Age Gap Tolerence?

[mudd]

Soltero,
completely true, seen many men with nothing more than  " arm candy"  20 or 30 year age difference, with no hopes of keeping the girl long term, and then they wonder and complain later why the gold digger/visa scammer left them.

[bcc_1_2]

What you have to understand is that more than a few of the guys that head south looking for love are social retards and wouldn't understand what to do with a woman if they came with instructions.

I agree with this. I don't think these "social retards" are evil or even have bad intentions. In the area of social situations, dating, etc they are just literally retarded. If you get rejected by all the women you find attractive in the states and you somehow find a way to meet women you find attractive somewhere else you go for it. Then when you get down there the 42 year old guy pushes the envelope. The 35 or 30 year old women (with or without kids) isn't good enough so he finds someone 18-24. Maybe in some [snip]ty small town in Colombia this gringo looks like a knight in shining armor, but in Peoria he's going to look like a socially ackward chemistry teacher who teaches sitting down behind his desk to hide his wood from the high school girls.

Weird remarks... I know... but you didn't meet a high school chemistry teacher in Cali... I did 

[Bob_S]

...you didn't meet a high school chemistry teacher in Cali... I did 

Hot for teacher, eh? 

[GatoAzul]

Soltero,
completely true, seen many men with nothing more than  " arm candy"  20 or 30 year age difference, with no hopes of keeping the girl long term, and then they wonder and complain later why the gold digger/visa scammer left them.

Agreed.  I often thought that way!  Women always get in the 'wrong' !!

[Cbear]

You all are lumping everyone together, there are people on this board who have very successful marriages with much younger woman. So basically you are insulting them when you call them retards or evil.

Each relationship is different, to be judged on its own merits.

[mudd]

Cbear,
 true, the posters are lumping evverybody in the same pot, but  the number of  men with much much younger novas or espoas in a long term relationship is very very low. they are the exception. i wouldn't call then evil or retarded,  but extremely lucky to find a much younger girl who actually loves them for them themselves, instead of money, cars, big house, or potential green card later. each relationship is different, like you said, it depends on the two people involved, their personality capability, looks capability,( he actually looks good at 45-50) bla bla ect, but most men, much older than their partner fail in this journey when they try to be is a serious relationship with a much younger woman.I myself could be dating a much much,much  younger women myself, but why would i want to date a women, that could be the same age as my daughter,  no thanks!!!!. just my $ .02 everybody walks to the beat of a different drummer, ehhh,ummmmm   or something like that haha.

[utopiacowboy]

I'm with you on that one, Mudd. Being with a much younger woman makes me feel my age acutely. It's a constant reminder of how young she is and how old I am. With my wife, I can feel young even though I know that I'm an old fart.

[Jeff S]

[sabound]

guys who are 50 and thinks its cool to date a 20 yo has some self esteem issues . They simply can't hold on to a intelligent lady with in there own age . it is just that simple , and when you see a 20 yo with a 45-50 yo there is one thing on her mind ..... green card ... maybe

[bcc_1_2]

Each relationship is different, to be judged on its own merits.

True it was a generalization and every relationship is different, but if you are using that point or that line of thinking to say I'm special, I'm/we are clearly different than all those other couples/situations, I/we are the statistical anomaly... then I ask you what did all those other men say to themselves to justify their relationship? In fact the guy saying these things would be just like those generalized guys.

Due to economic situations (way more so than an evil, greedy, bad, etc woman) western men can date/ have a relationship with much younger women. I was recently on the other board reading about a poster named KenC who seemed like a great guy and who had a very sincere wife. His wife was Russian but IMO a very good read on actual experience with this situation.

[bcc_1_2]

When you are happily married for a long time I suppose this topic would get very old... well unless I misinterpeted your image and it was about S&M Horseplay 

But having it come up now and again is healthy. It helps reinforce use of the big head which can save a lot of heartache.

[Zon]

Many posts here just don't get it. Colombia is not like another state.  It is a different country with a drastically different culture.  You will not get far trying to understand if you do not take full note of this difference in perspective.  

What is normal, not for AM and CW ... but for CM and CW?  That is the Age Gap Answer.

Close along side is the League Gap issue too - they are always intertwined.

What are the elements that make up selection IN COLOMBIA?  !! M O N E Y !!  STATUS  !!!   SECURITY !!!! Secondary issues: physical attraction; ability to dance; personality; (Intelligence and career are far down the list).

Do not try to understand Age or League Gaps while sitting on South Beach or in Denver - they do not translate. IN Colombia - without a Gringo getting off the plane - there are HUGE AGE and LEAGUE GAPS.  It is natural. In fact, it is not even seen in those terms.  

