Cali, Colombia Trip Report: March 2010

[Osa]

T minus 21 days:

I'm off to Cali Colombia in three weeks, and I'm just a bit anxious.   here's what I've accomplished so far

- passport has been renewed

- airfare has been purchased

- vacation time at work has been approved

- have cultivated friendships with a few girls

Here's what I haven't done yet:

- booked a hotel

- bought vacation clothes yet

- figured out what I'm going to tell my family about where I'll be for two weeks


here's where I'm at "relationally":

- the girl in Cali I first cultivated an online/phone relationship with, well, we've haven't been doing the best the last week or so.  lately I have felt a little cool towards her, mostly because a) she tends to nag me over little things, which, if that is an indication of the kind of wife she would be, turns me off a little bit.  b) she looks less pretty to me than when we first "met" for some reason.  I'm not sure why; maybe its because other girls who are knockouts keep messaging me

- I have cultivated two or three very superficial friendships with other girls in cali in the event things with the girl in the above paragraph fall through, but nothing like the depth I have with her.  In part, i feel guilty getting close to other girls besides her, almost like I am cheating.  i try to remind myself that this is the phase where I really need to be picky and even a little selfish; if I marry a girl, by then it is too late to be picky. 

- I have a few inner confusions.  If things don't work out with girl #1, i dont want to use it as a personal excuse to go into womanizing mode, which I have a tendency to do.  I promised myself at the beginning of the year i would attempt to sleep with only one girl this year; last year I slept around more than I should and felt emptier for it.

- My biggest fear is settling.  I have a tendency to "satisfice," finding the first candidate with the bare minimum requirements and committing to it.  I did that wirh my first wife and that went horribly.  I want to be choosy without being unappreciative, unrealistic, or superficial. 

[utopiacowboy]

Dude, if she's nagging you now, it's not going to get better.

[raycjs]

Osa

do not settle, be very picky and if after meeting all of the above girls if you are not happy do not settle . You will have a lot of options, take it slow go on a lot of dates and be honest with all the girls and let them know you will be going out with other women. you are not cheating on any of them if you are upfront with them all. As far as your family just tell them you are going on vacation and that is that at this time you do not need to explain any thing more then that.

best of luck and have a safe trip

Ray

[fathertime]

Yo Osa, 

No need to beat yourself up over potentially wanting to see other ladies and doing a little womanizing.  That is par for the course for many men when they first hit Colombia.  Sew your oats now and when you do decide on a lady, you will hopefully not feel the need to sample the greener grass on the other side. 

The fact is it may take you a couple trips before you really decide to commit to one lady, but if that special lady comes along the first trip then don’t hesitate to commit.  But only if you are really feeling it!

Fathertime!

[Osa]

thanks.  you guy's comments are always productive, except when you're arguing with each other

more posts to come

[robert angel]

Oso,

Your honesty is admirable. This statement you made:

>>- My biggest fear is settling.  I have a tendency to "satisfice," finding the first candidate with the bare minimum requirements and committing to it.  I did that wirh my first wife and that went horribly.  I want to be choosy without being unappreciative, unrealistic, or superficial.<<

Reminds me of where I've been in the past. I was married once before my current marriage and it was to an orphan who had a horrible childhood. Well, marrying her didn't make her issues and demons go away.

I almost married a second lady overseas, who while being a little better off in that department, had a lot of dramas going on and I could see myself getting sucked into them. She wanted me to start the immigration paperwork before we even met in person.

Another lady had a way of turning on and off her feelings--she was hot and cold and overall non committal.

I went to the Philippines several times and each time was intimate with only one lady. I'd done my homework as best I could before heading over, laid out some exciting places to go, things to do and knew we'd have a good time. I didn't see other women once I got there, but to be honest, I had contacts over there and numbers I could've called if my original plans hit the fan, so to speak.

