Cautious... but hopeful.

[Jedironin]

^ I hear ya... I'm just so worn out with the weed-out process... *sigh*  And yet, I truly do want someone special...

[z_k_g]

^ I hear ya... I'm just so worn out with the weed-out process... *sigh*  And yet, I truly do want someone special...

Part of the process!

There are very few short cuts or magic bullets (no pun intended).

It took me weeding thru 300 young pinays; months of chatting and emailing, but it was worth every minute of that time!!

It will definitely teach you patience!!

You can always go to straight to Cebu, Manila or Angeles City and try your luck with the bar girls!  You may find a short timer who is looking for a Kano to marry!  Check out Harry the Horses website!!

If you believe that hookers make great wives, then you can cut that search down to hours!!  

Zulu

[Jedironin]

Okay... where's the *facepalm* smiley?!  LOL

I'm not in that much of a rush... really!   

Trust me, with all the fakes, scammers and "others" I've encountered, I'm going to make darned-sure the one I really get interested in is genuine.

[robert angel]

Re:

>>I've also been reading up about the ladies getting homesick... I am not sure how I would feel about taking a lady away from everything she knows to bring her to the US...    Obviously others have worked that out okay, so there is hope!<<

My wife lives, eats, breaths and sleeps with thoughts of her family back home in heart and mind. She is putting 3 siblings through college and one through parochial high school. She's paid her parents medical expenses, including operations. Bought them a new  computer, refrigerator, sewing machine, etc, etc...

She still covers a fair amount of our house hold bills here with her money form her work and is quick to reach for the tab when we eat out, or if I insist on paying--she pays the tip.

That said--I was very, very worried that she'd be horrifically homesick once she got here and I made all kinds of plans. I was ready to get pay for Filipino cable TV channels, for starters.

She said 'No thanks, honey". There's a TON of Filipino TV and they like the Korean soaps--all available for free on line, as she gradually found out. If I hear another Youtube or other video from the Filipina phenom singer 'Charice' I will choke...

She threw her self into learning to cook some American style dishes, and sometimes the results were really, really hilarious, but she now does a pretty good job with Italian dishes as well and makes a mean chicken casserole.

I got her subscriptions to magazines to keep her busy before she was able to work (she REALLY wanted to work)--ala Readers Digest, Good House Keeping, Ladies Home Journal, Hustler--(ooops--not that one) and she told me not to renew them--she really didn't read them that much. I definitely decided NOT to subscribe to Cosmopolitan magazine...

She did find some authors, like Nicholas Sparks, whose books she likes--she's read them all and now is stepping it up a notch, with Pat Conroy's books--like 'The Water is Wide". That's helped her vocabulary a lot.

But I think the most important thing--her 'safety blanket' if you will, has been her knowing that she can pick up the phone and call home. At first, we used a Hong Kong based phone company called Owtel, then we switched to one which cost less than half--called Startec--plus we get less 'dropped' calls now. I'm sure there's other companies out there as well.

Some people have had luck and a lot less in cost, with magic jack, or skype, but that requires a computer, which usually requires a land line, from what I gather. She covers the overseas phone bill out of an account we set aside for that kind of thing--which acts as somewhat as a control--but she knows she can call when when she really wants--needs to.

I am trying to get info on how to use a cell phone at her family's home in the province as some form of conduit to get internet on the lap top we sent--but the reception for a cell phone out there is spotty at best. Maybe we can magnify the signal--some antennae--I don't know yet.

It's still a dream for us to be able to get an internet connection and use yahoo and webcam with her parents and family--but they have no landlines there and as said, the cell phone signal is weak to non existent. Sometimes, they even have to go walk around outside when we call, to get a better signal.

But when we were 'courting' and when her siblings are at school in the big city of Davao, yahoo and using the web cam and speaking in real time, is a real comfort for my wife and considering it's free--a technological marvel as well. I'd encourage anyone with challenges hooking up to yahoo--and there are a number of people in that boat--to call their internet provider--or enlist any other help source they can. My wife and I logged thousands of hours chatting and on cam and we set the yahoo, to record--to 'archive' every chat--which helped with our USCIS paperwork.

