Hello

[nautilus]

Hello, everybody!

I am really glad I found this forum, because I became interested in this topic recently and was searching for a place to hear what others could objectively say about their first-hand experiences.  I am interested in starting correspondence by mail because honestly I think this will give an opportunity to learn about a girl (girls) a lot better.  Besides I can fairly well explain myself in Spanish.  I plan to send about a dozen letters and see if any will respond...  

If possible, I would like honest answers to these three quick questions:

1.   I looked over several sites, and the one I liked the most was ‘Cali’s Best’.  Has anyone used it and what was the experience?

2.   I realize it is probably hard to answer in general terms, but what are these girls on average looking for in terms of social status, income, lifestyle?  I mean I have a professional job, earn quite a bit more than an average person, but I am no millionaire, don’t own a house (I rent a nice but not very large apartment though) and if I marry I do expect my wife to work.

3.   And one more thing; and that’s really my main question.  I am not at all religious: my mother is Russian Orthodox (eastern Christian) and my father jewish, and I consider myself to be jewish but never practice it (nor will I ever demand to practice it from my wife or girlfriend).  Will this present a real difficulty in Colombia?  And if I don’t want to do a wedding in a church will it be reasonably possible to convince the girl and her family of that?  I have dated several latin girls here (from Mexico and Salvador) and this little ‘glitch’ was one of the main reasons our relationships did not work out.  I just feel that the girls who specifically look for foreign guys will be on average a bit more open-minded about cultural/ religious differences.

Well, sorry if this is too long.  THANK YOU in advance for any good advice!

[Cali vet]

... in response to Hello, posted by nautilus on Jan 8, 2004

I'm atheist but agreed to my wife's desire to marry in a Catholic church. After all it was no skin off my nose since I was never asked to say I believe in something I don't. Interestingly it was easier for us to get the church's permission with me as someone "with no religion" who'd never been baptised into any religion than had I been Baptist or something. I guess they saw no "conflict of interest".

[HeyNow]

... in response to Re: Hello, posted by Cali vet on Jan 10, 2004

I guess religion is a personal preference but, don't leave your children alone with a priest.  If you do you are asking for trouble

[valuedcustomer]

... in response to Re: Hello, posted by Cali vet on Jan 10, 2004

That tells you volumes about religion.  They probably assume if there is no competition they get the children.

[nautilus]

... in response to Re: Re: Hello, posted by valuedcustomer on Jan 10, 2004

First of all, I want to thank everyone who responded with info.  I just want to clarify a couple of things, though, so that I am not misunderstood.  

I am not looking for a woman to pay my bills, b/c I can do that fine myself.  It's just I would prefer if in the event of me marrying a girl in Colombia and bringing her here, that she would earn herself for the trips home or any money she would want to send to her family back there, stuff like that.  Besides, I can't imagine what she is going to be doing all day at home.  Watch Univision?  I did not mean at all that she has to work to support me or to pay my bills.

As for the church thing, like I said I am not religious, and besides I am jewish.  If I don't need to convert  or get baptized to do it, than it does not really bother me.  It's just I had no idea of the requirements.

As for the agency, I did find Latin Encounters on the net.  Cali's Best, however, seems to have almost all those girls, too, and its services are much cheaper.  However, I do realize that you usually get what you pay for...  Besides, several of my friends are Colombian and they go there periodically, so I might actually go with them next time.

Well, thanks once again!

[Patrick]

... in response to Hello, posted by nautilus on Jan 8, 2004

I won't make any agency recommendation.  I believe success if far more dependant on the person than the agency he chooses so IMHO it makes little difference.

I'm a little confused as to why a church wedding would be a show stopper.  Unless you feel it's a violation of your own religous convictions (athiest?) I don't see why you would object to it.  Any marriage involves compromise, so why not be flexible on that if it's important to her?

My wife's Catholic and although we initially married in a civil ceremony, we repeated our vows in a church wedding some years later.  We go to church maybe 3-4 times per year and she doesn't insist that I go with her (though I do).  I'm closer to your religous beliefs than I am to her's, but I think it's important to do some things for yourself and some things for your wife in marriage.

I think the others are right in that Catholicism is more a cultural or social thing than a center of of life for most Latinas.  They do tend to see Virgin Mary apparitions often though (she appeared in my wife's mashed potatoes and gravy at Thanksgiving this year).  Just kidding.....

Bottom line is to get to know any woman you get serious with REALLY WELL before you make plans to marry.  That's the hard part.  Harder than you probably realize at this point.

