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Author Topic: anybody ever read any books on the subject?  (Read 3611 times)
deatchef
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« on: January 17, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »

I ordered these:
To Russia for Love: The American Man's Best Option    by Frank R. Coleman
Wedded Strangers : The Challenges of  Russian-American Marriages    by Lynn Visson

Any body else?

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John K
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« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to anybody ever read any books on the subje..., posted by deatchef on Jan 17, 2002

Read part of Wedded Strangers.  It's ok, but it misses a lot of the details that you will read here.  It does cover some of the cultural differences that can put a strain on your Russian/American relationship.  It makes a nice primer before you start digging too deep into the archives.

To Russia for Love:  A lot of information.  Not all of it true.  Frank Coleman notices a lot but he doesn't see everything as it really is.  I suspect that this book might get you in trouble someday.  In fact, in Wedded Strangers, they talk about him and how his wife admitted on a nationwide talk show how she didn't really love him.  They later divorced.  It's interesting reading, but don't accept it as gospel...

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Charles
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« Reply #2 on: January 18, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to anybody ever read any books on the subje..., posted by deatchef on Jan 17, 2002

I read "Wedded Strangers" and it was interesting.  But I agree with the comments below that there are other sources of information on this board and elsewhere.  But if you like books there is helpful information.  If I were recommending a book about finding and keeping a wife, I recommend Harville Haddix "Keeping the Love You Find".  It has nothing to do with finding a Russian wife, but it will help you deal with all the issues you will hear about especially age differences, cultural differences, etc. and anything else that can happen.
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BrianN
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« Reply #3 on: January 18, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to anybody ever read any books on the subje..., posted by deatchef on Jan 17, 2002

I wouldn't order these books if someone paid me too.  But that's just me.  Everyone is different.

Go to the local appliance store, one guy's ready to walk out with the first dishwasher that he sees, and is perfectly happy with it.  Then there's the pinhead on the stool evaluating warranties between different manufacturers and considering price, options, delivery, etc.  All the while, he's worrying about whether to spend 50.00 on a warranty, while his 10 hours of nightmarish thoughts are worth about 400.00 in business time.  In the end, he lost money because he was too picky.

Read these threads, maybe exchange some emails with ladies, get on a plane and go.   Researching FSU ladies and the process may need some prior education, but it ain't rocket science.  After all, you could find yourself well educated on it all, go over there and find what you think is the perfect match, then discover later, that you're living the dog house.

duhhh what did I do wrong?  This wasn't in the book was it?

American women are no different, you just don't have to go so far.

If you want to pay for something, ie, advice, then send patrick 20 bucks for the website and read it.  I'll guarantee you that you'll learn more here from REAL time experience, than someone elses time late thoughts from a book.  But what the heck, go both routes, book and pl thread. Just pay attention and use your best judgement for what suits you.

(This was not intended to be a hostile post, but rather a realistic one... sorry if I offended anyone -there ain't no book in print that could equal what's here).

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deatchef
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« Reply #4 on: January 18, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Sorry...., posted by BrianN on Jan 18, 2002

"If you want to pay for something, ie, advice, then send patrick 20 bucks for the website and read it"
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MarkInTx
Guest
« Reply #5 on: January 18, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Re: Sorry.... who's patrick, wut $20, posted by deatchef on Jan 18, 2002

He was trying to say that no book you could buy is worth more than the archives on this site.

And if you are anxious to "waste" $20, just send it to this web site moderator.

It was a slight joke to make his point. But his point is good. When you buy a book, you are reading one man's opinion.

When you read the archives here, you are reading a hundred men's opinions...

Which do you think is more instructive?

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KenC
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« Reply #6 on: January 18, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Re: Sorry.... who's patrick, wut $20, posted by deatchef on Jan 18, 2002

n/t
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Patrick
Guest
« Reply #7 on: January 18, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Re: Sorry.... who's patrick, wut $20, posted by deatchef on Jan 18, 2002

Welcome to Planet-Love, thicken your skin and get ready for flak.  That's just the guys way of showing they care about you.  Don't let it get you down. I myself bought Gary Clark's book "Your Bride Is In The Mail" many years ago.  Of course, there wasn't much to be learned in the internet about all this at that time.  It at least made me aware that I would have to write to a lot of ladies to succeed.

Probably the best thing you could do to prepare is to start learning the language and something about the culture of the ladies.  If you can get into a night class in a local college, that would be the best place to study Russian.  You'll learn a lot more that way than you would on your own using the typical material catering to tourists.

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deatchef
Guest
« Reply #8 on: January 18, 2002, 05:00:00 AM »

... in response to Keep the $20, posted by Patrick on Jan 18, 2002

... got it.. I guess after reading 2 1/2  pages of archives, my mind blanked out. This forum is great and the more I read the more confused I get about to be or not to be (A R/W U/W's Husband). There are so many good points from both sides. Follow your gut i guess... Thanks for thickening my skin guys, I can take it so keep it comin'
John
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