 I am no paragon of virtue--no white knight, but when I am with a woman and we're touring, having a lot of laughs and enjoying great sex, I tend to stay the course. I also find it real hard to having done all that with someone, turn around and basically say "Hey, you're a great gal--but we're not right for each other in terms of marriage". I don't break hearts easily.

If you marry her out of pity or because 'we've come this far'--ultimately there's a good chance it's gonna come back and bite you in the ass. Like it was stated, if she nagging you now, it's not going to get any better. In a way, the real honey moon is BEFORE the marriage. All the excitement of discovering each other, the nice hotels, meals, on and on. Life sets in and so does reality later.

It's oh so easy for me to say and harder, much harder for most guys to practice, but you need to get to a point after you've had that great time together--to detach yourself from the lovey dovey element and ask yourself 'Is this for real--for the very long term?". I live with the notion that 'nothing lasts forever', but I try to be an optimist at the same time, ironically enough.

If you marry someone, bring her to a culture far away and very different from what she's used to--how are you guys going to adjust? How about your family?--hers? Is she going from an active social life, full of busy days to being in a house/apartment in a foreign land without things (besides you) that make her happy? I know it's mainly about you and her, but sometimes the impact on our families and the wife's reaction to them (I have two kids and a loving extended family) make a difference.

Anyways, try and separate the emotional element from the objective and think it out---the adding up of the pros and cons. Heck, if I were doing it again, I'd probably make a Venn diagram!

My wife and I are very different and the Venn diagram would've predicted disaster, but her best characteristics really out weigh the few niggling things that irk me sometimes--so while trying to be 'objective', remember love and compatibility isn't a 'pure science'.

Nobody you meet is going to be 'perfect' although we sometimes make ourselves believe they are. We all 'settle' to some degree. My wife would've been just about 'perfect' if she came with a huge monetary inheritance and a clear cut idea of what she wanted to do with her engineering degree. That'd be great, but that wasn't in the cards. She's still shown a lot of aces though and adjusting to dealing with my two sons hasn't been easy for her.

But Oso, make sure you're SURE and try not to settle too much. Try and tune into your gut feelings, including those that aren't all positive, weigh and balance them out. Discuss your feelings and situation with someone you feel can be objective and you trust, who has a good sense of judgement.

If you think telling someone you really like, but who isn't the 'right one' for marriage 'good bye' now is hard--it's nothing compared to a divorce later on.

Don't be a knight in shining armor and a martyr to wit. If you end up in that role, there's a good chance that you'll end up doing each other a big disservice in the long run.

Being objective, even hard nosed and picky at this point in your life sounds like a good idea when you consider the long term stakes involved.

You can have a great trip and still not come home certain that 'she's 'the one'. meet several women and get a feel for the 'lay of the land'. It took me several 15,000 mile plus round trip journeys before I made up my mind--traveling to the two islands furthest apart from each other, among a nation that encompasses 7000+ islands. Try not to let your brain's sentimentality's and not wanting to hurt someone--not to mention other 'emotions', skew you from thinking objectively about what will eventually be a long term decision you have to live with.

You sound like a nice, intelligent guy. I am sure you'll have a great time and can do so without making a rash decision or whoring around. Just keep it all in perspective and take your time!

[Zon]

You seem like a nice guy.  I only hope the best.

BUT, a couple pointers from a guy who lived in Cali much of last year ...

Honesty is different and rare.  Your going to have to try to look through the locals eyes.  That can be a little tough if you are closed minded.

We all want to be happily married (at least for a short while:)  but you have to try to put those visions in your back pocket.  The city is FILLED with candidates from marriage 100x more than anycity USA.  You have to be choosey - without becoming a player.  It is not an easy balance.

Best advise I can give ... go to jccali.com  and get JC or his son to at least pick you up from the airport.  They are good people and many people on this board know and trust them.   You need to have a Plan A; B; and C. 

