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I recommend internet-dating to everybody. As a man however, you should be careful as there are a lot of fakes and scum on the net.
There is no reason, why you should try to find a local woman however, while outside in this world you will find many better ones.

Don't care, what they are talking around you and go ahead as follows:

1- It is the man, who decides, how and where to look for his girl from Asia or from any other place in this world - and this is nobody's else business.
2- It is the man, who is searching around the internet and due to far distance, you have to collect informations and contacts by surfing through various sites first, and this is not the business of some radical feminists and racists to prevent you to collect contact informations.
3- It is the man, who has to get on the plane first - and check personally, what is going on at the other end of that internet-contact.....this is THE MOST IMPORTANT POINT to be successful to find a foreign woman for marriage! -!
4- It is the man, who has to study the language, the culture and all about the social background of the girl - Do not expect your girl to study about you!
5- It is the man, who has to introduce your girl to your local life and to support her to improve her knowledge, so that she does not feel to depend solely on your mood.
6- It is the man, who has to be prepared to exercise an extraordinary amount of TOLERANCE towards his girl from abroad in case of any quarrel.

If you do so, the chance of a successful marriage with a foreign girl is much higher than with a local overweight arrogant demanding white feminist next door.

I am married since 27 years....

Johann

... in response to Internet dating is OK!, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

Hi Johann,

I really enjoyed your website!

Dave H.

... in response to Internet dating is OK!, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

Johann,

   With decades of living experience as an expat in Asia,you obviously have a trove of information to draw on.As you state, you speak english as a second language and most people are not familiar with the way you
organize or present information( In an Austrian/Germanic style ) so of course some people who are not familiar with it think you are being pushy or arrogant, when in fact it is just your style. There is talking the talk and then there is walking the walk, and a person who has been an expat for decades, raised a family overseas, and has generally lived between two worlds for much of his life, has a far different perspective than someone who spends a few weeks or a few months total vacation time overseas.
I have stood in some of the very spots your photos show on your homepage, including the town of Mae Sai in Thailand where my brother has lived for years. I am married to a filipina and we have a 3 year old daughter. We will be moving back to the Philippines in the not too distant future, and I would love to buy you a beer if our path should ever cross. You can mail me at the email listed with my profile. The wedding photos were great...you should be very proud.

  Nathan

... in response to Will the real expat please stand up..., posted by Nathan on Jan 18, 2004

Thanks a lot for your nice message to me. Moving back into Philippines with a Filipina as wife is a really fine thing to do. Resident status is easy to get for the foreigner, cheap living costs, always summer weather, friendly people. I also have been in Philippines several times and travelled around for alltogether about 3 months, quite everywhere except Palawan and Mindanao.

As you know Philippines, there is little to say about from me to you. Like all countries with poor economic situation, it is important to save up a bit of money, and  you must BUY your own house or apartment (if you do not have one yet in the Philippines) and pay in cash. - Everything based on rent or pay little by little is nonsense in a country where loans can cost up to 18 percent interests. To own your house pays off already if you intend to stay there longer than 5 - 6 years.

To marry a Filipina and later on, when all is working fine and your financial situation is secure, I do not see any reason, why not to move out from the US and settle down in the Philippines. - What you need there in one year, you spend easily in a single month in the USA.

You enjoy (like me too) a very secure life in a family. Your filipina wife would be crazy, if she runs over to any other man or provoking anything, which is causing trouble to you or the family as a whole. -
Yes, I know, some people like the typical overweight US-feminist or a racist American Asian man will tell you, you BUY the wife, your wife is an obedient slave, otherwise you will punch her in the face and such nonsense. Such people have just problems with themselves and envy other people.

By the way, English is not my second language, maybe language no.4 - So I need a dictionary sometimes...

USA with almost 280 million people, English as native language and the leading nation in internet-connection, so you have to accept the fact, that there are always some outsiders coming inside. I work here for network-administration.
Do not ask me, what all I have seen, do not ask me, what people told me in their messages to me..... Sometimes I have to close my eyes....

I have to update my homepage...I hope in 1-2 weeks you will see more pictures of Thailand...

Best regards,
Johann

... in response to Philippines/Moving into Asia - Great!, posted by Johann on Jan 18, 2004

In the PHILIPPINES??? Certainly you are talking about a different PHILIPPINES than the one I live in!!

Secondly, a foriegner cannot OWN property here, except under very rare circumstances.

A foriegner here with a long term LEASE on land has many more rights than one who thinks he OWNS anything here.

Larry In Dumaguete.

... in response to Resident status easy to get?, posted by shadow on Jan 18, 2004

How's things in Dumaguete?  Hope things are working out with your business. Sallie and I are sure missing the Philippines these days. We've had snow and ice for about three weeks but now just cold rain.
Your right about the lease thing in the PI it's the way to go. Most of the people I know just fly to HK and back once a year to keep the US passport. They should stamp your passport with a one year visa if you are married to a Filipina. (she may need to be with you)

Have you ran into Bert B.the Swiss guy? He drives around in his own tricycle lol

Hum & Sallie

... in response to Resident status easy to get?, posted by shadow on Jan 18, 2004

Good evening,
Hallo, Larry,
I am an unlimited Japanese permanent resident holding Austrian (European community) nationality. Do not ask me how long it takes and what are the formalities to get this permission.

Compared to any ASIAN country I know, Philippines indeed has simple regulations to let a foreigner stay there for life-time including the wife and child
Take the retirement visa:

Minimum age: 35
Deposit: usd 75000,-
Fees: not over usd 2500,-
This makes you a permanent visa including multiple re-entry permit. Unlike other countries in Asia this deposit might be used for buying a condominium unit. It can be also used to buy a house on property shared land. A place like Dumaguete however, where you are living, will not have such a kind of construction of housing, which might fit the law to be sold to the foreigner (however such housings are existing in nearby Cebu)

I do not know any other country in Asia, which makes it so easy.

To get the same conditions for Australia, you need to invest up to usd 500.000,- and your minimum age is 55 years for a 4-years limited residence permit.

Housing is cheap in Philippines, and a condominium in Cebu fitting the law to be sold to foreigners is about usd 40.000,- (around 2 million pesos) for 80 sqm.

It will cost you here in Japan easily 10 times more, and if you do not hold the unlimited permanent resident permit (as I do) then you cannot buy anything here in Japan (you will depend on extreme expensive rent)

My 1-year residence retirement permit (every 3 month re-registration of the address) for Thailand will require 50 years as minimum age, and a deposit of usd 150000,- total for me and my Japanese wife (2 separate visa-permits as we have different nationality), despite I am owning a new built 75 sqm condo-unit in Jomtien Beach as 100 percent foreign ownership in my name, and despite I have regular savings in a bank in Thailand.

In Malaysia you cannot so easily buy even a condominium, if it is too cheap (should be over usd 80.000,-) - even if you hold a 5-year permit and you made the required deposits.

Indonesia never made good conditions for long term stay, and you must be financially very good off to meet the requirement.

I do not know your age, financial status....

I can say it only by considering the situation here in Japan together with my wife. We both are 52 years old. We do meet easily the requirements for Philippines or Thailand or Malaysia, but not for Australia/NewZealand or Indonesia.

I compare Japan with Thailand, Malaysia, Philippines and Australia/NewZealand. Out of that Philippines is offering the best conditions FOR MY WIFE AND ME to settle down.
We decided for other reasons however for Thailand.

I am sure, you see it different, as your position and our position is not the same.

Johann

... in response to Re: Resident status easy to get?, posted by Johann on Jan 18, 2004

The Philippines cannot in most ways be compared to Japan. Although both are 'asian' countries, Japan having one of the strongest economies currently, Philippines on the other side of the scale, they are as different as Yap and Russia.

Yes, IF you have US $75,000 to invest in an RP bank, (Where it is only insured to $2,000) and can leave it there untouched for 6 months, you may become eligible for the RSVP visa. There are other programs available for those who want to live in a gated in condo. None of this affects me in a positive way, nor does it help any of the 100+ expats that I know personally living here now. Like me, none of them desire to live in a gated community condo in a stinking polluted city.

For someone living anywhere outside Cebu or Manila, the immigration laws here are a major pain. Just the time involved every 59 days to renew ones visa is a pain in the ass, as it must be done from one of the major cities at a cost of up to P5,800 for 59 days. This does not include travel costs, hotel, etc for those who must come from the provinces. Some other smaller cities have a travel agent licensed to help with this, but most don't.

