... in response to Age Differences, posted by littlebhuddha on Sep 27, 2002

I have read and reread these responses and I can say that the insight I have received is impressive. It has given me a lot to think about. It really has more to do with common sense than age difference. I really appreciate all the input. It was a bit confusing for a newcomer. I think a trip to Cali will be the first thing on my agenda. What is the period of Dec 26 to Jan 8 like for travel to Cali? As I don't want to take my first trip to SA alone I will likely be taking a tour. Any suggestions? Thanks again for all the input. Is Carlos Santana popular in Columbia?

... in response to Re: Age Differences, posted by littlebhuddha on Sep 29, 2002

I don't know first hand what Cali is like in Dec. because this will be the first time I have ever traveled to Cali in Dec. But, I have heard the feria de Cali is great. I will be in Cali from Dec. 19 thru the 27th except for the the 23rd I will be in Bogota. If you are open to traveling on the 19th I can give you my flight info. Also I wouldn't go on a tour because you will most likely get locked into just one agency. If you really feel like a tour is the best thing then for a nominal fee I can take you on a tour of every worth while agency in the north part of Cali and show you the full range of oportunities available to you. Safety guaranteed. Also I don't recommend that you stay at the agencies if you plan on getting to know any of the ladies intimately or if you would like to date more than one women at a time. So if you like, I can give you the hotel info. where I will be staying and you can stay there also.

             Wayne

... in response to Age Differences, posted by littlebhuddha on Sep 27, 2002

Many women ,particularly in Cali,will go way beyond what their profile says in age acceptability,particularly  if the guy still looks good.Their ideal may be what they said in their profile ,but they have to compare that to nothing at all.Girls 30 saying they want 35.Well the 35 year old guys are going for 25-.So the 30 year old might have to stetch it to find someone.I would say you can add about 10 years to what their profile says if other factors are right.Looks,personality,affluence.This is Cali.Bogota I don't know.I think 10 years difference would not be a problem there even if they say not.From recent stories I have heard it sounded like guys were competing for girls who would get no attention at all in Cali.But there were 21 guys there at one agency after that last tour.Another reason to avoid tours.There might be 21 gringos sometimes at all the agencies in Cali.When I stayed at Latin Love in December 1999 there were 4 guys in an 18,000 sq. ft. mansion.It was the hot place in Cali at the time.600-800 girls on the books.Thats 150-200 to one.

Pete

... in response to Age Differences, posted by littlebhuddha on Sep 27, 2002

Big age differences can be a problem.  It depends a lot on the younger party.  Then again, people of roughly the same age get divorced all the time, so do your odds improve much?  Every couple is different.

In my case, I chose poorly.  My ex was using me for residency and I ignored the warning signs because I was infatuated with her.  She even put a desired age range of 25-30 on her info sheet, but I ignored it.  Do so at your own peril.

My warning to you is:

You say you are looking for women in the range of 34-45.  That's certainly a realistic expectation.  But when you arrive in Colombia and find that you can date the beautiful 21 year olds, you may get swept away, too.  Don't underestimate the power of the cute young latinas.

Meanwhile, I'm 46 and my fiancee is 28.  I'm still pushing the envelope a little, but she keeps chasing me and I'm not seeing any warning signs.  She seems sincere.

