packs trip # 6

[pack]

well its Sunday morning Betty and i catch a cab to L's casa as we approch the home im a little nervous but it quickly goes away when i see my little friend come running towards me. he jumps in my arms and gives me a big kiss, he is all smiles and so happy to see me and im very happy to see him. L walks out the door and towards me she looks good to me, shes put on a few pounds since my last visit but she still looks great to me. as she gets closer i see she doesnt seem to be overly excited to see me , she gives me a peck on the cheek we get in the cab and drive to Cosmo centro.

during the drive to cosmo she is questioning Betty, how long has he been here , wheres he staying, why didnt he call me sooner, has he seen other women etc? wow poor Betty getting the third degree. as we walk in the mall she seems to be walking a half step ahead of me not showing me much attention ...i believe this is known as the cold shoulder? the boy is happy as can be skipping at times hugging me , holding my hand, wanting to be close to me. we sit at a resturant  they inform us they arent open . we get up walk around looking for another place to eat and talk shes still not showing me much acknowledgement, its actually quiet ..no one is saying anything. we find another place , sit down and order sandwiches, coffee and juice.

immediately she starts off with more questions for me i answer them. i ask her some questions she answers them. then here it comes the finger pointing , she lets me know how much i disappointed her and how im the bad guy, etc. yeah yeah the guy is always the bad guy , were all dogs iv heard this before. can we just put this all behind us im here now we should be talking about now and the future not this blame game, finger pointing stuff. she agrees but 2 minutes later shes back on the subject again at one point she says why did you wait so long to call me, i of course responded with why did you dump me in March . she says you are seeing other women arent you, i respond with why are your photos in half the agencies in cali? she was shocked that i knew this she became silent.

we all sat there for 2 hours and this is how it went poor Betty was translating like crazy ..she earned her money that day!! towards the end conversation we were both calming down and the conversation became more civil. we got up and started walking around the mall at one point she reached over and held my hand and smiled at me...i began melting right there on the spot.we decided to go to latin internet to talk more and watch the game ( this is the big game between colombia and mexico for the title) .

one plug here for Betty at Latin Internet she is a excellent translator , she not only does translating a LI she also freelances . so if you need a good translator call Betty at LI.

we all arrive at LI and walk inside almost immediately L turns to Betty and starts talking in spanish. Betty tells me L has to go home she'll see you tomorrow. what???! i thought we were going to spend the day together ...whats up? well she has plans to be with her friends for the game. o k let me get this straight i fly 7000 miles to see her , i set aside a full day to be with her and the boy and she agrees to spend the day with me ...but now all the sudden she has to be with her friends instead of me. yep thats about it!! o k heres cab fare see ya! the boy is a little confused too he hugs me goodbye. at this point i am soooo pissed off i can hardly contain myself, im trying to keep a straight face. as she walks down the driveway i think to myself...same ole L , this is exactly an example why we cant seem to get together...selfishness.

i talk with Betty about this she doesnt have any answers or doesnt want to get involved. i go to poolside and talk with Ken and Cali-vet tell them what just happened, they offer some advice and then the stories start we are telling stories about guys who have come to cali and left unsatisfied.at this point i am feeling very alone and down. all the sudden Betty yells out the window..Pack! Pack! its L shes on the phone she wants to talk to you!

[rafael]

... in response to packs trip # 6, posted by pack on Aug 18, 2001

Sometimes when you meet ladies that take you on a "roller coaster" ride, there is a reason. You might very well be plan B or plan C. If they have other Gringos or even Colombians interested or dating them, you get the cold shoulder etc.

If the other interests disappear, they become warm and friendly and call their "backup plans". Notice how L really wanted to watch the game with her "friends"? Friends bail without her, so she calls you? By agreeing to see her again, you are promoting the idea that you are cool with being "plan B".

Also women can sense when you are "alone and down". If they want to, they can play some serious games with someone that is "wounded".

I believe that being lonely or depressed,when heading south can be a recipe for disaster.

I can't wait to see how it turns out.

