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Title: A very common story........ Post by: don2222 on March 15, 2004, 05:00:00 AM [This message has been edited by don2222]
I was talking with 5 other ex-pats yesterday, and the subject of date-rape came up. All of us had heard from many, many non-virgin Filipinas that the virginity was lost due to a previous Filipino boyfriend that forced her to have sex. Also, all of had heard from many single mothers that they became pregnant due to a single incident of forced sex by a previous boyfriend. These are not bar girls, but women that we have met in the malls and restaurants,or penpals or neighbors, etc. Rape is a horrible thing, but I just can't believe that it is so very common here, actually all of us commented that we really do not believe the stories that we hear here. Of course, it does happen to some women, but you will hear this same, exact story from a very large percentage of the non-virgins here. You will still meet some older Filipinas that are still virgins, but it seems fewer and fewer Filipinas are waiting until their wedding day. I am guessing that since the Filipino culture still places a lot of importance on virgin brides that a lot of Filipinas have decided to lie about their past. Virginity is not a quality that I seek in a woman , and most of the ex-pats here feel the same way. But it is sad that so many women here have perhaps decided to lie about something that is really bad (rape) and should be taken seriously. It seems that some would rather play the victim than be honest about their past. Maybe it is just part of saving face.... Don Title: Re: A very common story........ Post by: Carr on March 18, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to A very common story........, posted by don2222 on Mar 15, 2004
According to Manila Times: "About three women are reportedly being raped each day last year, according to statistics released by the Philippine National Police on Friday. The record shows a 5-percent increase in rape cases in 2003, or 1,117 incidents compared to the 1,063 cases reported in 2002." Since virginity is still viewed as a virtue in the Philippines, rape victims are viewed as soiled or damaged commodity. I would tell my friends who are seeking relationships with AMs that virginity is a non-issue here and should not be brought up. Men here are more accepting of a woman's past than my Asian brothers. Title: 1117 cases in a country of 80M! Post by: HaroldC on March 18, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to Re: A very common story........, posted by Carr on Mar 18, 2004
Gotta be way under-reported. Title: I suspect 'all of the above' is the answer. Post by: HaroldC on March 15, 2004, 05:00:00 AM ... in response to A very common story........, posted by don2222 on Mar 15, 2004
What's a girl gonna do if she is forced? Call the cops? Tell her family- who might blame her? Admit her shame? Since everybody knows it happens, that makes it a convenient excuse. And, of course, saving face is a huge part of it. The subject came up over at Asawa recently and I was told by several Filipinas, in essence, Filipinos don't care about virginity any more- like Americans. Not quite- at least they haven't reached the stage of ridiculing virginity- like Americans. |