Whats the goal?

[stezo]

If you needed financial advice and you could get a free consultation with Warren Buffet or a bum on the street who are you going to listen to? The point? If your goal is to marry a beautiful, sweet latina is it more beneficial to listen to guys who are married to one or guys who have been to Colombia dozens of times call themselves expert,vet etc.. yet for whatever reason have yet to acheive the goal of marriage (assuming thats there goal) Everybody is entitled to their opinion and its nice to hear them and if you want advice on going to Colombia to have fun and meet alot of hot women its probably a good idea to listen to that advice. The reason for this rant is because all these guys are bashing these agencys but I sincerly doubt that the reason they havent been able to find the right woman is because of any agency. If Latin Encounters only has unavailable women or "ringers" why is it that I personally know besides myself 4 guys that are happily married to women from there including Wayne? Now I agree that you better have your mind on your wallet at all times when there but the point Im getting at is its ridiculous to blame the agencys for failing to meet somebody. If your having trouble meeting the so called "ringers" maybe you should ask yourself why you only accept these drop dead type looking women anyway. From the 4 guys I mentioned including myself all have very attractive wives but not the type you put on your agency homepage to attract new customers. Maybe the reason these guys are happily married to these beautiful, sweet latinas is they actually went down with the intention of meeting someone who they could possibly marry and not just meet the hottest woman they saw on the website and then call them ringers when there not available when it reality the woman probably has low interest in meeting them because a hundred other gringos saw that same picture and have already pursued her.

[Ted]

... in response to Whats the goal?, posted by stezo on Jul 17, 2002

For the ones that are married, why don't we give them some time to see if they still married after a few months. Just because they got married shouldn't mean to take everything they say as gospel. Do we have to remind people how often some marriages end in divorce usually in less than 2 years?

[stezo]

... in response to Re: Whats the goal?, posted by Ted on Jul 17, 2002

I dont think you should take everything Anyone is saying as the gospel. My point is simple if you are trying to accomplish something is it wise to listen to someone who has yet to accomplish what your goal is. I think alot of guys who havent found success in this spend alot of time discouraging others by bashing the agencys (or whatever)when in fact the problems there having have nothing to do with that. Maybe you will disagree but it has been my experience that when someone fails in something they dont want to see anyone succeed in it either. I dont see your point about how often marriages fail when thats a problem with all marriages not just international ones.

[pastilla100]

... in response to Whats the goal?, posted by stezo on Jul 17, 2002


I think we are all getting away from the real issue.  Either these agencies are using women as "ringers" or they are not.  That is a question of fact and doesn't depend on anyone's emotional outlook and stating what exists isn't necessarily "blame".  I have been told that such and such a woman is available and when I get there told she has a boyfriend, dropped out, is married, and so forth.  I think the temptation to keep one of the pretty ones on a little longer than necessary is overwhelming.  If you want to be factual about this, then the way to proceed is to not be talked into going down and meeting someone until you have their address and phone number and actually talk to them.  I also don't think whether anyone "successfully" married a Latin Woman means they are any better at telling whether a fact is true or not.  Even the most hopeless among us could find a woman in one of these agencies to marry us.  If you do decide to use an agency, it would be in your best interest to understand all of the negatives in advance and go down there with your eyes open and prepared to be a hard-nosed negotiator.  As for me, I am happily avoiding the whole scene and using non-agency methods.    

[colombian]

