The Real Fountain of Youth!

[CaliBound]

Relax. I am not talking about the rejuvenating, tonic spring that in 1513 Juan Ponce De Leon thought he was going to find in St Augustine, Florida.

I am talking about Cali and its beautiful ladies. This is where you are going to find the real Fountain of Youth!

The minute I arrive in Cali, I feel 20 years younger and the same will happen to you when ladies that are 20 to 30 years younger than you don't mind being your "novia". And you know that when we were young, we made many mistakes choosing our partners. That's why many of us end up married to ladies that are 20 years younger than us. I do not see a problem with being married to a younger woman, if you decided to stay in Colombia because this is quite common down there.

But if you are planning to bring your "Sardinita" (young girl) to the good old USA, you are going to encounter some problems. Starting with your evil next door neighbor. He's going to be asking your young "Hottie" questions like "Was that your father?" or "What are you doing with that old man? Then, you put her in school to learn English and 30 students ask her the same questions after seing you dropping her off at school. Some of them will ask the questions when you are not around, others will do it right in front of you.

You can have your cake (Sardinita) and eat it too... if you live in Cali. If you bring her here, you might have some problems.

Soon, I will be going back to Cali and make some more youthful mistakes!

-- Frank --

[zack]

... in response to The Real Fountain of Youth!, posted by CaliBound on Jul 13, 2004

I agree with your comments.

Perhaps I am a little old-fashioned in my thinking, but if a woman truly loves a man, even if he is 20 years older than her, she will ignore the advances from other men. Bringing a younger hottie to the states shouldn't be a problem if she is truly in love.

Just my 2 cents

[fencer]

... in response to The Real Fountain of Youth!, posted by CaliBound on Jul 13, 2004

If you haven't heard of it, it is a very popular, hip, sex advice or sex counselling show for GenX'ers and younger. A typical caller is someone like a 13 year old girl calling up: "I'm 13. I've had lots of sex partners already.I haven't ever had an orgasm. What's wrong?" Or something like that.

I don't have a problem with it per se though I don't like the show,  especially as it reduces everything that used to be called romance or love or sex into medicalized sex talk. Let's just say it takes a *very* liberal attitude to all things sexual, the tender age of the caller (or the listener) be damned.

To describe one of the the hosts, Dr. Drew, has this weird habit of launching into a Spanish Inquisition on the caller. He'll interrupt the right away and start getting her to confess being a child sex abuse victim, or some such. It seems like on air bullying to me but the show must be popular. Whether she is a victim or not he usually wheedles a confession of some sort. Then again people go along to get along.

The show is relevant because it does seem a true reflection of our culture in certain areas.

So I'm flicking through the radio channels while driving and it's LoveLine and a caller is about to come on air and she starts describing her predicament:

"I'm a 23 year old having a relationship with a 43 year old..." Seemed innocent enough to me.

At which point Dr.Drew and his sidekick Adam Corrola erupt into denunciations - of her, she an abuse codependent. Of the guy he's a complete "a**hole".

At this point in the call the only thing the listener knows is there is a 20 year age gap.

Dr. Drew: "So you're being taken advantage of in this relationship aren't you? You don't *really* love him do  you".

caller:"Well, no.Well yes...I really like him sort of. He's really nice to ..."

Dr.Drew/Corrola: "this guy is such a pervert..."

(threats of violence, snickering from on-air guests etc, etc).

Well I guess the moral of this is some people don't like a 20 year age difference. Ergo our culture really detests it.

Borderline criminal it seems. What was so strange is like 23 isn't exactly child abuse. She could've graduated an ivy league; at least she could've been given the benefit of having a mind of her own. Maybe the relationship wasn't perfect, who knows she wasn't given a chance to explain. Who are they to judge or anybody else for that matter?

