A conversation with the soon to be ex....

[soltero]

I just got through talking to my ex as I wanted to let her know that I was waving a peace flag and just wanted an uncontested divorce instead of going through anything lenghty. She agreed, and hopefully we will be out of this soon. My question is this because I think she thinks I am the dumbest person alive or she still hasn't learned to lie properly yet, but she said that she has talked to immigration, and they have already approved her residency. She hasn't even had her interview for her greencard yet, and I would think that I would have had to be there for that. She is a horrible liar, but she sticks to her stories so well, that she almost can make you think the sky is orange even though you are looking right at it. I am 99% certain that she is just saying that because she thought it would get to me, but when dealing with the government, anything is possible. How true can that be?

[utopiacowboy]

... in response to A conversation with the soon to be ex......, posted by soltero on Dec 5, 2004

Mentira! If she is adjusting her status, she cannot get that approved without an interview, an interview at which you would normally be present as her US citizen spouse. Of course our immigration laws mean little or nothing to most Colombians so it wouldn't surprise me if she just goes illegal.

[Kiltboy1]

... in response to A conversation with the soon to be ex......, posted by soltero on Dec 5, 2004

Well the good news is that since you wrote to withdraw your affidavit of support, you will most likely not need to worry about her coming back and making a claim for goverment support, not likely , but it is possible she could get goverment support

Bad news, She is here Brother, it really does not matter if you were married 2 years or 2 days . once she steps foot on our siol with a visa, she has many options to stay and it would take an felony act to really get immigration to start deportation procedures. it is possible she is correct on all she says as it is up to the discretion of the interviewing officer to decide if she can stay or even needs interview more, and you will not be notified either way.

I am not a lawyer, but this is how it has been explained to me by both Immmigraqtion and gary bala who did all my visa work.

We have the toughest Immigration laws in the world just about to get into our country, but to kick someone out, well we are one of the worst.

good luck

[Ken2]

... in response to A conversation with the soon to be ex......, posted by soltero on Dec 5, 2004

So you were not even married for 2 years?  Curious where she was from and how old she is & why she (or you) want to get divorced.  Usually I wouldnt meddle, but Im looking at getting a fiance Visa for a gal after having gotten an Annulment en 2004.  Im really reluctant no matter how good I feel about the gal and the compatibility we have.

Ken

[soltero]

... in response to Re: A conversation with the soon to be e..., posted by Ken2 on Dec 6, 2004

Yes, we have been married for 2 years, but 10 months of that was spent waiting for her to get here on the K-3. She is from Honduras and she is 26 years old now. I wanted to get this annulled as well, but now I am at the point where I just want it to be over so I can move on. As far as why we want the divorce, that's simple, she had what she wanted out of our marriage the minute she made it through customs. Was your annullment from someone you met through this process or an American?

[Ken2]

... in response to Re: Re: A conversation with the soon to ..., posted by soltero on Dec 6, 2004

Well,  I married a Calena and she went thru a culture shock and I graciously sent her to live with Family in Virginia for a month after two weeks with me.  When she returned we plan to move to the city from a rural area.  she flipped when I rented an apartment not to her suiting.  I had only been employed a year after grad school on a budget.  She split to live with  her family.  She refused to sign divorcee papers so I secured an Anullment.  She asked to come back 8 months later when I purchased a house a earned a few promotions at work.  I told her Hell NO!  She returned home with the sister and nephew when the economy went South in 2002.  I am looking at hooking up with a BQ gal.  Well see.

Ken

[kented]

... in response to Re: Re: A conversation with the soon to ..., posted by soltero on Dec 6, 2004

Mine was a divorce from a Caleña.  I met her in Cali in December 2000, was engaged within ten days and spend most of 2001 getting her here.  She had a tourist visa so she came here twice and I had enough red flags that I shoudl have stopped before she got her K1.

She arrived in August, we married in September and by early December there was no hope.  She an incredible sense of entitlement (I guess this was gleaned through her Colombian friends in the US who told her she had me by the huevos) and an inability to see anyone's viewpoint besides her own.  

So she decided to fight for more rather that accept $5000 and she got NADA.  Believe me, I suffered horribly during 2002 and didn't get back to normal level of self-confidence and optimism until I decided my next move (move o Costa Rica for a year).  

Life gets better as soon as it's over.

[kented]

... in response to Re: A conversation with the soon to be e..., posted by Ken2 on Dec 6, 2004

I was married four months before I initiated divorce proceedings.  My wife wanted everything her way and wouldn't compromise on anything.  When we compromised on  anything, I would do my part and then she's change her mind about what she agreed to do.

She didn't exactly trick me into marrying her;  I just made a huge mistake.  I married someone I didn't know and was in a win-lose situation.  She'd win and I'd lose or we wouldn't be happy.  

I figured out what I had done wrong and tried to do better.  I moved to Costa Rica in 2003 and eventually got married.  I lived with my wife for four months and have some concrete reasons I feel that this relationship will work.  

My wife listens top me, compromises, never lies or even distorts and we definately can talk.  I treated my wife like my ex-wife (expecting her to be like her) until I was finally convinced.  I understand your dilema but you need to get to know your current novia well enough to understand if its the same thing as the annulment or different.

[kented]

... in response to A conversation with the soon to be ex......, posted by soltero on Dec 5, 2004

My ex Colombian wife chose to have a fight demanding lots of money.  She turned down a $5000 payment and three months later the court gave her nothing.  

I would have rather paid the money than had that much stress but in the end she stuck it to herself with her own greed.  

Your wife's immigration status has nothing to do with the divorce.  If she wants to talk about it let her but you'll be better off just focusing on the divorce.  Tell her your happy that her residency has been approved and move on.

Sincerely hope your divorce resolved peacefully.

[soltero]

... in response to Re: A conversation with the soon to be e..., posted by kented on Dec 5, 2004

" Tell her your happy that her residency has been approved and move on."

That's exactly what I did and what I plan on doing. I was just curious as to whether or not it was a lie, and I am pretty sure it is. I cancelled her paperwork with imigration two months ago. Maybe she was able to go through them in some way to continue, but if so, the system is more than a joke.