Beauty if valued in every culture. But, especially in Colombia there is something far more differentiating than beauty - it is money and status.  It is almost a caste system. It is severe, ever present, and often cruel.

If this sounds strange to anybody then go back to the drawing boards and start to figure all over again.  I am 100% right on this issue.  And it applies to 99.9% of all Colombianas.

Once you understand this .... then you begin to see who really is the hunted.  

[bcc_1_2]

Do not try to understand Age or League Gaps while sitting on South Beach or in Denver - they do not translate.

I don't disagree with anything you posted about Colombia. What you are missing is that these guys are from Denver, Casper, Buffalo, Peoria, Omaha, Duluth, etc. They are bringing a woman from Colombia to Denver, Colorado. And they want.. even expect these women to assimilate into society. Don't think so? Then why is she enrolled in english lessons at the local community college.  When you assimilate someone into the local culture then it truely is about whats going on in Denver.

The question isn't can you attract her and marry her... the question is will you have a long term successful relationship in Denver, Colorado.

[henryw]

What are the elements that make up selection IN COLOMBIA?  !! M O N E Y !!  STATUS  !!!   SECURITY !!!! Secondary issues: physical attraction; ability to dance; personality; (Intelligence and career are far down the list).

... it is money and status.  It is almost a caste system. It is severe, ever present, and often cruel.

Rivcardo I think that is the most insightful post about Colombian women and their "dating" culture that I´ve ever read anywhere.

[Ray]

guys who are 50 and thinks its cool to date a 20 yo has some self esteem issues . They simply can't hold on to a intelligent lady with in there own age . it is just that simple , and when you see a 20 yo with a 45-50 yo there is one thing on her mind ..... green card ... maybe

I’m sorry, but that was the most simple-minded post I’ve seen here in a long time. So let’s see now…

1. Guys with much younger wives or girlfriends have self-esteem issues.

2. A young lady who is with an older man must not be intelligent.

3. If she is with an older man then she must be thinking only of a Green Card.

To see a couple on the street with a seemingly large age difference, without knowing ANYTHING about them, and to ass-u-me all that makes you no different from those feminists that everyone is always complaining about.

Yes, it’s all very simple… 

[Jeff S]

When you are happily married for a long time I suppose this topic would get very old... well unless I misinterpeted your image and it was about S&M Horseplay 

But having it come up now and again is healthy. It helps reinforce use of the big head which can save a lot of heartache.

Right. Every week or so, it's good for the young guys to whine about how gross it is for older guys to be after their age women to try to keep away the competition.

It's always productive to inject a bunch of mindless platitudes:

If a young woman goes after an older guy she's a green card shark who is going to dump him at the first chance to run off with a young good looking stud whose going to treat her like crap.

If a man dates a younger women, he only does so because he's thinking with his little head. (I'll let you young guys in on a little secret, you probably won't believe. Mid 30 women are waaaaaaaayyyyy hotter than young 20 women.)

Questioning the intelligence of many of the happily married people here is a way to make friends and influence people, too.

So what say we debate this evey other day. That'll be lots of fun.

[OsageDave]

(I'll let you young guys in on a little secret, you probably won't believe. Mid 30 women are waaaaaaaayyyyy hotter than young 20 women.)

Shhhh .... I was hoping to keep that info under wraps.

[bcc_1_2]

Right. Every week or so, it's good for the young guys to whine about how gross it is for older guys to be after their age women to try to keep away the competition.

Well there really wasn't any American men (well hardly any) competition in Honduras. There was in Cali... if you want to call 99% of those guys competition. Would be nice if there actually were some decent or cool guys that went to Cali so women would actually sign up at the agencies or fill out an online dating profile.

If you are young, attractive (or even semi-attractive) and have a job... you need not worry about competition in Latin America. As for the actual age tolerance issue.. I've never had a problem with seeing couples 15 or 20 years apart. I'll admit what does get to my stomach is those pictures of retired old men at socials dancing with teens (easy to find on that loveme site) At some point we all draw the line or grab a bucket.

As for the competition... even through I'm not out there looking anymore... I would have welcomed it. I suspect those... at least going down or living in Cali... would as well.

[CeeTeeEnn]

What are the elements that make up selection IN COLOMBIA?  !! M O N E Y !!  STATUS  !!!   SECURITY !!!! Secondary issues: physical attraction; ability to dance; personality; (Intelligence and career are far down the list).

Rivardco, I hate to butt in like this but your recent posts (both here and on another recent thread) makes for some alarming and depressing reading to anyone contemplating heading to Colombia to meet a decent woman for a life partner - perhaps especially the newbies.

