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Author Topic: FINISHING SCOOL  (Read 6042 times)
Quick Fix
Guest
« on: February 09, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
I am corresponding with a few girls in anticipation of my springtime trip. I am having excellent correspondence as I get to know these girls better and vice versa. HOWEVER, I have begun to notice a pattern among several of these girls (they are all with the same agency). I am asking several serious questions and all the answers are good save for the response that they will be happy to come to America (if we really like each other etc)as soon as they finish their university studies.
Is this an excuse or a legitimate comment? Seems to me if a girl loves you, she should be willing to leave her country and be with her man. That degree from what I heard isn't worth much in the USA (Perhaps I have watched too many John Wayne movies)
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Stan B
Guest
« Reply #1 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to FINISHING SCOOL, posted by Quick Fix on Feb 9, 2002

Are you only 25 or so? If not, why are you trying to date college girls? If your over 30 I'd suggest finding a woman w/ a little experiance in life (25 or over) instead of dating young girls.
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Quick Fix
Guest
« Reply #2 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to FINISHING SCOOL, posted by Quick Fix on Feb 9, 2002

I am surprised that not one of the many comments (and I am grateful for them all), picked up on my biggest concern.
Can't this just be a "cure-all" convenient excuse for the agency to provide for girls who are in fact not really available.
As someone who has been over to the FSU many times I have never had a woman that was in the "marriage game" say that she had to finish school first before she was willing to come to the USA. But with this agency 90% of the girls tell you, when asked deliberate questions, that they have to finish school first.
If that be the case then the agency should take these girls off their site and not portray them as girls ready to get married when if fact they are not.
Late
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RW
Guest
« Reply #3 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: FINISHING SCHOOL, posted by Quick Fix on Feb 10, 2002

Possible, but most likely you are targeting very specific age group and in this case you are more likely to get the same answer (especially if the translations are done by the same intepretr at the agency).

Other question - when they say thay have to finish school first - how many years we are talking about? Are you communicating with 18-year old who has another 4 years ahead or is it 20-21 year old girl who is about to graduate and would feel bad about wasting 4 years of studying and all the money before she leaves.

Also, I am sure agencies are portraiting women who are LOOKING for a husband, not the ones which are ready to move to US in 24-hours. You never know how long this search will take. It is not like you are engaged, getting papers ready and than she tells you she has another two years in school and not ready to move.


Russian Wife
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MarkInTx
Guest
« Reply #4 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: Re: FINISHING SCHOOL, posted by RW on Feb 10, 2002


Not high school, I hope!

(Sorry... couldn't resist!)
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MarkInTx
Guest
« Reply #5 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: FINISHING SCHOOL, posted by Quick Fix on Feb 10, 2002

First off... you might think of changing your handle.

When "QuickFIx" is your name, it's hard to think of you as a serious, reflective man... (For instance, when I think of the unfortunate handle: LP, I will always think of a slow playing record ;-)

But I would say that you are right. If a majority of the women on a site are using this as an excuse, you have a cause for a concern.

Especially if she wants you to support her (from America) while she is in school (in Russia).

Best way to flush that out is to say this:

"I agree. Your degree is very important to me. Unfortunately, I have heard tales about how degrees in Russia aren't honored in America, because some important credits were skipped.

Tell you what... can you get me a copy of your grade transcripts, so I can take them to a college here? That way we can make sure that the degree you get in Russia will help you when you get here."

If she's a scammer, she'll never get you the grades/transcripts.

If she is sincere about getting her degree, she'll jump at this, because she'll want it to be valid in America.
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tim360z
Guest
« Reply #6 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to FINISHING SCOOL, posted by Quick Fix on Feb 9, 2002

and expect the girl to like drop her life for you.  Diddija ever think they may have put alotta time and effort into getting their degree...maybe even a "red diploma."  So here you are comin' along...like so many before you and shes gonna stop her education to write creamcheese letters to you.  Are you for real???  Like "maybe" you even meet?  And she is gonna drop everything in her life for you...you must be nuts.
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Richard
Guest
« Reply #7 on: February 09, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to FINISHING SCOOL, posted by Quick Fix on Feb 9, 2002

You must consider that these women have set a goal (a university degree) and have invested much time, energy and expense in pursuing this goal.  The closer to completing the degree the person is, the more that they have invested.  For them to move to another country before completing their degree may require them to start over again,rendering their previous investment worthless.  While much has been written here about how a foreign degree is worth little, if anything here, I am sure that there are situations where the degrees will be worth something.  If not right away, then down the road they may have value.

