Hey guys, I'm new here but just infatuated with this Colombian woman

[quelindo]

So, I'm new here but I'm 26 years old and well by all accounts a pretty good looking and charming guy (my Mom tells me I am anyways).  I'm a bit unique I suppose being an attractive redhead and I don't mean to be cocky or boastful but my point is that I have absolutely no problem meeting women here.  I think that's just as much due to the fact that I really am a good person and treat everyone with respect, and am very friendly, outgoing, and funny...blah blah you get the picture.

I have always favored exotic women, which I suppose is fairly natural.  I've never been one to settle and I had a very serious relationship and almost married a stunningly gorgeous half Persian girl.  She turned out to be completely insane, but after that ended I spent some time thinking...what kind of woman do I really like?  I liked her figure and skin and physical appearances very much (I like curves - I'll admit it).  Physical appearance is nothing to base a relationship on however, and so I thought deeper into it.  It's pretty well established women of Colombia are some of the most beautiful in the world (the most beautiful in my opinion).  I learned about the culture though and I loved the women's passion and fire for life.  Loyalty.  Playfulness and just the way these women are...and I decided, alright I'm going to find a beautiful Colombian girl.  I went to college with a few different guys from Colombia who are friends now, but I didn't know any women.

I randomly met the most beautiful Colombian woman on Facebook...and it's really stupid and random how it happened but I just saw this girl and was completely captivated.  To the point that I just couldn't forget her!  She came to Miami about 4 years ago and lives in Doral now, and is a Costena from Cartagena.  I tried to introduce myself and mentioned I'd be in Miami for business and wanted to see if she'd like to hang out with myself and my friend.  She ignored me for a year, but apparently had a boyfriend.  Then after a year she randomly finally showed interest and we began talking...and I've just become completely infatuated.  Yes, she's breathtakingly beautiful but I just love the way she is, the things she says to me, her attitude towards life, just everything.  She's very sweet and warm and lovely and wants to travel the world and believes life is too short and...yeah I got it bad for this girl.

Is it weird that I feel this way when I've not even met this woman?  She's honestly the only Colombian woman I know.  I literally decided to work on my Spanish a year ago because I saw how beautiful this girl was and I didn't think I'd ever meet her...but I could never forget her.  I speak decent Spanish and her English is great, and it's going well.

I need to visit her in Miami, and I could do that in as soon as 3 weeks to a month.  She asked me to come to Colombia with her this Summer too (Cartagena)!  That would be a dream...just keep in mind, I've not met her in person yet!

Please do understand I really have plenty of beautiful women that are interested in me, but they just don't do it for me...this girl...I literally think I'd be happy to be with her, although of course I'd take my time and get to know her better.

I just want to know is it weird and/or crazy how I met her randomly on Facebook and am just so taken with her?  I find myself falling for her personality and good heart and she's educated and just...perfect.

I want to get travel plans to Miami lined up, and I'll be posting here more and welcome any and all advice - thanks guys.

KC

[stnmasn]

Get your ass to miami and meet her in person. Spend some time there and get to know her.

Another thing maybe just cool your jets a little and take a breath. She may or may not be the one. But you'll never know until you get to know her for real, so get down there and meet her and charm her and see what happens.
 
You have it much easier than alot of the guys here if your girl is already here in the USA. Good for you.

Practice your spanish and go see her.

Suerte.

[quelindo]

I speak fairly decent Spanish, but literally for a year she didn't even acknoweldge I existed although we were Facebook Friends.  We were friends for a year and she became an after thought to me, and I just went about my life because I thought she wasn't interested but then one day out of the blue...literally over a year later, she contacts me.  She clearly showed interest and that was all I needed.  She told me I'm so cute and sweet etc...and so we started talking via text and phone.  It's been 2-3 weeks now we've talked and she told me "I will wait for you to come to Miami.  I don't know what it is but I can't stop thinking of you.  I always want to talk to you, but I don't want to bother you."

