|
Title: Best age for me? Post by: Jason on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM Yea, I've used the search and read the archives, but I want some fresh opinions. If I'm 39 and do okay with the ladies here, what age women should I be pursuing in Columbia? I gotta admit, I'm leaning towards some of the young ones, but I don't know if I'll stand a chance (or if I should?)
I think I'm going to sign up for a tour for my first trip. My Spanish sucks! Title: Re: Best age for me? Post by: Pete E on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Best age for me?, posted by Jason on Dec 16, 2004
If you are a reasonably good looking 39 you can have about as young a girl as you want.And it takes a little time to drop your American notions about age,its much different down here.Many 40 or so guys have shown up thinking 30 and are soon dating the 21 year olds. Part of the question is what are you looking for?Do you want to have kids?Do you want a wife that is more educated and could be working sooner or do you not want her to work? I think girls a little older,like 25 plus might be a better bet because they are more settled.But some of the younger girls can be too.One of my friends,43, met a girl about 23 who is mature and for real.But he had other girls that age and older who were really flaky and undependable. Its probably best not to try and decide before you experience the girls.Just come,meet alot of them and go from there.Individual differences will be more important than calender age. But I would look 21 up if I were you. Pete Title: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: dann on December 17, 2004, 05:00:00 AM Title: Re: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: Pete E on December 18, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Best age for me?, posted by dann on Dec 17, 2004
Dann, Thats a very reasonable age difference.Especially if you have a mature 22 year old. Pete Title: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: larrydarrell on December 17, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Best age for me?, posted by Pete E on Dec 16, 2004
Pete, I know this point has been done to death, but why do so many of the youngsters on the agency websites put 35 as the maximum age? Are they embarrassed in front of their friends/family to express a willingness to go out with older men? Title: Re: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: Pete E on December 17, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Best age for me?, posted by larrydarrell on Dec 17, 2004
It seems to me it their wish lish list.Some may be serious about that.I see some say ONLY after the age prefference.But most will stretch it I think.Some alot.Depends onn the girls age and what else she has going for and against her.A girl with kids is probably getting few takers and and will be more open.Also maybe they need to be around while to learn they are not getting their first prefference.I see girls 35 who says 30-40.She needs to get real. But your appearance and apparent age are also important.I may be a little vain here but I see guys in their 30's I think I look better than. Bottom line go for it,you never know.First trip down I was talking to Diego Reyes who owns the Il Cortile Italian restaurant in Cuidad Jardine.He used to have a small agency on the side,I was looking at his books.I was was 56 at the time.I said how young is too young for me.He says 12.We laugh. But it was closer to the truth than a guy who thinks he is 56 so he is a candidate for 40 up only.I see a girl 28.I say would she be interested in me?He says you never know.Actually he called her to come over.She never showed.I always wondered if she looked in the window and split.Probably not. Pete Title: Re: Best age for me? Post by: cabocancun on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Best age for me?, posted by Jason on Dec 16, 2004
You may meet some immature ladies of all ages. Potential, signs of immaturity may include: 1. Never has held a job. 2. Talks in a tone of voice that is very "babyish",almost like baby talk. 3. Excessive giggling and nervous laughter. 4. Has never had a boyfriend. 5. Constantly,refers to her parents when answering any question. I am also 39, I would not go below 24. Buena Suerte... Title: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: JimmySTLOUIS on December 17, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Best age for me?, posted by cabocancun on Dec 16, 2004
I agree with the above am 37 and my girl is 19 now. I love her but it will be a HUGE amount of work when she gets here, but I am looking forward to it. TE AMO PERU!!!! jim Title: Re: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: cabocancun on December 17, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Best age for me?, posted by JimmySTLOUIS on Dec 17, 2004