The same goes for attempting to change ones status. There is a myriad of day long hoops of fire involved in trying to get the 13A visa for spouse of a Philippine citizen. As soon as one jumps though all those burning hoops, they make more.

If one lived in the city, it would take weeks and a few hundred dollars.

However, if one lives in the provinces, you are talking about a minimum of a half dozen trips to the city, and a dozen nights in a hotel room. In this scenario, it can easily take months and thousands of dollars. Every time you complete all the requirements they told you to complete, they give you some more.

This wouldn't be so bad if you were not required to wait in a small non AC room with 45 other poor sods for entire days at a time, while the Immigration officer takes a siesta and decides IF he is coming back to work today. IF he chooses to come back to work today, he will give you one more little thing you must complete so that he doesn't have to do that much paperwork today. (They will NEVER tell you everything you have to do up front)

Mind you, this is for the "temporary" 13A, good for only one year. I shudder to think what trying to get a RESIDENT visa would be like.

I know a dozen expats here who have not renewed their visas for years. (One hasn't renewed in nearly 30 years) I fully understand why.

Larry.

... in response to Re: Re: Resident status easy to get?, posted by shadow on Jan 18, 2004

Good evening, Larry, and thank you very very much for your really informative posting. It is also a good warning for everybody, to be prepared, about what you can expect by immigration officers, when living in the Philippines.

Yes, you are absolutely right, my situation here in Tokyo, Japan cannot be compared to your situation as an US-citizen with Filipina-wife and living outside the big cities in Dumaguete in Negros.

Philippine government totally failed for many years, or better decades, to work out a clear regulation for status of residence, if a foreigner marries a Philippine citizen and decides to live in Philippines.

59 days, if you are married, but living there outside of Manila and Cebu is a hoax. This means, always on the visa-run. Transportation between the islands was never easy and a time waste. Hotel accommotation is not cheap.(I compare this always with Thailand, which is my favorite place)- Immigration officers in Philippines are doing or not doing, just what they like.

(I have my own experience at Manila airport, for departure, when the immigration told me, my visa was nearly overstayed. What is a nearly overstay?  Valid or expired? Never heard of a visa which is a nearly overstay. I had 21 days visa-free and I had no visa anyway, and I spent 19 days in Manila. --- It means, it is soon Christmas, and do you not have anything for my children.....and school is so expensive..and we have no money ...please Sir....
What immigration is this? All is corrupt there, from up to down and from right to left.... everywhere, everybody)

The main problem is, there is no solution in future - I never heard, they intend any revision of all these immigration laws.....it is more than overdue.

(In your case, just for your information, if you have a Japanese wife: Japanese immigration will give you at the beginning 3 months, then next time 6 months, then 1 year, 1 year again, and then 3 years...(you understand, many divorces....spouse visa) - but time is passing by, and permitted period is getting longer and longer....foreigner registration also will be extended from 3 to 7 years -  re-entry will be extended from single re-entry to multiple re-entry of 3 years and so on - Japanese law is quite reasonable and they just need to copy it for the Philippines)

I feel really sorry for you, but I am afraid, in your situation you cannot expect any improvement for the future. Or are you more optimistic?

-----
Japanese relations to the Philippine retirement visa are satisfactory:
1- distance is easy, 3 hours by plane from Tokyo to Cebu, maybe 350 usd for return ticket....even ok for a 1 night trip, just for short visit.
2- 75000 usd for a couple is not that problem here in Japan, and 35 years minimum age is really nice....
anyway this money is quickly used for condominum and you have the visas for lifetime.
3- usually Japanese people bring the older people there, for elderly care, as it is very expensive in Japan, so prefer to buy a condominium, with small swimmingpool, not far from city, near a supermarket,near a hospital, and employment of a maid to take care, maybe near a golf course....
4- However Japanese people are not so interested in the Philippines, usually we bring our old people, and not so many marriages between the Japanese man and the Filipina.
5- So we consider usd 75000,- acceptable, as we are NOT married to a Filipina usually, and we have NO personal relationship to Philippines, so what counts is really only the money.

------
Once again, thank you very much for your informations!
Good luck...maybe they change something in the next 50 years there....
But not sure - I can only pray for your luck at the Shinto Shrine behind our house! (as I do not belong to the Christian church)

Johann

... in response to Resident status easy to get? / No soluti..., posted by Johann on Jan 19, 2004

Considering NWA 747-400 takes me 4 1/2 hours to get from Tokyo to Manila, to get farther yet, to Cebu in three hours?

Do you charter a lear jet?

Or just hop on the space shuttle?

I also had a similar experience in Manila on departure once. My departure was exactly 21 days after my arrival. It took an extra 20 minutes to clear immigration as they had to find someone with the capability to count that far. Finally, someone came out of nowhere and agreed that I was within the 21 day limit.

Unsure exactly what I'm going to do about the visa thing here yet. I may try for Balikbayan this spring, but that is risky and not cheap either.

A balikbayan visa can be issued to a foriegner entering the country with his spouse of Philippine birth. However, lawfully they must both have been out of the country for 6 months. Most people report being able to circumfront this, but there have been some reports lately of people being turned down for balikbayan upon re-entry for not being out of the country for six months.

It would cost my wife and I roughly $700 US to fly out of the country and back. This is two months living expenses to us. To risk it all being for nothing is not a happy picture.

There are also boats to Malaysia, but reports are now that immigration in Zamboanga (port of entry) is turning everyone away for Balikbayan for not being away for 6 months. Sooo...

That's a later problem.

Right now, livin and lovin.

Larry.

... in response to Your plane is very fast!!, posted by shadow on Jan 19, 2004

Larry,

Has there been a recent change in the Balikbayan requirements? I remember reading a while back that the requirement was that the Filipino citizen must have been out of the country for at least a year. If it has been changed to 6 months, then I guess you could call that an improvement of sorts, but not really helpful in your case.

I have been checking on the Web and can’t find any Balikbayan references to a 6-month requirement. All the references I found still state that to qualify as a Balikbayan, a Filipino citizen had to either be out of the country continuously for at least one year, be an OCW, or be a naturalized former Filipino citizen. Spouses and children traveling with them were also eligible for the one year visa free entry.

It also indicated that the one-year balikbayan stay could be extended without leaving the country, for a fee, but it didn’t say what that fee was.

Do you remember Jim (the3js), maybe now (the4js)? I remember he said he had a permanent resident visa for the PI but I have no idea what he went through to get it. I think he may be in Angeles now.

I’m still considering retirement over there also. Thanks…

Ray

... in response to Balikbayan Rules, posted by Ray on Jan 20, 2004

You may be right, Ray. Everything I have heard here lately is about the 6 month requirement. I'll try to find out.

Many people get this requirement waived, be it 6 months or a year. I think a P500 note that mysteriously finds its way into your passport may be the key to this.

Larry

... in response to Your plane is very fast!!, posted by shadow on Jan 19, 2004

I would like to retire in the PI.  From what I read in these last posts it looks like the Philippine Gvt don't want foreigners.  They want women to leave go to American and European countries and send back money.   I was under the immpression that once married there would be a way for me go stay without a visa problem.  I am very confused about this subject, Daytona Beach is looking better all the time.
Lovin the living [while waiting]
Later Peter Lee

... in response to Re: Your plane is very fast!!, posted by Peter Lee on Jan 20, 2004

Getting anything done here is troublesome, at best, especially if it has anything to do with the government. It took us two solid weeks of jumping through hoops to get a marriage license.

We only got it then because I finally lost it and started yelling and screaming in the civil registrars office. They called the police. BUT, we had our marriage license ten minutes later!!! What to that point was impossible suddenly became as easy as changing an address on a form. Had I walked out like a docile little lamb, we probably never would have gotten one.

The Filipinos tend to let everybody walk all over them. They won't say anything, or raise a fuss. They walk docily out the door and come back another day, to be sent away again. Therefore, nothing ever gets done in a timely manner. Why do today what you can put off till next week?

Dumaguete seems to be very bad about this. The shops open at 9:30, close for lunch at 11:30, re-open at 2:00 (or maybe closer to 3:00) and close at 4:30 or 5:00. Often, people in charge do not even bother to come back after lunch.

Employees show up for work often hrs late, and sometimes the next day. When they do show, they will refuse to do things the way you ask them. Instead, they do it how they think you should have it. (Which will most always come back to haunt you) They have no work ethics implanted in their soul.

The cities are not so much this way. Cebu generally runs on time, or within 20 minutes of it anyway. This is a great place if you don't have to make money to live here, otherwise it can be very frusterating.