I told her she never bothers me and I feel the same way, and I literally am always smiling when I text her or talk to her.  I drive a maroon Camaro SS and she was joking with me and said "U drive a purple camaro!! Bumblebee's lost cousin lol!"  I just loved that...I will always remember that.  She also said "Te mando dos besos :* un beso para buenas noches y un beso asi que usted pensaran en mi manana"

I freaking died!  So sexy to me...she gives mi perrito besos and I love that too.  We talk about our dreams to travel the world, and we think life is too short so you shouldn't settle for less than you want...and I guess being facebook friends for over a year before we talked allowed us to get to know each other a bit, because we weren't trying to attract the other at that point.  She told me that she's so lucky to have met me, and it's just incredible.  I mean it would be a dream to marry this girl, but I think you're right I need to just go visit her in Miami, and cool my jets and just go with the flow, but I just think this may really be something special.  I'm not dead set on finding a Colombian wife, but I am deadset on this particular woman.  I have totally fallen for her over our talking and just because of the person she is...and my friends may not understand but if it makes me happy..why not?  Our society has changed, so I feel there's nothing wrong with meeting women on the internet.

I'm going to visit her in Miami soon then, I can't wait much longer!  She can't either.  If it all goes well, I'll hopefully join her in Cartagena this summer.


Ay carrumba ella es tan hermosa, no?  I apologize, it's just that my last relationship ended so badly, and I gave myself a year to improve myself and get over the heartbreak from that and it was wonderful when the girl of my dreams messaged me up so unexpectedly.  I know I'm probably annoying but I hope you can relate to when you first met that Colombian woman you knew you might marry someday...


Tell me I'm not crazy.  Really, please do.  Well, I am a little crazy

KC

[V_Man]

Welcome!
Yes we know how it is. You are not crazy.
However, I think you realise, you also have a lot to learn.
Colombian women are very affectionate. It is perfectly normal for them.

Just take things one step at a time. You can always stop the boat and get off.
Just don't get her pregnant.
Go to Miami and meet her. If it all goes great then go to Cartegena with her. You'll have a blast.
Then travel around the world with her. Why not?

The first step is to meet her in person. You really can't know what is real until you reach that stage.

[JWR]

Mr. Q L...
Welcome, we need some new faces around here.
I don't know what you are waiting for....  The time it took you to write those two posts you could have been on your way to the airport.
There is only upside here... She's already here and has a visa, you don't have to sign your financial life away to get to know her, you don't have to worry about her using you as a boat to the US. 
Have fun and keep us posted.
Miami is an amazing place.
 
One more question....is that her photo you posted??   I think posting photos of gfs here without their permission is not cool at all.  Get it yanked if you can I suggest.

[Alabamaboy!]

No offense, but how bad is your financial situation that you have not gone down there yet for at least a weekend visit?

You should quit wasting time here asking questions and go down there and get to meet her.

Also if this is the first Colombiana you have met, don't get too eager or desperate for her. Because the photo you posted is OK, but you can find 100 as good or better looking than her in a day in CTG or BAQ. (IMO).

[stnmasn]

KC..  Well you might be a little crazy but that's OK you aren't alone. Your enthusiasm is awesome.

What your friends think really doesn't matter as long as you are happy. But if they are your friends keep in mind that they are probably just looking out for your best interests,,,especially if they know how tough your last breakup was.

 

[quelindo]

Part of the hesitation is that I'm going to Cabo San Lucas Mar 1-4 for a company "reward" trip.  If we had been talking a month before, I could have had her join me.  Financially I'm doing well now but as many finance majors in my age (26) I lost my job in a very bad way when the economy crashed and it took me a few years to recover.  This year I'll make enough money to do whatever I want, and hopefully pursue some business opportunities which allow me freedom to travel and/or relocate.  I am in Investment Banking in the Oil & Gas industry, and if I brush up on my Spanish there are plenty of opportunities abroad or I can have a good stable life here.


Either way, you guys are right though...why hesitate?  I'm young, nothing to lose, and it's just a visit to a beautiful woman who wants to see me.  Waiting doesn't do anything good for me.  Whatever I said above about Cabo, that's just some excuse...really isn't pertinent to why I would or would not visit this girl immediately.

I think I just wanted to make sure the girl really likes me before I ventured to Miami.  I wanted to make sure I wasn't just a rebound, but she's never dated a gringo and I think just as much as I see her as the most beautiful and attractive woman she feels the same way towards me.  It's almost hard to believe when your dream girl truly likes you as much as you like her, but I make the mistake of viewing her based on the way American women act.  That's a big mistake. She's genuine and passionate and just caught up in the romance but if I don't visit soon that can fade away...

