Title: Novia asks for money Post by: elcolombiano on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM I am picking up my novia in Cali in early March to bring to the states (she already has a tourist VISA).
I asked her to take care of all her personal stuff to do before she leaves. She stated she needs to go to the GP doctor,gynoclogist,dentist,opthamalgist and purchase anti inflamatory drugs and anti cyst drugs. She has to go to Bogota to change licence plates on her car and needs airfare. She has to have her car painted 630000 pesos(prior to leaving for consignment for sale). She has a herniated disc in her back and the orthopedist ordered 20 sesions of physical therapy. She also wants to have masages done to narrow her waist as she claims she is getting fat. I called her and aked her how much money do you need total and she said $200-300 but $150 would be ok too. I know a lot of you guys send money to your girlfreinds in Colombia. What do you think of this? Title: Re: Novia asks for money Post by: H2Oh on February 15, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
You need another novia. You're getting taken. Dump her and move on. If you don't believe me........ post your unhappy experience with her on the board in a year. OH, you'll be many thousands of dollars lighter in the wallet if you wait. H2-Oh Title: Re: Novia asks for money Post by: jim c on February 13, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
It sounds to me like she would like some help but dosn't want you to pay for everything. You asked her how much she would need and she was not definite " $150.00 would be fine" according to your post. Try to understand Colombian men do not get a free ride either. The women expect you to take care of them, but it is rude to ask. You have to ( and are expected to) offer to buy things for them. They are not independant like AW's. They will not reject money or presents just because they can afford to take care of themselves. You have to be attentive, some americans are fameous for being Tocano (cheap) just because they don't understand. If its dutch treat you haven't got a chance, its her way of saying she is not for you JIMC Title: Re: Novia asks for money Post by: Hiker on February 13, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
El, I think if you consider her your girlfriend that you discuss this with her. Tell her that you are just being careful and you want to understand. I think you trust her or you don't. A bunch of guys on here can't possibly know if she is trying to scam you. Many times it is nothing more than looking at things in a different way. She might be serious in her intentions and then again maybe not. I paid for monthly medical care for a girls grandmother for a few months, just to find out that her grandmother had been dead for years. I was scammed. After that I was so parinoid of being scammed again that I was too ready to assume the worst. It is good to be careful but don't assume the worst either. Title: Do the math...... Post by: Aaron on February 13, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
[This message has been edited by Aaron] At the exchange rate of 2500 pesos to the dollar, the 630000 pesos for her painting her car comes to about $252.00 USD. Then add all the other expenses. I bet in total, she'll have to pay around $1000.00 USD or more for all that she needs. This is still cheap for US standards, but it sounds too fishy. I think she is just trying to get a feel for what you are willing to give her, and she asked for less money because she thought she could get it out of you. Then, she'll ask for more along the way. And you'll give it to her. And if you bring her here, she want more money. I don't see anything wrong with giving a girl that you have met in person a little money as a gift. But, when they throw hints and consistently ask for money, then that's a red flag. I gave a girl money in the past as a gift. She said thanks, and never asked for another red cent after that. We are still in touch. And I don't think she is interested in me just for the money because she doesn't ask for any. On the other hand, I had a date with a beautiful Calena during December, 2002. I met her before. We went out and had a nice time. However, at the end of the date, when I was going to give her 10,000 pesos for her cab fare back home, SHE ASKED FOR ME TO GIVE HER 20,000. I paid for her cab to show up, that was 10,000. I paid for our night out, that was 45,000. Then, at the end, instead of taking the 10,000 pesos to return home, she asked for 20,000 pesos. If fact, she skillfully pulled it out of my hand before I could even say NO. THAT WAS A RED FLAG AND A HALF !!!!!!!! It shows that she was thinking that I had ENOUGH MONEY, and that she could tap into it to get an extra 10,000. And I didn't like how she went about it. Aaron Title: Re: Do the math...... Post by: Pete E on February 13, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Do the math......, posted by Aaron on Feb 13, 2003
Aaron, Yeah it sounds like she didn't do the math and will ask for the rest of it when she figures it out. But the real question is is she serious about coming here to live with her novia?If so its small money.If she is just getting money and not intending to come than any amount is too much.Our friend here needs to assess(sp?fruedian slip?) that and decide.Of course our decision making process becomes proportionally impaired relative to the beauty of the woman. At least she has a tourist visa.He doesn't have the hassle and cost of the fiancee visa or the commitment of marriage.It could be a cheap test drive if he ever gets her out of the parking lot.I know,thats crude.Sorry.I couldn't help myself. Pete Title: Re: Re: Do the math...... Post by: elcolombiano on February 14, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Do the math......, posted by Pete E on Feb 13, 2003
Your advice is what I am thinking. I will send her some money and pick her up in March. If it does not work out I will send her back to Colombia. At least I did not have to Marry her or pay for a VISA. Title: Re: Re: Re: Do the math...... Post by: Pete E on February 14, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Do the math......, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 14, 2003
