... in response to Re: Re: Women in their 20's-Amen preach ..., posted by Kit on Mar 26, 2002Kit,
I think you're wrong about this one, mainly because I think you're asserting your opinions more than facts.
The truth is, in Latin America, there is less taboo for a man to marry a younger woman of about 15 years, than in the US. This was especially true 20 or more years ago. However, it is starting to change in the cities, where younger people are exposed to more North American influence, and see well educated and career oriented women marrying later in their 20s with guys closer in age (I'm not saying there's anything wrong with this either).
For example, I have a female friend who's Colombian, born and raised, and still there. She's 41. She married one man, and she is still married. She married a man 15 years older. When they married, he already had been married before, with two children who are not much younger than his current wife. Both of them have Ph.D.s, and are succesful even for American standards.
The woman, who's my friend, has an older brother of about 55. The brother was married 3 times. He is married to a woman that is in her 30s.
Also, as the reports say, the Manual "Sure Shot" M. who is the leader of the FARC, has a new girl. He is in his 70s and the girl is under 30.
However, I also know of a Colombian woman of about 28 who has a Colombian boy friend of 30. This girl is well educated and career oriented, and she says that she would never marry a guy 10 years older. But, when she made that statement, I and all the other Latinos who heard her were in amazement because we thought having such strong opinions without enough experience keeps a person from learning in life. This same girl said that she didn't like to cook, and she expected to either have a maid, or go out to eat 3 to 4 times a week once she is married.
So, ultimately it's about personal preferences.
Another thing about the divorce rate in Latin America. YES, it may be LESS OR EQUAL TO that of the US, but that's not to say that all couples are happily married. Unfortunately in Latin America, a good proportion of unhappily married couples stay in the marriage either because of economical necessity or religious pressure. This is another reason why there's alot of abuse and infidelity in marriages in Latin America, because couples who are not happy, are still pressured to stay married, but look for outside others to fulfill their needs.
Also, YES, the desire to live in a more stable society and marry a man with more economic stability is a major incentive for these women to marry North American or Western European men. But, don't women in general from all countries look for a man that can provide a decent home in a safe environment and economically stable? I think you, and I as well, are at odds with women who marry foreign men just for the green card and/or for money. That is nothing but deceitfulness, but don't look over the fact that some American women (not all) do the same kind of things.
Kit, I think you should consider being more open-minded, and realize that some of these marriages end with happy endings, and stop just considering them marriages of convenience. Have you dated a foreign woman, or even visited an marriage agency? What is your gender?
Bye,
Aaron