Also - it's pointless for me to care what anyone else thinks.  I never care in any other aspect of my life, and if I really feel she may be the one...who cares?  I'll be happy if so, and what anyone else says or thinks doesn't matter one bit.  She was that girl who I just knew I would hate myself if I didn't go for it.

Thanks for the advice, and glad to find this site!  I'm going to chill and relax just a bit, but get my ass down there ASAP and make the most of this wonderful opportunity.

KC

[InnocentVixen]

Well sounds like you already made your mind but allow me to give you a female point of view from a very non-colombiana girl (mexican)


You sound incredibly sweet and infatuated, nothing wrong with that, it's new to you and you are young to boot so you have all the reasons in the world to feel this way, let me tell you something else, I don't know if it's a coincidence but I have a thing for red heads... yes freckles and all! (I disagree about handsome redheads being that rare btw) and they seem to like me back, I've been asked if I have persian mix and a few have ended up with strong infatuations with me even though I am not the prettiest girl out there, not to mention I don't show much skin and I get uncomfortable with unwanted attention, anyways, maybe there is something about looks that makes us get attracted, I think it makes sense this half naked girl that has shown some interest in you gets you pretty excited, but don't forget personality/compatibility goes a long way, believe me I've been there, not worth it if it's just for the looks.


Also please don't forget that you are an attractive man that can get plenty of attention in the US... I am tempted to suggest you go to Colombia to open your eyes as to just how attractive you would be over there, but if you are looking for a serious relationship you might as well stay away from that, all the options would overwhelm you, you would sure have fun though!


Best of luck with this woman, do go meet her where she lives before you go out on a vacation with her to make sure you get along if you can, specially if you plan to go to Colombia with her, if things don't work out and you are stuck down there surrounded of what you thought was exotic beauty you will be hitting your head against the wall for wasting an opportunity like that

[quelindo]

Thank you so much that was one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me! You are certainly quite stunning and do in fact look very similar to mi Persian ex novia.  She often had Latina men approach her and speak Spanish not knowing she was Persian.  You, mi ex novia, y Naty mi Colombiana are all stunning women in my opinion. 


I do love being a redhead as I like to stand out from the crowd, and I am very confident and like most Texans also very outgoing and friendly although probably come off as more California than Texas.  I meet both women and friends very easily. People call themselves hopeless romantics, but I like to think I'm a hopeful romantic.  I'm very passionate and tend to lose interest in American women because they lack passion.  I find many to be quite ignorant, close minded, judgmental, and totally unaware of the vast world in which we live.  I have no interest in wasting my time on women unless they absolutely set my heart on fire with passion and intrigue.  I find that with Latina women!


I don't mean this in a cocky way, but since you do not know me personally I will just say that meeting women has never been a problem, however I have no interest in empty sexual encounters.  I'm old enough now that is simply a waste.  Your words were so kind still, and make me feel more confident in myself   Because I don't show interest in most women, I suppose it drives them crazy because I'm not like other guys.  They approach me even if I'm not trying to talk to them...so I just know women will always be there and if I feel the need, I can go meet one when I please.  Not my style though.


All of that being said - I just find Naty to be so perfect.  Not because she's sexy.  I am used to beautiful women.  There are many beautiful women in any big city, but it's rare to find an intelligent woman with a good heart and passion for life and love.  I don't find myself attracted to all Colombian women, just Naty.  Ella es la unica Colombiana yo conozco, and I would be happy if she was the last.  Perhaps she is like a fairy tale to me...this woman who was so strikingly beautiful and did not seem interested even though many other women tried to get my attention.  Finally a year later all on her own Naty showed interest in me and it was like a dream come true.  I got to know her better and she is so sweet, genuine, warm, passionate, affectionate...ay carrumba.  Her family seems so nice, she likes dogs also, and although many men try to get her attention she seems quite dedicated to me.

I don't forget that I am young still and so is she.  I am clearly infatuated with this girl, so I have to remind myself to be grounded.  I don't doubt I could meet any kind of woman I want, but I just have this longing to be with Naty.  Perhaps I'm under her Colombiana spell, and I may later regret it - pero...la vida es un ratico, no?