What is even more bizarre is this a radio show that countenances every bizarre form of sexuality from underage minors as a matter of course, sexual self-actualization in any form, just don't catch the drug-resistant gonorrhea. You'd expect a certain tolerance forthcoming, especially for something that is at least tolerated in most other cultures including our own in the past.

And in a culture that countenances every combination of relationship gender-wise, yet God forbid one person somewhere opts for a different relationship age-wise. Where does a society get off being so judgemental.

So even if you can resist the scorn yourself it may be difficult for your wife.

/rant

[Calipro]

... in response to (long rant)...I was listening to LoveLin..., posted by fencer on Jul 14, 2004

fencer,

Don't let others sway your opinions and don't worry about what others might think. Dare I say your life is about what YOU want.

Also don't buy into the talk about marrying women that aren't flashy and sexy so you don't have any chance of loosing them. With that line of reasoning we would all be marrying semi attractive women with a bad leg so they can't run away.  Don't compromise on what YOU want.

Remember, the success of a relationship isn't based on the longevity of the relationship but how much enjoyment you got from it while it lasted. Marry someone you really, really want to marry even if she is a knock out. Models need love to!!!

[gregas]

... in response to The Real Fountain of Youth!, posted by CaliBound on Jul 13, 2004

Agreed. Risky to bring a much younger Lady here. My knock out Ex AW Pinay was 28, myself 44. Both AWs and AMs made issues about our age differences, asking her if I was her Dad.

[Heat]

... in response to Excellent Post, posted by gregas on Jul 13, 2004

Did you have sex outside of marrage?  Yes you did!

[Fuzzyone]

... in response to Re: Excellent Post, posted by Heat on Jul 14, 2004

I do not think he posted trying to impress everyone by stating how long he
had sex or how many girls he got a hold of. There really is a difference but
then you would not know...

[Chris F]

... in response to The Real Fountain of Youth!, posted by CaliBound on Jul 13, 2004

Very good points that I really agree with 100% and have said before as well. If your 40 PLUS and have that 20 year old hottie Calena as a girlfriend, it is very very high risk to bring that "child wife" here to the United States. She will change. She is not an adult yet no matter "how mature" you percieve her to be. In that situation..your correct....your best bet is to move to Cali and marry or live with her there when you have HUGE age differences like this.

I am not against huge age differences if the Calena is older and she has matured (25 plus) but anything in the 18 -22 category (and you being 40 plus) and the odds are really against you for long term success with that here in the states.

Newbies here should really take notes on this one. If your 40 plus and your looking at that hot 20 year old Cali girl on the web site pics, realize she can be many things positive in your life....a wife here in the states is not one of them!!!!!!!!!

[Pete E]

... in response to Re: The Real Fountain of Youth!, posted by Chris F on Jul 13, 2004

I do know a guy 42 when he married a 21 year old and a guy 45 when he married a 23 year old that seem to be doing fine in the US.Both 3 years in ti it here.But these guys are good looking,don't seem old like others their age might.And both offer the wife a way above average lifestyle.
Its possible it will work if the relationship is good.I was 56 when I married a 33 year old.It didn't work,but might have with a different 33 year old.But if we were living in Colombia I think we would still be together.And I always got more respect,was treated better,when we were there.

Pete

[Chris F]

... in response to Well - - , posted by Pete E on Jul 13, 2004

Hey Pete!!!

It is nice to hear that a few couples are beating the odds in this situation. There will always be some who beat the odds in high risks situations.

But I think you would agree that these couples are very lucky. Like you ...I have been following this board as well as the gringo board for years and there have been plenty of stories of crash and burn situations with young Calenas and older gringos in the states.

It is high risk...a small few will succeed.....

[Pete E]

... in response to Re: Well  Pete...., posted by Chris F on Jul 13, 2004

And the rest will just go get another one.A little wiser perhaps,but not always.Its addictive.We are not going to get any woman like this in the states.
Cartoon,Frank and Ernst,Ernst is say "I know there are too many fish in the sea,but the last one took all my bait."

pete