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Author Topic: My Ukraine Lady has US Visa but needs tickets  (Read 9455 times)
BruceJet
Guest
« on: November 04, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
I have been following your board since I started corresponding with RW. This forum has definitely given me knowledge and insights to pursue the ONE.

So now I would like to seek your advice on a Ukrainian Lady that I have been corresponding for 3 months.

She's a professional and works for a private company in Dnepro. We started writing/calling/corresponding 3 months ago and since I could not go to Ukraine within the shortest amount of time, decided that she comes here. Although it was a long shot, she was able to convince her boss to write her invite letters, etc.

And so yesterday she got her US visa! Great, yes!

but the problem is, she said she does not have money for plane tickets. I asked her how much the plane ticket would cost--and she said about $800. Hmmm...all these months though, I was on the impression that I would split the travel bill with her should she be able to come here. SO it came to me as a shocker.

Furthermore, all these 3 months, she never asks for money. Even her visa and trip costs to Kiev from Dnepro by train, she did it on herself (approx US$150).

We have been very close to each other and I have no reason not to trust her. However, wisdom suggest that I must be careful since I havent met her face to face.

THose are the positives--negatives would be this:

Would a honorable lady ask me to pay for the whole trip without her forking any amount? much less without even meeting face to face.

She also said she does not have any savings at all.

How would you guys handle this given the above situation.

Would very much appreciate your thoughts on this.
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wsbill
Guest
« Reply #1 on: November 06, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to My Ukraine Lady has US Visa but needs ti..., posted by BruceJet on Nov 4, 2002

I can't believe so many guys are responding to this post.
There ain't NO WAY this is happening...Visa are a non-existant thing.

For one thing, this guys penmanship stinks.  It reeks, the words don't jive or flow.

Great gag!!

And don't forget to send her the money!!! LOL
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BURKE89
Guest
« Reply #2 on: November 06, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: You guys are being had................., posted by wsbill on Nov 6, 2002

you've the right, to malign anyone's grammar or penmanship.
Vaughn
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Alfred
Guest
« Reply #3 on: November 06, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: You guys are being had................., posted by wsbill on Nov 6, 2002

um, uh, Bill, KenC has alledgedly been faxed a copy of the visa.  KenC has not said otherwise.  Therefor, I believe the visa exists.

What her intentions are, I can not say...
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WmGo
Guest
« Reply #4 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to My Ukraine Lady has US Visa but needs ti..., posted by BruceJet on Nov 4, 2002

It is probably a scam due to the improbablility that any FSUW can obtain such a visa.

Test her: request that she fax you a copy of the visa and if she produces such a document confirm it with the issuing authority. The proof is in the pudding.

Also, it seems that some kind of tickets could be purchased that would provide some kind of protection if they are not used by her (assuming the visa is legit).

2 kopecs are worth a ruble of prevention.
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Robert D
Guest
« Reply #5 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to My Ukraine Lady has US Visa but needs ti..., posted by BruceJet on Nov 4, 2002

Pay for the ticket, so what is not that much money.   Buy it yourself, and make sure it is refundable.  If she fails to show, so what, you get your money back.   If she comes here or you go there the cost to you will be the same, perhaps less if she comes here as you will not have to pay hotel and transportation expenses.  So if it bombs, you are out a small amount of money.  I suspect she could not afford half the fare.  What is her income.

Robert D.
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KenC
Guest
« Reply #6 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to My Ukraine Lady has US Visa but needs ti..., posted by BruceJet on Nov 4, 2002

[This message has been edited by KenC]

Bruce,
You seem to be getting some flak here because your situation is unusual.  Having your RW come to the US is in some ways the ideal situation.  Unless you were planning on moving to Ukraine, your relationship will be based in the US and therefore time spent here will be most valuable.  I for one think that the most critical time in these relationships are the time immediatly following the arrival of the RW to America.  How the woman will react once here, is much more important than how they acted in their home country.  Sometimes it ain't pretty either.  I know of a Ukrainian girl that grew up dirt poor in a small village that has become the most materialistic person I have ever met.  She is now a borderline prostitute with a price tag on evrything.
-
Getting to know her here is not without risk though.  Will she fall in love with you or life in America?  This is a question that we ALL worry about, but the risk will be much greater should you bring her here first.  She will be able to experience the "prize" (living in America)first hand instead of it being a more abstract concept.  My guess is that you will not be able to resist the opportunity to bring her here.  In the same position, most of us would do the same.  Verify that she does indeed have a visa & passport.  A simple fax could accomplish that.  Buying her ticket and costs of her visit should fall 100% on you.  Be smart though and make sure her ticket can only be used for the intended travel.  Best of luck to you.
KenC
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sfcolorado
Guest
« Reply #7 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to My Ukraine Lady has US Visa but needs ti..., posted by BruceJet on Nov 4, 2002

Here are the facts about this that you should be aware of...

1)  Visitors visas to the United States are nearly impossible for Ukrainian citizens to acquire.  Generally speaking, the only people who live there that could manage it are the highly affluent, maybe the wealthiest 2% of the population.

