Hi,
Last night I was catching up my letter writing. A Peruvian lady had written to me from out of the blue (I have some ads running) and she had sent me a letter with a fairly detailed description of her likes and dislikes. Well, I wrote back to her to let her know that I was off to Bogota and to suggest that we might continue our dialogue if things
didn't work out with my lady in Bogota. Well, here's her reply:
"Sabes una cosa Sol, yo te escribi una carta amable presentandome y
recibo esta PORQUERIA a cambio, tu te criaste aca asi es que sabes
el tamaņo del insulto que me enviaste, sino te agrado barbaro, no me
escribas de vuelta, mejor quedate con la Colombiana, ellas son puņos
de hierro en guante de seda y cuando termine contigo seras su trapeador.
Pero te deseo una feliz boda, ella se la merece, TU NO."
For those of you who are Spanish-challenged she basically insulted me for responding to her nice letter (which was probably a form letter) with my brief I'm-not-starting-new-dialogues-this-week message. She said some pretty nasty things that I imagine most translation web sites won't recognize! She insulted me, insulted Colombianas, told me that my letter was a piece of cr*p and told me to never write to her again.
Anyway, my point is that I might not have seen this side of her so quickly if I didn't push her buttons. I suppose I might have made a trip to Peru to meet her and she might have been really nice and sweet to me ... UNTIL something ticked her off.
My experience has been that letter writing can help to quickly weed out a number of women. This woman wasn't interested in any competition, certainly not from a Colombian. Other women have gone away when I've shared certain aspects of my personal life that they weren't comfortable with. All in all, women have left for a number of reasons. But, I'm finding that within a month or two of letter writing I can weed out many of the ones who have serious emotional issues or are clearly incompatible. Of course that didn't do me a lot of good on my trip to Medellin; this lady really hid a number of unpleasant parts of her personality. But, even with that setback I'm willing to believe in the value of screening them out.
I don't trust that I could get an accurate read on a lady from the infatuation of meeting in an agency first. I imagine we're all on our best behavior in that setting whereas I believe that over time, through letter writing, most of us expose ourselves sufficiently.
One other thing, there's a huge interest in arm candy, great beauty, physical attraction and chemistry on this board. Am I the only one who believes that if I meet someone who's young enough to satisfy my desire for a younger lady (the lady in Bogota is 28) but not so young as to be immature, pretty enough that I can imagine wonderful lovemaking with her, but not so gorgeous that I have to compete to keep her (I'm decent looking at 37, not fat, I work out, and still have most of my hair!), and if she shares enough core interests with me that I don't need to be hit over the head with chemistry my first meeting with her? Am I the only one who believes that you can start with a shared desire for a life, home, family together with shared values, and even if she doesn't make me hot the moment I see her that I can fall in love with her? If I don't get an instant erection might she still be the one for me? Am I the only one who believes that love, trust, understanding are VITAL elements to a wonderful sex life and that I don't need to chase the models to find those elements?
Sol