[pack]

... in response to roller coster, posted by rafael on Aug 19, 2001

i could be a plan B but i dont think so, at least at this point i dont think so. however you are right i did not appreciate the little incident where she ask to come back to LI if id remove the frown ...dam right i was frowning i'd just been dumped for her friends, why didnt she dump her friends for me? ! this showed me how important i was to her i was in this case plan B and i didnt like it one bit! up to that point i was very interested in recovering this relationship but to be pushed aside for friends and a game was degrading . i swallowed my pride and moved on to damage control.

[rafael]

... in response to Re: roller coster, posted by pack on Aug 19, 2001

I didn't mean that Plan A had to be another guy. As you said, in this case Plan A was her "friends". My number one prerequisite I look for in a Lady is, she has to REALLY love me. I must be the most important person in her life as she will be in mine. I would never put my friends before my wife, and would not accept being put in second place for anyone. YMMV.

By moving on to damage control as you put it, you are sending her the signal that you will put up with being plan B. All that will get you is more time on the second string.
Women can sense "loneliness", "emptiness" and "desperation" in men. If they do, they know they can pretty much have their way with you.

[Villa in Cali]

... in response to packs trip # 6, posted by pack on Aug 18, 2001

I can also highly recommend Betty, she has worked for me in the past at the Villa and is a good friend.  

Pacino

[pack]

... in response to Re: packs trip # 6, posted by Villa in Cali on Aug 18, 2001

yea shes great isnt she!

[El Diablo]

... in response to packs trip # 6, posted by pack on Aug 18, 2001

Good report, keep it coming Pack.  I've run into some L types before in Cali, they kind of run hot and cold and you have a hard time understanding their interest.  I think the best thing to do in these cases, is to move on and as quickly as possible.  Most guys who come to Cali only have a week or two and it's just a waste of time to work through these kind of games.  When a guy meets a girl who is truly interested in knowing him, he'll know it and there will not be ambivalance on her part.  I've wasted a few weeks of my time here and there chasing gals like this, sometimes they can be quite intriguing but it's better in my opinion to move on.

El Diablo

[cdrab]

... in response to Re: packs trip # 6, posted by El Diablo on Aug 18, 2001

El Diablo
 only problem with knowing and moving on is that your first trip you are so overwellned with the beauty, the accents, the fact that these girls all seem to be interested in you,
Lets also not forget the way the girls dress. I think that if you can even remember your name after your first week there you are probably doing good.LOL

Clint

[El Diablo]

... in response to Re: Re: packs trip # 6, posted by cdrab on Aug 18, 2001


I hear what you're saying about the first trip, it can be pretty unbelievable.  I must admit to not having much of a clue at that time but what a roller-coaster ride it was.  (-:

[pack]

... in response to Re: Re: packs trip # 6, posted by cdrab on Aug 18, 2001

funny you should say that, i feel the same way ...the first few days there is fine then about day 4 or 5 all the days start running together and you forget what day it is , whats going on , whose who, etc.

[H2-Oh]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: packs trip # 6, posted by pack on Aug 18, 2001

I remember the first time I went to Latin Love and met Sandra. those where the days when everything was new and exciting and a big adventure. Enjoy yourself and keep your eyes open and don't waste time on chicas that are indifferent and unsure of what they want. Good Luck.

H2-Oh

[pack]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: packs trip # 6, posted by H2-Oh on Aug 19, 2001

good advice H2-OH . the story gets even better!

[pack]

... in response to Re: packs trip # 6, posted by El Diablo on Aug 18, 2001

Ken and Cali-vet said almost the samething to me.

[cdrab]

... in response to packs trip # 6, posted by pack on Aug 18, 2001

Excellent story. You are doing a great job of telling us your experience. Man does your story bring back memories.
Can hardly wait for the rest of the story.
Clint

[pack]

... in response to Excellent story., posted by cdrab on Aug 18, 2001

thanks , this is only the beginning , you are not gonna believe some of the experiences i had in cali. yes, i have several guys tell me this is like reading their own trip report.