Jim, Your devotion to her will give her the support she needs while making the transition. It maybe a good idea to set a date, when you guys will return to Peru,so that she can look forward to seeing her family again. South American woman rarely spend time alone,so I think it is difficult for them to sit in an empty house eight hours per day. Can she visit with you at work or have lunch with you? I have met many responsible,independant 19 year olds over the years. It sounds like you have taken your time and made a wise choice. TE AMO COLOMBIA!!! BUENA SUERTE.... Title: 15 - 45 Post by: cancunhound on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Best age for me?, posted by Jason on Dec 16, 2004
Depends what you're looking for - and just because that 15 is legal in Colombia keep in mind you are bound by your laws where you reside. The maturity that other posters speak of about the younger gals really depends on their social/economic status - there is no lack of very mature 18 year old gals that are from typcially lower economic status. Just my 2 cents. Title: Re: Best age for me? Post by: papi on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Best age for me?, posted by Jason on Dec 16, 2004
Jason, i have dated several women very young but would agree that most are trouble. there are exceptions but for the most part again are trouble. it has been suggested in the posts below you start at 27. I feel you can go lower than that but the 17-20 beauties are immature. And yes some 17 y/o sneak into the agencies. My current novia just turned 26 - i am 45. i'd say start at 21 and up Title: Re: Best age for me? Post by: zack on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Best age for me?, posted by Jason on Dec 16, 2004
I am the same age as you are so I can relate to your concerns. You will probably have women of all ages interested in you but I agree with everyone's comments that Ladies in their early 20's are probably best avoided. A lot of guys say "My novia is only 20 years old but she is very mature for her age" I don't care how mature she seems, she is still only 20! If your Spanish sucks I highly recommend you start learning Spanish now. I know it's a long haul to learn another language but even a small head-start will go a long way in Colombia. Good luck. Zack Title: Re: Best age for me? Post by: roadken on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Best age for me?, posted by Jason on Dec 16, 2004
The young ones (18-24) are alot of fun.But if you want a great marriage,look for maturity and quality.I am 49 and married my wife who is 35.I considered younger ladies but I noticed a big difference in personalities below 28 years. Everyone is different.Mostly I would say look for a sweet girl who loves you and wants to make "you" happy.Good luck. Title: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: kented on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Best age for me?, posted by roadken on Dec 16, 2004
Mostly I would say look for a sweet girl who loves you and wants to make "you" happy.Good luck This is absolutely the one and only criteria you should use. Title: Re: Best age for me? Post by: jediknight on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Best age for me?, posted by Jason on Dec 16, 2004
[This message has been edited by jediknight] rays formula is interesting, i'm 37 and my friend is 27 applying the formula to her should put her at 26, very close to the mark. before going any further, keep in mind that nothing is set in stone, what works for one peron/couple may not work for another. there are general opinions and observations that you may want to consider from people that have been at this longer. there are many factors to consider, whether a woman is sincere and honest, whether she has or wants kids or if she is a player, green card shark, looking for a sugar daddy etc, these all come in different ages. also, it depends what part of colombia she is from. there is a general concensus that the cali girls are more party girls and looking for a good time while the ones from bogota are more professional and serious. the costenas are hard working and very family oriented, but as always there are exceptions also what is it that you want and want in a woman? do you want kids or someone that already has them? do you want someone to have a good time with or someone to have a family and long lasting realtionship with. assuming that you and the women you'll be meeting want the loving, long lasting relationship that most of us want, i feel that the older a woman is, the less of an issue your age difference becomes. a 10, 15, 20 year difference, i believe is less of an issue when the woman is 25 and older. i think that the closer she is to 20, the bigger the chances for problems, stemming from lack of maturity or inexperience. i'm not saying that there aren't any mature 20 year olds and there are exceptions but i think the older she is the better your chances are of finding someone who will be able to handle the separation from her family and country. so for a man 39, i think as a starting point you should look at 27 and higher. as far as standing a chance, you'll have an excellent chance of meeting the younger women, just keep your eyes open because not all are what they say they are. there is just as good of a chance that you'll meet someone who is only after your wallet as there is in meeting someone who is honest and wants to be a great wife. Title: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: el Cantante on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Best age for me?, posted by jediknight on Dec 16, 2004