I think it's natural to worry about how she'll adjust, but usually in the end, they do a lot better than we expect..

[thekfc]

Some people have had luck and a lot less in cost, with magic jack, or skype, but that requires a computer, which usually requires a land line, from what I gather.

No land line is required - just a computer & internet connection.

[robert angel]

Yea, Kfc--the weak to non existent  cell phone connection wayyy out in the boondocks (no landlines) is the problem--the reason why we can't hook into the internet there.

They've even tried running different kinds of wires up the wall and to the roof, connected to the cell phone, w/ little or no gain.

Once in a while, we see 'devices' that promise to 'amp up' your cell phones ability to pull in a signal (usually mostly hype, seemingly) and some cell phones do a better job that others at pulling in signals, but this is a hill we haven't gotten over yet. There's one room in the house that seems to get the best signal sometimes--they leave a cell phone on the window sill there.

Even if we do hear of some way it can be done, I have to figure out how and who to contact in the RP to make the cell phone effectively a lap top computer modem.

Any and all ideas--input here are more than welcome, otherwise, we very rarely get to chat and see my in-laws online--it's just poor to fair sound quality phone calls

[Jedironin]

Robert- about the cell phone issue, did you see my reply here:
http://www.planet-love.com/forum/index.php?topic=5624.msg69116#msg69116

Ron

[Dave H]

I don't think any thread stays on topic 

True thekfc,

I pretty much see to that! 

Dave

[jm21-2]

Have you tried the different types of satellite internet? I don't know if they have them in the RP but here they're pretty common. A lot of people in my area live way out in the boonies and it's one of the few ways to get a good connection. There's one called direcduo through directv as well as a bunch of small microwave dish providers. Looks like Directv might have cut their internet service but I'm sure there are others. Seems liek there might be something like that in the phils.

http://www.pinoytechblog.com/archives/smart-to-offer-satellite-broadband

EDIT:
On Jedironon's problem, have you tried plenty of fish? It's not technically an international dating site, but I met a very interesting Chinese girl on it at one point. I ended up hooking up with my fiance instead but I was tempted to visit China for that girl. I believe I made a thread on her debating that point. It's free and you might have some luck. Doesn't hurt to try.

[Capstone]

Have you tried the different types of satellite internet?

I have and all I can say is don't waste your money. Satellite internet connectivity is in no way, shape or form a broadband connection - it is better than dialup but not by much. Plus you can't use a VPN with it because it is not a constant connection but rather sends & receives data in intermittent packets. I tried it out and cancelled it after 1 month of service. If you are used to using a true broadband connection then satellite will drive you mad.

[robert angel]

Yea--getting an internet connection is the problem. The nearest internet cafe is at least 20 minutes away, where they have telephone lines. Maybe vonage--maybe some kind of dish, although Capstone says the satellite situation's a pain--so  I dunno...

[Jedironin]

Okay- next question... How firmly do you make a "plan" and stick with it?

I am most familiar with Japanese culture, compared to the other Asian countries, so I would like to "focus" on finding a Japanese lady. However... I'm not getting many replies from JapanCupid, or Japanese ladies on DIA, but I already find myself in casual conversation via email with 3, maybe soon, 4 Philipino ladies. They do match what I'm looking for, besides country of origin, and so far they're all pretty nice and good with English. I can't say at this point, of course, that any of them are "not" what I'm looking for, but that brings me back to my "Plan A". Just keep my options open, I guess...

No, I don't play games with ladies, and I won't lie to any of them.

[Capstone]

Jedi,

I am a firm believer in choosing a lady from a culture that you are very comfortable with - if that means waiting it out a while until the right opportunity presents itself then so be it. Don't be in any hurry to settle for something other than what you are comfortable with. Once you marry a woman you are stuck with her culture for life, so make sure that you choose wisely.

With that being said, there would certainly not be anything wrong with you investigating Filipino culture a bit to see if it is something that may interest you and is something that you may be comfortable with. But at this point since it is obvious that you are very attractive to the Japanese culture, I would stay the course for now and see what may present itself in the future.

Just remember to have patience and the guy who crosses the finish line first is not always the winner in this game.

