come on give the new guy some advice

[Sparky]

I have decided 100% that I want a latin woman. First I am a construction electrician. A guy I work with is a Mexican. Alot of men on jobsites are mexican. He has made it a mission as well as his wifes to get me married. He is telling me there are lots of women looking to get married in mexico cause all the men are here working. I am going to Mexico this summer cause his wife wants to be married in the church there in mexico.
Ok this is were it comes in different than going to an agency. My picture is being sent around to the different ranches in the area(Zacatecas area). were the women are really traditional.
The people I am going with claim it will be a double wedding.(lol)
On the other hand I have been e-mailing with Edge. we live in the same area. been telling me about some columbian women. beutiful ones.
I find it easier to go to mexico maybe than columbia
Maybe I should write to both the mexican ladies and some columbian ladies and see what happens?
are columbian ladies and mexican ladies open to a blue collar worker as opposed to a white collar worker?

[Patrick]

... in response to come on give the new guy some advice, posted by Sparky on Mar 3, 2002

If you've got contacts in Mexico, I'd advise using them.  There's no better way to meet women than through mutual friends and aquaintances.

[Jeff S]

... in response to Re: come on give the new guy some advice, posted by Patrick on Mar 4, 2002

We did an informal survey over on the Asian board and only 25% or so of the married respondents met through an agency or address purchase, 25% met by accident when the person was in the foreign country, and about half (50%) were introduced by mutual friends. Count me in the last group too.
-- Jeff

[Jeff S]

... in response to come on give the new guy some advice, posted by Sparky on Mar 3, 2002

I have several friends from Zacatecas and it should be excellent hunting grounds for a wife. The people there are generally taller, more slender and have a attractiveness very unlike many of the shorter, stockier southern Mexico peoples I run across. There also aren't any major, cosmopolitan cities in the area, and probably your friend will be showing you around ranchitos (really teeny towns.) This means you should expect to meet "country girl" types who you'll have to teach almost all social graces to after she arrives. I know it's not right to generalize, but if you're looking for feminine, attractive woman who's also fiercy loyal, hard working, and who can hold up her end of the marital team, central Mexico is certainly one of the best places to look. As others have said, learn as much Spanish as you can, and practice on everyone you come across.

- Jeff S.

[Alteno]

... in response to Re: come on give the new guy some advice, posted by Jeff S on Mar 4, 2002

some rural areas of Zacatecas. The women are beautiful. I dated a hacendados daughter from Zacatecas who was going to ITESO in Guadalajara. She was a guerrita (natural blonde) and although it didn't work out, she had all the qualities most men on this board claim they are looking for.

My wife, for example, is a driven professional, being an administrator at a hospital. She is the kind of woman you would stay away from in the USA, as she probably would put you on the backburner in favor of her career. My wife is driven, yet she comes home every afternoon to cook a great meal. She loves to cook and I lavish her with compliments on it. She is fiercely loyal, very hardworking as women are in this area of Mexico. I would look nowhere else if this is what you want.

Use your 'in', I guarantee you will most likely have good results. When I was living in the USA, the boys at my favorite Mexican restaurant were always telling me the most beautiful women in Mexico (the world??) and the most loyal were from central Mexico. I didn't really believe it because I had formed my opinions of Mexican women from those that were in Oregon, mostly from southern states.

My opinions were way off (dead wrong) and now I see on a daily basis what those boys were talking about! Alteno

[FredFresno]

... in response to come on give the new guy some advice, posted by Sparky on Mar 3, 2002

If I were in your place, I’d see how the situation plays itself out with your co-worker’s social web before making plans for Colombia.  My own view is that the agencies can be a useful starting point, but that you’re always better off getting beyond them whenever possible.  Since you’re already "in" with someone from Zacatecas, you’ve got something that many on this board would kill for.  

On social and occupational status I’d agree with the other guys--partially.  Say you met a really nice lady who was plain looking and about 20 pounds overweight.  Then say you met a woman whose looks are on par with Cindy Crawford, Paulina Rubio, Pilar Montenegro, or whoever--and who has an ego to match.  Say fate forces you to choose to pursue one woman or the other; which one would you go for?  Is it a hard choice?  Most of us guys are very visual.  It causes us to make life choices that may not be fair to some women, but so it goes.  You should keep that in mind when asking about how women will respond to what you do for a living.  That having been said, I imagine that, for many women in rural central Mexico, a tradesman who’s a US citizen and established in his job and his community would be seen as a catch, and more so if he has buddies from her area.  

On comparing your friends’ acquaintances with pictures and stories coming from Colombian agencies, I’d say be careful.  I haven’t been to Cali, but I’ve been to Bogata and stayed in a boarding house near the embassy, and met women and heard plenty of stories about women emigrating to the US.  What I saw in Bogota was a lot of very good-looking women--many from Cali--waiting out visas to join guys in the US whom they barely know.  What I’ve heard on these forums and through the grapevine is a lot of stories about women who get up here and then go back to Colombia (those are the sincere ones for whom it didn’t work out), or maybe carry on affairs on the side until they get their green card and then split, or maybe disappear more quickly into the ranks of the "indocumentados".  I’m not saying that sincere marriages don’t come out of Colombia.  I’m still dating a Colombiana.  But I am saying that I wouldn’t pass up a trip to Zacatecas hosted by natives of the area and instead head to agency in Colombia--UNLESS I was more interested in meeting a lot of women here and now than in meeting the right woman for here on.

