probably make enough to 'go it alone.' So in a way, other than for love, she really doesn't need me.

I'm just glad her core values haven't changed drastically.  As for her salary, I don't keep track of it. My  ongoing positive regard for her family has helped keep us together.  She's put her siblings thru university, bought a house 'over there' for us (and this summer added a 2nd story and veranda to it) and her having a house back home was a major life 'bucket list' milestone for her. Same as the love of her family, siblings, nieces and nephews, who will return her love and care for her in her old age. But if I were a prick, she could leave and  pretty much make it on her own.

But all the while, she's been overly generous with her earnings towards me. A lot of our house's (still in my name, but if she asked, I'd add her name to deed) monthly utilities she has drafted from her orginal checking account. It took me forever to allow us to co mingle our banking accts. ---she didn't nag me. But 'date nights' out,  countless gifts, an almost crazy dedication to my domestic bliss, her just spoiling me rotten, if it ended tomorrow (and I tell myself "Nothing lasts forver") I'd still have to say "WORTH IT, thanks!"

She was ALL about me taking early retirement, taking my pension at 1st chance, not staying on for more $$$.  I'm not eligible for social security for a while yet, but while she knows how SS works and there are a few things we don't have that  drawing SS at age 62 would get us faster, she insists I do it how I want to.

I'll probably put off collecting SS a good while, as it will increase  roughly 8% a year for ea year I put it off. We figured how much I saved--our 'nest egg' and how much cash a month we need to pull from the bank ea month to stay ahead of my pre retirement income. I think we had enough for 25 years, but hey, anybody seen the new mid engine Corvette Chevrolet introduced yesterday?

She thinks I should get one, because:

"You deserve it..."

Up until last year, when I surprised her with new Camry (she insisted on transferring half the purchase price from her checking acct to pay) she was happy driving her 1997 Camry.

I'm not going to get that Vette quite yet, but next month we're off to spend a couple weeks in Michigan w my family, then off to 5 countries and 9 cities in W. Europe. Europe's another 'bucket list' thing for her. She has this "Switzerland bug" lol. So why not throw in London, Paris, Venice, Rome etc?

Then next year, we'll spend a month at our house in the Philippines, surrounded by her family. Our mutual family's support of us and our unified front in how we deal with our family has been a MAJOR binding force for our marital health.

But I could limit potential loss by hurrying up and spending our disposable liquid assets, all by us 'living it up' a bit. And we will 'live it up!"

In short, I'm sorta planning on spending my son's inheritance. They'll be OK--I raised them that way and they were mostly with me from a young age on.

My ex has NEVER dated--not once, no other Male over my sons.

And my wife, wonderful Stepmom to my sons and my ( not so large) money? She says that I should enjoy, spend it now, that "Life is too short", that "It holds no promises"  but if I DO leave anything, that I need to be sure my two sons are treated fairly, as she always wants to be 'fair.'

I was married once before, for 14 years to another Filipina who I met here in the USA. She was an orphan--terrible childhood--I was not thinking clearly enough and the eventual wreckage was awful. Money was an awful part of it. I rushed into that storm.

But "All's fair in love and war" and I learned as I went.

And while I feel that to an extent, that you "Make your own luck"-- I know I've been, that I am a lucky guy. Right here and now.

[robert angel]

I guess in a nutshell what you can take away from the long posts is that if she doesn't have love and have allegiance for her family, she's not likely to have that same 'sticktoitiveness' to stay with you,  for better or worse.

That said, the two of you should still be a separate unit, unified in agreement on how and when to help (or not help) family. As said, I didn't watch (or need to) my wife helping her family out. But we had a "One shot, one time, deal" where she'd help a sibling get thru college and land a job, but just ONCE. As each member became settled successfully, (independent) they in turn helped other family members do the same, as well as help out my widowed Mother-in-law.

The alternative stereotype of 'Marry the woman, marry the family" where the sucker Kano marries a babe and forever after keeps her family in food, beer, cigarettes and rent DOES happen and causes trouble.

But if the gal you're seriously considering already has a kid/s or perhaps even if she doesn't want to, chances of her strongly bonding with you are lessened.

She's just likely to put the kids 1st.

Worst I've seen (and heard here repeatedly) is the "Little Prince Syndrome" in Colombia, L.A., where a woman has a boy from a previous relationship.  You marry her and you will likely always be second banana to a spoiled brat boy.

I have seen guys who tried to raise those little princes right--with discipline, but had their wives promise to reform their child raising ways, but the Mama just wasn't capable of doing so. Constant sort of friction, that really reflected the (not to be spoken, but true) fact that in the 'pecking order', the Step dad would always be second, despite her protestations to the contrary.

They'll let the kid get away with murder, even let him sleep in the same bed, for way longer than they should.

Even my sons, who respect and love my wife, their Stepmother, favor their natural Mother-- that's just pretty much how it's naturally supposed to be.

[Elexpatriado]

Good advice here from alot of experienced guys. I do think the OP shouldn't even be considering bringing a Colombiana to the States.  He should learn Spanish  have as much fun as possible in Colombia ,and then figure out a way to go expat....

I agree, though at 30 years of age this may not be practical, unless he is in the IT business and can work from home. Even then there are the Colombian Tax implications ( which many ignore).