[Jedironin]

Thank ye, Cap'n, steady on course, aye! 

I've only been chatting with these couple of ladies for a day or two, and I always like to make new friends. I'll just try to be sure to keep it on a "friendly" level for a while. I definitely don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. Darned hard to resist an attractive, intelligent lady who can actually carry on a conversation and answers my questions!  hehe  (I've gotten too jaded and cynical with all the scammers I've run into over the years.)

Oh- since the beginning stages will probably involve a lot of emails, what are the best methods people have found for keeping track of everything? Start a Word document for each lady and copy the to/from messages into it?

[thekfc]

For emails, just make a folder for each lady & save the emails in it & when it time - just print directly from your email so that your email address as well as the person who sent/receive the email is also showing. 

If you are using any IM,  remember to edit your preference to save all chat messages - sometime by default they are not set to save all messages.

[Bob_S]

Okay- next question... How firmly do you make a "plan" and stick with it?
I am most familiar with Japanese culture, compared to the other Asian countries, so I would like to "focus" on finding a Japanese lady. However... I'm not getting many replies from JapanCupid, or Japanese ladies on DIA,

Seriously, if it's what you really want, I'd say stick with it for at least a year or several.  Plan for a sightseeing trip, maybe time it for the next Tokyo Speed Dating event and reserve yourself a place.  Japanese are naturally shy, so don't expect them to come flooding at you like the women of other countries.  A non-response doesn't necessarily mean non-interest.  But demonstrating your sincerity by letting them know you are planning a trip will set you above all the otaku sitting in their momma's basement contacting girls while dreaming of their anime fantasy tsundere.

[Jeff S]

Make some friends, both male and female without the big relationship pressure - maybe even married women interested in practicing their English. Everyone knows someone.

http://www.japanesefriendfinder.com/

[robert angel]

Re:

>>Make some friends, both male and female without the big relationship pressure - maybe even married women interested in practicing their English. Everyone knows someone<<

That's great advice. Back before Yahoo international rooms pretty much became wastelands, I got a lot of excellent information from older ladies, some who were married home makers, just passing time. They gave me insights about life and culture in their homelands that I probably would never have gained on dating, marriage finding sites--as on those places, people tend to have an agenda--a 'role' if you will. We did help each other with language and they enjoyed learning about common American 'slang' quite a bit and I learned some basic, useful words

People I met outside of the typical singles sites gave me insights as to the different sorts of girls around them and how to avoid certain pitfalls.

These people eventually offered their friendship and expanded my contacts in their nations and they included not just Asia, but Europe, Central and South America.

I think if you approach things like that, trying to make and keep friendships along the way, it's sort of like working your way up a tree and the further up you get, the more the branches open up and the chances of finding some 'tasty fruit' become considerably greater.

[Jedironin]

Thanks folks, much appreciated! I'll start working toward these things.

[robert angel]

Lemme tell ya'll a story bout a man named Jed, he came into Planet love and he learned things as he read. Then one day he was looking at some sweets, and before too long, he had found him one for keeps.....A girl that is, bright eyes, from afar...

[Bob_S]

A girl that is, bright eyes, from afar...

dark eyes, green tea...   

[Jedironin]

Damn it... now I have that song stuck in my head... 


I'll just start humming "Girl from Ipenema", that'll get rid of it! 

[Bob_S]

The whole song (from Bob & Robert)...
Lemme tell ya'll a story bout a man named Jed,
he came into Planet love and he learned things as he read.
Then one day he was looking at some sweets,
and before too long, he had found him one for keeps.....

A girl that is, dark eyes, green tea...

Well, as ever'body knows, ol' Jed's the debonair,
PL said "Jed, git on over there,"
said "Meiji Jingu is the place you ought to see."
So he loaded up his pack and moved to Roppongi

Hills, that is.  Onsen pools, cosplay girls.


Yes, as a matter of fact, I do have too much time on my hands.   

[Jedironin]

LOL

Styx- "Too Much Time On My Hands", great song! 

[robert angel]

Man o' live, Bob_S,

You nailed that tune--you ought to rework tunes for real! Great job and good chuckles there!!