Here's my situation. Insights will be much appreciated.

[alex915]

So weddings are always a good place to meet a nice mexican girl, first of all because you will spot the single ones really fast, second because even the shy ones will assist because of the family and third, if you like a more lively one just pick the ones that are dancing the night away

Oh yeah!  When I go down to Mexico and there's a party going on, man, I have the time of my life!  Dancing, drinking, eating, talking.  It's just great!  Now I'm gonna have to take more trips more often!

Girls over here are usually somewhat intimidated by the gueritos (yes, they are considered very attractive) and we don't have much contact with negritos so they usually get approached or avoided depending on the personality of the woman. Your looks would only get in the way if that particular woman happens to have very specific tastes I would guess.

IV, I guess let me ask you about Mexican girls.  Here in the States not a lot of women seem to have a problem with my shaved head (some in fact love it and request to rub it!) but I don't know what the culture is like in Mexico regarding this look.  I'd really appreciate your insights on this.  Also, let me look for a decent, recent pic of me so that you can see how I look with my shaved head...

I don't know about your likes or dislikes so I have no idea if I know of anyone that you might be interested in.

Basically, I like good-looking women; but don't we all?   

I have two deal-breakers:

• Women who smoke:  I don't smoke and I don't want to kiss someone who tastes like cigarettes.  My dad does smoke so I'm tolerant of friends and acquaintances who do but, my partner cannot smoke.
• Women with children:  Based on a past experience, I do not wish to explore this option again.  Also, I want to start a family of my own soon.

Physical features:

• Hair:  I prefer long, black hair.  Castaño (brown) is okay too.  But it has to be long.
• Build:  Slender but curvy.  A few extra pounds are okay, provided they're in the right places.
• Skin:  I prefer tan.  However, if a nice güerita happens to have everything else I'm looking for, that's cool.
• Height:  Between 5'0" (1.50m) and 5'9" (1.75m) is what seems to work for me.  I'm 6'1" (1.85m)
• Age:  I would prefer her to be between 21 and 26 but I'm willing to explore other ranges provided that they have a mature character for the 18-20 set or that they still have that playfulness for the 27-29 set.

and of course, she has to be pretty.

Other factors:

• Education:  Like I mentioned in my earlier post, this is not that important to me.  Sure, if she has a degree, that's great!  But if she doesn't, that okay too.  I'm more interested in her character.  Hey, my mom only made it to 3rd grade but she, along with my dad (who only made it to 6th) were able to raise a son and have him become the man he is today.
• Language:  If she speaks English, that will speed things along great.  If she doesn't, I speak fluent Spanish.  She will, however, need to be willing and able to learn English eventually.
• Religion:  Although Catholic by upbringing, I consider myself more spiritual than religious.  I'm actually an amalgamation of several philosophies.  I'm not really a fan of organized religion.  If she's a devout Catholic/Christian, we're probably not going to be compatible long-term.
• Children:  She has to like kids and be interested in having some in the near future.  I would like to have 2 or 3 children within the next 10 years or so.
• Sex:  She has to be into it!    You know, something nice and balanced.  Not a cold fish with no libido but also not a raging nymphomaniac!

So basically, I'm looking for a pretty, young woman who has a good head on her shoulders, who is good with kids and wants 2 or 3 of her own, who wants to be part of a good home and become my partner as we travel on this wonderful adventure called Life.

The needle in the haystack.

[Ray]

IV, meet Alex.

Alex, meet IV.

  

[Jeff S]

So basically, I'm looking for a pretty, young woman who has a good head on her shoulders, who is good with kids and wants 2 or 3 of her own, who wants to be part of a good home and become my partner as we travel on this wonderful adventure called Life.

Very unusual set of specifications. Good thing you're looking outside the US because so few here fit the bill these days.

Just a small point: Lots of education doesn't always mean lots of career ambition, nor does little education mean little career ambition. You can make a big mistake connecting the two.

[Researcher]

    Alex, you are waaaayyyy ahead of the game because you know what you want.Finding it really isn't as hard as you think when you go outside the US.Character is more important than many things.A person's education level doesn't mean a whole lot when it comes to relationships.To me it is pretty much window dressing.

    Being a Spanish speaker is a huge advantage for you.Your objective now? Meeting women and lots of them.Get out there and mingle.Agencies, weddings, networking with freinds and family, ....its all good.


     Researcher

[CeeTeeEnn]

Jeez.. and I thought I was the insatiably choosy guy on P-L! No, Alex - I commend your criteria and wish you all the best in your search. My own wish list isn't a million miles away from yours as it happens.