If indeed you are retiring, this can be a wonderful place, as even the workers are retired.

;)

Larry.

P.S. If you are entering the country with your filipina wife, you should have no problem obtaining the balikbayan visa. It is easiest to obtain it in the US before you leave. Then, you avoid all the problems and hassle I now face.

... in response to Resident status easy to get? / No soluti..., posted by Johann on Jan 19, 2004


  If you are not too far from an IC office, such as in Cagayan De Oro, which has one locally( It is right off of Corales ave, close to the water district office )I find it pretty easy to sty 6 months in the Philippines, at which point it is more of a hassle. A quick trip to Taiwan for a few days will allow you to start the process over. Some people have stayed a long time on that basis....kind of a hassle and expense, but not impossible.
  You are right, most Japanese do not much like the Philippines, and the few that visit seem totally unaware as to why they might not be liked there especially by the older people( Though some do come for diving etc ).
Mass murder(The death of one million filipinos), rape, and torture of many hundreds of thousands of filipinos, including the organization of rape camps where many tens of thousands of young filipinas were raped to death, well, all of this tended to sour the filipino on the Japanese experience in the past. However, filipinos are still smart enough to drive Toyotas for example...

Nathan

... in response to Re: Re: Resident status easy to get?, posted by shadow on Jan 18, 2004

[This message has been edited by don2222]

k

... in response to Internet dating is OK!, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

What a load of crap dude! I'll bet no American women would even give you the time of day. I suspect your mother ran off and left you when you where a child or something like that. Lets face it a large % of men go over seas to find a woman because no american women in there right mind would have anything to do with them! lol

Hum

... in response to Re: Internet dating is OK!, posted by Humabdos on Jan 17, 2004

Good thing your holding back Hum hehehehe!!!
I did see some ugly dudes in Cebu looking for a wife hehehe.  But not all were that bad looking either, when I talked to em they all had an AW in the past.  I think what they were looking for and couldn't explain was the Philippines is still locked into the 60's.  The music the customs and culture is what we had in the late 60's.   So when the old guys go there it reminds them of a past and memories that was good.  Then to top it off younger women fight for em.  What a formula, I asked the men there how come your'not angry we take away all your women?   They said we only take the ugly ones LOL.  I noticed the men there have different tast of women that we do.

Even at 60 I have a good chance at some of the younger women in my Cardio Kickbox class.  I'm getting em nice and shaped up for someone.  Can't guarantee much of a trade in for your old car but if he gets tired of driving the same old car you can consider a trade in without going 9000 miles LOL.

So tell us Johann?  Would an American woman give you the time of day or not?

... in response to Re: Re: Internet dating is OK!, posted by Peter Lee on Jan 17, 2004

Hi,
Your question:
Would an American woman give you the time of day or not?

My reply:
Why should I ask an American woman to give me the time of day?
Any reason to do so?
Or
Do you mean, she will come straight to me by herself, giving me the time of the day, because she wants to surprise me?

You should know about me:
1- I am not an US-citizen,
2- I am not living in the USA,
3- As I am not an US-citizen and as I am not living in the USA, there is no need for me to travel outside of the USA to look for a foreign wife and also no need to enter the USA to look for an American woman.
4- No need to go 9000 miles.... I am living in Japan and own my condominium in Thailand.
5- I never had an AW (American woman?) - see above explications 1,2 and 3.
6- I have already my AW (Asian wife)
7- Neither my wife nor I have any intention to move into the USA for a living.

You wrote:
I asked the men there how come your'not angry we take away all your women? They said we only take the ugly ones LOL. I noticed the men there have different tast of women that we do.

Reply:
Yes, this is true - you can read up the reasons for that on my homepage.

Your question:
we take away ALL your women?

Reply:
Do you know, how many people are living in Asia???

Compared to the population in the USA (about 280 million) there is alone China (1247 million).... no need to be worried, there are still plenty of women leftover here in Asia for everybody.

How many women are entering the USA from Asia for the reason of marriage? Do you have any information about that?
I think, all in all, not so many.... Even if EVERY man from the USA takes a Chinese girl as his wife, there will be still plenty girls remain in China....

I did not consider the rest of Asia....there are almost 80 million living in the Philippines, over 200 million living in Indonesia, over 70 million living in Vietnam......the list continues....Korea, Japan, Thailand, Burma, India ......

Even if you convert USA into a Muslim country and everyone out of you takes 4 wives.... still there will be Asian women in Asia...

Take it easy, no need to worry!
Johann

... in response to Re: Internet dating is OK!, posted by Humabdos on Jan 17, 2004

Hi,
1- I am not an US-citizen,
2- I am not living in the USA,
3- As I am not an US-citizen and as I am not living in the USA, there is no need for me to travel outside of the USA to look for a foreign wife and also no need to enter the USA to look for an American woman.

4- Who are you? Reading your stupid posting, I think, you are one out of these feminists, who are a desprate leftover everywhere in the States.
No wonder, that many US-men prefer to marry a foreign wife.

Johann

... in response to I am not from the USA! , posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

OK Arnold so you don't live in the USA! please stop repeating yourself! lol
Boy are you Germans touchy!
Aso so who am I. Well first of all I'm no feminists I'm a man who is married to a Filipina. Second you are the stranger who marched in here like Hitler telling us what the "man must do"
Like Ray said had you introduced yourself a little differently you might have received a better welcome.

It looks like your looking for support of your white women hater club. I'm sorry your mother ran out on you like that but please don't put down all white women like that. I realize that most of the women from your home land are butt ugly but don't lump our white women in with them.

Hum

P.S Welcome to PL! ;-)

... in response to Internet dating is OK!, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

Wait a minute. Your living in Japan and you are married to a Japanese?? Living in her native country isn't much of anything to Bragg about in terms length of marriage. From reading your lack of Angier Management post below, I'm sure that if your Japanese wife was living here in America with you, your marriage would be very Brief. So instead of Boasting about your long term marriage with explanations on how to be successful in international dating, you would be crying in your beer, talking about your marriage failure LoL. Not once do I believe Your Crap that "It's the Man" that should do Everything. Sounds like your wife is some kinda slave in Japan. Maybe your way of thinking works in a Ladies native country, where she was taught to be submissive to her Husband, but it wouldn't work for long in America. Anyway, welcome to PL with` your BS post. Come back with a succesful marriage report after Your wife has lived in good ole USA for a lenght of time, otherwise your post is full of Crap.

... in response to Your married 27yrs and counting?? Bravo, posted by greg on Jan 17, 2004

Thanks for your explications.

The point is, that you are right - in the view of USA and Philippines. However not all men, who are looking for a foreign wife from Asia are from the States.

In my case, I am from Europe, and we see this and that somehow different from people living in the States, so what you consider as my post is full of crap, I might think about your post is full of crap in return. We cannot share so easily the same opinion, because we have a different way of life in a different place in this world.

We have also rather different visa-regulations in Europe (easy for the future foreign wife to enter for a visit for 2 or 3 months - totally different from the immigration system of the States), different ideas about a foreign wife (for example your profil says Russian women = no way, for me it is the Latina woman = no way). Different ideas, what the man should do, and what the wife should do and so on.

My Japanese wife was living with me 5 years in my homecountry (Austria, Europe) before moving to Japan 1981. We married in Europe, not in Japan.

And of course, we both have no intention at all to live in the States, we will continue in Asia, now in Japan, and for retirement to Thailand.

Generally said, as long as both, man and wife, agree with their way of living together, I do not see any problem. What might end in divorce in USA, might not end necessarily in the same way in Japan or in Europe.

We will see about our daughter - she married an US-citizen in Canada, and is now living in Hawaii. My daughter had such a lot of formalities for moving into the USA, while living in Canada - unbelieveable in Europe-

What I wrote, is the view of an European man, who has no intention to bring his foreign wife into the USA and who is not forced by immigration to meet his future foreign wife first outside of the USA -
as I heard, many US citizen do not like that regulation, but the way, how it is done in Europe has also its problems -

So it is interesting and useful for me to hear your opinion as an US-citizen, who is also married to an Asian woman.

I hope this will explain to you, why my opinion is different from yours.
Anyway, this should be no reason not to talk to each other.

Best regards, Johann

... in response to Re: Your married 27yrs? Yes, but I am no..., posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

to live in your wife's native country with her. I don't know much about the people of Europe, and I'm not married to an Asian nor anyone else for that matter(never married). I personally feel that America is one of the most difficult countries to keep your marriage. I would rather relocate to her native country than to bring her here. God Bless

... in response to Hi Johann, that was wise of you, posted by greg on Jan 17, 2004

You said a very important point:
I would rather relocate to her native country than to bring her here. God Bless

Yes, consider it!
Interracial/International marriage is seen by many US-citizen to find a girl and to bring her into the USA.

