Get ready guys!!

[Rickster]

... in response to Get ready guys!!, posted by KenC on Jun 12, 2002

Nice job Ken,

I done things very similar to what you outlined with my Russian wife.  The ESL classes (English as a Second Language) I think I got the most return on.  This was not only beneficial for her to learn English better, but also it was a social event and something for her to look forward to.  Luckily after we got married the college she attended allowed us to get the in-state tuition rate which saved me quite a bit.  

I would also suggest supporting any hobbies your wife (or soon to be wife) might have.  My wife had a huge interest in Hobby Lobby (arts and crafts store).

Well done...Rick

[Apk1]

... in response to Nice, posted by Rickster on Jun 12, 2002

My wife also enjoyed her ESL class, but became bored with it after 2 months since her English skill was already pretty good, she needs to learn the many English axioms but speaking to more people every day improves that.
What we found to help her was a English language "Berlitz" computer program complete with headphone and speaker for pronunciation feedback...quite cheap actually, and she works with it every day.

Hobbies are very good for her to find something to do while you are away to work...I work from home, so my wife never is without someone to talk to...but her garden is giving us a lot of fresh tomatoes right now, soon we will have cucumbers. It is impossible to go to the supermarket or any store with a garden dept. without her eyeing the flowers, I tease her that I could drop her off at the nursery and come back in 3 hours and she still would not be finished looking!
She takes a painting class at a community center, and the she enjoys the little old ladies there who are facinated she is from Russia....not to mention she enjoys the sweets they bring for her to sample..for some reason there is never any left over for me (smile).

I found that giving my wife a cell phone with a generous calling plan gives her the freedom to stay networked with her FSU girlfriends that live here in California. Calling home to Moscow is a Sunday morning ritual for her, and with a 8 cent/min. phone rate it is not expensive.

My wife was never homesick...too much to do here, and her son keeps her very busy after school...beating his homework into him.

[keithandkatya]

... in response to ESL CLASSES, posted by Apk1 on Jun 12, 2002

The garden is a great idea... my wife likes to do everything organically... unfortunately she has come to realize that Florida unlike Ukraine has about a million different kind of bugs that love cucumbers and pumpkins, and zuccini (spelling?) and other things she grows... besides just picking off the critters (which we have been doing) any ideas beside spraying...
Keith

[Apk1]

... in response to Re: ESL CLASSES and garden...., posted by keithandkatya on Jun 12, 2002

My wife told me a funny one...the many people that live on the outskirts of Moscow that sell their fruit and vegetables near the metro stations all grow organically....because they are too poor to buy fertilizer and pesticides, but the goats are well fed...eating the trash the city people leave behind.

[Del]

... in response to Re: ESL CLASSES and garden...., posted by keithandkatya on Jun 12, 2002

it does seem to work with most of the bugs here. And, she will feel 'comfortable' using it!  :-))))

[Jeff S]

... in response to Get ready guys!!, posted by KenC on Jun 12, 2002

There's also been a lot of diccussion on the Asian board about getting rid of evidence of past relationships. Maybe a photo album with pictures is OK, but odds and ends laying around that you're used to, that may be indicative of other women is a no no and will cause more grief than it is worth.

I agree that any major redecorating is probably better done after she arrives, but a thorough cleaning and Ken's idea of some handy feminine products, new sheets and towels for her, dry cleaned draperies, popourri in the bathrooms, maybe some scented candles to get rid of the stale beer and pizza odors, and other ideas are really good. Nothing will say welcome more than fresh bouquets of flowers around your home on the day she arrives, too.

-- Jeff S.

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Get ready guys!!, posted by KenC on Jun 12, 2002


Ken, good advice, and I enjoy this stuff, since it is pertinent to me right now.

(All the newbies are probably saying: "Sheesh, who cares about this stuff?" That's how I used to be when guys would talk about K1 issues, and now I read every word...)

Here's my thinking about it...

"Prepare your bachelor dump er, pad:"

Ha! I've got this one taken care of: I'm moving! Lease is up here in July. I should just have boxes unpacked by the time she gets here. No time to start building my patented mold projects in the fridge...

About pictures: I hope this doesn't include pictures of my ex-wife. I don't have them prominently displayed, but they are in the picture albums, and I don't want to ditch pictures of my daughter's mom...

"Scouting the territory-"

This is good advice. I will start doing this. I was thinking about getting Dish TV anyway.. maybe I will get it, but not add the Russian channels right away?

"Things to research-"

Real good advice on the driving laws. I am adding that to my things to do list...

"Prepare yourself mentally-"

Good advice... but how can you prepare for it? Isn't it like a woman preparing for the pain of childbirth? Nothing can prepare her for it, it is more excruciating than she can imagine, but later she always feels that it was worth it...

[Richard]

... in response to Get ready guys!!, posted by KenC on Jun 12, 2002

Ken C:

Prepare your bachelor dump er, pad:
Do the necessary things you have been putting off. Like painting, cleaning and organizing.

Richard:
What about leaving the redecorating for a project she could be in charge of after she arrives. I think that being able to redecorate the house according to her tastes - picking a color scheme and all - would go a long way towards making feel that it is her place too.  (I can be a real cheap azzed SOB at times, but I don't want to redecorate twice.)
I have been working on the outside of my place plan on making the inside her project if/when she gets her.

[keithandkatya]

... in response to Re: Get ready guys!!, posted by Richard on Jun 12, 2002

smart man...

[tfcrew]

... in response to Re: Get ready guys!!, posted by Richard on Jun 12, 2002

Gotta show YOUR stuff..However some research may be in order..favorite colors... paint or wallpaper... that kind of thing

[Stevo]

... in response to Re: Get ready guys!!, posted by Richard on Jun 12, 2002

Richard:
What about leaving the redecorating for a project she could be in charge of after she arrives. I think that being able to redecorate the house according to her tastes - picking a color scheme and all - would go a long way towards making feel that it is her place too. (I can be a real cheap azzed SOB at times, but I don't want to redecorate twice.)
I have been working on the outside of my place plan on making the inside her project if/when she gets her.

Stevo:
God forbid that I let my wife redecorate when she first got here.  If I had let her go to town, my place would've looked like modern Russian (i.e., 60s American).  We had LOTS of fights about this and I had to stop her from making my place into a recreation of a typical Russian flat.  Now, after 2 years, her tastes are much, much better and I pretty much can let her do anything she wants with regard to redecorating and I find it very acceptable.

An example: I have some very classic/expensive mahogany bedroom furniture that is done up in 1800s style with a distressed finish.  She thought it was all old stuff and wanted to replace it with one of those cheap lacquered sets.  She just couldn't understand what she was looking at.  She just kept telling me that if she wanted old furniture she'd have stayed in Russia (everything has to look new!).

Now, she has learned to really appreciate the good quality stuff and really likes the style (after having visited other homes here and seeing what is typical American style).

So, make your place clean and let her decorate a LITTLE, but she'll need quite a bit of time to learn American style and apply it to your apartment or home (unless you happen to like that 60s American look of Russian flats!)

Stevo

[KenC]

... in response to Bad idea!, posted by Stevo on Jun 12, 2002

Stevo,
I gotta agree with ya.  It takes a while to aquire the tastes that we have here in this country.  The RW new to this country don't have a clue as to what is available here and won't for a while.
KenC

[Stevo]

... in response to Get ready guys!!, posted by KenC on Jun 12, 2002

ggg