Though others have brought a woman  back to the US, and things went sour and there miraculously was no or little financial implications, there is the risk of having to pay alimony   50% of your net worth increase during the time of the relationship, and paying back any government suport she goes on.
And I personally strongly  believe PreNups are useless. Like giving the fox in charge a detailed inventory of the Hen House.
And with Trump in power, the process is even more difficult and the responsibilities more onerous what with the homeland security/ ICE 10 year support commitment you have to sign.
That being said, if the OP wants to have a family with children, there is the moral dilemna of raising them.in Colombia.Eventually, sooner or later you will want to let them have the better opportunities that US citizens have.

If he just wants  to import a little " portable R and R" or eye candy then yes, its better just to vacation in Colombia.

Though being 30 years old and depending on his career and flexibility  , the expat or frequent visitor option may not be professionally or financially practical for years or decades.

One thing , at 30 years old I would definitely cross single mothers off the list.

[Elexpatriado]

I'm sure there will be plenty of thirsty guys in the US half my age that would think that taking my wife and raising my daughter as their own would be a great way for them to spend the rest of their lives. jajaja But they haven't met me yet. LOL!


I have thought about the talk I would have with a guy that wanted to do that to himself. About how having to deal with me for really the rest of his life would ruin any peace and tranquility he might have ever envisioned for himself.


I'm not above taking the guy out altogether if it came to it. No guy other than me will live with my daughter until she is 18. The only way that my wife could live with someone else is if my daughter lived with me or I'm dead. I don't really think my wife would go down that road because we have already discussed this and she knows I am dead serious.

https://youtu.be/cmAKp1JUhEQ

[robert angel]

I agree, though at 30 years of age this may not be practical, unless he is in the IT business and can work from home. Even then there are the Colombian Tax implications ( which many ignore).

Though others have brought a woman  back to the US, and things went sour and there miraculously was no or little financial implications, there is the risk of having to pay alimony   50% of your net worth increase during the time of the relationship, and paying back any government suport she goes on.
And I personally strongly  believe PreNups are useless. Like giving the fox in charge a detailed inventory of the Hen House.
And with Trump in power, the process is even more difficult and the responsibilities more onerous what with the homeland security/ ICE 10 year support commitment you have to sign.
That being said, if the OP wants to have a family with children, there is the moral dilemna of raising them.in Colombia.Eventually, sooner or later you will want to let them have the better opportunities that US citizens have.

If he just wants  to import a little " portable R and R" or eye candy then yes, its better just to vacation in Colombia.

Though being 30 years old and depending on his career and flexibility  , the expat or frequent visitor option may not be professionally or financially practical for years or decades.

One thing , at 30 years old I would definitely cross single mothers off the list.

Yup, good poop above. You bring her to this country, kids or no kids, you could potentially be on a very sharp hook, required to be her financial support after things go bad. For a long time too. While in some states (few) pre nups have some tiny teeth, a prenuptial is more often useless or even will work against you.

Imagine that young little pretty brown eyed senorita in divorce court, crying a river-- hardly able to speak a sentence in English, never mind get and keep a job capable of supporting her at the lifestyle level you're now legally obliged to continue providing her!!

You bastard, the book's already written and it can get thrown at you REALLY hard!

[PaulChicago]

Thank you very much for all the responses!! Oh wow I have a lot to think about...




I know I am young for this but I have a good career and am in a good spot financially. I am looking for someone I can build my future with and am going into the trip with that intention but not forcing anything and want to see what the experience will be like. I don't plan on going or there is the hottest one come back to the USA with me haha. I do want beauty obviously like everyone else but the vibe has to be right.


How does it work with Jamie's International Introduction when you meet these girls?

[PaulChicago]

I know I may be coming across as gullible but I am thinking optimistically that I may me someone that I want to take a chance with down there...

[robert angel]

I know I may be coming across as gullible but I am thinking optimistically that I may me someone that I want to take a chance with down there...

When I was thirty, I thought it was 'time' for me to marry. For me, it was very wrong--I wasn't ready and I picked the wrong woman. Take your time, have a lot of fun. Be yourself. It's hard to be yourselves in 'la la land' with resorts, hotels, restaurants, spending money, trying to make a best 1st impression while you're effectively intoxicated in a tropical, hormonally charged environment!  Giving things time & making multiple trips has delivered the best results here.

In the big picture I think if you're close to forty y/o when you have kids and about age 60 when they leave the nest and you retire it's a good scenario. Sorta turned out that way for me and importantly I was (am) still able to be physically active w/ my sons (sports etc) and their friends-- even culturally relevant to an extent...

But no matter how rosey you view different scenarios, and being smart and idealistic IS good, rushing is NOT good.

Marriage, if you expect quality, is not some 'Shake n Bake' quickie recipe!

[benjio]

Thank you very much for all the responses!! Oh wow I have a lot to think about...




I know I am young for this but I have a good career and am in a good spot financially. I am looking for someone I can build my future with and am going into the trip with that intention but not forcing anything and want to see what the experience will be like. I don't plan on going or there is the hottest one come back to the USA with me haha. I do want beauty obviously like everyone else but the vibe has to be right.


How does it work with Jamie's International Introduction when you meet these girls?

I sincerely hope you find what you’re looking for.

[PaulChicago]

Thank you very much Robert!!! If you could please can you DM me maybe your email or anything that I can message you through. It would be greatly appreciated!