This kind of image was made out maybe of the presence of the US military in many parts of the world... US soldier brings freedom to any nation far away from the USA, falls in love with a poor innocent girl there and brings her back to the States.... -

Times are changing, also in Asia.
It works in the other direction as well.

Here in Tokyo working as technician, I know about 20 couples personally, where the man is from USA, and the wife is Japanese, Filipina, Vietnamese, Thai, Chinese.....Most of them living here over 20 years, nobody considering to move back to the States. -
Same with some couples I know in Taiwan, Thailand, Malaysia and Singapore.

So if you can get a job in Asia,it makes sense for us men to move out from Europe or from the States. Distances are considerable long to Asia, and I gave everything up in Europe, even my father moved on to Japan when he was 85 years old. Now 97 years old. For me absolutely no way to return.

It makes sense for the US-man or European man, later on, to consider retirement in Asia. As I see from your profil, you are almost 50 years old... if you have no wife, and some savings, you should consider early retirement in Philippines or other cheap Asian country. Especially if you are out of job with 55 or such problems. Permission for settle down in Thailand, Malaysia and Philippines are easy to get and you find a local nice wife there easily (without any troubles you mentioned about marriage in the USA - not by registration and not by the girl herself)

Foreigners are welcome, costs are remarkable cheap, and the only important point is, you should buy your own accomodation, you should bring some savings with you. I have already an apartment in Thailand for our retirement.

So I am not worried about my future, and as one reader of this forum posted: Would an American woman gives you the time of the day.....I do not need an American woman at all.

Johann

... in response to Hi Johann, that was wise of you, posted by greg on Jan 17, 2004

Filipinas and Latinas make good wifes, Russian Women No Way. So I guess you misunderstood.

... in response to my profile says, posted by greg on Jan 17, 2004

Hi, good afternoon,
I think, sometimes my English is not so good, anyway it is not my native language....
As I feel somehow half/half (from Europe,but living in Japan) - so I can comment only on that situation of these areas.
Yes, I understand, that for YOU, Latina and Asian girl is interesting, but the Russian girl is out of question.
For ME - and for many others in Europe, it is different, we do not like the Latina, have some feelings for the Asians (but not really so many...just indeed some of us), and all of them like the Russian wife. -

About Europe:
Our position is different, if you look on a map. When I was still in Europe, Communist border was east of Vienna (Austria), and taking a visa permit and driving over the border was a 30 miles, about 40 minutes from my home. - People are same to us like in Western Europe, many native German speakers (German speaking area in Europe is about 120 million people, so not such a little group) - the Communist area was heavily restricted for the SAME people living there, many of them just separated because of the Second World War. Possible to visit, but impossible to bring them over the border to the West. Now borders are open, but economics are totally down in Eastern Europe. On the Western side, local women especially living outside of big towns are moving away, renting a room in the next city...About 1 million young men out of the German area (especially rural area) cannot find their own wives, because there is no one available.

About Japan:
Here in Japan we have a similar problem, young women are moving out of rural areas, and the only way not to live alone there, is a foreign wife -  however most Japanese men are looking for a Chinese or other Asian wife, for somebody, who can speak/write Chinese/Korean/Japanese ...It is not difficult, to bring somebody into Japan for a visit to try it out and see if you like to live together in the future. You pay the invitation as a sponsor, but the person is forced to leave again Japan within 2-3 months - It is not difficult to visit Korea or China (just 1 hour by plane for Korea, usd 250,- for return ticket for example, about 25 jumbo-jets per day) - Yes, it is looking for wives, but situation cannot be compared to the USA, we can meet easily in both directions, and marriage registration formalities are not so important.

What makes the difference compared to USA:

In USA, in the same area you will find white, black, latino, Asians .... so looks does not matter.

Europe is different, and the ordinary man is looking for a wife, who looks similar to him, so if you see them together, you cannot see any difference, if she is a local or from outside - So the Russian wife is fitting best.

Language is another point, English is widely spoken, but for sure not our native language (except England/Ireland) - so most young men are looking out for somebody, who has advanced German speaking knowledge.

About USA:
I hope, it is not boring for you to hear, how the situation is seen by a man, who is not related to the USA.

In USA, as far as I can see, there are lot of complaints by both, men and women about violence, discrimination, feminists, misuse and so on. It is obviously much more difficult to keep a marriage running successfully, compared to Europe or Japan.

This is, what I am calling a TOLERANCE level (my point 6 on the list), if you feel you are right, and still you are not claiming it - This feeling is somehow missing in the USA.
For example, violence is 20 times higher in USA compared to all other developed countries in this world. - So what might be an argument for some feminists in USA, is not an argument here in Japan. (Maybe you will call me in return, that my wife is my slave, but as a fact, there is no violence in our home at all and it is still the same marriage after 27 years - but this is another matter)

It seems to be much more difficult in formalities, takes much longer, and is much more expensive for an US citizen to look out for a foreign wife and to bring her back to the USA compared to Europe or here in Japan.

This is another reason for wild disputes between men and women, living in the USA. - Generally we think here in Japan (and same in Europe) that you have your right to choose your partner and to bring him/her with you to your home-country (without any extra expenses or formalities) - there is no understandings by non-US-citizens like me, why should this be more difficult or more expensive. Just these expenses and formalities are arguments for radical feminist groups to accuse you, that you BUY your foreign wife. Of course you again will talk back, accusing them they are greedy, demanding, envy you .....

Just for your understandings -  so you have your problems as US-citizen, and as a fact, we have other problems, but not the same problems.....

Regards,
Johann

... in response to Re: my profile says /misunderstandings, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

You said "violence is 20 times higher in USA compared to all other developed countries in this world." I assume you were referring to violence in the context of relationships and marriage. This is nonsense. Perhaps REPORTED violence is 20 times higher, but the little dark secret is that most domestic violence goes unreported. During my last visit to Japan there was a TV program about the huge amount of spousal abuse in Japanese marriages, and how it is nearly never reported. Unlike in the US, where it's in the open, in Japan, it's cosidered private business between the married couple. The overall incidence is about the same in both countries - at least that's what was reported in the documentary.

BTW - welcome to the board. My grandparents were from Vienna and I also am married to a Japanese woman. We just had our 18th anniversary, and live in California USA. Though it's a popular notion on this board, I have no interest in retiring in a third world country. I spend too much time in the third world on business. Give me Vienna, Osaka, Seattle, or Stockholm any old day.

- Jeff

... in response to I don't agree, posted by Jeff S on Jan 19, 2004

Thanks a lot for your nice message.
It is now 3AM have to go to bed...

This message board has something like one problem, it cannot be sorted for date... so it is difficult to see, what is a new message, not read yet, and what is an old message....

How do you look up your messages on this board?

About the violence rate and so on, yes is difficult, I tell you tomorrow, how this figure was calculated....

Retirement: Thailand....apartment is ready,
no way back to Europe, nothing there anymore...even my father is living here....

Best regards,

and will reply tomorrow....

Johann

... in response to Internet dating is OK!, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

Hey Johann, where in Tokyo are you?  I used to live in Saitama prefecture for about a year and a half before moving back to La-La Land, CA.

A few comments...
"3- It is the man, who has to get on the plane first..."
99% of the time this is true.  But FWIW, my wife actually came to visit ME first.  Yes, we are a freaky wierd couple and an exception to the rule. (One of the nice things about courting someone with a nice cushy gov't job and tourist yen to spare.)

"4- It is the man, who has to study... Do not expect your girl to study about you!"
In practical principle, I agree with Ray.  A general rule of thumb is, whoever does the moving will ultimately need to do the most studying. (As you now live in Tokyo, the situation is reverse in your case to the norm of the woman moving to where the man lives.)  Though initially the woman may THINK she doesn't have to do any studying because, since they probably get all kinds of American or Western movies exported to her country, she thinks she already knows all about American or Western culture (a false assumption she will realize soon after she's been here a while).

"5- It is the man, who has to introduce your girl to your local life..."
Yes, just as she will do it for you when making return visits to her hometown.  The one danger in this is that you may develop a "teacher-student" relationship to the detriment of your "husband-wife" relationship.  The sooner she learns the lay of the land and develops her own strengths and independence, the sooner you can return to the equal partnership most guys here I think are truly looking for.

