IMHO-We Should Consider A Little More Unity

[Zorrowins]

I believe all of us on this board are very different than your average American-USA variety. I personally witness many males-single, alone, unhappy, w/o a mate or even a girlfriend floundering around complaining ALL the time yet refusing to think OR act out of the box! They ridgedly follow the prescribed method of looking for a relationship and refuse to even consider trying anything different! I know I was one of the for several years! Eventually I looked into my soul and asked myself what did I really want in a relationship. I grew up with Latinos & Latinas(Mexicans) in South Texas-spoke spanish asi asi, and dated one lovely Mexican that I probably should have married in my early 20's. Then I discovered this board(not by accident either-I knew what I was doing wasn't working) and you men have been extremely helpful in my quest. I am now engaged to a lovely Latina from Peru and should be married befor next Summer. Here's the bottom line-when I share my experiences with other-Many react like I have two heads! (I do of course! :-) )I get very little if ant support from anyone in the USA outside this board. You see I didn't follow the "rules." Its fine and dandy to be alone and single my whole life with them! I should just hang around with all the other older males and bitch! That's OK! So know I have to put up with people who state-all she wants is a green card, how do you know she's not using you?,etc.

So the bottom line is WE are NOT accepted by the outside and never will be! Including members of our own family! So we should all make more of an effort here to be unified and considerate of one another.

[JimmySTLOUIS]

... in response to IMHO-We Should Consider A Little More Un..., posted by Zorrowins on Dec 16, 2004

I read this board everyday. I dont post all that much. Mainly I post updates on my novia etc.

Its been tempting to jump into the fray on some topics but I have resisted for many of the reasons you mentioned.

I always tried to make it clear that because of the guys on this forum I am getting married next week to a sweet and very cute girl from Peru.

To the person(s) who suggested Peru - I owe you a big thank you. I always appreiate the sincere honest people on this board and look forward (pronto) to posting as someone who is married to a Peruvian girl.

TE AMO PERU!!!!!!!

jim

[Fuzzyone]

... in response to IMHO-We Should Consider A Little More Un..., posted by Zorrowins on Dec 16, 2004

If the person does not just think with his little head this forum is great. There is
so much info to find here. There are several posters here that I know if they did
not help me I would never had got married in Colombia to the woman of my
dreams...

[utopiacowboy]

... in response to IMHO-We Should Consider A Little More Un..., posted by Zorrowins on Dec 16, 2004

Good post, dude. You're right. It's kind of like being members of a secret fraternity. Buena suerte!

[slojas1]

... in response to IMHO-We Should Consider A Little More Un..., posted by Zorrowins on Dec 16, 2004

I am with you on this one. I have been an antagonist to many on the board over the years but for the most part I do admire the guts it takes to think and act outside of the box. I will focus on the positive and say that I have met some great guys over the years and there are a few that I hope to meet sometime in the future (ie UC, Zack, Hoda, Soltero, Kented, Burbu..etc) to name a few. I wish the best of love for you in your relationship. I should post some of the things we take for granted that gave my wife the puzzled look. Automatic flushers, auto sinks, auto hand towels are just a few. The look of wonderment on her face was priceless and these were things I never thought to talk to her about.
As for your thoughts, unity is a good thing for those that are deserving.
Wishing you and yours a safe and happy holiday season.
J

[kented]

... in response to IMHO-We Should Consider A Little More Un..., posted by Zorrowins on Dec 16, 2004

When my wife gets here next week, I can't imagine caring whatother people think.

It will be obvious that I ahve a great looking young wife.  Some people will think she married me for my money or a visa and some will think that I married her because of her outward beauty.  

If you are happy, its too bad there are lots of idiots out there who judge by superficiality.  It's too bad your family doesn't accept your new fiancee or share your happiness.  My sister thinks I am a little loco but she wants me to be happy and wants to meet my wife and children.  

Good luck to you.  The people who don't accept your relationship are the losers.

[lswote]

... in response to IMHO-We Should Consider A Little More Un..., posted by Zorrowins on Dec 16, 2004

Zorro, I have to say Americans, especially American women defy sound logic.  When I was so lonely towards the end of the 4 years I was divorced, I remember openly sharing my lonliness with several women in my bike club at a club breakfast, and was astounded when not a single one offered to introduce me to a single friend, or even just invite me over for dinner with their friends or family, yet several offered to give me the phone number of their shrink so I could work through my lonliness.  This defies common sense.  If you are lonely the goal should be to stop being alone, not learn to accept lonliness.

I know in one of the arguments my Colombian wife and I had she was saying something like "I thought I married a normal husband" (my wife tends to exaggerate in our arguments).  I said that first off she needed to understand that I am not your typical American man because the average American man would not consider going to another country to look for a wife, but while this might mean I am not normal in the strictest definition, in the definition that I am a committed, loving husband who is working very hard on our marriage, then I am very normal.

But as you said Zorro, all of us by definition think somewhat outside the box and approval by others is not something we can seek or expect to get.

[stefang]

... in response to IMHO-We Should Consider A Little More Un..., posted by Zorrowins on Dec 16, 2004

Zorro my friends are almost all married and have the same depressing
symptoms except they wish they were single.

[AnzoNevis]

... in response to IMHO-We Should Consider A Little More Un..., posted by Zorrowins on Dec 16, 2004

I've never quite been able to get a handle on all the inane bashing of each
other. If everyone were such f'n relationship geniuses and Tom Cruise look-
alikes there wouldn't be a need for this board. As for our so-called friends,
uhhhhhh....don't get me started. My best friend, otherwise a great guy,  and I
almost come to blows when he insists that he knows, just KNOWS, the
motivations of me (sex and ego, of course) and the ladies I come in contact
with ($). When there is a simple answer, and the answer is the one someone
wants, it automatically becomes fact for them.  Sure there's some truth to
both assertions. But that would also be true if I was with an AW.  And this
after I was married to a gorgeous Russian for 7 years. The amusing, or
maddening, thing (depending on one's self image) is that many of the same
friends and aquaintances who bad-mouth our efforts with the foreign ladies
will be the same guys who fall all over each other trying to attract your lady's
attention when she arrives. And for you guys who haven't had your woman
here yet, this WILL happen. But I have convinced 2 guys to go overseas. 1 is
now married to a Belarussian and the other engaged to a Ukrainian. Hey, can't
we start a fight on LW and FSUs? Or agencies vs tours? How 'bout "write one,
visit one" vs "write many, visit many"? Or Spanish is vital vs Spanish is
unnecessary? Oh wait, we just did that one. Maybe we should view the board
as a pub rather than a forum. Peace.

Anzo

[CartagenaPapito]

... in response to well spoken, sir, posted by AnzoNevis on Dec 16, 2004

nt