... in response to Re: Whats the goal?, posted by pastilla100 on Jul 17, 2002

yo pienso que ne la villa del senor ahy de todo.
no todo lo que brilla es oro,yo lo se por experiencia y en algunos casos algunos tiene la razon aqui ahy muchas mujeres falsas,pero siempre es mejor hacerle caso al corazon que ala gente,ahy muchas personas y muchas chicas que hablan muy mal de otras y en la ora de la verdad las que relamente no sirven son las que relamente hablan muy mal de las otras,claro eso siempre se ve mucho mas en las jovenes pero ahy jovenes muy locas y ala hora de la verdad son muy srias en una relacion solo todo depende,pero yo e visto muchos casos de divorcios y es mujeres que en colombia aparentan ser una cosa y en realidad son otras  y no quiero ofender con esto a nadie pero es la verdad,y fijesen en la amyoria de los divorcios cuando ahy aqui es porque en muchas de las agencias les han metido alas mujres por los ojos y porque ahcen eso porque son muy amigos de ellos como se dicen la rosca,nada mas ahy veces muchos ni deciden que es lo que quieren si no que se dejan a consejar muy mal y esa es la verdad,yo solo pienso que para todo eso ahy que tener mucho ojo,y esperaR QUE DICE EL CORAZON Y DARSE TIEMPO aunque en la muchos casos los noviazgos cortos duran mas,que un noviazgo a largo plazo,solo creo que lo mas importante es la quimica y la buena comunicacion y la confianza del uno al otro y no importar el que diran,pero si es verdad ahy muchas demasiadas chicas falsas,pero tambien los hombres,bueno gracias a dios digo de nuevo nada de esto me a pasado ami pero e lido mucho esta pagina y saben a que me refiero espero no ofender aninguno aqui un beso y que dios les bendiga,con amor:la colombiana

[Pete E]

... in response to Re: Whats the goal?, posted by pastilla100 on Jul 17, 2002

We have one agency here recently accused of using ringers.I think the guys are probably correct about this.Some others may not be so blatant but may be slow to remove the pictures of the really hot looking girls.I think some of the "wholesalers" agencies that don't have an agency are probably more guilty of this.We have at least 3 other major agencies in Cali I have not heard this about,although it may happen.
Unless you are fairly young and attractive yourself you are probably better off avoiding  the girls that even look like they could be ringers.Even if they are for real good chance they are getting spoiled and in to using like their AW sisters.When people say be realistic I always hesitate a little,because what is realistic in Cali is a whole lot better than what is realistic here,but going for the hottest looking chick may be problimatic.Go for it if you like,but keep your eyes open and don't be surprised if it doesn't work out.
But ringer or not this is just a few girls in the agency.There are lots of other great girls that get overlooked.So don't let this put you off of agencies,the easiest way to meet women.There are thousands of sincere girls being overlooked here.
And don't expect to pick out the best looking girl,get way ahead of yourself in your head and expect her to be available when you show up.Even if she is you may soon decide she is bad news(I did this).I would say don't get ahead of yourself at all untill you actually meet the girl.
So just go,there are lots of girls to meet,you can't try to control it in advance without even meeting them.Don't even waste any energy on that.
There are problems with agencies,but they can be easily avoided and you can use their advantages.
But I guess each person has to pick his path.I just get concerned guys will take a low percentage route,get fed up and quit without ever seeing what is really available.I have seen this happen.The guy might almost have stayed home for all his approach got him.To go to Cali and not meet as many attractive women as you have time for is a shame.Because it is so easy to do.
Maybe I'm just judging it from my own perspective and think other guys may be like me.I know I am not going to go out and meet any women in malls unless I hire a Colombian to approach them and introduce us.Its just not me.Hitting on girls who most likely are not interested or already married or involved is a low percentage game ,even in Cali.I am in sales,but I do no cold calls,(cold callers should be shot)don't knock on doors,I set it up so people call me.I really liked the agency route,choose who you want to meet after you have read a little about them and what they want and if it fits what you want,just meet alot of them(it was the easiest thing in the world).You don't know untill you meet them,even if you E-mailed them for months,so meet alot of women and just let it happen naturarly.
But whatever works.I have no problem with anybody's approach if it works for them.But if you go to Cali and don't meet all the attractive women you have time for you missed something I think.