"6- It is the man, who has to be prepared to exercise an extraordinary amount of TOLERANCE..."
As Ray says, this cuts both ways, though IMO works differently for each partner.  The spouse who left his/her homeland (typically the woman) must have patience with the whole situation of being a stranger in a strange land and having to relearn the most basic of daily chores and habits.  If the man in America has a habit of being short tempered, he WILL have to exercise a great deal more patience that he's used to.  If they have a quarrel, anything he says can and will be used against him in a court of law.  If he is a stupid jerk enough to threaten her immirgration status during a fight, it is considered psychological abuse and will get him in deep doo-doo with the BCIS.  She has a lot of legal protection and can hurt him a lot more than he can hurt her if he doesn't watch himself.

FWIW, the more foreign (Western) girls I met while in Japan, the more I appreciated how lucky I was to have my sweet, peaceful, gentle, thoughtful, kind, soulful, and talented kawaii Japanese woman.

... in response to Konichiwa, and comments, posted by Bob S on Jan 17, 2004

Good evening, and thank you for your friendly reply.
Most of my reply to GREG says quite everything, sorry - but different people have different opinions.

We are not from the USA, we are not accustomed to US-regulations, we have different ideas about how to live together as a family.....
We both are not interested in living in USA, why should we?

About my daily life, you can find all and everything on my homepage
(http://www2.gol.com/users/johann)

Most users of this board are from USA or somehow related to the USA.
There are however some, like me, who have no relation to the USA at all. This means, that my opinion might be different - this should however not be a reason not to talk to each other or to post here. For me it is interesting to hear the opinion of people, living in the USA.

I married in Europe, Austria (1976) and moved later on into Japan (1981)with my wife, so I am not an example for the opposite direction as you might think.

Yes, I agree, Japanese or other Asian wife is much better than any of these feminist power-ladies from Europe or from the States.

So please consider my opinion as from a person, who has nothing to do with the life you are accustomed in the USA.

Thank you!
Johann

... in response to Re: Konichiwa, and comments, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

Relax, amigo.  So you're Austrian?  Fine.  So's our governor.  It doesn't change the principle of what I was saying.  Delete "American" and "Japanese" and insert "Spanish" and "German" or "Estonian" and "Italian".  The basic rule is still the same.  Whoever does the moving does the most studying.

Our situation is different from most guys here in that it was/is still easier for our girlfriend or fiancee from Japan to visit us in our afluent Western countries.  No visa required for short-term stay tourists.  The same cannot be said for the guys on this board searching for Fillapinas, Vietnamese girls, Russians, Ukrainians, and so on.  So I hope you'll understand if many here are not so open to your ideas.

And you are lucky to be able to live in your wife's country.  I'd love to move back to the Kanto area if I could find a job that pays the same as I can make here in California.  But my Nihongo skills are inadequate for the job of anything more than Pet Gaijin English Teacher (been there, done that). 8-(

... in response to Same Difference, posted by Bob S on Jan 19, 2004

Hi, thanks a lot for your nice message to me.
You know, this message board has a problem, it is difficult to find out which messages are new, and which one I read already. - It is always possible to put some new message between.
The board has an advantage however, it is free of adult materials, and separated in Asia, Latin and Russian.

Yes, I am Austrian, but a permanent Japanese resident (permission not related to Japanese wife) and also my father is living here in Tokyo with us (now 97 years old)

This is an English board, so of course center is USA - and on the other side is Philippines.
The problem is, as you said correctly, Philippines Immigration Laws are a hoax. (like Larry's good posting)
However USA Immigration Laws are also strange, rejecting the possibility of a visit (invitation) - some adjustments should be done about.

There are no problems for me at all (European Community - Japan - USA)-
but there are problems if you are like my friend from Former Yugoslavia, living in Japan, and have a Thai wife...
Or if you are a Japanese, inviting a Chinese from Mainland..
Visits up to 3 months are however possible, and as you know, take Philippines as an example, it is just usd 350,- for a return ticket, 3 hours by plane....

So all and everything is much easier for me from Japan, compared from the USA.
You are right about that.
Hope you find this message out of this board.

Let us stay in contact....
Thank you again
Johann from Tokyo

... in response to Re: Konichiwa, and comments, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

Your daughter is beautiful.
What a lucky guy.

... in response to Internet dating is OK!, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

“It is the man, who has to study the language, the culture and all about the social background of the girl - Do not expect your girl to study about you!”

“It is the man, who has to be prepared to exercise an extraordinary amount of TOLERANCE towards his girl from abroad in case of any quarrel.”

I beg to differ with you, but marriage is a two-way street. The female partner better get with the program also or you’re likely to end up with only half a marriage.

Ray

... in response to Huh?, posted by Ray on Jan 17, 2004

Seems that only no.4 and no.6 is irritating you, and that you agree with 1,2,3 and 5.
There is no much difference between your and my opinion, as far as I can see.

You wrote:
I beg to differ with you, but marriage is a two-way street. The female partner better get with the program also or you’re likely to end up with only half a marriage.---

Easy said, but:
I agree, this is the way it should be. But this female partner is not the girl next door, this is a girl of different race, different religion, different education, different native language and living in a different part of this world.

about 4)

It is you, the man, who will continue your life as before, while the girl will move from her native country to your place. It is the girl, who is facing new living conditions and neighbourhood, and not you. The girl has to accept that as a fact, with less or more problems.

I think, in this sense you as the man should do the first step and try to know about the girl and her background, language and culture and should consider that, even before bringing her to your home in your country. This helps a lot to avoid plenty of misunderstandings and supports a long term relationship.

about 6)
is quite similar to 4)
but after her arrival at your home:
Feminists, racists and other more or less useless people, who do not like multi-racial marriage, are always coming up quickly with such arguments like violence, misuse, and blaming the man for all and everything, if something goes wrong.
I just want to say, that multi-racial marriage is sometimes indeed more difficult than if you take a girl just next door and where you quarrel about your differences with her as 1:1.
Some extra tolerance is surely required by the man, if your girl is from overseas. I think, nothing wrong if you (but better of course both of you)are well-prepared for unsuspected unpleasent surprises sometimes.....

Johann

... in response to Re: Huh?, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

It is NOT always the man who continues life as before, and brings the princess to his country to live happily ever after.

There are thousands of expats living here in the Philippines with their brides. Life is NEVER as before for EITHER party.

Larry.

... in response to about #4., posted by shadow on Jan 18, 2004

4- It is the man, who has to study the language, the culture and all about the social background of the girl - Do not expect your girl to study about you!

I agree, I am living since 1981 in Japan.
I wonder, how I could do a living in Japan without considering #4 on my list.

To move into Asia and to live here with your Asian wife is the best!

Johann

... in response to Re: Huh?, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

I hate to burst your bubble, but I'm not irritated and I don't agree with 1,2,3, and 5.

In fact, I really don't have any idea what you are mumbling about. LOL!

Ray

... in response to Re: Re: Huh?, posted by Ray on Jan 17, 2004

So what is your advice?
What do you think, is the best way, to contact a girl living in Asia for marriage and to bring her back to your home?
Johann

... in response to Any other advice?, posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

Johann,

There is no best or worse way to meet someone from a foreign
country for marriage.  More importantly is what the two of you do once you meet. A good relationship should have a balance, with each partner willing to give and take. Try to understand the other person's points of view, religious, cultural, etc..

The internet is one of the greatest communication tools ever.
People should not be discouraged to use it as an aid in finding Mr. or Mrs. Right. Just remember trust is earned not given.

Don't waste your time trying to get answers from Ray.
Once he doesn't agree with your opinion he will just attack you. He will never answer your questions. He's too narrow minded. Also, you as you will see he always has to have the last word.

Cheers
Dingo ( USA )

... in response to Re: Any other advice?, posted by Dingo on Jan 17, 2004

Thank you very much for your reply.
As I said, I am not from the USA, but from Europe and now living in Japan and have some different opinion. Anyway my 6 points are the way I would recommend to everybody to consider, if he is looking for a foreign wife, for what reason ever.

Yes, internet must remain totally open for search for a foreign partner, and I am against any radical feminist, who wants to restrict that.

About Ray:
Thank you for your comments about Ray, as far as I can see, he made about 2500 postings - his profil does not contain any information about him and his way to post is strange....some postings contain useful informations, some are empty, some are just verbal attacks  -
maybe a former US-military serviceman, who has good knowledge about US-immigration and the Philippines, and all, what is different from that is attacked. He cannot understand, that his opinion is just one out of many opinions on this board.

