moving forward

[young gun]

  i took mt first trip to cali in march of this year and stayed at norm"s agency.HAD A GREAT TIME I WAS SORRY TO HERE HE WAS SHUTTING DOWN. i meet a great girl and got engaged to her. but thing did not work out for a couple of reason. one i had look at the board a look over the reports of how beauiful the women are, but there is nothing like seeing it for your self. the lady i fell for was great but. an here is what i did not pick up on. and would advise guys to look for. she was a big part of the familys income with out her the money was going get really tight bad sign. how can a lady be happy with here new life knowing her family is suffing.also i do not speak spanish this made thing hard once came home but norm would translate 3 way calls for us 2 times a week.but then she lost here job an it was had for to contact her do to the late hours she was out looking for work.
that why i choose to end the engagement because there was know commication. we went a month without talking not go. i had did the paperwork for a k1 visa that just took for every the offices in the u.s are good the embassy in bogata take for every. to me commication is ket and you make stress to tese lady that the have to make a strong effort to talk with you once you return home buy email or letter. push email much better.i think the long wait took its toll her her because it did on me as well. the k1 is a pain i would advise guys to get married down there. alot of guy talk about getting to know
these but let look at this. you really don't know a women till you leave with her. plus on a 1 to 2 week vaction i feel you get to know a person but it is out side of your really life. there no work or or your life other little problem. that will be there when you come home
with your wife. how will your wife fit end and deal with you going to work every day and  she being stuck at home, what  does she do when ,she does not speak english how will she fill. taking a trip to cali 5 to 1o more time before getting married still can't answer that question. let be real we all are jumping in feet first.ask tough question get to know as well as you can but keep in mind you still will not know your lady till you live with her .to you guy who like to talk about how much money you make. when i was in cali i meet alot of pretty not one ask me what i did or how much money i made. these lady wanted a man that they could spend time an make a good home life. to you guys talking about your money i would asume you work 55 to 70 hours a week
not alot of time your wife. cali women need alot of attendtion more then money. yes they want a better life an if the man they marry can give it to them. i don't see anything wrong with it.

[Pete E]

... in response to moving forward, posted by young gun on Nov 22, 2001

If the woman you find is working,it is highly likely that she is contributing to the family income and it will be a financial negative if she leaves.Unless she is unemployed this is probably the case.If she is unemployed you could be relieving the family of financial burden.Many women not only hope to improve their standard of living but also help their family.Families are very close and like to help each other.This doesn't have to be a huge obligation.Many of these women only make $150-$300 a month and maybe one third of that goes to the family beyond their own expenses,so even $50-$100 a month sent to the family will help alot.If your finances are limited perhaps your wife will need to wait untill she can work to help her family more.It is highly likely you will be looking at this situation,so don't rule women out because of it,the next one will probably be the same.
As far as speaking english and keeping the relationship going,when you are face to face you can probably work out communication with the help of an electronic translater,even if neither of you speaks much of the others language.It gets much harder on the phone.Using a translater or translated E-mails will help,but you are probably going to have to keep going down there untill you bring her here to keep the relationship going.With only difficult phone calls it can die.You need to be motivated enough about the woman to do what you have to to keep the relatinship going.
On the other hand,if it does die maybe it was for the better.Perhaps this is a sign that neither one of you cared enough.

Pete