Most men inevitably feel pressure to pull the trigger and get married.  Not necessarily from the woman, but because of the inherent nature of this process.  You'll spend lots time, money, and emotional energy and you'll want it to pay-off.  When red flags appear, you may be tempted to ignore them.  Starting over again from scratch after a year (or more) of effort to develop a relationship can be daunting, but to increase your chances of not just a marriage, but a successful one, you may have to do just that.  Maybe several times.

[Pete E]

... in response to Hello, posted by nautilus on Jan 8, 2004

The main asgencies in Cali are Latin Encounters,Latin Best,
All Colombian Girls and Latin Internet.I think the others are much smaller by comparison.The only one I have personal experience with is Latin Encounters.Margareth has maybe 800 girls,alot more than on her web site.She has another internal site that has more girls and up to 40 pictures of some of them.
An American proffesional is just what these girls are looking for.Any american looks good to them and you will be fine from that standpoint.
Most,not all of these girls I consider only socially religious.Catholocism is part of their culture more than a strict religion for most.It will vary girl by girl.Most do have some sort of religious or spiritual belief in my opinion,but I have never found it too be rigid.
So go for it,your a good candidate.Its a whole different world,toally different than most of us have back home.You will be spoiled for life.

Pete

[DaveyRich1]

... in response to Hello, posted by nautilus on Jan 8, 2004

Just a real quick reply. Latin Best is a good agency a friend of mine swears by it. Luz Amparo is the owner she used to let you pay a weekly rate. The only problem I had their was she does not have a translator on staff but their is usualy someone hanging around that will translate for you for a small fee. My wife started workking within the 1ST month she arrived. I thinks this keeps them from being bored plus she sends money home each month.That is a topic we have discussed many times here.Depending on what part of the country you are in bilingual is very much in demand.We will be in Cali in March.
                      Good Luck
                             Dave

[cancunhound]

... in response to Re: Hello, posted by DaveyRich1 on Jan 9, 2004

Cali's Best is not affiliated with Latin Best.  I haven't heard much about Cali's Best - looks like they may operate out of the Hotel Valle Real judging from the photos?  That's the same hotel Hearts of Cali uses.  As mentioned here many times, don't send a dime until you check it out personally.

[Cali vet]

... in response to Re: Latin Best / Cali's Best, posted by cancunhound on Jan 9, 2004

There was an agency that splintered off Hearts of Cali over a year ago. That may be Cali's best. I didn't think it was still in operation.

[JimmySTLOUIS]

... in response to Hello, posted by nautilus on Jan 8, 2004

Hi

My girl is from Peru so I cant help with the first question.

As far as the church thing my girl (and her friend that is getting married to a gringo this month) prefer to have more of a civil service.
My girl has described her ideal wedding as more of a party type thing with tons of family than a church service.

As far as status guys most girls (in Peru anyway) seem to see a gringo as a preffered commodity and you get a special status no matter what. They really dont seem to be able to sort through your financials and determine if you are upper class or what(?) To them you are way better off then all local men just because you are from the USA.

Most girls seem to be looking for a nice guy - period.

One thing about the women working. I dont know what others say about this but for me - to expect a women to be able to come here and jump right in the work place might be a problem. In other words if you need additional income to pay your bills you would be better off sticking with AM.
I cant see the time frame working out where you could see your Latina girl bringing home a pay check anytime soon.

Best of Luck

Te Amo Peru!

jim

[Fuzzyone]

... in response to Re: Hello, posted by JimmySTLOUIS on Jan 9, 2004

About your girl working... If she knows english good, get her in the
work force as soon as you can because as long as she sits home she will
get bored. That was one of the mistakes I made keep her home while you
work and she gets crazy. Any job will do even Walmart.

[mudd]

... in response to Hello, posted by nautilus on Jan 8, 2004

#1 never used "cali best" so cant answer that one.
#2 every girl is looking for something difrent, some want a rich husband, some want a younger husband, not 45 to 60, im speaking of the younger girls of course. most dont want a over weight husband, weird or how to say this.... strange or freak. most want just a nice, ordinary guy who is not rich, but not making a hugh house payment, hugh car payment, EX wife payment ect, most will not have a problem working, but expect them to send some money home to their family once in a while.
#3 the girls that i have met were not very religious in practicing, but more in heart i guess you could say. i cant see a girl from colombia, brazil, peru ect really haveing too much of a problem with it, if they truely love you. as far as the wedding in a church, well, that might be a little more difficult. i think most girls will want some kind of wedding in a church, but each girl is diffrent and i think you would have to discuss this with the girls you meet. good luck and dont worry about offending someone on here, we all do it, even me :-)