Or sign an affidavid of support.Sounds like a plan to me. Pete Title: Test drive results Post by: Pete E on February 14, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: Re: Re: Do the math......, posted by Pete E on Feb 14, 2003
If it doesn't work after the 90 day,or in your case as long as you want test drive,you can always tell her "thanks its been fun,but I am really looking for a newer model with higher performance and lower maintenance".Just watch out you don't get Bobbitized. It really is to the guys advantage to get a trial period if the girl will go for it.Not just to test the relationship but her response to where and how you live. Pete Title: Trial Period Post by: Andean Condor on February 14, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Test drive results, posted by Pete E on Feb 14, 2003
LoL... A trial period, huh? You can get this here beee-u-tiful latina chica for only 3 easy payment of $150! If you are at all unsatisfied, return the chica and we will send you a new one... free of charge! he he he Title: Possible but not that cheap Post by: Pete E on February 14, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Trial Period, posted by Andean Condor on Feb 14, 2003
If you are extremely lucky like our friend and find a woman with a tourist visa you might get off for a few thousand dollars for your test drive.You will have to pay air fare and expenses at least. But usually you will have to do a fiance visa,which would limit the unending test drive option.How many women will they let you sponsor on a fiance visa?Perhaps more than you want to.Each could just stay and not go back.You could be on the hook for support for more women than you would like. So if sexual adventure is the idea,better to just travel to a place of inexpensive availability like Colombia and pay up.It will be cheaper in the long run. Reminds me of the saying "if it flys,floats or f--ks,you are better off renting it." Your post brings a vision to mind off a guy eagerly opening a big box and out pops a hot latina.(Close but not quite) Of course this does not address love ,should you seek it and be so lucky as to find it.I like to joke here but that is really what most of us are seeking I think. Pete Title: Dude, she's running scams.................. Post by: Aaron on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
Why did she stop with the list? I think she should include brain surgery, and maybe the possibility of paying off the funeral for her great great great grandmother. LOL!!!!! Title: that's a good one (lol)...tess Post by: Stephen on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Dude, she's running scams.................., posted by Aaron on Feb 12, 2003
..... Title: Re: Novia asks for money Post by: Georgina on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
You should be grateful she is even asking you for the money. Ha! Of course I am being sarcastic. I will be careful with this one. Title: Re: Novia asks for money Post by: Pete E on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
For sure get those medical things done while she is still in Colombia,much,much cheaper there. As far as the car painting,she should pay you back when it sells. Waist messages?I think thats nonsence,doesn't work.Anybody know about this? Bottom line,it's not alot of money.If the relationship is good and she really is coming here,I would say do it.Where guys get in trouble is sending money to girls who are not serious about them. Pete Title: Re: Re: Novia asks for money Post by: Pordzhik on February 26, 2003, 05:00:00 AM Title: Re: Novia asks for money Post by: bogota vet on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
Sounds like you got off easy!!! If she is your fiancee , then it seems normal and expected. Looks like it should add up to more dollars, so she is only making you pay partial. Title: More like a partial setup............... Post by: Aaron on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM Title: Re: Novia asks for money Post by: Throw on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
How cow, she has a lot of issues going on. You here guys on this board talking about RED FLAGS, well this is one of them. Not so much sending $150(that is to be expected in any relationship) but the problems with the back and the little things she says she needs ie. massages etc. She may need and expect the same treatments and medicines here as well. And you well know it won't be $150 dollars. You know those kind of things are inexpensive in Colombia but here it is a different story. I would strongly re-evaluate the relationship. Because what is going on now will surely repeat itself in the future... Title: Re: Novia asks for money Post by: mudd on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
it doesnt sound like a lot of money, but still.... she sounds like an expensive girl to keep around. hope you make the big bucks because she sounds like she is going to be a big drain on your wallet once she gets here. Title: Is that all? Post by: DallasSteve2 on February 12, 2003, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Novia asks for money, posted by elcolombiano on Feb 12, 2003
She's going to get all that done for $200-$300? She's going to see 4 different doctors plus prescriptions and physical therapy and paint her car? I spent about $500 getting my wife through the visa process, including some dental work. It may not feel like it but you're getting off pretty cheap if that's all she's asking for. Most of these girls are expert money spenders. However, some of this sounds fishy. It almost sounds like she wants to raise some cash and just started making a list of things that you might be willing to pay for. You should know that massage won't cause her to lose weight, unless she's getting a very special kind of massage, and you don't want that. I heard one gringo tell about how he paid for English lessons for his novia in Colombia and she left him for the English instructor. A friend of mine was dating a Russian and she wanted $1,000 to get laser eye surgery. Sucker gave her the $1,000 and she never got the surgery. Former scam artist/comedian Harry Anderson says "A fool and his money were lucky to find each other in the first place." Steve |