Pete

[stezo]

... in response to Re: Whats the goal?, posted by pastilla100 on Jul 17, 2002

I agree if they are using ringers thats wrong and they shouldnt do it. The fact is there are hundreds of beautiful women and to look at a website and say "hey theres alot of beautiful  women at this agency let me go down and meet some and see if I find someone whos compatible" seems rational. To find one or two incredibly gorgeous girls on a website become fixated on them and then travel all the way to Colombia to meet them merely by how good they look on the site seems crazy. If you have a method of meeting women differently then thru an agency thats great. I maintain tho that the agency is only introducing you to women and you have to use your own judgement from there anyway. I think that if you want to meet one sweet, beautiful woman who cares if a couple on there website arent available? You can only be married to one woman anyway. The bottom line is if you sincerly want to meet "ONE" good woman it doesent matter how many "ringers" there are because there are still many, many quality women there that you just dont find here.

[H2Oh]

... in response to Re: Re: Whats the goal?, posted by stezo on Jul 17, 2002

Let's take a look at the odds as I see them. An agency may have 400 chicas. Out of 400 chicas the typical guy will pick 10 to 15 girls. Of these ladies he will choose 4 or 5 that really interests him and of the 4 or 5 maybe 2 or 3 will be interested in him. So the odds of finding the right lady is 1/2 of 1 percent!!! It can be done, you can find her,but you have to be patient and make more then a few visits to the country of your choice. It seem harder today then 2 or 3 years ago when agencys where fresher. The girls have learned that gringo's = money. These of course are the girls that are not serious but are great looking and have no interest in marrying. The challenge in great but the reward is greater. I speak from first hand experience...right Pete.

H2-Oh

[Pete E]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Whats the goal? The odds, posted by H2Oh on Jul 17, 2002

Howie,
Reasonably attractive,50% chance first trip.Georgious with no problems,maybe you got it right.
When I went to Latin Love they had about 600 women in the books.Finding 200 reasonably attractive ones is possible,depending on your standards,but other factors came in that caused me to cut the list down.I went thinking no one under 30 but shopped down to 27.But the biggest limitation for me was I didn't want to have more babies.Most of the women want kids or more kids.A woman with a child was OK,which is what I found.Even the women with kids said they wanted more kids sometimes.Ruby said if they are over 30 and have a kid already its usually not important.Rocio's page said she wanted one more kid.When I talked to her she said it would be OK yes or no.What I found out is she doesn't want more kids(perfect for me).
When she joined the agency Bud was there and told her to say she wanted another child because he thought that was what most guys wanted.She also listed her height at 5'6" and she didn't make my first cut where I limited it to 5'5".I found so few I changed the height and age standard.She is 5'3",again perfect for me.She also said she was 31.She was 33,again fine with me.
For a guy late 30's who wants kids almost all the women would fit that goal.Then you have to choose age and looks.
Now my excuse for finding only 15 women was the age and the child thing.I think you were looking for extremely attractive,which I must say you found.
Even if you narrow it down to 15 from 600 there are 4 or 5 more agencies to go to.That could get your list up to 80 or so.I was going to hit them all and then to go to  Bogota after that and then I met Rocio.I knew day one I would keep at it untill I found the woman I was looking for.
The odds may be 4000 girls on the books,30 gringos in town,but depending on your desires most guys narrow it down to a few girls.I still think there are some great girls out there untaped that may just have a bad picture.My brother in laws sister was like that.Her picture was not good but she looks very good in person.We told her to go get proffesional photos and join all the agencies.
My theory.If you are looking for a nice girl who looks  attractive you got a good chance of finding her in one trip.If you are looking for a georgious girl with no problems you could be shopping awhile.Or worse yet find out about the problems a little late.

Pete

[Wayne1]

... in response to 1/2 of 1% ?   Somebody a  little picky?, posted by Pete E on Jul 18, 2002

These %s are interesting to play with but I think they are completely worthless.

It's all about fate, God, destiny, or whatever you want to call it.

You may very well meet the women of your dreams on the plane down there, and finish your search before you even step onto the tarmack.

Just because you have taken multiple trips, gone to several agencies, and dated many girls, it doesn't mean the 57th girl you met has any more value, or quality then the 1st girl you meet off the plane.  The very 1st girl you meet could be the one.