If you have any specific questions, just PM me.

best of luck

[Osa]

thanks for the comments, guys.  I think I'll use Zon's comments as an impetus to put into words my Plan A, B, and C

-------

Plan A

- Spend most if not all of my time with Girl#1, having fun, seeing attractions, eating, etc.  Come back to hotel and sleep alone most nights

- Be picked up from airport by Girl#1 and/or family

- Try to determine in the 12 days I'm there how strong a candidate for marriage she is

-------

Plan B

- In the event Plan doesn't work...shift to plan B once in Colombia

- Get on the email/phone/MSN/Skype with girls I have "met" through LatinAmericanCupid.com and drum up some last minute dates

- Create account ad hoc at colombiancupid.com and see if I can generate some last minute "candidates"

- Use first dates as an opportunity to see attractions I want to see, instead of taking girls out to dinner/drinks and then having to spring for attractions on top of that

------

Plan C

- If Plan A fails and Plan B isnt bringing in satisfactory results, call up one of the those wingmen, whose credibility is always being debated on this forum in for help, probably with introductions, etc

------

@Robert

Reminds me of where I've been in the past. I was married once before my current marriage and it was to an orphan who had a horrible childhood. Well, marrying her didn't make her issues and demons go away.

Reminds me of me!  My first wife was a foster child/child abuse victim, and, although she is a great person, she brought that into our marriage.  We were great on alot of levels but she didnt turn me on sexually at all.  its a long sad story I shouldnt start on though.

If you marry her out of pity or because 'we've come this far'--ultimately there's a good chance it's gonna come back and bite you in the ass.

That sounds very familiar

Is she going from an active social life, full of busy days to being in a house/apartment in a foreign land without things (besides you) that make her happy?

This could be a problem. I live alone, and have mostly gotten used it, and at this phase of my life, have a limited social life, mostly my very small family.   I'm wondering how I could help he adjust.  She'll need more friends than I can provide her (heck I need more friends).

[robert angel]

Osa,

Sounds like you've been through the pitfalls of living with someone who's never gotten over a terrible childhod/upbringing and you won't go down that path again.


Sometimes we repeat the same mistakes with relationships and aren't even aware of our stupidity till later.

Regarding worrying about her feeling isolated, it probably won't be as bad as you fear if you take a few simple measures. I don't socialize with a lot of people--I keep my circle of friends small, although I am friendly to a lot of 'acquaintances' mostly through work. I have a good relationship with my family and they love her, but they're a plane flight away.

I thought--especially before my wife could work (she wanted to) I'd get her a puppy. She definitely didn't want one and I'm glad. We have no family close by and it's nice to water the plants, lock the house and just leave for a while w/o worries.

I got her basic cook books, ladies magazines, celebrity magazines lots of music and we have 400 cable TV channels. I DIDN'T get her "Cosmopolitan" ragazine...

She watched more foreign TV & movies and spent more time on the computer than anywhere else, when she wasn't doing stuff around the house. Every day or so, we get out to the mall, a shady place at the beach, to eat, maybe out to a movie or to see the tourist spots around my place. We've hit Disney World, Universal, he Florida Keys, Hilton Head Island, the Smokey Mountains and the great white north a few times. That's over more than 4 years though--it's not like we're always running--we like to stay home and cuddle too.

I got her a decent cell phone with yahoo messenger and a medium range data package and found the best rate on a phone package so she knew she could call home to catch up w/ family and have a few laughs. She really has only made 2 or 3 friends out of the many 100's of fellow Filipinas, because she sees how they gossip and are just crazy and some are pretty loose.

I got her 3 step and then 4 step brand name product ingredient recipe cook books for cooking American style, but we also go to to the Asian and Latin stores and get stuff there. She likes the all you can eat Mexican Buffet on Sundays--some of the foods are actually similar to her provincial foods. She fills her plate up 3 or 4 times--I fill up maybe twice. She's just a bit over 5 ft tall and 90 pounds--I'm 6 ft and 210--go figure....

Anyway--being nervous is good in a way--you're thinking and getting ready. I'm sure you'll have a great time, just try and sew up those last few details so you have as many options as you need. Really, it sounds like you can't lose this time anyways--ENJOY!