I can only guess....such people usually do not provide any information about themselves....

And there is no obligation for me to reply to him...

Johann

... in response to Ray (and similar people), posted by Johann on Jan 17, 2004

Hey Johann,

Are you here to make trouble or participate in a civil manner? You can take your “similar people” and “such people” comments and stick them where the sun don’t shine.

Did I say that my opinion was any better than yours or anyone else's here? All I did was disagree with your premise that the man in these relationships has primary responsibility for making the marriage work. Are you so insecure that you can't tolerate a differing opinion from your own? Why did you automatically assume that I was irritated with your opinions? It seems that YOU were irritated with the fact that someone dared to disagree with you.

Now, why don't you simply express your opinions and share your experiences without the arrogant know-it-all attitude that you are here to teach us all about relationships with foreign women? We really don’t need a lecture, thank you.

If you try a little humility, then perhaps you would get a more friendly reception :-)

Now you have a nice day...

Ray

... in response to Give it a rest buddy!, posted by Ray on Jan 18, 2004

Ray,
 All the guy(Johann) initially did to set you off was to use the word "Irritate" when referencing your response to his list.  He was very civil in answering all your comments even though you sure were not very nice to him.   Then you came back and ridiculed him by calling his posts "mumbling".   Now you have the nerve to jump HIM for being impolite?   :)    I have noticed in the years I have been here on PL that every time somebody disagrees with you, you ridicule them to the point of being ridiculous then turn around and jump them for the slightest attempt to defend themselves.   That’s about as hypocritical as you can get in my opinion.    I think you need to back away and look at yourself as somebody else would see you.

   You did the same to Dingo.   Why is he a Troll?   Is it because he disagrees with you?  It’s funny but I thought a Troll was someone who comes to a board and posts only to get a reaction while taking no real active role in the purpose of the discussion.    That doesn’t fit Dingo at all.  

   SteveG

 

... in response to I agree with Bryan 100%, posted by SteveG on Jan 18, 2004

Hi Steve,

Re Dingo, you said “Why is he a Troll? Is it because he disagrees with you? It’s funny but I thought a Troll was someone who comes to a board and posts only to get a reaction while taking no real active role in the purpose of the discussion. That doesn’t fit Dingo at all.”

You don’t have to take my word for it Steve. In Dingo’s own words: “I'm not here to attack "others" just YOU. Also I'm here to put your sorry stink hole in your place.” NOW do you understand why I called Dingo a TROLL? That’s EXACTLY why he is here, as he admits, to start fights and disrupt the board. He has made unprovoked personal attacks on several members in recent weeks, including petty insulting comments directed at another member’s wife. Yes Steve, Dingo is a pathetic little trouble-maker. I think he is going through some personal crisis and doesn’t know how to deal with it, so he comes here to stir up crap and disrupt. I wish he would seek some professional help. Until then, I reserve the right to defend myself against his garbage, whether you like it or not.

I just wanted to clear that up for you since you seemed so concerned for poor little innocent Dingo. LOL!

Ray

... in response to From the horse's (Dingo's) mouth..., posted by Ray on Jan 19, 2004

Yes Ray it is true,
If you bad mouth me then sorry Charlie but I have a right
to respond back to YOU as well. If that makes me a troll
then everyone who disagrees with you is a troll as well.

I have been on this board for as long as most members.
This board is for expressing opinions and contributing ideas.
If you can't handle someone elses opinion then get busy working
on your www.planet-ignorant.com board and you can have it
all to yourself.

If another member male or female disagrees with me I'm going to respond in kind.  I know Ray you've never had a disagreement with a women before right? LOL !!!!!!!!

I agree with the other posters who have commented that you
need to start showing some manners and quit being so arrogant in your postings to new members and people who are not originally from this country.  Something tells me that will Never happen.

Your attempts at being a psychiatrist are pathetic. Maybe you
can figure why you're so obnoxious and arrogant before you try figuring out someone else.  For starters why do you spend 24 hours a day 7 days a week 52 weeks a year on this board fighting with every one you disagree with and not
stopping until you've had the last word?

Not a whole lot else going on in your life I would guess. How sad.

Cheers.
Dingo

... in response to Re: From the downer cow's (Ray's) mouth...., posted by Dingo on Jan 19, 2004

Gee, I'm so honored to be the most important person in your pathetic little life Dingo. Here’s a homework assignment for you. Go stand in front of the mirror and ask yourself these questions:

1. Why am I spending all of my time trying to start fights on PL instead of spending some quality time with my family?

2. Why can't I sleep at night because of my burning hatred for Ray?

3. Why doesn't Ray get pissed at my childish insults? How am I ever going to make him mad? Should I attack his wife maybe? No, that didn't work with Bear.

4. Why doesn't Ray ever let me have the last word? Just because I threw the first stone and started all this mess, he should still let me have the last word. It just isn't fair! What am I going to do?!

5. Why do I feel like I am going to cry? I just can't handle this anymore. When is Ray going to let me have my way instead of calling my bluff? How did he ever figure out my secret that I am really nothing but a little troll?

6. Why doesn’t anybody here on this forum believe my pathetic lies? Is it possible that they aren’t as stupid as I thought?

7. Why is my life so screwed up? Why did Ray put a hex on me and cause every single problem in my life? How did he do that anyway?

8. Why doesn’t Ray hate me like I hate him? It just isn’t fair!

That’s O.K. Dingo, you don’t have to answer those questions here in public. After all, haven’t you already embarrassed yourself enough here? But I would strongly recommend that you write down your answers and show them to your psychiatrist at your next session.

Poor little sick Dingo. Get some help! You need it… :-)

Ray

... in response to Well, well, well, posted by Ray on Jan 20, 2004

Everything your saying is 100% true about YOURSELF. I will pray for you.

... in response to Well, well, well, posted by Ray on Jan 20, 2004

Ray you've just done a GREAT job of analyzing YOURSELF.
See 1-8 all apply to YOU !!!!

Koodos!!!!

ATTACK, ATTACK, ATTACK !!!!!

Cheers Dingo

... in response to Well, well, well, posted by Ray on Jan 20, 2004

Diaper man Ray were your fingers bleeding after you typed that?
ROTFLMAO

Cheers Dingo

Attack, Attack, Attack !!!!

... in response to Re: Well, well, well, posted by Dingo on Jan 20, 2004

Hey Ray and Dingo,

You guys are killing me! I think I just soiled my diaper for the second day in a row from laughing so hard! I think you guys are really becoming good friends. ROFLMAOCUMSLPASIMMDFD!!!

Dave H.

... in response to Oops I Did It Again!, posted by Dave H on Jan 20, 2004

I think your right Dave H hehehe

... in response to Oops I Did It Again!, posted by Dave H on Jan 20, 2004

[This message has been edited by Ray]

ROTFLTNTSMMFD!

Hey Dave, where have you been hiding?

You need to be real careful around here or some bozo might accuse you of being part of the “Planet Love Power Structure”. If you ever want to join the “Click” (ROFLMDGAO!), let us know and we’ll send you an application form. Jimbo is the treasurer, so you’ll have to make arrangements with him for the dues. We’re running a special this month, where you get a really cool free magic froggy clicker if you sign up before the end of the month (Click! Click! Click!).

http://www.frogstore.com/products/UY1029FC.asp

Send me the bill for your diaper service and I'll take care of it for you. Don't you know the disposables are the new rave now? I’ve been using them for years (LOL).

Do you think I should let Dinko have the last word so he will stop his incessant whining and crying? Oh well, I’m sure that he would just find something else to cry about anyway (CUMMFLA!)

Ray

... in response to Re: Oops I Did It Again!, posted by Ray on Jan 20, 2004

Hey Ray,
Don't blow a gasket!

http://www.gamewyrd.com/pictures/angry.jpg

Cheers
Dingo

... in response to I agree with Bryan 100%, posted by SteveG on Jan 18, 2004

Hi Steve,

Let me see if I can address some of your concerns.

Actually, the “mumbling” remark was directed more at some of the weird stuff this guy was saying, like “There is no reason, why you should try to find a local woman…”. What is that supposed to mean? What does he care if someone tries to find a “local woman”? I can think of many reasons why some guy might want to do just that, can’t you Steve? Perhaps it none of HIS business who any other guy seeks out for a partner, don’t you agree?

How about “It is the man, who decides, how and where to look for his girl from Asia or from any other place in this world - and this is nobody's else business.” So? Why come to THIS forum and preach to us about our right to look for a foreign woman??? That statement just didn’t make sense in the context of his “discussion”.