There are minor differences. If a woman smokes, I wouldn't automatically consider it a deal breaker provided she was cutting down and trying to quit. I think most women who smoke will quit once they are with a partner who encourages and helps them to do so. However, if a woman displays a stroppy attitude by declaring that she smokes "because she enjoys it" and "nobody is gonna tell her what to do" - she's history.

I am also big on education. I'm not a PhD snob but I very much appreciate that quantum of intelligence in a woman that prompts her to look beyond the superficial, beyond the crowd, and think for herself - whether she has a college degree or not. I believe that such women will gravitate strongly towards having a college education and career with it once they are given the opportunity, if not in their own countries then abroad. But, as Jeff reminds us, education and career ambition do not necessarily follow or imply eachother.

In other regards I guess I am less fussy than you. However, i confess to having two additional fetishes. One is music - a decent taste in rock and metal is not just a nice-to-have extra for me because of what I do. And the other is height - I seriously prefer tall women.  I'm not sure why exactly but a woman who is fit, model-gorgeous and 5'5 will never win my attention away from a woman who might be plain-looking and overweight but stands 5'10; it's no contest. If it wasn't for these two points I would have probably taken the Asian option years ago.

Either way, Jeff's quote "Good thing you're looking outside the US" chimes a very strong chord with my own experiences here in the UK.

[Researcher]

   CeeTeeEnn I have to disagree with you on the smoking thing.Never assume that you can change someone after you are married.There are plenty of non-smoking women out there to choose from.

   I also wouldn't assume anything about a woman because of an education.There are plenty of motivated go getter types that didn't have the opportunity to go to college.Speaking as a man who was married to and had many relationships with educated women, it doesn't mean a whole lot.


   Researcher


     

[CeeTeeEnn]

I agree with you, Researcher, it is disingenuous to reach any conclusions about a woman's intelligence purely from the number of letters after her name. Nonetheless, if a woman didn't have to opportunity to go to college, I would expect the reasons for this to become clear after the first few dates; likewise her willingness (or otherwise) to continue her education if new opportunities should present themselves. Everyone has the right to choose a partner according to whatever criteria they see fit; in my case I rate a woman's intelligence and education over and above most things and shall choose my partner accordingly.

In regard to smoking, I see this as a good compatibility test early on in the courtship process. I don't believe you can change anyone before marriage or after; a woman can only change herself and that's if she wants to. I believe that if a woman goes on a date with a guy who doesn't smoke and doesn't like it, but otherwise they get along very well and both parties want to explore things further, the onus is then on her to begin the process of quitting and also on him to show understanding and positive support to assist this process.

Of course in the case of a guy wanting to marry a women during a 1 week trip to Colombia, such a process is almost impossible to assess. However, in the case of a more drawn out courtship process, such a process can reveal a woman's true committment towards the fledgeling relationship. If it becomes clear early on in the dating process that the woman cannot be bothered to quit smoking, or worse - reacts negatively to a guy's efforts to encourage her to preserve her health, then he has all the excuse he needs to look elsewhere.

[Researcher]

   You have some very good points CeeTeeEnn but I have found a woman's character, how affectionate she is and her overall attitude about life trumps her education level.I am attracted to an intelligent woman but that's just icing on the cake.

   As far as smoking, I guess that is a personal preference.I agree with Alex on this subject.I don't care anything about "kissing an ash tray" and there are plenty of non-smoking women out there to choose from.But to each his own.


   Researcher

[Dave H]

but as I matured, I came to the realization that slender, curvy women with long, black hair and tanned skin was what really rocked my boat.  

Hear, hear!  

[Dave H]

Robert's shortest post ever!!!!  

Zulu

His ribbon must have run dry!  Anyone else remember typewriters? 

Rob would have over 10,000 posts, if he would put each paragraph in a new post. (like me)  

Dave

[Dave H]

 For example, since you are an engineer, you would probably ultimately be more comfortable with a woman who has some education: a HS graduate at least, preferably with some college or even a college degree herself.  

"Engineer"   Hmmm...my unmarried Filipina sister-in-law is an engineer...and a registered nurse.  

I don't really care much for educational levels.  Actually, in my experience, I've had the most problems with women who have been overly ambitious with their educational levels.

Scratch that idea!  

I like motorcycles too.  They're a big part of my life.

Same here! After my stokes I was thinking of switching to a 3 wheeler. But I balance fine on 2 wheels...as long as I don't stand up!  

Dave

[CeeTeeEnn]

I also agree, Researcher, that kissing and ashtray is no turn-on. However, women sometimes get into smoking for all the wrong reasons, such as peer pressure, and deep-down are looking to quit. In these cases a positive guiding influence from a non-smoking date can be the catalyst they need to turn their lives around. I dated two Latinas who smoked when they met me but gave up gradually with my support and subsequently expressed sincere gratitude towards me; in one instance I gave her an Allan Carr book for her birthday and I thoroughly recommend his methods.