[Osa]

T minus 18 days

- made deposit on Hotel

[Bricks]

Just wanted to say thanks for posting all this, as I may try this in the future. In catching up, a couple of pieces of advice came to mind. The greatest heartache in my life is having the mother of my kids not being someone I would rationally ever have kids with. She is a great gal in her own way and I wouldn't trade my kids for anything, but if I had been thinking with my right head.... So remember that sex makes babies, and if you can't envision having a baby with her, you probably have no business sleeping with her. After all, you are looking for a wife.  And to that end, I have found that once you get physical, ie, kissing and sex, your ability to be rational and objective disappears. At that point, you just want to get it on! So, try to keep it to just hugs and hand holding until you have a good idea about how your purposes, goals and lifestyles will mesh. You might sprain something, so take it easy however this exercise should prevent those empty feelings. This approach should also make it easy to see more than one woman on your trip because you can be honest with each woman.
 I realize that my point of view is a little extreme. I hope it helps....       

[Bob_S]

- the girl in Cali I first cultivated an online/phone relationship with, well, we've haven't been doing the best the last week or so.  lately I have felt a little cool towards her, mostly because a) she tends to nag me over little things, which, if that is an indication of the kind of wife she would be, turns me off a little bit.  b) she looks less pretty to me than when we first "met" for some reason.  I'm not sure why; maybe its because other girls who are knockouts keep messaging me

That's not it.  Don't you see the connection?  She doesn't look less pretty in comparison to other women, she looks less pretty because she is naggy.  A naggy wench with a nice rack is still a naggy wench (just with saggy bags in 10 years, so watch out).  If she were bubbly and friendly and affectionate and easy to get along with, she'd be the most beautiful woman you've ever seen, even when you two are in your 80's.

You got some back-up plans.  That's smart.  I think you're gonna need them.  Like Robert said, don't feel you need to "settle" just because you've spent so much time with this one and feel comfortable with her, especially if you just KNOW she isn't someone you can spend the rest of your life with.  Have a great trip.  Just remember, you're not there on a sex tour, you're there to find a spouse.  So be sure to use the big head at least as much if not more than the little head. 

[Dan Las Vegas]

My advice to you is just think of this first trip as a vacation and nothing more. Line up a few women to meet and keep it casual. This is your first trip to Colombia, so take it easy, enjoy your time in Cali and have fun and then start making plans for a return trip.

just my dos centavos

Dan

[osteve]

That's not it.  Don't you see the connection?  She doesn't look less pretty in comparison to other women, she looks less pretty because she is naggy.  A naggy wench with a nice rack is still a naggy wench (just with saggy bags in 10 years, so watch out).  If she were bubbly and friendly and affectionate and easy to get along with, she'd be the most beautiful woman you've ever seen, even when you two are in your 80's.

You got some back-up plans.  That's smart.  I think you're gonna need them.  Like Robert said, don't feel you need to "settle" just because you've spent so much time with this one and feel comfortable with her, especially if you just KNOW she isn't someone you can spend the rest of your life with.  Have a great trip.  Just remember, you're not there on a sex tour, you're there to find a spouse.  So be sure to use the big head at least as much if not more than the little head. 

            That's right Bob S. Always have backup plans.You'll do good if you are sincere and don't get sidetracked by "the little head".

            You can be picky without being a player also.