*Sorry for the length of this post, I suppose I should work on more concise responses*

[michaelb]

.
There is only upside here... She's already here and has a visa, you don't have to sign your financial life away to get to know her, you don't have to worry about her using you as a boat to the US. 
Have fun and keep us posted.
Miami is an amazing place.
 

Wrong.....Assuming she is telling the truth about being in Florida, we still don't KNOW that she has a VISA, we only KNOW that she is HERE. Big difference. Quelindo, better check that out and verify it.

And JWR is right, not cool to post pictures without permission.

Anyway, welcome and good luck. 

[InnocentVixen]

I am glad to hear you have better things to say about her besides her looks and how happy you are now that she finally looked your way! I must admit seeing that picture of her gave the the wrong idea, I'm sure the lady would appreciate if you remove the picture or at least choose a more modest one.


Have you ever wondered if the reason she didn't notice you that much at first when you are used to getting the attention of the girls fast might be one of the factors you are this interested? this is neither a good or a bad thing, just different, as long as you stay realistic it should be ok, it's so easy to create your own little story in an imaginary world when you are talking online with someone, that is why I think when you are interested in someone online you should meet asap.


Michael has a very good point about the visa thing, she might not have one, but then again you are not talking about marriage here, just meeting a long time penpal in person, if you guys get along do ask her about this, trust but verify

[robert angel]

Good luck man. Looks like she's built like your Chevy--for speed--she might even be a 580 hp Camaro ZL1! It's nice that even after a year as a facebook friend, that you hadn't become sort of like old familiar wall paper-- almost invisible to her--that she still sought you out--interesting.....
 
 
It's best to be low key about your income and material possessions on-line--otherwise you can easily become 'a mark'.
 
 
If I spoke Spanish, was single and lived in Miami, I can't imagine ever, ever having to look far for date of any color or nationality. We sometimes stop and stay a few days in South Beach, Miami on our way down to Key West and besides walking the likes of Collins Blvd & Ocean Drive---a stroll on the beach will also turn up all 'the beautiful people'--many rich, thin and usually tan--from South, Central and North America, Israel, the rest of the Middle East, Russia, former USSR nations and Europe--it's just like candy store for lust and hedonistic fun down there. Besides brown eyed beauties, there are some Lativian and Ukrainian babes down there that will make you think you're going blind!
 
 
The Waldorf Towers is reasonable for being right on the best part of Ocean Dr., close to the Mango Club/Cafe, a few doors from the old Versace mansion etc. Even if she turns into just a sweet bubble that goes 'poof', you'll probably find some folks to party with thereabouts.

[beginthebeguin]

Yes, it can be a pleasant surprise to have a woman seek you out. I am not sure this is the same, but I once sent a 'kiss' to my current novia on a dating website in November of 2010. I did not get a response from her until March 2011. Personally I think she forgot all about my first advance entirely. I had to remind her months later that I had done it and she did not remember my expressed interest then.
Yes, indeed a pleasant surprise.

[quelindo]

Hey guys, hah I sure was being quite swept away with Naty.  I still am and we're still talking and I like it, but I did kind of do a smart thing and take a few steps back also.  She truly is one of the more beautiful women I think I've ever seen, but I can't let that overly influence me, nor can I let myself act like a total fool because she says the sexiest and most passionate things to me.

I also consider that she's been single for a few months, and while she does genuinely seem to like me I'm also no idiot.  She was in a long-term relationship so...just have to think things through.  I am visiting Miami soon, but I also have kept my head on straight.  I've had my single fun and accomplished some things I wanted over the last year, so I'm ready to meet a beautiful girl I really like and dream to travel and see the world.  My parents are going to move to Panama within a year or two also! Naty invited me to Colombia this Summer, but obviously we'll see how things work out first.  I think being a redhead and some of the things she probably thinks about me based on being "facebook friends" for a year and seeing various silly girls give me attention...I'm some type of novelty to her (like how she's kind of a novelty to me, exotic, etc and it makes me extremely attracted).  I've said things like, "I don't care at all about material possessions" Or "If you find a woman who truly loves you, even when you have nothing, you will always be the richest man in the world."  She seems to be on board with that mindset, but I absolutely want to make sure I never give a woman the time of day who simply wants me for money or anything other than me.  I know that's idealistic, but I'm a good guy and I'll do my best to find true love.  I think Latina women can be a great fit for me, but maybe she's not the one.  Maybe she is though.  Plenty of time and plenty of women so we'll see!

