Crossing the Line??

[CartagenaPapito]

... in response to i think your perspective is kind of skew..., posted by Dr Aaron on Dec 23, 2004

Thanks for the laughs "Doctor"   Too funny!
Can I get off the couch yet??
And I quote "she probably requested a pair of sandals, shirt, and shorts OR pants; maybe even a pair of shoes. Lets not forget the previously mentioned bathing suit. Last time I looked, sandals, shirt, shorts, pants, shoes and a bathing pretty much defines a summer wardrobe. I guess the fact you forgot to mention sunglasses, doesn't constitute a full wardrobe. HA HA
I have invited girls about 12  girls over the course of the last several years that I never met in person to meet me in different locals and this was the first one to pony up like this for the extras.
Girls that were a lot poorer then her never asked for a dime.
In March July and also September I invited both many diferent girls that met me in Cartagena and Cali and save for the plane ticket or bus tickets (in the case of Cali) never asked me for a penny.  Good Girls just dont do that fella.
I have have invited girls before from Cali, Bogota, Barranquilla, Medellin, Neiva, and Bucaramanga. I never had a bad time with any of them and money was never a issue. No one ever had the mental anquish that you described in your tirade. Relax "doctor", life is cool when you dont sweat the small stuff
I already had my plans made to Cartagena before I met her. In fact it was one of the first things we discussed online when we started chatting. After we "hit it off" so to speak, she told me that she wished she could join me in Cartagena so I invited her.
You should try enjoying the company of Colombianas before you make a claim like "your invitation was outrageous, given the fact that you two never met in person" Oh really?  Well speak for yourself fella. I had a blast with the Colombianas I invited over the last year. The same can be said for the Peuvianas I met and invited to Lima/Miraflores in Mayo. None of the women that I met felt insulted ot slighted etc. The girls that I invited and met I am still good friends with and talk and chat with them often. The only ones that were upset with me were the ones that I was chatting with but never invited them to come meet me. Maybe you need to work on your approach fella because speaking from my experience, the South American ladies love to travel and meet a nice guy in a romantic setting. Try it sometime before you you get your shorts in a knot.
Let me teach you something "doctor" so listen close. GOOD GIRLS dont ask for a dime, not a penny. I once had a girl come and in and see me that had her close in a big plastic bag. Never asked me for a dime.
Save the lectures for the guys at the muffler shop where you work.
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

[Heat]

... in response to Re: i think your perspective is kind of ..., posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

What kind of girls meet a strange gringo in a far away city?

HUm...........

[nealt]

... in response to When you say girls we wonder what kind o..., posted by Heat on Dec 24, 2004

A horny one

[Dr Aaron]

... in response to Re: i think your perspective is kind of ..., posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

you asked for opinions, so i posted mine. being a doctor doesn't have anything to do with it. i guess i should change my handle.

well, in your reply you mentioned that inviting girls this way is a regular thing for you. well, for me, it would be kind of risky spending that kind of money on people that i never met before. i'm more cautious about spending my money.

go in peace.

[utopiacowboy]

... in response to i'm sorry if i offended you. i didn't me..., posted by Dr Aaron on Dec 23, 2004

Good advice, Doc. You should never spend a dime on a chick unless you're guaranteed she's going to put out. In fact you should always make sure exactly what she's going to do for you. There are two gringo millionaires in Medellin right now who can't get laid - can I tell them where you can find such women?

[CartagenaPapito]

... in response to i'm sorry if i offended you. i didn't me..., posted by Dr Aaron on Dec 23, 2004

"doctor" make no mistake about it. I do appreciate a man like you that takes his beating like a man. Its the MIDAS TOUCH!!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

[Heat]

... in response to Re: i'm sorry if i offended you. i didn'..., posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

We know what kiind of "girls" you're inviting.

[slojas1]

... in response to Crossing the Line??, posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

That was a good experience to post, especially for the newbies. Hell, you see some of the old guys falling for the same crap.
If you have not met the girl, don't send her money! Simple end of discussion.
Great call CP!

[valuedcustomer]

... in response to Crossing the Line??, posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

I guess you will have to change your name now.

[Onephd]

... in response to Crossing the Line??, posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

This is more of a general post and not directed so much at Cartagentpapito.  Please don't take this as a slam.  Its just a thought about red flags in general and I am using some of your comments as examples.