[fathertime]

thanks for the comments, guys.  I think I'll use Zon's comments as an impetus to put into words my Plan A, B, and C

-------

Plan A

- Spend most if not all of my time with Girl#1, having fun, seeing attractions, eating, etc.  Come back to hotel and sleep alone most nights

- Be picked up from airport by Girl#1 and/or family

- Try to determine in the 12 days I'm there how strong a candidate for marriage she is

-------

Plan B

- In the event Plan doesn't work...shift to plan B once in Colombia

- Get on the email/phone/MSN/Skype with girls I have "met" through LatinAmericanCupid.com and drum up some last minute dates

- Create account ad hoc at colombiancupid.com and see if I can generate some last minute "candidates"

- Use first dates as an opportunity to see attractions I want to see, instead of taking girls out to dinner/drinks and then having to spring for attractions on top of that

------

Plan C

- If Plan A fails and Plan B isnt bringing in satisfactory results, call up one of the those wingmen, whose credibility is always being debated on this forum in for help, probably with introductions, etc

------

@Robert

Reminds me of me!  My first wife was a foster child/child abuse victim, and, although she is a great person, she brought that into our marriage.  We were great on alot of levels but she didnt turn me on sexually at all.  its a long sad story I shouldnt start on though.

That sounds very familiar

This could be a problem. I live alone, and have mostly gotten used it, and at this phase of my life, have a limited social life, mostly my very small family.   I'm wondering how I could help he adjust.  She'll need more friends than I can provide her (heck I need more friends).

Osa,

Some women don't really need a big social life here in the states.  For example, my wife will on occasion go out with me and a few of my buddies, for the most part she seems content to talk to her Colombian friends on the computer while I'm working. When we are out publicly, she sticks under my arm like glue which I don't mind at all.   Generally speaking, she isn't real interested in making too many friends of her own here and it has almost 7 months.  I've asked her if she would like to socialize a bit, she has said she doesn't feel the need.    I didn't know she was so easy to please until she arrived and I lived with her.

I want to comment on one other item you brought up.  You mentioned you did not enjoy your first wife sexually.  You also stated earlier that this plan A girl doesn't seem to turn you on as much as some of the other gals you have been getting messages from.  It seems to me that you might be setting yourself up for something you are not going to be real happy with.  You are the only one who really knows what's in your head, but I would think real hard about making anybody Plan A, when you are having the type of reservations you have mentioned here!

Good luck,

Fathertime!
 

[Researcher]

       Hey Osa, sounds like you have everything all planned out.Don't forget to relax have fun and most of all meet women.I wouldn't expect alot from one trip.You could meet Miss Right but take the time to get to know her.


     Researcher

[Researcher]

 Osa,
  Let us know how it goes.

     Researcher

[Researcher]

   Oh yeah, and good luck on your trip!!!


 Researcher

[Osa]

time to catch up with a trip report.  I'll create an individual post for each day:

T minus 2 days:

-    Friday before my trip: major problem!  Didnt balance my checkbook correctly and some unpanned for things hit my checking account.  o no!   The $700 I had planned for spending was down to a meager $83 dollars.

-    Spent friday night into the wee-small hours of the morning applying online for payroll advances

-    Stress and worrying

[Osa]

T minus 1 Day (Saturday)

- spent the day on the phone and online with various internet lenders of various shades of shadiness

- One lender isn't enough.  I end up being told I am approved for various amounts by various lenders.  But the money won't appear till monday or tuesday.  Pretty nerve racking

- Get everything ready for my trip next day.  Stop by to visit my daughter and her mother in case something happens, and especially because I won't see my daughter two weeks, and, since she is still a  baby practically, i don't want her to grow estranged from me.  I don't tell her mom where I'll be for two weeks only that I wont be available.  She is curious as hell

- I don't tell my mom I'm going to colombia.  I simply couldnt think of a good enough cover story, plus I hate lying to my mom.

- Give car keys to my neighbor who'll be moving my car for street cleaning days.

[Osa]

TRIP DAY (SUNDAY)

- wake up at 4:15 to do last minute prep for cab, which will arrive at 5:15am.

- go through my checklist of things to not to forget

- still sweating over my spending money not showing up in accounts yet (these were supposed to be "Fast Cash in One Hour" but alas it is the weekend

- get dressed in a good looking black on black suit.  Want to make a good impression on Girl #1, who *should* be picking me up from the airport.

