Yes, another new guy

[Jaystone]

Hello Everyone,

After lurking on this site for the past few months, I have decided to jump into the foreign bride pool.  Let me tell you a little about myself:

I am a 44 year old divorced Catholic african-american male hailing from the midwest.  I was married for 5 years, have been divorced for the last 3 and I have no children.  I work in the telecommunications industry and I also have a small landscape business.  I have decided to marry a foreign bride for all the reasons we are here in the first place so I won't have to go there.  As you see beneath my name, I have decided to seek out a Filipino beauty as a wife.  From what I have seen personally and what I have seen on this board, a Filipino woman is exactly what I am looking for in a soulmate- Beautiful, yet intelligent, sincere and gentle, cultured, yet passionate, and above all loyal yet independent.

My "ideal" Filipino wife would be 28-40 years old, 1-child OK, vocational or college educated, Catholic, and wants to be employed once she comes over here.  Ideally, I would like to do a K-1 wedding to bring her here sooner to have a small church wedding and go back to the Philippines for a traditional wedding for her family-but I would not rule out the K-3 route.

I have already applied for a passport, and I plan making a trip late December during the Christmas break.  I will be looking for Mrs. Jaystone on a couple of websites as soon as my photos have been approved.  I am nervous and excited about all this at the same time.  I have never tried online dating before and I have never traveled outside of the US before other than Canada.

I will be asking a few questions in the next few weeks as I start my journey to find a bride.  If any of them sound repetitive or silly, I apologize in advance.  I have read through all the archives, but I still have a lot of unanswered questions.

I would also like to give a shout out to piglett and thekfc-Congrats on your marriages!  Your brides are beautiful and I hope I can be as fortunate in my adventure!  Your posts have been real informative and a great source of info on Filipino culture!  Ray and Robert-your posts have been great as well.  Zulu-I read from a previous post that you might go on a trip late this year...maybe we can meet up!

Thanks in advance!

Jaystone
                                   
                                     

[Dave H]

Hey Jaystone,

Welcome to P-! Good Luck and a pleasant journey!

Dave

[Jeff S]

Welcome Jaystone. We're happy to have you, and are looking forward to following your adventure. Bring on the questions, even if they've been asked before. The makeup of the regulars is always changing so often new insight is brought and the conversations heads off in new directions, even when a question is asked that has been discussed before.

Your acceptance of women with a child will make you particularly attractive to that group. Just be cautious with women who say they are divorced. There is no divorce in the Philippines and as I understand it, it can be difficult and expensive to get an annulment, if she was once married.

[Jaystone]

Hey Jaystone,

Welcome to P-! Good Luck and a pleasant journey!

Dave

Thanks-I'm gonna a need it!!!

[Jaystone]

Welcome Jaystone. We're happy to have you, and are looking forward to following your adventure. Bring on the questions, even if they've been asked before. The makeup of the regulars is always changing so often new insight is brought and the conversations heads off in new directions, even when a question is asked that has been discussed before.

Your acceptance of women with a child will make you particularly attractive to that group. Just be cautious with women who say they are divorced. There is no divorce in the Philippines and as I understand it, it can be difficult and expensive to get an annulment, if she was once married.

Thanks, Jeff.  I will be asking away!   I am still not sure whether or not a still want to have any kids of my own-this way she will already have a child.


Thanks for the tip on divorced women.   I was already aware of that fact and believe me, I will be on the lookout!


Jaystone

[william3rd]

Welcome Jaystone. We're happy to have you, and are looking forward to following your adventure. Bring on the questions, even if they've been asked before. The makeup of the regulars is always changing so often new insight is brought and the conversations heads off in new directions, even when a question is asked that has been discussed before.

Your acceptance of women with a child will make you particularly attractive to that group. Just be cautious with women who say they are divorced. There is no divorce in the Philippines and as I understand it, it can be difficult and expensive to get an annulment, if she was once married.

BTW- if the woman claims that she was a date-rape victim and got pregnant, run away fast. Shows a tendency to fabricate.

[jm21-2]

A k1 isn't faster than a K3. It's a matter of balancing out being able for her to be here after the wedding and her being able to have a big wedding with her family. If you bring her here on a k1 and marry here, it could be a few months after you get married in the US before you'd be able to travel to the PI to have the wedding there.

[z_k_g]

Zulu-I read from a previous post that you might go on a trip late this year...maybe we can meet up!

Thanks in advance!

Jaystone            

Welcome aboard Jaystone!

This is not the easiest route to take looking for a good woman to call your wife!  Over the last 9 months, I have been tested, but... with the advice from the P-L faithful and copious use of the archives, I endure!

About 98% of all of your issues have been covered in some way or another here so you are in good hands.  Read the archives!!  This means hours of study and dedicated research!  It's worth it!!

Good luck and hopefully you will find the perfect pinay for you!

I'm looking at sometime later in the year for my trip to RP...maybe staying 30 days... would love meet up!

Zulu

[thekfc]

Welcome to P-L Jaystone.
We are all here to help - just ask away.