Great assumption, and totally agreed with you. The young ones are fun to party with, but rarely sincere and honest enough to be a good wife. Pay special attention to those with kids. Are they looking for providers for their kids or do they really care for you. Title: Re: Best age for me? Post by: Troy on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM Title: Re: Best age for me? Post by: kented on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Best age for me?, posted by Jason on Dec 16, 2004
I am 57 and my wife is 31. Age is a non issue for the women. The only problem with girls in their early twenties is that they are not always very mature and then don't always understand completely what they want in life. So it could change and you are with a different lady than the one you dated. Very few ladies will eliminate you because of age but YOU need to consider how mature the young ladies you date are. Buena suerte. ¡Que se disfrutan! Title: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: Chris F on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Best age for me?, posted by kented on Dec 16, 2004
"The only problem with girls in their early twenties is that they are not always very mature and then don't always understand completely what they want in life. So it could change and you are with a different lady than the one you dated" THIS IS VERY TRUE!! Having dated young girls from Cali (under 23) you are entering a high risk situation bringing someone younger then that here for a wife. Title: Re: Best age for me? Post by: Ray on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Best age for me?, posted by Jason on Dec 16, 2004
Her minimum age = (your age/2) + 7 Title: Ray's formula... Post by: Jeff S on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Best age for me?, posted by Ray on Dec 16, 2004
.. is over 1000 years old. It's an old Arabic tradition for determining the ideal age for a wife. Funny enough, it usually works out pretty well. Personally, I prefer the Asian (originally Chinese) zodiac for a spouse's compatability: Ne (rat) 1900 1912 1924 1936 1948 1960 1972 1984 1996 Ne (rat) Compatable: dragon & monkey Incompatable: horse - Jeff Title: Re: Ray's formula... Post by: stefang on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Ray's formula..., posted by Jeff S on Dec 16, 2004
Jeff I don't like the Chinese compatability I'm a Rooster and my fiance a Rabbit. Title: Re: Re: Best age for me? Post by: Locii on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Best age for me?, posted by Ray on Dec 16, 2004
What in the heck is that? Is it some kind of mean average pulled from a sampling of successful marriages or did you make it up? I am not being negative in asking that just critical. I suppose functions like this could be pulled from successful marriage data. SHould I ask what her maximum age is? Ciao Title: A formula for age? Post by: zack on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Best age for me?, posted by Ray on Dec 16, 2004
That cracks me up. I have heard of a lot of equations for mathematical concepts and such but a formula for the minimum age your novia should be? I'm not attacking you, but where did you get that equation? I don't think a minimum age requirement can be based on one formula alone. A lot of factors come into play. Title: w(t+1)=a+r1*w(t)+ihw[h(t)] Post by: Ray on December 17, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to A formula for age?, posted by zack on Dec 16, 2004
Here's one for you that predicts successful marriages. I just thought it was interesting :-) I remember a guy in engineering school who tried to write a differential equation to describe the sex act, but he finally gave up because he said there were too many variables...LOL! ----- Equation predicts bliss Chris Lackner The secret to a successful marriage can be found in a mathematical formula, according to American researchers, who believe they can use equations to predict a newlywed couple's chances for marital bliss. Researchers at the University of Washington have devised two formulas that they say allows them to predict, with a 94% success rate, whether a new marriage will last. And all it takes is a 15-minute interview. The formulas used to detect newlywed joy or disaster were publicly presented for the first time this week by mathematician Dr. James Murray, who spoke at