Sure enough there are plenty of non-smoking women to choose from in many countries, and some may even cite a woman's smoking in the first place as signs of underlying psychological flaws that make her worth avoiding. However, i like to take a more positive and forgiving line, perhaps based on my own experiences but also the belief that most women want to have children someday (I only date childless women) and so realise almost universally that quitting is something they will have to do anyway. There are of course women who are hardened smokers, be it for social reasons or as a means of asserting a rebellious identity, and they won't quit no matter what support is provided as a matter of preserving their twisted pride. However, such women tend to end up dating other smokers as few non-smokers will put up with them for long (in my case, one date at most) and - as you rightly allude - certainly don't need to when dating abroad.

Regarding education, I confess that for me a woman's intelligence, wisdom and comparative intellectual maturity define who she is. Granted, these qualities do not necessarily on their own identify a women as a suitable partner. But a women who has no serious interest in reading, learning, exploring new ideas and indeed putting her intellect to use in a worthy career, cannot ever become my soulmate as she would never be able to appreciate those same qualities which are part and parcel of my own identity. Too often I have dated Latinas who have had little in the way of education and/or intelect but have tried to make up for it by showering me with affection, sweetness and sexiness etc. etc. - but sadly to no avail. Indeed, I admit that my cumulative experiences of Latin womens' intellectual and educational shortcomings have now made me question and re-assess my committment towards meeting them in the first place.

[Bob_S]

They all have mothers! And aunts and sisters and cousins and.........we're talking Mexican families here, they're huge.

Yeah, I know.  Just, the way you worded it left it waaayyy open to misinterpretation, which I had to pounce on, of course.

[michaelb]

Same here! After my stokes I was thinking of switching to a 3 wheeler. But I balance fine on 2 wheels...as long as I don't stand up!  

Dave

Dave, speaking of standing up on motorcycles.....
1. You meet the nicest people on a Honda.
2. Look closely at 1:50, she almost falls.
3. Yes, I am the 'fmichaelb' who put the comment giving her name.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WFkei4yePaw

[alex915]

First all, thank you very much for all of your insights.  Very much appreciated.

So I've told my folks about my desire to marry a girl from Mexico and they were quite happy (especially my dad; I guess his desire for grandchildren should be fulfilled in the next few years as opposed to never! ) so they're gonna ask some of our relatives back home.

I won't be limiting myself to just relatives' findings though.  I'm gonna explore other options like international dating sites, perhaps agencies and of course, recommendations from you fine folks.  Like I said, if she's cute/pretty, fits most of my criteria, is a good one and she digs guys like me, I'm game!  Send her my way!  And talking about "guys like me", here's what I look like.

What I tell ya?  Quite the looker, huh?  First one is of what I look like at work, second one is me out riding and third is me out and about.

[alex915]

Yeah, that's the thing about me:  I know exactly what I want.  Thanks to all the experiences I've had in the past (both good and bad), I've developed a very exact feeling of what I want.  A funny thing is that many of the women I've met, although they say they want a "man who knows what he wants", they get mad at you when you tell them "You're not what I'm looking for!"  

Let me add a little bit to what I meant about women with overly ambitious educational levels.  You see, when women tell me about their careers, most of them only want their degrees for the potential money that it's gonna earn them, whether they enjoy their jobs or not.  If that's your thing, that's cool.  However for me, I want someone who is (or will be) studying something that they really like and that will make them happy.  I'm a pretty intelligent man.  I could have been a lawyer or a doctor and made a very nice living but you know what?  They were things (law and medicine) that didn't interest me.  I preferred to get my degree in something that I liked and was good at instead of getting a degree in something that did not interest me much, just for the earning potential.

[alex915]

"Engineer"   Hmmm...my unmarried Filipina sister-in-law is an engineer...and a registered nurse.

Well, my degree is in engineering but I do Information Technology now.  Eventually, I would like to get my MSIT but all in due time.  Hey, if she's cute and fits most of my criteria, you know what to do!

Same here! After my stokes I was thinking of switching to a 3 wheeler. But I balance fine on 2 wheels...as long as I don't stand up!  

Ha!  I'm gonna try to ride for as long as the Good Lord lets me.  When I get old and can't balance 2 wheels anymore, I wanna be like Piney (from Sons of Anarchy) and ride me a 3-wheeler too!

Nice ride you got there!  How many CCs? 

[alex915]

Dave, speaking of standing up on motorcycles.....
1. You meet the nicest people on a Honda Kawasaki.

There.  Fixed it fer ya! 

Ha!  Just messing with you.  Like I tell my friends.  "Bikes are like girls.  I love them all!  But especially the pretty ones, regardless of make!"