And this business about writing cracks me up.  Not using an agency and writing...  I guess it could be done, and has been done.  But considering the experience I had down there, I just can't believe that can be time well spent.  I met so many girls that were beautiful and I knew in less then 5 minutes it wasn't going to fly.  Some 10 seconds or less.  So why spend 3 months writing to all these girls when you are  most likely going to decide that it isn't going to work in 2 minutes after the 1st meeting.  

There is so much made out about these "agency" girls.  I believe most of these girls join out of curiosity the same as why some of us go down there.

I think the vast majority of the girls at agencies are just normal girls looking for a partner just like us.  We have trouble finding good women in the US, and they have the same problem with the men in Colombia.  It's a perfect match. I actually like the fact that the girl at the agency has taken the step forward to maybe change her life.  It shows motivation.  I mean geez, if I'm going to spend the money and time to go to a semi dangerous country to find a mate, I at least want to find someone who is motivatied too.

There are so many girls, it just doesn't matter if there are some ringers, or "bait" put on the sites.  If there weren't enough other nice girls, then it would be a problem, but that is just not the case.

And I will agree with Pete about the drop dead gorgeous ones.  My Russian wife became a model for a top agency after she came to the states.  She was simply amazing looking.  But what a bubble head she was.  My Colombian wife could not model, but she is extremely beautiful.  But she also has a brain.

Wayne

[Pete E]

... in response to Re: 1/2 of 1% ?   Somebody a  little pic..., posted by Wayne1 on Jul 18, 2002

Wayne,
A German Philospher named Goethe put it in words,although I don't remember exactly how he said it.He was talking about commitment,but starting anything with faith and a desire for the outcome works similarly.
He said,roughly,"One a person commits,all sort of events and circumstances that could never be immagined are put in motion that assist in the fullfillment of that commitment(desire,endeavour).Commitment has power,magic and providence in it."This could be rationalized as when you become interested in something you notice things about it you might have missed,it is everywhere.I personally think there is a spiritual element,as in God but not limited to a Male personality in the sky.Not only are you drawn to your desire,that desire having a compatible desire is also drawn to you.
In other words when we desire and act we also draw to ourselves other people and events that are in alignment with that desire.If you think about how something wonderfull in your life came about it is usually quite amazing.Our lives are intertwined in a magical sort of way.We create life,collectively,every day.
So yeah,don't try to figure it out or control it.Go for your desire with commitment and it can happen in ways you never immagined.
I used to think life was a big crap shoot,just up to happenstance.A fork in the road,flip a coin,just chance.I now think its much more created  by us  and our desires,wishes,commitments.
I have never been big on writing,not only does it bore me but it is missing a personal element(and that magic something) that is present when you actually meet someone.
And I think guys who go down south many times and find no one are unclear and uncommited in what they are looking for.The desire to look or play or not be commited is stronger than the desire to find someone.It doesn't have to be difficult or hard if you know what you want and sincerely seek it,and listen to your inner guidance and intuition.
I met a guy when I first went down who seemed like the ultimate player.He had about 5 girls going at once,would make a date with 2 at the same time and stand one up.He searched for about 3 years total,married this girl and it lasted 2 months.Karma perhaps?Or confusion about what he was looking for?Or like people drawn to each other?
Another saying I like,from "The Prophet"By Kahlil Gabran
"And think not you can guide the course of love,for love,if it finds you worthy,shall guide your course."
I always say just get on the plane,but I think you need to first get clear about what you are really looking for.You don't have to know how it will happen or control it,just point yourself in the right direction.

Pete

[Edge]

... in response to Faith,God,Destiny, posted by Pete E on Jul 18, 2002

Vision without action is a daydream.  Action without vision is a nightmare..

[markxport]

... in response to Re: Re: Whats the goal?, posted by stezo on Jul 17, 2002

n/t

[Darkstar]

... in response to Whats the goal?, posted by stezo on Jul 17, 2002

My sentiments exactly.

Thanks,

Tim.