I've certainly enjoyed improving my Spanish, getting to know Naty better, learning the culture, and meeting you good folks here.  I will keep at it!  Don't get me wrong, I really like Naty but I also have been pushing back.  She wasn't too happy I didn't do anything special for Valentine's Day but she had been busy and sent me a "Happy Valentine's Day Mi Amor" text message then didn't respond after, and if she ignores me or doesn't write back a few times I just forget about her and go on about my business.  She gets busy w/ casting calls and blah for some type of lower level modeling, being a filler at events in Miami, etc.  Very much the fast life type of girl, but I must admit I like women like that and I know it's stupid.

KC

[JWR]

Mr. "Fortune favors the bold"
Did you go down this weekend and see your fantasy in person yet???
What are you waiting for?  One thing about a chat mate.....you can make them into anybody you want in your head without ever screwing up the image by actually meeting them.....

[htown]

Sounds pretty good so far.  Let us know how it goes.

[V_Man]

Just go and meet her as soon as practical and everything will be much clearer for you. 

[quelindo]

Well, I honestly pissed her off or I would have gone to visit this weekend.  I really like her, this particular girl, but I also do realize there are tons of beautiful Latina women and clearly the fact that she bears a striking resemblance to my celebrity fantasy - Sofia Vergara probably doesn't hurt.  I love her personality, but I also got a dose of reality from this board and other places.


She's been jealous from the start, which is expected, but I don't think I realized how much it might have bothered her because she wouldn't come out and say anything directly.  The problem is for me, I'm so used to American women and she's the first Colombian woman I know.  I play it cold as ice with American women, because they are so restrained, lacking of passion, guarded, and play games.

I did the same with her to a lesser extent, but I don't think it goes over well.  She texted me "Happy Valentine's Day Mi Amor" on Valentine's Day and I hit her back with something sweet and then asked her a question if there was a good time to call her, and she never answered...so I just blew her off.  I don't know if that sounds like an [snip] thing to do but if American women don't answer a txt I just let them contact me if they wish.  I don't think that is the same with a Colombian girl  and in her defense she was pretty busy.

So we talked after Valentine's Day and she was sad because "she wanted me to make it special for her ".  Well, we talked again and things were good last week and she sent me a picture "solo para ti" - not naked, just sexy (I don't like women that send naked pics too early).

Over the weekend I must have really pissed her off.  I can understand though.  Nothing too bad Friday but all these stupid girls hit me up on Facebook because I think they see I like this Colombian girl and they're jealous or whatever.  I suppose I enjoy attention (love it, what can I say) and so I kind of vaguely flirt back but clearly emphasize I like Naty.  I wasn't buying all the way into her because I'm just so used to these cold fake American women showing interest then suddenly stopping once I give them undivided attention.  Well, Saturday I reunited with 2 old college friends and we drank way too much.  She was out clubbing herself, but I'm not a jealous type although I worry about an ex-bf of hers.  I texted her something sweet, and didn't realize it was 5AM.  She wasn't too fond of that LOL.  She didn't even respond since then actually but I saw her say to her friend "Lies People Always Tell: "Mi Amor en 5 estoy ahi!!!!!"  I really didn't say anything too untoward but she was probably wondering why I was up at 5AM and thinking I was with some other girl.

So we haven't spoken since then and it's Wednesday.  I probably should have handled the situation differently.  I at first really didn't know she was even mad so sent an ambiguous text Sun night and apologized if I said anything stupid.  No response.  Monday late I txted that I was sorry I upset her, and that I was thinking of her.  Tuesday, she posts a picture on her Facebook which was obviously her getting food at freaking Wendy's with her loser ex-boyfriend.  She obviously did that to send a message, and I don't know if that's to make me jealous or to tell me to go [snip] myself and she doesn't want to talk to me anymore.  She is still single on there, as is he, and I don't think she's trying to be with him.  I think it was to make me jealous but maybe it's just the Colombian non-confrontational way of saying, "I don't like you anymore."