Steve

... in response to Age Differences, posted by littlebhuddha on Sep 27, 2002

As a newcomer to this your pre existing notions about age are in for an overhall.Your still looking at it from your experience in the US.
First let me say I think Bogota is not represenitive of the rest of central and South america.It is much closer to the United States in attitude.Why this is is I'm not sure but I suspect it is because the supply and demand situation is closer to the US than the other latin countries of the area.
Cali may be the extreme but I think it is much closer to the norm for the area.The supply demand balence is heavily in favor of the gringo.Don't look at population statistics,
look at agency statistics.At any one time there are probably no more than 40 gringos in Cali looking for mates.There are probably 4000+ ladies on the books.Most will never even get an interview with a gringo let alone landing one.
So how does this affect the age situation?When I went the first time I was amazed to see 40 something guys chasing and dating 18-22 year old girls.I don't think this is a good idea not so much because of the age difference as the extremely young age of the girls.Even though they do tend to be much more mature than US girls the same age they are still young enough to change their minds alot about what they may want in the future.
Another factor is your percieved age vs your calender age.Some 49 year olds look 60,so look 35,appearance and attitude can vary alot.In my case I was 56 at the time and did a little quiz with people.Most guessed me 45.Now maybe this is just self deception,but I think its so and makes a difference.My wife was 33 when I met her.I think she is beautifull.She had been at the agency 6 months and I was her first interview.Most guys were not looking for 33 with a child.I was not looking for any younger than 27 and only looked there for lack of many over 30 year olds I liked.And I definetly wanted to have no more babies.This made me incompatable with 90% of the girls who wanted more babies.
We have been married 2 1/2 years.Not only is my wife beautifull but she is a very good person.I am now 59(people judge me late 40's)she is 36,looks about 30.So we have a 23 year age difference.As you can tell I don't think it is insanity at all.Insanity to me is putting up with American women attitudes and odds after discovering a hugely better alternative.I even saw an article in Cosmopolitan recently where they were telling women about the great odds  and how to dump guys when they decided they could do better.No thank you.
We are friends with 4 other gringo/Colombiana couples.One couple is 42/22.Very mature 22 year old fortunately,even though she looks 17.Another couple is 47/24.Both very attractive people.Both of these couples are married over a year and doing fine.I don't see any warning signs of problems.The other 2 couples are closer to the same age.8 years diffence and almost no difference.Again doing fine.
Fortunately nobody landed a trouble girl here.If you watch out for red flags and don't let their beauty dumb you dowm you can avoid trouble girls also.Its not so difficult if your judgement remains intact.
So I say forget Bogota,recent stories indicate a much worse supply demand and attitude situation and go where the better possibilities are,Cali.One trip and you will find your old notions about age changed forever.I still think 30 -38 year old women are the best bet though for a guy well in to his 40's.If you are just 40 25 might be ok.21 a risk but possible,as with my friends.
Now if you are 35 or so you will be more popular than older guys.If you are 25- you will be suspect for maturity and responsibility,they may compare you to the last Colombiano experience they had,which was not good or we wouldn't be meeting them.
So hop a plane.You will be changed forever.Its the happy hunting ground,died and gone to heaven.No amount of long distance mails or analysis compares with it.Pick a good agency,meet lots of women.Avoid ones with any red flags.Avoid wasting time with ones you are not interested in or who show less than very high interest in you.Be smart and your success is almost guaranteed.It might take one trip.It might take 4.More than that I would guess you like going more than finding or you are doing something wrong,like wasting a whole trip on 1-3 women you have been mailing but who you don't click with.
Go south not so young man,go south.

Pete

... in response to She's not in Cali anymore, posted by DallasSteve2 on Sep 28, 2002

I visited Cali twice and found women from 18 - 45 very willing to get to know me. I was 44 at the time (46 now)and I am in great shape and I always get the "you look 10 years younger" response when I tell my age to others. You have to trust your instincts and be true to yourself. A younger woman is a work in progress. Do you have the time and energy to help her through the growth cycle. If so, more power to you. If not, try someone closer to your age. I had so many problem deciding, that I did something crazy, I married a AW. Big Mistake!!! I will be back in SA very soon.
Sign me,
Crazy One
JAY

... in response to She's not in Cali anymore, posted by DallasSteve2 on Sep 28, 2002

Steve,
Another point.If the girl likes to go to the bars with her friends without you you got trouble.Particularly if she is young she might be thinking she missed something by marrying you.And if she thinks that its true for her.Bars are where attractive girls really discover the opportunities here.
My wife will not go to bars with her girlfriends.No interest at all.Guys hit on her all the time.If they just say you are very beautifull she says "oh,thank you."If they really keep after her she gets offended and runs."I am a married woman,please respect that."Guys follow her around the grocery store.She gets scared and figures out how to distance herself.

Pete