leaving May 23rd

[veryserious]

I am leaving to see my lady on May 23rd. Plan to to get married while I am there. I would have two questions?

1. How long does it take to get the license? If I can get the seminar done in the first couple of days. I will spend my first night in Manila and go to the Embassy the next morning to get my affidavit.

2. I have read about the "departure tax" how much is that?

[soltero]

Excuse me, but have you met this woman in person yet (Your previous posts stated that you were planning to meet her in April or May)? How can you plan to marry someone you haven't spent any time with? I am not trying to judge, just understand. Could you please explain your mindset and what has led you to this? I am genuinely curious and hope that you will reply honestly and without any venom.

[GatoAzul]

I am leaving to see my lady on May 23rd. Plan to to get married while I am there. I would have two questions?

1. How long does it take to get the license? If I can get the seminar done in the first couple of days. I will spend my first night in Manila and go to the Embassy the next morning to get my affidavit.

2. I have read about the "departure tax" how much is that?

By judging in your posting, it seems you have not met your lady yet let alone planning to get married.  I am as curious as Soltero.  Like Soltero said how can you plan to marry someone you haven't met in real life.  This is exactly what I thought so.

I am engaged to a lady from Bogota, but she is NOT the same person when we spoke each other over the webcam / MSN.  I have already met my fiancee 3 times but I still am not ready to get married with her until at least a year.  I am happy to get engaged with her, but getting married is a very big commitment.

I wish you the best of luck with your decision and I hope you have made the right decision, but remember, marriage is a very big step!

[veryserious]

I am a Muslim we don't date we get to know someone and there family and we get married. It has work for us for a very long time. I a lot of my friends that have went this route and not a one has gotten divorced in the 12 years I have been Muslim. In most cases they have know the woman for a much shorter period of time.

[soltero]

I am a Muslim we don't date we get to know someone and there family and we get married. It has work for us for a very long time. I a lot of my friends that have went this route and not a one has gotten divorced in the 12 years I have been Muslim. In most cases they have know the woman for a much shorter period of time.

That is understandable as it is a custom of your religion. Does your intended share the same faith as you?

[Ray]

I am leaving to see my lady on May 23rd. Plan to to get married while I am there. I would have two questions?

1. How long does it take to get the license? If I can get the seminar done in the first couple of days. I will spend my first night in Manila and go to the Embassy the next morning to get my affidavit.

2. I have read about the "departure tax" how much is that?

There is a 10-day wait from the time you apply for the marriage license until they issue it. After you get your affidavit from the embassy, you will need to apply for the license at the local civil registrar, municipal office, or courthouse where she lives. Be aware that some jurisdictions may count the days a little differently. It could be 10 calendar days or business days (or office days), which could possibly be as long as 14 days. I waited for 9 actual days because of the way they counted. It is possible to legally get the 10-day wait waived, but only by a sitting judge in court.

The fee for the marriage license depends on your income but is no big deal.

Note: If this will be a Muslim ceremony in the Autonomous Region of Mindanao, they “may” have different rules.

I think the departure tax is P200 (about $4) for local flights and P750 (about $16) for international flights.

Ray

[veryserious]

Yes she is. In fact the city she lives in has more Mosque than we have in ours. Also I talked someone here that has been there and he said that we can get married in a Muslim ceremony and file a affidavit with city hall after. Relations with Muslims in most of the Philippines is good I am told.

Ray thank you for the answers to my questions.

[Capstone]

I wish you the best of luck in your upcoming marriage and hope that you have a great time while in the PI!!

[Jeff S]

Congratulations and please keep us posted on your trip.

[jm21-2]

Hm. I talked with a Muslim friend of mine who I hadn't spoken with in ages last night and he's still trying to get me to convert to Islam with the bribe that Muslim women make great wives. Good luck VS. I would have thought Malay would be the top choice for a Muslim looking for an Asian wife, but whatever works.

From what people have told me the short dating period spurs you to ask the serious questions and be as honest as possible. I can't count the people I know who never talk about anything serious with their girlfriend...stay away from religion, politics, what marriage means, child-rearing, life goals, how to deal with money matters, etc...so even if they've been dating for months they really know next to nothing about how they would be as a spouse. I remember a friend had dated this girl for quite some time, always bragging about her, then he mentioned some news article dealing with religion to her, she went off on a tirade, and he finally figured out she was part of some extremist Christian group and her whole life revolved around that. I could see someone in the US getting married without even knowing basic things about their spouse because it's taboo to ask or it's not romantic.

[Jeff S]

Well - it's said that arranged marriages have a much higher success rate than "love" marriages. That's true in Japan - omiai (not really a forced arrangement, but rather a voluntary one) have a much better success rate than the alternate, and so have been staging a comeback in recent years. In many cultures and religions, and I suspect Islam is one of them, women have been brought up and taught how to be wives - how to please their men, and exactly what is expected of them. Men, likewise have been taught what is expected of them, and more often than not, these are anything but master/slave relationships. They're like two players in a sports team, each playing their own positions and relying on the other to play theirs. It's much different than the typical 'gimme gimme, it's all about me' attitudes most Americans have these days - both men and women.

As I've posted in the past - real love isn't something you find or fall into, it's something you do - every day, over and over through good times and bad. First you do it - then you feel it - just like any other activity, whether personal training, playing a musical instrument, or anything else. Naturally it has to start with a spark, but the concept of having to have fallen head-over-heels in love first is a relatively modern, and surely not a necessity if you're both willing to put in the effort needed. It's a fairy tale concept that in real life, is many shades of gray instead of being black or white.

