high rate of divorced women at agency.

[hombrecaliente]

Guys,

as I tag along all those sites of agencies (pfff...) I found this one:

http://www.latinbest.com/

I don't know if it's good or bad. But what stuck out was the high rate of young (indeed some were just 20!!)divorced women!!
I mean at that age I was still puking my guts out on a saturdaynight after drinking too much...LOL. (I don't do that anymore)

Question: is this normal in Colombia? Because only in DR (and Cuba) I saw also many divorced young women (with kids). In Peru and Brasil I noticed the divorce rates were much lower. HOW come?? Traditional values?? Divorce rights?? Whats up with this stuff?
Is this only to blaim the men?? Boozing,beating up the women,"machismo"....etc.etc.
Or do also the women have their part in those divorces??
In all stories I hear those men are having many women "on the side". But WHAT about the women??? I mean with WHAT kind of women those "macho-dudes" hit it off?? All unmarried young girls?? H**kers??? Or maybe also OTHER married latinas who are also unhappy in their marriages or wanting to "spice" up their s#xlife???
Comments please?!

I heard that it is as follows: I read that a divorce is quite simple (for Col. nationals)and that that is THE reason that if the marriage (for whatever reason)doesn't work out,people take the easy way out....A DIVORCE!

So how about it?? What says the more experienced guys here?

And whats more......is a allready divorced latina a higer "risk" then an unmarried/widowed one???
I am also divorced but I want to do everything that my next marriage will SUCCEED. I TRY not to even think on a divorce.

Suggestions?

HC.

[denvermike]

... in response to high rate of divorced women at agency., posted by hombrecaliente on Aug 26, 2002

Hi Guys,

I read your post so I thought I would add a comment.

As many of you know I live in Chile.  Chile has one if not the lowest divorce rates in Latin America. Why is this the case?  Before you begin to think about things like traditional values and the like, you must know that divorce is essentially illegal in Chile due to the influence of the Catholic church here. People do get divorced here but it is somewhat difficult and complicated.  The laws have some very strange loop holes that allow the civil divorce.  In Chile you have two ceremonies. One is the legal ceremony at city hall, and the other is the church ceremony. You can wiggle out of the civil obligation with a loop hole but never the church. I have met many ladies who are separated from their estranged husbands, some of them for many, many years. It can be too difficult and expensive for the average person to hire a lawyer and get out of a marriage.  So it may pay to understand the laws of a country before you can make any assumptions about the moral character of a culture.

mike

[Patrick]

... in response to Re: high rate of divorced women at agenc..., posted by denvermike on Aug 26, 2002

You should check out the divorce statistics page here.  It lists the divorce stats for each country and compares them to the USA rate per age category.

There are several countries with higher divorce rates than the US among the youngest age groups, but I also notice that the countries with the higher divorce rates tend to be those where many more women marry at a very young age.

Chile for example has 56.2% of the women in the 20-24 year old age group as single (i.e. never married) with a divorce rate for that age group of 1.3%.  Cuba, on the other hand, has only 26.5% of the ladies in that age group single, and a 12.5% divorce rate for them.

I'm going to call that more fuel for my "don't marry the young ones" argument.

I don't have it converted over to the new format, so it's currently not linked to any other pages, but the direct URL is-

http://www.planet-love.com/faq/maritalstatus/latin/

[hombrecaliente]

... in response to Re: Re: high rate of divorced women at a..., posted by Patrick on Aug 26, 2002

yes thanks Patrick.

But would a 22 yo too young for me?? (I am 35).
Given the fact that women at 28-32 want rapidly kids.
I first want to wait 5-7 years with a kid.

Anyway I also think I am young at heart and when it is going down the drain you can also fail a relationship with a 36 yo. (the one I dumped because she wanted kids NOW).

HC.

[Wayne1]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: high rate of divorced women ..., posted by hombrecaliente on Aug 26, 2002

Hombrecaliente

I am 38 and my wife is 23.  

It works perfect in our case.  We are equal partners and we run our business together.  There is no power struggles and it has been great from day one.

I treat her like an equal in every way.

If you want a young one, just choose one that has some work and life experience.  My wife was managing an engineering office, lived on her own, and did volunteer work with the catholic church.

I was not looking for such a young wife, but I found one who just fit right.

I think it is sub 22-23 that you get into real problems because they may or may not understand responsibilities at that point.

You have to find a girl who understand responsibilities.

Wayne

[Patrick]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: high rate of divorced women ..., posted by hombrecaliente on Aug 26, 2002

Who's too young for you is entirely up to your judgement.  I would just caution you to realize that although marriages between youg women and older men are more common in Latin America, it's going to be looked down on here, especially when the woman comes from a developing country.  I also believe that the tendency for young women to marry older men there may be simply because they value security more than love in some cases.  In a country where survival is more difficult, that may always be the case.

If you really prefer the company of people that young to your own age group and you keep yourself in great shape moving forward, then maybe you can be one of the guys who pulls it off.  Every failed marriage I've seen so far has been to women in their twenties (usually 25 and below).  Maybe that's just because almost all the women marrying are that age though.  No way to be sure.

[colman]

... in response to Re: high rate of divorced women at agenc..., posted by denvermike on Aug 26, 2002

Let me get this straight, the official church in Chile is the Catholic church right?  Does Chile respect freedom of religion? If their are potential couples that are of x religion besides Catholic or are bonafide atheist must they still go through a specific church wedding in order for that marriage to be deemed official?

[denvermike]

... in response to Re: Re: high rate of divorced women at a..., posted by colman on Aug 26, 2002

You are thinging like a North American. You can certainly be married in Chile without going to the church.  The civil ceremony is basically the signing of the marriage contract.  But in most social circles you are not considered really married until you are hitched in the church.

Chile has some very interesting marriage contracts.  There are several forms you can adopt. For example, pre-nuptial type agreements are very common here, where your assests are yours and her assests are hers even after marriage. It can be written right into the marriage contract.

[colman]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: high rate of divorced women ..., posted by denvermike on Aug 27, 2002

The pre-nup certainly is North American thinking but I think it can be a good idea. The problem would be either the male or female may take this as disrespect, and I would further say a pre-nup is best for couples who come from a wealthier family, although this certainly need not be a prerequisite.--Colman

[hombrecaliente]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: high rate of divorced women ..., posted by denvermike on Aug 27, 2002

Now that sounds pretty good to me!!!!
:-)

HC.

[Cali vet]

... in response to Re: high rate of divorced women at agenc..., posted by denvermike on Aug 26, 2002

What you describe seems to be the case in Colombia too. I was dating a calena for a while who was separated but no plata for the divorce. I think the gringo who marries her will have to pick up that tab.

[Michael B]

... in response to Re: Re: high rate of divorced women at a..., posted by Cali vet on Aug 26, 2002

Vet, have you been reading my mail?

[Cali vet]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: high rate of divorced women ..., posted by Michael B on Aug 26, 2002

Oh oh...did I touch on something familiar?

[Michael B]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: high rate of divorced wo..., posted by Cali vet on Aug 26, 2002

Let's just say that I'm VERY interested to know how many pesos these situations can cost.

[Cali vet]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: high rate of divorce..., posted by Michael B on Aug 26, 2002

In the case I refered to I think it was 200 dollars or so which is a lot for someone earning $140 a month. Of course if the lawyer learned a gringo was going to pay there would probobly be a "gringo surcharge" of a 100%. Seriously if I were in that situation I would try to get an independent to ascertain the cost rather than asking the girl for a figure.