About writing women: I’ve done that, and it’s worked out okay for me.  But I’m still of the opinion that you can converse by email and telephone all you want, but you still don’t know the person until you meet face-to-face.  These days I would (if starting over) be inclined not to email women unless I had definite plans to travel to where she lives within the next several weeks.  

One other bit of obvious and unrequested advice--how’s your Spanish?  If you speak the language fluently--congratulations, you’re ahead of many of us.  If you're less than fluent, e.g., you can communicate with monolingual speakers on the job site, but you can’t completely follow a telenovela with closed caption turned off or your back to the TV, then I would be working on it (and I am, in fact).  Moreover, that example emphasized listening comprehension, whereas speaking well is more difficult and more important.

[Aaron]

... in response to come on give the new guy some advice, posted by Sparky on Mar 3, 2002

Sparky,

It doesn't matter blue collar or white collar. If I were you, I would write to Mejicanas and Colombianas, don't spend that much money on writing unless you come across someone you're really interested in. There are many different types of girls to meet from all walks of life, just as their are many kinds of guys searching.

However, pick a girl that you feel will appreciate your lifestyle and livelihood.

For example, I'm white collar, so I'm looking for a girl who would fit in well with professional dinner parties, long work related trips, etc. etc..

Prey that you don't get a ranch hand !!! Put in your requests right now, whatever they may be.

Aaron

[papa suave]

... in response to come on give the new guy some advice, posted by Sparky on Mar 3, 2002

Sparky,

As most other gringos with any experience will tell you, for the truly sincere latin woman, she will not care how much money you make or what you do for a living as long as it's a legitimate job. If a latina or any other woman is overly concerned with what you do for a living or how much money you make, a red flag is raised instantly. That is a textbook case of a "green card whore." That may sound a little harsh, but let's face it, none of us are looking to waste our time...a truly sincere woman, no matter where she's from is looking for a man who will treat her right and will love her unconditionally. The truth is, you are more apt to find such a woman in a Latin American country than in the US. If anyone disagrees with me please explain...my guess is, if you are reading or are a member of this forum you are equally tired of the AW Bull**** as I am. Bottom line Sparky, be proud of what you do, because your job is necessary. If a woman can't see that, to hell with her...

[Onephd]

... in response to Re: come on give the new guy some advice, posted by papa suave on Mar 3, 2002

Hey I dont'think it matters to any "good" woman, foreign or domestic, what you do for living as long as you can love the woman tenderly, faithfully, and enternally.  I have limited experience with Latina and Russian women, and I can tell you that the bottom line is they all appreciate the fact that you have a job and can be a provider to her and your children.  

That's not too much to ask in my opinion.  You'll find that there are men from all walks of life choosing this alternative for meeting a wife.  As a friend of mine put it, if a lady in Latin America is interested in you, she is interested because of the letter and photo you sent to her and not because of your resume!!!  

On where to look, I say look everywhere, Peru, Mexico  and Colombia.  There is no formula for success. I think you should to be open and just start contacting women initially.  You'll find differences across countries, but not big ones. The one thing that is common across countries is that 99% of the woman I  have met so far have been truly sweet and good people.

You may find that you are more interested in a more formally & highly eduated woman(i.e. masters degree and such), moreso than a less formally educated(technical or 4-year college)woman, and thus you may find it beneficial to look in places like Bogata Colombia or larger cities in Mexico as they will have a larger pool of ladies. If you find that you prefer the personalities of women that are more "traditional" in nature, you can search the smaller cities.  These are the things you discover along the way and only you can determine where you want to focus your efforts.

You'll learn a lot about yourself in this process I think.  Take you time and learn as much about this and the woman.

I will say that I have met a very sweet lady from Colombia that has relatives in my area. Knowing and being able to talk to her family members makes me a lot more confident about my future with this lady.  So going with your friends is a very good way to go I think.  With your friends introducing you to ladies, you know that the lady is 99.9% legitmate. With an agency, you're going to have to find this out for yourself. Of course just because you're friends know these ladies is not 100% guar. either,  but you get the idea.  

take care

[Red Clay]

... in response to Re: come on give the new guy some advice, posted by papa suave on Mar 3, 2002

If money/time are a problem in going to Colombia, try Mexico first. Actually trying letter-writing is also a good method, many guys on here met their wives this way. Takes longer but helps to weed-out the ones that are not sincere. Most of the players won't take the time/effort to write you for months before you meet.

  There are guys on here with Latin wives who are cops, mechanics, truck drivers, and ranchers. Sincere latinas won't care whether or not your profession is perceived as prestigious.
 
  Good luck-