does this sound right

[jonny]

I met a pen-pal 2 weeks ago from cebu and let her know that i will be in the philippines on january 15. She asked if i would stay with her in her familys home. We havent known each other long and this seems kind of strange to me and i have to say it makes me a little nervous. Is this uncommon? She says i need to be guarded for my safety from swindlers and call girls, any thoughts? Are the philippines really that dangerous or is she?

[Bear]

... in response to does this sound right, posted by jonny on Aug 13, 2001

I agree with the others.  It really depends on how well you know her and if she is the "one".  If you are going to see others or you are unsure then go for the hotel otherewise its no-problem.  I think you'll find the treatment quite a surprise.

Actually, if on occasion you want some private time with her, after the "chaperone" days are over, the hotel would be prefereable then too.  

Bear

[Dave H2O]

... in response to does this sound right, posted by jonny on Aug 13, 2001

Hi Jonny,

Maybe you should write a book. LOL You still have plenty of time to decide if you want to stay at this lady's house. If she becomes "The One" between now and then, you might want to. It is considered an honor and will save you the cost of a hotel room. You should offer to buy some of the food, which is cheap. I think that she probably considers you potential husband material and wants first dibs on you. ;o)) So...it is not uncommon, but a bit fast in the offering.

If you choose not to, use great tact in turning down her offer. You don't want to offend her or her family. Let her know that you appreciate the offer, but would not want to inconvience her or her family. As a sub-tropical Southern Kano (South Florida), I needed my aircon. My fiancee's family understood this, so I stayed at a hotel.

I don't think you will need protection from hookers and hoodlums. Just exercise common sense. You will certainly have more privacy and freedom to move about by staying in a hotel.

Good Luck!

Dave H.

[Stephen]

... in response to does this sound right, posted by jonny on Aug 13, 2001

Hello Johnny:

See how fast good things happen to you.

I believe that you're going to the Philippines to try and find a good wife.  This lady is interested in finding a good husband and wants to get to know you.  (aka "interview you").

I can see why you might rather stay in the hotel.  It allows you to keep your distance in case you find it's not a good match.

My advice is to stay in a hotel.  But go ahead and arrange to see this lady.  You never can tell how things will work out.  If it doesn't work out, you can more easily make an exit if you are staying at a hotel rather than her home.

Also...I would want to meet her parents if I were you.  That's important to see the family you may be marrying into.

By the way, I get the idea that you can get a decent and safe hotel room for around $20 in Cebu.

I've not been to Cebu, but I've heard great things about it.  Keep us informed.

Also, you can get good contacts through "One-and-Only".  These ladies have email addresses and are looking for a good man.

Best of luck.

Stephen & Tess

[jonny]

... in response to Re: does this sound right, posted by Stephen on Aug 13, 2001

Thanks for the advice to all. I have learned a lot from reading this forum and someday i will hopefully have advice for others. Ive decided to stay in a hotel but money will be slim so if anyone here could recommend a cheap safe hotel in mactan also cebu city.. much appreciated. jonny

[tomtneal]

... in response to Re: Re: does this sound right, posted by jonny on Aug 13, 2001

A nice place to stay is Eddies
tneal

[YourDreamWife]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: does this sound right, posted by tomtneal on Aug 14, 2001

Using the airconditioning angle is a good one. Also, lining up some visits with other girls in the area is prudent... If this one turns out to be The One, you can always move over to her place. Yes, it is a great honor, but once done it locks you in. To do otherwise, afterwards, would be a big embarassment for the girl... Malcolm