- Cab brings me to airport well in advance of my 8am flight time.  After going through security and am at the gate, I decide its time to break out my laptop and kill some time; maybe play a game and check out my loans.   What do I find?  Oh no, I've forgotten to pack my laptop's powercable!  How the hell am I gonna check on my loans?  And what am I gonna do for 8 hour layover in panama with no laptop?  

- Well, i try to do some clear thinking, and meditate on positive things.  I decide this is God's way of getting me off the computer for a few days; I practically live on the darn thing.  I'll find a way to check the internet elsewhere.  i decide not having a working laptop for my voyage is a positive.

- Flight to Panama: uneventful, except for the very nice mountains around the airport that one sees while landing.

- Layover in Panama:  for some reason, as soon as I get to Panama, I get hit with some sort of allergy.  I'm all snotty for most of the layover.   Either it is dust, or just my nerves.  Anyway I'm bored to death on my layover.  Until...

- I see an elderly man with a violin case across the gate.  I make a violin motion with my arms to him, and he nods.  I ask him if he'd like to discuss music for a while, and he says yes.  So we spend about three hours discussing music and music theory (I'm an amateur composer) for about three hours.  Also, he has this weird menthol concoction he carries on him.  he gives me a little and I put it under my nose, and it alleviates my snottiness about 60%.

- We watch one another's bags while we use the bathroom, phone, etc.  I try calling girl#1 on her cell phone and home phone a few times, but get no answer.  Now I'm nervous about not being received at the airport, though I am emotionally prepared for it

[Osa]

TRIP DAY (SUNDAY) Part 2

- Flight from Panama City to Cali: short, not even 90 minutes.  View coming into Cali is spectacular from the air, and the mountains surrounding the city, all lit up with street lights and stuff, is supercool. 

- When I land, the path "out" takes you basically from the plane to the gate straight to customs, which is basically at the exit.  In other words, there is no going "through" the airport to enjoy any of it amenities (Bathroom, flower shop, currency exchange).

- Baggage claim and customs is essentially the same room.  I get my bag, they rummage it through it lightly (as if its just a formality), and I am going out the exit.

- Reception:  I'm going outside, with a fellow carrying my large luggage bag, and there behind the little fence is: Girl #1!!  She's there with her mom.  She's taking pictures of me as I walk out and has a huge smile.  She gives me a big hug.  Her mom presents me with a single red rose and gives me a hug, and they have a little sign they made with crayon that says "Bienvenido a Colombia Omar!".   I feel like a mini rock-star.  Her brother also comes out from behind the crowd as we make our way to a taxi.

- She looks GREAT!  I was having slight second thoughts during my layover in Panama (alot of beautiful girls in that airport) as to whether my main "candidate" is gorgeous enough.  But when she received me, all of that went away.  her face looked like a doll and her body was just perfect: petite in the right places but with juicy, subtle and understated curves.  At 22 she is definitely in her prime.

- Anyway, after a few second of "what do we do now," we decide it is pretty late (it about 10:45pm at this point) and the wise thing is to get me checked into my hotel, which is pretty far.  (the airport itself is way outside the city to the east).  I realize I dont have a dime in Colombian pesos, so I ask the taxista if he'll take dollars.  he says yes.  We travel to the hotel, with girlie all over me clinging to me giving me little pecks.  her mother seems happy to have me there, too.

- Once at the hotel, girlie and her brother help me bring up my bags and stuff.  We get into a little tiff with the taxista over how much we owe and how he doesnt have that much change for dollars, etc.  My girlie figures out something between borrowing a little from her mom in pesos, and works some magic (not sure exactly what the deal was) but that gets rid of the taxi driver.  We stand around chatting for a bit getting to know each other, then I make sure I give her enough in dollars for cab fare home and enough for her to come back to visit me the next morning. 

- The hotel gives me a cell phone I can be contacted at. However I learn I have to put minutes on it to make outbound calls, but I can receive in bound calls for free.

- End of the day and I should be ready to sleep, but I had a long lazy layover and rested on the flights, plus I am wired.  I put on cable and watch for a while and eventually slip into a nervous, anxious sleep.