[michaelb]

Hey, co'm, that was their advertising slogan back then. Never had a Kawasaki, between me and my brother and my dad, we had 1. Honda 50 (although a different model than the ones in the video, ours didn't have the knee guards, 2. Honda 90, 3. Suzuki 185, 4 Suzuki 250, Suzuki 500, 5 Suzuki 1000. Daddy had a fairing (with both a regular radio and a CB in it), bags and sissy bar on the 1000 and used to go 300, 400 miles on a weekend, often with my little sister (who was about 12 at the time) on the back. Often as not, she'd be sound asleep leaning on the bar when they'd come rolling back at 3 or 4 AM.  According to my brother, the 500, a two stroke twin, would go 140mph, I never had it over 110 . Haven't touched one since 1983....don't know, just lost the feeling for them, I guess.

Say, about your situation, why don't you just go buy some groceries at the nearest Fiesta? Bound to be plenty of them there....only problem I foresee is if you get involved with one who is here WOP (with out papers)....probably easier to import a new one than to 'legalize' one who is already here but without permission.

[Jeff S]

Hey Alex, don't let Dave convince you that's his real ride. He left it for me to watch while he's overseas.

[z_k_g]

So basically, I'm looking for a pretty, young woman who has a good head on her shoulders, who is good with kids and wants 2 or 3 of her own, who wants to be part of a good home and become my partner as we travel on this wonderful adventure called Life.

The needle in the haystack.

No....a Filippina...hehe

Zulu (Asian Board Recruiter)

[alex915]

Say, about your situation, why don't you just go buy some groceries at the nearest Fiesta? Bound to be plenty of them there....only problem I foresee is if you get involved with one who is here WOP (with out papers)....probably easier to import a new one than to 'legalize' one who is already here but without permission.

Well, the thing is that although quite a few girls are attracted to me, the ones I'm attracted to have already been spoiled with the misdirected feminism (or feminazism, as I like to call it) that is prevalent here in the States, are already attached and/or already have kids, things that I am not interested in.

That's why I'm looking to LA to see if I can find me a good one who does not believe in being "more equal" than me.  You know, someone who is actually looking for a partner.  Not a freaking tool to use and abuse.

[alex915]

Hey Alex, don't let Dave convince you that's his real ride. He left it for me to watch while he's overseas.

Hahaha!  Man, reminds me that I need to look me for a good frame to start what should the project to keep me busy for a few years...

[jm21-2]

Finding a girl who is at her job because she loves it, rather than for the money, might be a bit tricky. Especially in poorer countries I would think pay factors in a lot more than here and jobs are more limited.

But you can find plenty of educated girls in other countries who are not particularly spoiled and may very well like the idea of settling down, possibly quitting work. I know in Asia that would not be particularly hard to find. If I was going to have a house-wife I would much rather one who had experienced what a career is like and turned it down, rather than someone who was forced into being a house-wife due to her lack of education or experience. I think someone who's had a career, didn't like it, wanted to give it up for staying at home, and was fine with having a less luxurious lifestyle since the family would make less, would be a good choice. I am not a big fan of house-wives but my fiance will probably stay at home, at least for a while, after she gets here. Knowing that she knows that having a career is hard work and respects what I do makes that a lot easier for me. I handle a lot of divorces and it's almost always the women who have never had a career who are the most demanding and spoiled. They don't know how hard their husbands work and as a result have much less respect for him. Further, they don't appreciate staying home and may even view it as a negative thing (like they are forced to stay at home). To her, you may be perpetuating her dependence to your advantage. To a career woman who wants to stay at home you're fulfilling her dream.

[z_k_g]

I am not a big fan of house-wives but my fiance will probably stay at home, at least for a while, after she gets here. Knowing that she knows that having a career is hard work and respects what I do makes that a lot easier for me. I handle a lot of divorces and it's almost always the women who have never had a career who are the most demanding and spoiled. They don't know how hard their husbands work and as a result have much less respect for him.

Very interesting perspective that I really agree with. Further, the lack of respect grows and slowly destroys the relationship.

I always wonder how a housewife can utter the words "My work is harder than yours!" 

(I may catch heat for this) 
I have a huge amount of respect for women that nurture and raise our children, the work is very critical to the development of healthy children.  But its not hard work; its difficult at times, challenging, frustrating even thankless, but not "hard".  An 18 yo girl can raise a child, but can she work a 8 hour shift at a coal mine plant and pull a double shift?

I've raised 4 kids from infant to teen/young adulthood.  I've also built two companies into successful businesses doing physical labor and managing the books and employees and the projects. 

Raising kids is a difficult, but a cakewalk in comparison to work.

Zulu