[piglett]

I wish you the best of luck VS
can you post a couple of pictures of the wedding when you get back to the US.?
do you intend for your wife to work once she gets here?
I'm not sure if you have already said in a previous post, what part of the country do you live in?

piglett

[Bear]

Good luck VS.  Getting the certificate at the embassy took me less than a day.  The Health course took us 3 days and the normal waiting period I think was 10 days in country.

My son converted to Islam and I think he is finding wives are wives, just your religion dictates how you will act in marriage.  Changing religions for a mate rarely works.

The Bear Family

[veryserious]

I wish you the best of luck VS
can you post a couple of pictures of the wedding when you get back to the US.?
do you intend for your wife to work once she gets here?
I'm not sure if you have already said in a previous post, what part of the country do you live in?

piglett

 plan to post pictures of the wedding. My wife will not need to work and would prefer to be a housewife. I plan to suppoert her until she comes no more 12hrs a day in a factory. I live in Ohio

[veryserious]

Good luck VS.  Getting the certificate at the embassy took me less than a day.  The Health course took us 3 days and the normal waiting period I think was 10 days in country.

My son converted to Islam and I think he is finding wives are wives, just your religion dictates how you will act in marriage.  Changing religions for a mate rarely works.

The Bear Family

Thanks Bear

She spoke with a friend of hers that works for the city and they said they require a seminar that is 1 day then there is 10 day after that they will issue the license.

[Ray]

VS,

If you haven't already seen this, here is some pertinent info on marriage in the Philippines...

http://manila.usembassy.gov/wwwha009.html

Ray

[veryserious]

VS,

If you haven't already seen this, here is some pertinent info on marriage in the Philippines...

http://manila.usembassy.gov/wwwha009.html

Ray

Thanks Ray I have read that. I was confused because her town hall print requirements were not clear to me. But as you said earlier they seem to be somewhat flexible on the time requirements. i.e. Bear says that it 10 days in the country I thought it was 10 days after all paper work is completed. But from what I understand I should plenty of time. 

Thanks again

[Ray]

It doesn't have anything to do with how long you have been in the country.

The 10-day wait is prescribed by law. Like it says, you file the marriage license application and then wait 10 days until they issue the license.

How long are you planning to be over there for this trip?

Ray

[piglett]

  My wife will not need to work and would prefer to be a housewife. I plan to suppoert her until she comes no more 12hrs a day in a factory. I live in Ohio

My girl works 12 hours a day 6 days a week in Manila
I am amazed the hours that these ladies have to work just to survive
I have driven through Ohio many times when i was a truck driver
how is the economy in your part of the state?

[veryserious]

It doesn't have anything to do with how long you have been in the country.

The 10-day wait is prescribed by law. Like it says, you file the marriage license application and then wait 10 days until they issue the license.

How long are you planning to be over there for this trip?

Ray

A little over 3 weeks I know I have to apply for a extension beyond the 21 days.

[veryserious]

My girl works 12 hours a day 6 days a week in Manila
I am amazed the hours that these ladies have to work just to survive
I have driven through Ohio many times when i was a truck driver
how is the economy in your part of the state?

All I can say is the the economy here is better than most of the state. (but that is not saying much) Because of my business it does not affect me.

[Ray]

VS,

A little over 3 weeks should just be enough, barely.

If you allow 2 weeks to get all the paperwork out of the way, then have a wedding ceremony, that gives you about a week or so for a honeymoon. Have any plans for the honeymoon?

Get that marriage license application in as soon as possible because that's the biggest holdup. That will give you about 10 days to do all the social formalities, like asking for permission from the parents, meeting all the relatives, etc. You must be getting pretty excited by now.

What kind of ceremony do you have planned? What will you wear? I'm familiar with the traditional Catholic Church weddings in the Philippines, but I know nothing about a traditional Muslim wedding.

Can't wait to see those photos...

Ray

[veryserious]

VS,

A little over 3 weeks should just be enough, barely.

If you allow 2 weeks to get all the paperwork out of the way, then have a wedding ceremony, that gives you about a week or so for a honeymoon. Have any plans for the honeymoon?

Get that marriage license application in as soon as possible because that's the biggest holdup. That will give you about 10 days to do all the social formalities, like asking for permission from the parents, meeting all the relatives, etc. You must be getting pretty excited by now.

What kind of ceremony do you have planned? What will you wear? I'm familiar with the traditional Catholic Church weddings in the Philippines, but I know nothing about a traditional Muslim wedding.

Can't wait to see those photos...

Ray

Ray,
I am sorry to disappoint you but the marriage ceremony in Islam is nothing like what you would think of as a wedding. In Islam you must prepare a Nika (which is a marrige contract) this outlines what the bride and groom expect of each other. The groom must provide a gift to the bride called a Maher (she can request what ever she likes) then both parties will make a statement in front of the Iman that the Maher has been paid and they agree to the Nika and they are married. So called  Muslim weddings in general are cultural affaris and have nothing to do with the religion. They are done so that family and friends can celebrate with you.

We will have a civil ceremony and then a Walima (feast or wedding reception) I will most likely wear a barong.
There is a pretty good size Muslim population in Tagum City and they are permitted to have their Nika and then get their license by filing a affidavit that says the were married in a Muslim ceremony. So we plan to take are required seminar upon arrival In Tagum and file the affidavit before I leave. 

[veryserious]

By the way can someone tell me if I must file a I130 for her daughter as well? And if so who would sign the 325a for the Daughter?  She is 4

[Ray]

By the way can someone tell me if I must file a I130 for her daughter as well? And if so who would sign the 325a for the Daughter?  She is 4

Yes, you must file a separate I-130 petition for the daughter as your child (stepchild). File the petitions together in the same envelope.

The G-325A is only required of a husband & wife. The daughter doesn't need the G-325A or the passport photos when you file.

Was your fiancée ever married before?

Ray