the Mathematical Biology Conference at Dundee University in Scotland. The presentation was based on a 10-year study of 700 American couples conducted by Dr. Murray and psychologist Dr. John Gottman, both from the University of Washington in Seattle. "Positive things can be taken from [the formula]. It points out why some people are having problems and can show what action has to be taken to save the marriage," Dr. Murray said. All the couples who participated in the experiment were initially observed by researchers during a 15-minute conversation shortly after they were married in the early 1990s. Participants were asked to discuss contentious marital issues, such as money, sex or children. The couple's ability to discuss the issue was evaluated according to a mathematical scale that awarded positive points for good signals and negative points for bad signals. Bad signals included rolling of the eyes, criticism or mockery of one's partner, as well as displays of coldness and negativity. Positive signs included displays of humour, positive vocal tone, smiles and affectionate gestures. "We used an accepted psychological scoring system to award them points, such as minus three for scorn and plus two for humour," Dr. Murray said. "Then we put their points on a graph and by converting them into algebraic terms were able to make our divorce predictions. "We didn't tell the volunteers, of course ... telling a couple their marriage is going to fail is not what they want to hear." The results of the observations were used to develop an equation for both husbands and wives and each couple was contacted every two years to ascertain the state of their marriage. Researchers say they were able to predict the success or failure of each couple with an accuracy of almost 94%. Other variables were taken into account during the experiment in order to determine a couple's compatibility, Dr. Murray said, including the effect an individual's contribution to the conversation had on the mood of his or her spouse. "The key thing that comes out of it is that we have been able to calculate how people interact," Dr. Murray said. "For example, the wife might be a conflict avoider and the husband might be volatile. That marriage would not survive." Our society is marriage-obsessed and naturally inclined to believe in marital perfection, said Julie Rak, an English professor and popular culture expert at the University of Alberta. Ms. Rak said people often make decisions in their lives according to a formula our culture dictates, including when to get married, when to have kids and custom-based beliefs such monogamy and the search for one ideal partner. "We learn from a very early age that there is only one person in the world for us, which is mathematically ridiculous," Ms. Rak said. "Marriage is not like that and people are always not predictable and change over time." "I think we're taught that marriage is an ideal that we aspire to," she said. "The reality is quite different. Divorce rates are much higher than they once were." THE MATHEMATICS OF MARRIAGE: Wife's equation w(t+1)=a+r1*w(t)+ihw[h(t)] w= wife, h= husband, t= time a= a constant representing the wife's state of mind when she is not with her husband. r1*w(t)= represents how easy it is to change her state of mind when she is in conversation with her husband. ihw= "influence function" -- a measure of the influence that a husband's remarks have on his wife. h(t)= the husband's "score" during their 15-minute conversation. w(t+1)=how the wife has reacted to her husband's conversation -- the higher the number then the greater the likelihood of divorce Husband's equation H(t+1)=b+r2*h(t)+iwh[w(t)] b= a constant representing the husband's state of mind when he is not with his wife. r2*w(t)= represents how easy it is for him to change his state of mind when he is in conversation with his wife. iwh= "influence function" -- a measure of the influence that a wife's remarks have on her husband. w(t)= the wife's score during their 15-minute conversation. H(t+1)= how the husband has reacted to his wife's conversation -- the higher the number then the greater the likelihood of divorce clackner@nationalpost.com http://www.amath.washington.edu/~swanson/NationalPost9aug03.htm Ray Title: Re: w(t+1)=a+r1*w(t)+ihw[h(t)] Post by: Pete E on December 18, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to w(t+1)=a+r1*w(t)+ihw[h(t)], posted by Ray on Dec 17, 2004
One of the engineers I used to work with was really into flow charts.I used to joke he probably had a diagram on the back of his bathroom door showing the required steps in taking a sh-t. Pete Title: Re: A formula for age? Post by: stefang on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to A formula for age?, posted by zack on Dec 16, 2004
I have seen that formula before and can't remember when it was started or by who but Heat didn't make it up. Title: Great post. Post by: kented on December 16, 2004, 05:00:00 AM |