[Bob_S]

Welcome to the quest!
Don't worry about re-hashing old questions.  When you first start out, you don't know what you don't know.  And even if the answer you need is somewhere in the archives, you can't reasonably be expected to know where it is (a [search] of your topic may result in a hundred possible postings, most of which just barely touch on what you need to know).  Read what you can, anyway.  Some of it will stick.  And when the time comes for clarification, these guys won't lead you wrong.

[Jaystone]

Welcome aboard Jaystone!

This is not the easiest route to take looking for a good woman to call your wife!  Over the last 9 months, I have been tested, but... with the advice from the P-L faithful and copious use of the archives, I endure!

About 98% of all of your issues have been covered in some way or another here so you are in good hands.  Read the archives!!  This means hours of study and dedicated research!  It's worth it!!

Good luck and hopefully you will find the perfect pinay for you!

I'm looking at sometime later in the year for my trip to RP...maybe staying 30 days... would love meet up!

Zulu


Thanks for the advice, Zulu-I have been reading these posts for months-I learn something new almost every time I log on!  Very educational.

I will be there for 10 days...who knows, depending on what Island/province maybe we'll run into each other!

[/quote]

[Jaystone]

A k1 isn't faster than a K3. It's a matter of balancing out being able for her to be here after the wedding and her being able to have a big wedding with her family. If you bring her here on a k1 and marry here, it could be a few months after you get married in the US before you'd be able to travel to the PI to have the wedding there.

Thanks for the advice...I did not realize it.    I guess I will worry about it if I am lucky enough to have that problem! 

Jaystone

[Jaystone]

Welcome to the quest!
Don't worry about re-hashing old questions.  When you first start out, you don't know what you don't know.  And even if the answer you need is somewhere in the archives, you can't reasonably be expected to know where it is (a [search] of your topic may result in a hundred possible postings, most of which just barely touch on what you need to know).  Read what you can, anyway.  Some of it will stick.  And when the time comes for clarification, these guys won't lead you wrong.

Thanks, Bob.  I will not hesitate to ask!  The tips and advice I have been reading in previous posts has been very useful.    I am about to start seeking my soulmate online and the advice I have read in previous posts has been priceless! Especially in how to spot a scammer!  The advice on that alone has already saved me a lot of heartache!!

[Jaystone]

BTW- if the woman claims that she was a date-rape victim and got pregnant, run away fast. Shows a tendency to fabricate.

Thanks, William-You don't have to tell me twice!!

[william3rd]

Thanks, William-You don't have to tell me twice!!

Sure- I actually had a few guys that had that situation. All married and all suffered infidelity and divorce- after the green card was issued of course.

DOnt be a "White Knight."  If she is letting you "rescue" her, you have the wrong girl. . . .

Good luck in your search

[Ray]

A belated welcome aboard Jaystone!

I was just curious about a couple of points you made. Was your first marriage in the Church? If so, was there an annulment granted by the Catholic Church?

You said that you preferred to marry here in a Church wedding after doing the K-1 Fiancée visa. Have you checked with your local parish to see if that can be done in 90 days after she arrives? I know that many or most jurisdictions require a minimum 6-month preparation period before marriage in the Church. But I do know of one couple here (Hi Raquel!) who was able to do it here within the 90 days with some advance preparation.

If you are planning an a small Church wedding here and then another traditional Church wedding over there, you might want to consider just doing the Church wedding in the Phils and then doing the CR-1 spouse visa. These are things to be discussed with your intended after you find each other.

Also, if there are some Filipino families in your local parish, you might want to try to get acquainted with some local Filipinos and see if that might lead to a personal introduction to some nice Filipina relatives back home.

I wish you luck in your search!

Ray

[Jaystone]

A belated welcome aboard Jaystone!

I was just curious about a couple of points you made. Was your first marriage in the Church? If so, was there an annulment granted by the Catholic Church?

You said that you preferred to marry here in a Church wedding after doing the K-1 Fiancée visa. Have you checked with your local parish to see if that can be done in 90 days after she arrives? I know that many or most jurisdictions require a minimum 6-month preparation period before marriage in the Church. But I do know of one couple here (Hi Raquel!) who was able to do it here within the 90 days with some advance preparation.

If you are planning an a small Church wedding here and then another traditional Church wedding over there, you might want to consider just doing the Church wedding in the Phils and then doing the CR-1 spouse visa. These are things to be discussed with your intended after you find each other.

Also, if there are some Filipino families in your local parish, you might want to try to get acquainted with some local Filipinos and see if that might lead to a personal introduction to some nice Filipina relatives back home.

I wish you luck in your search!

Ray

Thanks Ray for the welcome!  To answer your questions:

My first marriage was in the church.   I am in the process of getting it annulled.   I shouldn't have a problem-I am Catholic, but my ex wasn't.

I haven't checked with my church to see if a wedding could be done in 90 days.  My brother, who is a monk, concurs that it can be done with careful/advance planning, though.  I am now considering doing the spousal visa.   It may just be a lot easier to do and since it will be likely her first(and hopefully only!) marriage and will want the real one in front of her family.   I am planning for that scenario.

There aren't any Filipino couples attending my church- however, I do have some Filipino friends.   I will consider the option of asking them if they have any available relatives back home.

Thanks again for all of your advice!


Jaystone