Or this: “It is the man, who is searching around the internet and due to far distance, you have to collect informations and contacts by surfing through various sites first, and this is not the business of some radical feminists and racists to prevent you to collect contact informations”. What the heck does all that mean? Can a woman not also use the Internet to collect “informations and contacts”? Is there somebody on this forum telling the guy that he can’t use the Internet? I’m sorry, but it just didn’t make sense Steve.

How about “It is the man, who has to get on the plane first - and check personally, what is going on at the other end of that internet-contact.....this is THE MOST IMPORTANT POINT to be successful to find a foreign woman for marriage.” Huh? Is getting on the plane first “THE MOST IMPORTANT POINT” to be successful? Why can’t a woman get on a plane first? Do you agree with that stuff Steve? Makes little sense to me.

I don’t know how his post came across to you Steve, but what I saw was man filled with hatred for feminists and white women. Is there something wrong with white women Steve? My mother, my sisters, and my daughters are “white women”. Does he hate white women?? It sounded that way to me. Some of that stuff sounds almost racist, and definitely insulting. All this “It is the man” stuff completely ignores the fact that there are also WOMEN out there looking for a foreign mate and you have seen then right here on this board Steve. I don’t think ranting or mumbling was that far off, but that’s just me I guess.

As for your comments about Dingo, what can I say? Do you know what a troll is Steve? You’ve been here long enough to know better I think. If this doesn’t sound like an unprovoked attack, written with the sole intent of starting a fight, then you’re just strange Steve: “Don't waste your time trying to get answers from Ray. Once he doesn't agree with your opinion he will just attack you. He will never answer your questions. He's too narrow minded. Also, you as you will see he always has to have the last word.” Sorry, but that is definitely a troll in my book! Dingo has apparently been stewing for a long time and couldn’t wait for the opportunity to take a cheap shot. Yep, what a “man”! ROFLMGDAO!

Anyway, thanks for your comments and personal “attacks” Steve :-)

Ray

... in response to Re: You agree with Bryan 100%?, posted by Ray on Jan 18, 2004

As for your comments about Dingo, what can I say? Do you know what a troll is Steve? You’ve been here long enough to know better I think. If this doesn’t sound like an unprovoked attack, written with the sole intent of starting a fight, then you’re just strange Steve: “Don't waste your time trying to get answers from Ray. Once he doesn't agree with your opinion he will just attack you. He will never answer your questions. He's too narrow minded. Also, you as you will see he always has to have the last word.” Sorry, but that is definitely a troll in my book! Dingo has apparently been stewing for a long time and couldn’t wait for the opportunity to take a cheap shot. Yep, what a “man”! ROFLMGDAO!

Anyway, thanks for your comments and personal “attacks” Steve :-)

Ray

My reply:
Well Ray again you're confused. My reply was NOT unprovoked
you just got through "trashing the Newbie Johann" and I was replying to "YOUR" arrogant post.

It was not a "cheap shot" it was very fair and accurate.
Just try reading your own posts.

If you don't agree with someone you will attack them.
You won't answer questions.
And of course you always have to have the last word.

Speaking of Stewing for a long time, time for you to change your diaper.  "Ok now that was a cheap shot" Bwahh haaa!!!!

Cheers
Dingo

... in response to Re: Re: You agree with Bryan 100%?, posted by Dingo on Jan 19, 2004

Oh please Dingo, don't insult our intelligence by claiming that you were only protecting the poor little innocent "newbie". You're nothing but a fake!

You've been waiting for a chance to throw more stones and start another fight ever since the last time you made a total ass of yourself on this forum. I know that you’ve been lying awake at night trembling with hatred for me and anyone else who exposes your stupid little game. So what? You just admitted that your whole purpose here is to attack me, so why don’t you just drop the bull crap bleeding heart nonsense and get on with your attack. After all, it’s what you live for according to your own admission.

Dingo: “Ray I'm not here to attack "others" just YOU. Also I'm here to put your sorry stink hole in your place.”

I can’t stand it, I’m going to die laughing! You think that scared me with that pathetic little threat of yours? What a dork! Go ahead Dingo, continue making an ass of yourself. It’s quite entertaining you know :-)

And what is this nonsense you’ve been spouting that I don’t answer questions on this forum??? Are you a complete moron or just the biggest liar that ever lived? Would you like to place a wager on who has answered more poster’s questions on this forum Dingo, you or I? No, I didn’t think so.

I’ll tell you what bozo, I’ll keep answering questions here whenever I think I can be of help and you do keep doing what you are good at, starting flame wars and disrupting the forum. That seems to be all that you are good for, you arrogant little liar!

Now stop with the bull crap before I bust a gut laughing! Attack away little man… CUMFLATNTPIMPWITTKFCWL!

Your buddy forever,

Ray :-)

... in response to You are such a phony!, posted by Ray on Jan 20, 2004

projecting his feelings of inadequacy on to others. A common defense mechanisim for folks with low self esteem and inferiority complex. He makes these really intense posts that you can see are filled with angst and hatred and ends them with ROTL. As if were supposed to believe hes on the floor laughing and not red in the face frantically typing with veins popping out of his forehead.

Lighten up dude its just a message board

... in response to its obvious Ray is, posted by bryan on Jan 20, 2004

Hey Bryan, that was a great post.
I especially like the part about him being "Red in the face
with veins a popping" God I hope we don't kill the guy.

http://www.gamewyrd.com/pictures/angry.jpg

Ray sure did a good job "Anal"yzing  himself.
Man what a hypocrite!

Cheers
Dingo

... in response to its obvious Ray is, posted by bryan on Jan 20, 2004

Did I touch a nerve again? You just couldn't sleep all night thinking about me, could you? Maybe YOU should lighten up you little hypocrite... :-)

Oh, what's "ROTL"??? Maybe you meant Bryan is a TROL?

You still haven't answered my question Bryan. What makes your opinions any better than anyone else's? You're just an arrogant, ignorant, pompous ass.

Click! Click! Click!

ROTFLMAOWITAHAIPCNTSAOMFD!

Ray

... in response to You are such a phony!, posted by Ray on Jan 20, 2004

Attack, Atttack, Attack, LOL

... in response to Re: You agree with Bryan 100%?, posted by Ray on Jan 18, 2004

Ray,
 I didn't say I agreed with everything Johann said.  Of course I don't.  If it makes you feel any better when it comes to view points I typically agree with you HOWEVER the way you say things sure could use a bit of polish.  If that isn't true, then why is it you who has so much trouble with people here?   Nobody else gets caught up in near the number of fights that you do.  Just try to be a little less insulting and if you can't don't be surprised when somebody hits back.   Enough said.  I'm done with this.    Too much to do to sit here and argue the rest of the evening.   :)
   SteveG

... in response to Yes, I do, posted by SteveG on Jan 18, 2004

I'm sorry. You threw me off Steve with your 100% statement.

Bryan said “I agree with every point made in Johanns post”. Then you said “I agree with Bryan 100%”. To me, that meant that you also agreed with everything Johann posted. I guess I shouldn’t have assumed that since you are an engineer, 100% meant ‘completely’ :-)

I don’t have any trouble with most of the people here Steve. It’s just the hypocritical a-holes that I have a problem with (ROFL). I used to ignore insults from trolls like Dingo, but I changed my mind and decided to respond in kind. Why? Because I believe it’s my right, just as you have a right to ignore them when they attack you. The very people who call that arrogance are usually arrogant fools themselves. They just don’t see themselves as others do I guess. Oh well, to each his own.

As I have stated repeatedly many times, my opinions are no better or worse than anyone else’s here. Thank you for your opinions Steve.

Ray

... in response to I agree with Bryan 100%, posted by SteveG on Jan 18, 2004

the back bone to set RayS in his place. Bravo(clap clap)

... in response to MyMyMy Oh MY SteveG..I'm Shocked that Yo..., posted by greg on Jan 18, 2004

:P

... in response to MyMyMy Oh MY SteveG..I'm Shocked that Yo..., posted by greg on Jan 18, 2004

have a great day. Your Alrighty..:O)

... in response to I agree with Bryan 100%, posted by SteveG on Jan 18, 2004

n/t

... in response to Give it a rest buddy!, posted by Ray on Jan 18, 2004

You gotta be kiddin me Ray. You absolutely attacked Johanns premises by number with the general know it all attitude you have about anything that doesnt pertain to the nuts and bolts of the immigration process. People come here to get the information that you provide with great accuracy and willingness. I was helped by Ray Bacon over at mag-an-ak and can appreiciate what you do for the folks that are in the middle of this process. This doesnt make you any more of an authority on the international relationship than any of the rest of us. You are the one with the arrogant attitude when it comes to issues other than the immigration process. The post you made above is about the worst case of the pot calling the kettle black I have ever read on the internet.