In addition, as was noted elsewhere in this thread, completing the degree may have a positive impact on their self esteem.  I also believe accomodating her education into your (plural you) plans can help build your relationship.  
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PrincetonLion
Guest
« Reply #8 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: FINISHING SCOOL, posted by Richard on Feb 9, 2002

Hmmm... For example, my own university diploma was evaluated as Master's degree in U.S. ... And this is the main reason why I am here...
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BubbaGump
Guest
« Reply #9 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Hmmmmm..., posted by PrincetonLion on Feb 10, 2002

Technical degrees are worth something, but I can't think of any other degrees worth much from a foreign country.  I know a degree takes about 5 1/2 years in Europe but they still don't develop into good technical people by going to school alone.  
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Mike
Guest
« Reply #10 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to There are exceptions, posted by BubbaGump on Feb 10, 2002

Yea but they can become officers in our military once they become citizens ( if they meet the age requirement ) and thus go into many fields. That is one example of what can be done by finishing their school work.
Mike
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Richard
Guest
« Reply #11 on: February 10, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to Re: There are exceptions, posted by Mike on Feb 10, 2002

Other examples, that maybe I should have included are:

The sense of accomplishement from completing their university degree program.

Having a college degree.  Sometimes employers require that (potential) employees have a batchelors degree or equivalent. I have also heard stories of peoples careers platueauing because they do not have a univeristy degree.

A college degree can also be used to qualify for admission to graduate school.  Some professional degree programs (business, law and librarianship, for example) require a bachelors degree and can be used to gain entrance to or enhance a career.

I suspect that there are other examples, but they don't come to mind at the moment.
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Bobby Orr
Guest
« Reply #12 on: February 09, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to FINISHING SCOOL, posted by Quick Fix on Feb 9, 2002

A girl has been going to school with the goal of achieving a degree in whatever.  It is very important for some of them to complete something this prestigious - for many it is an affirmation of their own self-worth.  To tell a girl that you want her etc. but that she must go with you now and can not finish school probably will be taken poorly by most girls.  I suggest you tell the girl that it is important for her to finish her schooling prior to coming to the US.  I think she will feel you show character and like you more for supporting her in the achievement of her goal to have a College or University degree.
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LP
Guest
« Reply #13 on: February 09, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to FINISHING SCOOL, posted by Quick Fix on Feb 9, 2002

...finishing schools, there is an FSU agency that takes country girls and puts them through months of this for male clients.

They teach them everything from cooking to the the arts and lanquages.
They even will mold her to your value and belief systems. lol, its MOB to the extreme. A supposedly really high class operation, it'll cost you $35K last I looked. It's been many months so I bet its more these days.

Too late for me, but one supposedly ends up with quite a Princess at the end.

Hey Jack, you know about this outfit? (I don't want to post the URL.)
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micha1
Guest
« Reply #14 on: February 09, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »
... in response to FINISHING SCOOL, posted by Quick Fix on Feb 9, 2002

It is a very legitimate comment.  It does not mean that if a girl love, she lost her identity.
Would you not care for a well educated girl.
Girls also are an entity, permit them to think.
A lot of degrees are not worth much in North America, also.
Sure the John Wayne and Clint the Mayor's movies, one should not have watch too much of.
Should you care for cowboy movies or heroes' movies,  rent movies made by Leone.
Here is a title for you,  - Mimi metallo worker - directed by an italian girl, Lena Wessmuelle (??).
Should you care to know about love and life.    Cinema Paradiso  or The Postillo.

I have said all of this, head over tail, to state the facts that you should be more humble vis-a-vis these girls,
you are going after happiness, love,  a partner in life.

When you speak of the russian, remember that your national sport is basebal, theirs is chess.  Some food for
thought.
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