First I agree with you and the others that "Generally" you should not meet a woman in a city that is not her own and send them cash or anything until you meet and build a relationship.

However two of the three red flags as you put it "could" each be "acceptable" in "seperate" cases.  

I wouldn't be too surpised if a woman did not have a bathing suit.  Remember this is Bogota.  At 75 degrees, these people have knit caps on and scarves around their faces like they are in 20 below temperature.  Agree, most women should have at least one, but hell I didn't havea  a pair of swim trunks until I went to Cartagena as swimming is not my thing.  So there is no absolute.  

As for the cabfare to the airport.  Yeah true its somewhat suspect if she "asks" for cab fare, but then again.  Bogota is very big and when you consider the traffic, cab fare there could run AS high as $10-15.  True most cases cab fare would be more like $5-10.  But then again if she is poor and trust there are some very poor people in Bogota depite it being a major city, then 10-15 can be expensive.

The new wardrobe thing is the a clear cut red flag.  

My only point is that each man must decided how far he should go.  

Finally, one only thing....If you offer to buy a ticket and such then don't be surprised if a woman asks for help with other things.  Thats not a slam or anything, but maybe that gesture sent the wrong message to the girl.
Everyone here knows that people in Russian, Colombia etc, thinks that all North Americans have boat loads of money.

IN all I think you made the right move but I just want to point out that there are very few clear cut "red flags".  Each man has his limits as to what he will and will not do.  EAch man has to determine what makes him feel uncomfortable.  I think it was good you absorbed everything and looked at the package rather than make a move on the first thing that you thought was weird.  So in all, I am saying it a good thing the way you hanled it but i just wanted to comment about the whole being greater than the sum of the individual parts.

Again this was not a slam but in fact an Atta boy to Cartagenapapito.  

 

[Jamie]

... in response to .One word, posted by Onephd on Dec 23, 2004

I agree the first two items are not red flags. It is not unusual for many of these women not to have any spending money so even taxi money is hard to come by. Many women probably have a bathing suit but many probably don’t like what they have. It could be old or out dated and they would feel uncomfortable going to a good hotel and being compared to other women who have the money for good looking fitted bathing suits. Most Colombians do not have free access to swimming pools and don’t hit the water as much as we would in a hot climate. Even in hot Barranquilla many women have told us that they do not have bathing suits to join their date at the pool or a weekend in Cartagena. As for wanting summer clothing what woman does not want to have suitable clothing? It is very likely living in Bogotá that she would not have proper clothing for Cartagena. It’s not like they are American women with a closet full of clothes and shoes for all events. Almost all of their clothing would fit in one of your dresser drawers.
Jamie
Engage the Exotic – Latin Women
http://International-Introductions.com  

[doombug]

... in response to Crossing the Line??, posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

More red flags in that post than a Tian An Men square parade.  

Another reason why I'd never, never, ever, never contemplate pursuing anyone 25 years or younger.

The mix of young hottie, materialism, and sugar daddy is highly toxic.

Lots of folks dig that kind of stuff, though.

[Heat]

... in response to Crossing the Line??, posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

Are you living in the real world?  Only one kind of girl will meet a gringo who she has never met before in a vacation spot.  A bad girl.  You trash her but your asked for it.  What is wrong with you?  Wake up dude!
Stop dreaming and wasting our time!

[jediknight]

... in response to Crossing the Line??, posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

it's a good thing that you were able to notice the signs soon enough and react accordingly before wasting valuable time and money. on a personal note, how disappointed are you? was she great up until she got greedy? how did you initiate contact? was it through an agency, website?
jediknight

[papi]

... in response to Crossing the Line??, posted by CartagenaPapito on Dec 23, 2004

I would not invite a woman to fly to meet me if I had not met her.  So had it been me, I would have flown to Bogota but had backup plans like you mentioned in the event things didn't work. Secondly, she's asked you for taxi, tickets, bikini's and a summer wardrobe having not even met you - what a joke!  However, I'm not even sure she would have made it to CTG and was probably just going to pocket the travel money.  Your only hope is to go to Bogota but hold tight on to your wallet and have a backup plan.  But you are probably better off moving on