I don't think that's true because she seemed to really really like me, and I seem to be the idiot that didn't believe it was genuine.  So, perhaps I messed things up with her, and I can understand because I could squelch these chicks hitting me up and staying out until 5AM partying, and I could pursue her more but I wanted to feel confident she was genuinely interested and I wasn't going to fall for this girl then just get played like many American women do.

I sent her a little longer note on Facebook saying I was sorry I had been acting that way and that she's the only Colombian woman I know and I'm used to terrible American women.  That I think we have plenty of 'amor' between us but just need to communicate and if she knew me a little better she would understand me.  Said some extremely sweet things and that I don't want to talk to any other girls...so ball is in her court.

I have no clue what to do because of the cultural aspects and just women in general being crazy.  If she's done, that's fine I'll just go find another one frankly but I really do like her.  Actually, I find myself thinking about her constantly damnit!  She got me =/ so...what does she want from me?  Is she not interested now, or does she want me to chase her or do something here??  I'd appreciate your advice from experiences with Colombianas.  She's a typically very happy, funny, passionate Costena.  She and I are both on Facebook and she didn't delete me or anything but has updated her stuff with a picture of her tanning for instance so it's like...yah she's obviously ignoring me.

No clue - I'm not against moving on either it's no problem to me I just hate being in the middle is all.  I feel like if she did really like me, she still does, she just is angryyyy.  Eh??

LOL Thanks and sorry my posts are so long

[Bob_S]

Wait a sec.  Did I count right?  You apologized 3 times?  And she's still giving you the silent treatment?  Dude, sounds like she's lost respect for you and has gone back to her ex.  You've been dumped.  And if you haven't, she's playing games.  And do you really want a woman who plays those kinds of games?  Forget her.  Move on.  Plenty of fish in the sea and blah blah blah.

[beginthebeguin]

Do yourself a big favor. Dump all relationships that start on social websites. And if you really want to boost your self-esteem dump Facebook altogether. You don't need it to romance a Colombiana and in fact it just complicates matters. 

[quelindo]

Agreed, that's accurate on both parts.  I'm just going to forget about that girl frankly, as she hasn't been single long enough that I'd want to invest anything seriously into it.

I'm glad I came here to get a dose of reality LOL!  I honestly would love to meet a Colombiana here in the US, but I'm also open to other Latina women.  I think just the culture in general would be great and I speak decent Spanish so I'll just go for it.


I did meet a cute El Salvadoran girl recently also but I'm still definitely interested in pursuing a Colombian or Venezuelan girl.  Not that particular one though, she was honestly not that intelligent which I understand but she was just physically exactly what I want so I tried to rationalize.  At least I realize what I was mentally doing haha, but I really agree the social networking is mostly bull[snip] and you make good points.

[robert angel]

Sounds like it's time to move on, although you don't seem ready to and you never really seemed ready to go visit her physically. From the git go, the word that stood out the most to me here was "infatuation".

 
From what I gather, some Colombian women might seem clueless regarding many things in USA guy's minds, but they're very computer savvy. I bet she's already sent friends in as 'ringers' to see where you're head (both of them) really is. She's scoping you out and taking measure, while you both shop and test the waters.  Our typical mindset probably seems really weird to them as well. Sounds like you're fishing for marlin using a trout rig.

 
Facebook can really be a double edged sword and it doesn't seem that what you have (or had) is too real. I wonder why she didn't give you a 'good time to call her' --that merits a big 'hmmm' in my book. Just my two bits, from the outside looking in.

 
Like I said before, Miami, South Beach in particular, is a great place, with a lot of eye candy to see--a fun place to vacation in. Definitely a great place for photographers too. It's best to have a running mate there--another guy as a 'partner in crime' so to speak, but if I were solo--a single guy, I still wouldn't mind going it alone--I know I'd strike something up--that place was made for spontaneous combustion.

[JimD]

There's got to be dozens of reggaeton clubs in Houstan. You will find plenty of colombianas there.

[Gato4Astrid]

So we talked after Valentine's Day and she was sad because "she wanted me to make it special for her ".  Well, we talked again and things were good last week and she sent me a picture "solo para ti" - not naked, just sexy (I don't like women that send naked pics too early).

How do you know that you are the only person she sent the photo to?  Psychology, it is very defensive sentence.