I do not doubt the fact that some - or indeed many - Colombian women employ a selection process based on (sic) money, status, security, and then physical attraction, the ability to dance, personality.. and then finally (almost begrudgingly?) Intelligence and career. I only assume that such women are erm, how can i put it, not very high up within the "caste system" and that their nagging presence will nonetheless not ruin the experiences of any sincere, decent and socially intelligent "gringo" travelling down there in the hope of meeting a sincere and decent Colombiana. And sincere and decent Colombianas do exist - a fact testifiable by some of the happily married male members of this forum. But if any Colombiana i meet should ever try to judge me according to my money - or worse still my ability to dance (?!?) - over and above my intelligence or career... believe me I won't even have time telling her to "f**k off and go to hell" as by the time she notices i'll be long gone.

Please therefore explain why you make such sweeping and disparaging remarks about 99.9% of Colombianas in your posts, and why you are so certain you're right on this issue. Is the fact that you are now searching in Brazil something to do with this? I for one am sincerely anxious to know, because truth be told I also harbour some serious doubts as to the value of travelling to Colombia for the sole purpose of meeting Latinas.

[GatoAzul]

 Mid 30 women are waaaaaaaayyyyy hotter than young 20 women.)

Agree 

[EbonyPrince]

but when the average man is dating a much younger girl, he is outcastred as a loser, desperate, middle age crisis, cradle robber

I guess it depends on how you look at it.  If a man had a choice between someone that had a streamlined body, flawless skin, and not a wrinkle or stretch mark in sight that was 24, or a woman that looks and is built like she has been through both world wars at age 44. Common sense and logic would tell you who's the loser.  If taking the 24 year old makes me a loser, then I will take a loss any day of the week.

[Zon]

to be fair, I ought to limit my remarks on women of the Cali area.  And maybe the proportion is 94.9%, not 99%.

My objective by making this comments, and they are overwhelmingly true, is NOT to suggest that it is impossible to find a GREAT lady in Cali - or anywhere else; in an agency - or anywhere else.  But rather to shine a more realistic and truthful light on the subject.

There are TONS of attractive women women that will date almost any Americano.  But when you begin to apply filters, and characteristics (comes from a good family; educated; no child; whatever), those numbers become small fast.

[Kiltboy1]

This applies only to Colombia because in most other Latin countries, the age gap is much closer to normal elsewhere in the developed world.You rarely see 20 year spreads in Ecuador, Venezuela, Argentina, and the more Euro Latin countires, Colombia and the DR are the ones that seem to have big age spreads due to oppressed economic and civil war conditions and for the DR, just a bad education system that makes it necessary to date us OLD PHARTS. I cannot tell you how many Colombianas I talked to that had the same lame ass excuse why they will not date men there own age" HE DOES NOT RESPET ME, HE CHEATS ON  ME" That is BS because most of the guys bail on these women because they are incredibly jealous and have such low self esteem that there constant temper tantrums make the men just say--I AM OUTTA HERE CHICA. And of course, unlike here in the Depressed States of America, the CMs have way more options at there disposal then we do.

KB

[EbonyPrince]

guys who are 50 and thinks its cool to date a 20 yo has some self esteem issues . They simply can't hold on to a intelligent lady with in there own age . it is just that simple , and when you see a 20 yo with a 45-50 yo there is one thing on her mind ..... green card ... maybe

Your assuming that these people want a 50 year old woman in their age group.  How many guys travel to Colombia and select average looking women their age that are equal in looks to women that they are getting here?  I would say not very many.  Any man can get married at any time here in the states.  Personally I know that I am very physical.  The l personality and heart aren't the first things I notice, otherwise I would have been married many times over with great women that are all around me here.  If I am not attracted to a woman physically, then there is no way in hell I am ever going to marry her.  It is just that simple.  Sure you can never trust a big butt and a smile, but that is why we have instincts and brains.  As I have always said, I have met many young and hot latinas that were very interested in me.  They were by far more mature, exciting, and energetic than many of the older women that I have met.  Many of them took me to meet their parents, and these families didn't look to be suffering financially at all.  Many women regardless of living in America or Colombia seek some type of finanancial security in the mate selection process.  So a man needs to do what he feels is best for him regardless of other people's ignorant or prejudiced thoughts and judgements.

A dominicana that sent these links to me that I found very interesting.  It all goes to whatever floats your boat.  As one of my boys always tells me: "If you like it, then I love it."  In the following clips one woman briefly talks about her issues with English men.  In these days and times, women are doing the same things that men do.  Today the world is just a much different place.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5pi51D-sLcE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTTA1c4kIn8&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5V6ofJPWUw&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJ4Byz3TmAU&feature=channel_page

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jliqtIHaKw&feature=related

[bcc_1_2]

  In these days and times, women are doing the same things that men do. 

True and I heard even more of them go to jamaica. But there is a big difference from going to Costa Rica (that's where the guys go) and getting your freak on for a week compared to marrying someone and bringing them back with you.