trip so far

[jm21-2]

China responds well to shame. When the media reports stuff like this... it embarrasses them.

It appears to just be the small town where her sister lives (and she was staying at) that shut down the internet cafes. I don't htink it owuld be a big story. Actually, there are probably plenty of people here in the US who would want the same thing.

On my latin america chica hunt i've been to Costa Rica, Colombia, Mexico, and Honduras. I get the feeling you'd like to date and meet some girls (and that's the way IMO to find the best person for you).  You don't by any means seems sold on your current girlfriend/penpal... why not fly to a city and meet some girls?

I can tell you from experience I've had the task of telling a nice girl it isn't going to work out.

I don't really like dating, which is probably part of the problem. This is the first girl I have ever thought I might end up marrying. We had a rocky start but after we got over that initial bump she was just about perfect. I have a very difficult personality to deal with, especially dealing with girls, so it's very hard to find someone I am compatible with. I was concerned about her looks for a while but the last day I got her to put her hair down and wear a dress I got her and she looked great. I think it's worth a second trip.

I just don't sound very enthusiastic about practically anything and thinking about marriage right now is overloading me. In the last year or so I finished law school, passed the bar, moved to a new state/area where I don't know anyone, started a successful practice, bought a boat, will probably buy a house soon, and possibly marriage too? I'm a natural worrier with way too much to worry about. Everything is going so damn fast for me right now. It feels like I'm making up for all those years wasted in school all at once.

[bcc_1_2]

haha I can relate. I finished my MBA not all that long ago. used to teach some night classes at a community college. Working full time... finding time to travel... just got engaged etc. I just save some money and use my parents' boat now.

but my priorities in these last couple of years have changed. I value my time more than getting rich. I guess I've just chilled out a bit.

Anyways dating is certainly a bitch here. Spend a bunch of money and time on some brat that thinks you owe it to her. But it is a way different experience in Central and South America. And I bet the city girls in China (or elsewhere) would appreciate you a lot more too.

I just know if we could get you to Cali we could really complicate your life ... but in a very good way.

You can find the full package believe me. But it takes work. I don't know you personally but from this board and PMs I got the impression that this girl and (especially her family) were really serious about you as a husband. Now I get the impression that your g/f is way better for you than the local AWs... but further down the road in this relationship I can definitely see you wondering about greener pastures. I'm a terrible person but I really think you should move on and meet others. Shame on me!

[jm21-2]

Same here...money is not that important. I think I might end up looking for some year long contract work with a non-profit....lower pay and less stability but more satisfying work and I could leave for a while when the contract is up.

I never spent much money dating here. If a girl wanted to be pampered I wouldn't waste my time. My main problem is that if I like a girl I am very blunt and straightforward with her and never do small talk. That is not attractive at all to girls here. In China at least it's not as big of a deal. People there are very blunt with each other it seems.

For me it's more an internal debate about what type of girl I should be pursuing. This girl is smart, fun, feisty, very good with money, affectionate....all qualities which are very attractive to me. She's also very picky about boyfriends (she's considered a major catch in China) and pretty well off so I don't have to worry about her being a green card shark or marrying for money. I don't think I could meet a girl with a more attractive personality. But I keep thinking maybe I should just find some poor, beautiful, simple, country girl who likes to cook and clean and be a house-wife. It would probably be a lot less complicated. This girl would want to work, want me to help out with the housework, would hold me to a high standard, and would argue for what she wants to do re: where to live, what to spend money on, and that sort of thing. It seems like a lot of effort for a girl who's just good looking. Man that was shallow. And you know, there's that kid in the candy shop attitude you get over there because young foreign guys are extremely popular with the girls. Goes to your head fast and makes you think you are entitled to only the most beautiful girls.

In any case, I think I would probably go back to China to look again rather than Latin America. Maybe Japan, Thailand, or Malaysia.

[bcc_1_2]

Shanghai, Hong Kong, Bangkok, Santiago, Cali, Sao Paulo, etc doesn't matter which city you'll be a big catch in anyone of them. Do me a favor take a week and just put yourself in front of a bunch of women and see what is out there. Doing that really helped me get it together. It isn't bad for the ego either.