[Osa]

Trip Day 2

- I wake up early after an anxious sleep.  Okay, 8:30am is early for me.  Girlie calls me soon afterward to let me know she'll be there at 11am  I ca't wait for her to get to my room so I can love her down

- I decide to get busy.  I shower, take advantage of the complimentary breakfast the hotel provides via the in-house street cafe (two eggs, toast, and coffee).  Across the street is a Bancolombia, which I go to exchange the cash I do have.  My hotel concierge tells me I'll need my passport to exchange at the bank.  but it is worth it cause banks give the best exchange rates.  It takes about twenty minutes at the bank, between waiting in line, filling out a form, them taking your fingerprints, and processing.  Okay now I have about $250 in colombian pesos.  Not much, and I definitely have to make this last until my emergency cash come through.

- Next door to the bank is an internet cafe.  i check my email, and check my account for my emergency loans.  Nothing yet.  For half an hour of internet usage: 500 pesos.  Which is approximately 25 cents. You can't beat that with a bat.

- I ask around, and am directed to a pharmacy (Drogeria) where I can get some allergy medicine.  I take it, and haven't had any allergies since.

- Girlie shows up.  She looks great.  We hit the town, go for a walk, then catch a taxi to the Mall.  it is "Dia de La Mujer" (Women's Day) in Colombia.  We eat at a very good.

- We go back to my hotel and chill.  In the evening I send her home via taxi.

[Osa]

Day 3

- In the evening of day three, her mom and brother take a taxi up to hotel.  We head out to the Parque del Perro (The Dog Park). 

- There we eat stuffed arepa's (they're delicious) and cheap which is good if you are picking up the tab for four people (I'm still worried about my cash coming in).

- We take lots of fotos in the park.   it smells of marijuana there and suddenly I wish I had some 

- I'm invited to lunch the next day at the family home.  Also, her mom gives her blessing to let girlie spend the night with me.  I'm sorta shocked.

[Osa]

Day 4

- We wake up late.  She tells me I have a huge snoring problem and she hardly slept a wink, but loves me anyway.  (I really gotta get that checked when I get home).

- Girlie is very "carinosa" and loving.  She's very girlie, and attentive, and is showering me always with kisses and sweetness.  its a nice change from american girls, who I find to me cold and forever holding back.  This girl doesnt know the meaning of the word.  She loves and loves and loves almost to the point of smothering.  And she's so beautiful that its a pleasure.

- We take a taxi to her barrio.  The streets in her Barrio are extremely thin -- think 8 feet across. Admittedly, her barrio is more poor than I expected.  If it hadn't been for previous trips I've made to Santo Domingo and West Africa, I would have been taken aback.  But I'd seen this before when my dad had shown me where he grew up.  Kinda weird, kinda like I had come back to my origins to find a girl for me.

- Her home is modest; their grandfather actually built this house from bricks himself (it looks it).  The "right side" of the kitchen, which is a staircase to the apartment on the second floor, is actually in open air!  So when it rains, it rains indoors; they have a drain on the kitchen floor for the water to drain out.  I found that funny.

- Anyway I am treated to an excellent lunch of sancocho (a thick soup with everything in it) , stewed chicken, rice, shredded lettuce, and beer.  I can't eat it all but everybody else does.

- I'm treated like one of the family and very nicely.  its hot as balls on this day, so we spend the day alternating between laying around, trying to "fix" her computer (which turns out to simply be a bogus copy of windows with no legit registration key), and getting salsa lessons from her mom.

- In the afternoon her brother and I go a few blocks down to play billiards in a hole in the wall storefront.  We order a bottle of vodka to keep us company the rest of the evening.

- We all, and other friend we picked up, go out for stuffed arepas again, with our vodka in hand.  We spend the evening eating and discussing south american politics.

- I'm less worried about spending money now, as I checked my account and I'm starting to see my various loans materialize.  What a relief.