2)  Although it is theoretically possible for someone like her to actually get a visa (and theoretical is all this is), to actually get one in the short time span of 3 months would be quite the challenge even for someone who qualifies for one.  (To give you a clue... I am currently involved in the fiance visa process, the only particularly legit way of getting a visa for someone over there, and I'm almost 5 months down the line with no clear end in site).

3)  This type of scam is not at all new.  It's a fairly common one that is used to extract money from unsuspecting guys like yourself.

My advise... DON'T EVEN CONSIDER IT!!!  If you are going to pursue this further (and I would be highly leery at this point), go to visit her in her own country.  If you send her $800 for a plane ticket, I would bet the farm that you will never hear from her again.
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KenC
Guest
« Reply #8 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to sorry to say, but I can 'almost' guarant..., posted by sfcolorado on Nov 5, 2002

SF,
I know that "almost" only counts in horseshoes and hand granades but stranger sh!t happens.  Using your logic, I would not have encouraged a RW to request a student visa to America some four years ago.  Student visas are as impossible to get as tourist visas are.  It would NEVER work.  Oh, I think I will go wake her with a kiss this morning.  LOL.
KenC
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Oscar
Guest
« Reply #9 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to key word being "almost", posted by KenC on Nov 5, 2002

and friends there, to see how she is in HER environment.  See where she works, if she actually does etc..  Anyone can come here claiming anything, when in fact their life might be a complete lie..  I would never consider bringing a woman here without meeting her family and friends and learning about her life firsthand there..

My 2 cents.
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Stevo
Guest
« Reply #10 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to But Ken, it's a real disadvantage not me..., posted by Oscar on Nov 5, 2002

w/o going through the K-1 process, why wouldn't you?  If BruceJet can bring a lady over here, it doesn't preclude him from later on going there to visit her.

If I had a choice, I would first bring the woman here, and then go there, rather than the other way around.  I have a friend who had 2 different ladies visit him here, since he felt more comfortable with meeting them on his home turf rather than on their home ground.  The problem is that it is very difficult to do, so for almost everyone pursuing FSU ladies, they have no choice but to go there.

If it were possible, I would have had a succession of ladies come here, then go there to visit those that passed the USA test (which as Ken points out, is VERY critical to making it work later on).
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Oscar
Guest
« Reply #11 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to If you could bring an FSU lady here..., posted by Stevo on Nov 5, 2002

No way would I have a woman come here first, never having met her..  Like I said, to see her with her family and friends, to see HER life THERE and check it out is absolutely invaluable IMO!  Having girl after girl come here, at great expense, never having met her, where you have no clue if she is a scammer or not is just plain stupidity to me!  I can see absolutely zero advantages to having her come here before meeting her there and checking out her life.
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KenC
Guest
« Reply #12 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to But Ken, it's a real disadvantage not me..., posted by Oscar on Nov 5, 2002

Oscar,
(I think you should have posted this to my post above.)  I never said the guy should marry her without getting to know her.  I would think that he will eventually have to visit her in her country before taking that step.  I also feel that most guys would not be able to resist the opportunity to have their Russian girlfriends visit here, if given the chance.  Right or wrong, it would be just too easy to pass up.
KenC
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Oscar
Guest
« Reply #13 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to My Ukraine Lady has US Visa but needs ti..., posted by BruceJet on Nov 4, 2002

to have her come HERE as opposed to you going there!  First, travel visa's to come to the US are not easy to get (makes me a tad suspicious).  
And you really need to see her in HER environment, with her family, her friends, you need to be able to talk with these people, get a real feel for her as opposed to only what SHE has written to you..  If she gives you reasons for why you can't or shouldn't meet these people, it's a definite red flag..

I don't mean to be rude but you say in your post- "We have been very close to each other and I have no reason not to trust her".
YES YOU DO HAVE A REASON!  You have never even met her AND you have written to her for only 3 months!

How do you know she has even really gotten a visa?  Have you taken the time to check out the various scam sites to make sure she isn't there??  Even if she isn't there, it's no guarantee she is not a scammer!

If she is totally legit, that would be great and you can toss my post.  In that case, regarding her not paying for the airfare-  MOST of these women do not really have any savings..  They often live week to week (some, day to day).
I think most women there would not be able to afford $400 for even half a plane fare..  So yes, I think it would be very reasonable for you to pay for her airfare.  After all, it was you who invited her here..

I can only say that if you insist on doing this, I would make SURE to SEND her an absolutely non-refundable plane ticket.  I would NOT send her the money to buy her own ticket!  If she has a problem with this in ANY way, you will know she is a scammer..
I will reiterate the golden rule once again that has been posted here more times than I can count that has served many men well-

NEVER GIVE MONEY TO A WOMAN YOU HAVE NEVER MET IN PERSON!

Best of luck..  Sorry if my post is mostly a downer.  I have just been there too many times, perhaps I'm a bit jaded when it comes to stuff like this..  ;-)
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vagn
Guest
« Reply #14 on: November 05, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to My Ukraine Lady has US Visa but needs ti..., posted by BruceJet on Nov 4, 2002

And don't be stingy, pay the full round trip
if you can afford it.

Well, that's how I would handle it.
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