I agree with every point made in Johanns post. My wife is upstairs taking care of our 3 month old and we are doing really good and its getting better every day. But I have to say that from the beginning It was the force of my will that made this happen. The things that have happened over the last couple of years damn near broke my spirit but now im glad i stuck to my guns and followed through. From getting on a plane days after 911 to car accidents trying to teach her how to drive, to pre nups, to expalaing myself over and over so she do dangerous things etc... She has accepted her dependency on me to get it done and she moves closer and closer to to being an equal partner everyday, for the love of god deliverin that baby was contribution to this relationship which I will never know and she is pulling straight As in school. But it was my persistance alone and her acceptance of that realtiy that got us to where we are today.

... in response to Why dont ya, posted by bryan on Jan 18, 2004

He had a different opinion and disagreed, that's all.  I don't agree with all of Johanns points either and I'd like to be able to say so without people like you calling it an attack.

Jim

... in response to Attacked?, posted by Jimbo on Jan 18, 2004

n/t

... in response to Same here Jimbo n/t, posted by Humabdos on Jan 18, 2004

uh oh, the ray, hum and jimbo click is being threatened. Nice thread on the Hawiain girl who was injured surfing, looks like folks are jumpin at the chance to participate in that classy discussion. In light of that you would have to be a hypocrite to question johanns opinion of a white women.

This isnt the first time ive come to this board and said to myself "that ray is an arrogant know it all". In fact if I stay away for a week I can gaurantee that when I come back i can find him pushing around newbies and people with language barriers.

... in response to The planet love power structure has spok..., posted by bryan on Jan 18, 2004

Tell me Bryan, why is it that you think you can come here to express YOUR opinions, which by the way I agree you have every right to do, but when Jimbo or Hum express THEIR opinions, you insult them by calling it a “click” (sic) and accuse them of being part of some “power structure”? Don’t THEY have the right to express THEIR ideas just as YOU do? What is it that makes YOUR opinions any better than THEIRS? Huh?

Now don’t you think that smacks of arrogance and hypocrisy??? Think about that Bryan and then take a good look at yourself in the mirror.

Personally, I think you’re nothing but a fake, but then that’s only MY opinion… (LOL)

Bye,

Ray

... in response to The planet love power structure has spok..., posted by bryan on Jan 18, 2004

Did your mama run out on you too? ;-)
Hum

... in response to Attacked?, posted by Jimbo on Jan 18, 2004

He ridiculed. Johann did his best to communicate his ideas and ray responded with huh and then made an arrogant statement about a 2 way street. It is obvious that a relationship is a 2 way street, I dont need rays insults, subtle as they are. Then when Johann tried to clarify his meaning ray attacked. Which is typical of ray, he sets you up to defend yourself and then blasts ya for doing what he does. I been readin this stuff for years

... in response to Re: Attacked?, posted by bryan on Jan 18, 2004

Now WHO is "attacking"?

The phrase "marriage is a two-way street" is an insult?

Bryan, you're nothing but a hypocrite and an idiot! ROFL!

Ray

... in response to Re: Attacked?, posted by bryan on Jan 18, 2004

'Huh' expresses a lack of understanding - I don't see ridicule.  The '2 way street' statement I agree with - I don't see arrogance.  The 'mumble' comment was in response to Johann's presumption of calling him 'irritated' and it was followed by a laugh - I don't see an insult.  I honestly think you guys are looking at this through your anti-Ray filters.

Johann says " -Do not expect your girl to study about you."  I disagree with this statement entirely; it actually sounds stupid to me but I'm not calling anyone that, just the statement.  Most Europeans and Americans know little about Filipinos or their culture.  When my wife came to America I spent a lot of time continuing to learn about her country and culture, watching her reactions to things and trying to help her understand the things that confused her here.  But I also taught her about American culture and urged her to consider the American attitudes and ways when she encountered difficulties in her daily interactions with people.  It seemed obviously neccessary to me because, after all, she's living *here* - she can't expect everyone to accomodate her Philippine social behaviors.  Without her doing some learning about me and my culture, those first critical couple of years  - when you're growing together in marriage and working toward a soulmate type of understanding in the relationship - would have been much more difficult.

Jim

... in response to Re: Any other advice?, posted by Dingo on Jan 17, 2004

Don't you have anything better to do with your life than to come here and start your stupid little flame wars? Go play your childish little game somewhere else you poor lost little man... :-)

Ray

... in response to Why are you such a pathetic little T R O..., posted by Ray on Jan 17, 2004

See Johann,
The Zebra Ray shows his stripes.
He doesn't respond to questions.
Then Attack, Attack, Attack,
Finally....go ahead Ray get the last word as usual, were waiting..........

Cheers
Dingo.

Forgot to say,
Welcome to the Board Johann,
Fresh insite and different experiences is just what
this board needed.

... in response to Re: Why are you such a pathetic little T..., posted by Dingo on Jan 18, 2004

"Attack, Attack, Attack..."?

Why do you embarrass yourself by coming here to attack others and start a fight and then whining like a little child if you can’t have the last word? You’re such a little dork… LOL!

Ray

... in response to You're such a cry-baby Dingo!, posted by Ray on Jan 18, 2004

Ray I'm not here to attack "others" just YOU. Also I'm here to
put your sorry stink hole in your place.
God forbid Johann or some other newbie should come here and
post on "RAY'S" board.  Hey that's a good idea you should
just start your own board "Planet-Ignorant" hosted by
Ray. You would be the only member and you can spout off on
any subject that you know nothing about.  Heck after a few
days you'd probably be arguing with yourself. ROTFLMAO !!!!

Don't be such a downer cow.

http://www.nodowners.org/gallery/downer6.jpg

Cheers.
Dingo

... in response to Re: You're such a cry-baby Ray!, posted by Dingo on Jan 19, 2004

On the contrary, you're only making an ass of yourself in puplic. Keep going, you're doing great! ROTGDFLMFAOTNTPIMP!

Ray

... in response to Re: You're such a cry-baby Dingo!, posted by Ray on Jan 19, 2004

Wow Ray you called me an Ass. How original. LOL

I can't wait until you get your message board up
www.planet-ignorant.com for Ray only.

Bwahhhh Haaa!!!!!

Attack, Attack, Attack !!!!!!

Cheers and Tears of laughter
Dingo

... in response to Re: Re: You're such a cry-baby Dingo!, posted by Dingo on Jan 19, 2004

You're just overwhelming us all with your pure wit! ROTGDFLMAOCUMFLQLATMSDTEIPL!

... in response to Brilliant!, posted by Ray on Jan 20, 2004

Ray don't be such a hot head. LOL

http://www.gamewyrd.com/pictures/angry.jpg

Cheers
Dingo

... in response to Brilliant!, posted by Ray on Jan 20, 2004

[This message has been edited by Dingo]

Come on Ray show everyone you ALWAYS have to have the
last word.
Go ahead check his other post where he fights with others.
He won't stop until he has the last word.

Sorry downer Cow Ray I think your brain is full of holes.
Bwaaaa Haaaaa!!!!!

I know Ray you love to, Attack, attack, Attack !!!!

Ray says:
"That’s EXACTLY why he (Dingo) is here, as he admits, to start fights and disrupt the board. He has made unprovoked personal attacks on several members in recent weeks, including petty insulting comments directed at another member’s wife."

Uh, Ray you're imagining things again. I never "admited to "Starting" fights with anybody. I'm just "responding" in kind to YOUR attacks.

Seems you're the only one who is continually involved with agruments with other board members.
No need to start making out right LIES now Ray.

The only "disruption" I've done is to your Feeble Ego.

Ray's reply to Johann's post:
"In fact, I really don't have any idea what you are mumbling about. LOL!"

Ray's reply to Greg, again, when he doesn't agree with someone this is what you get from Ray:
"Another little opportunistic TROLL! n/t"

Ray's reply to Bryan's recent post:
"Personally, I think you’re nothing but a fake, but then that’s only MY opinion"

I could go on and on with other posts Ray has made insulting other
people who don't agree with him but I don't think I would be telling anybody anything
they didn't know already.

Cheers
Dingo