Question about income

[ROB]

I spent nearly a year off work for a very serious injury.  This year I've returned to work and I was wanting to know what is required income wise in bringing a girl home from the Phillipines.  Are you required to have made so much for so many years or is none of that required?  I've been talking to some really sweet women and I don't know what they expect of the man income wise.  Are they happy with a guy that has his own place to live and pays his bills on time or are they all wanting guys with huge wallets.  I'm a lot younger than most of the guys I hear about bringing home girls from the Phillipines, but it doesn't seem to mean much to the girls I write too.  

Any ideas?

[Zebson]

... in response to Question about income, posted by ROB on Mar 21, 2001

Rob, You seem to be asking two questions here. I believe the first one is related to the amount that is determined when you file a K1 visa to support your fiance or wife here in the US. I don't know the exact income level being determined now  for poverty level, but I remember once something like figures somewhere around 10-15,000 a year for support for a single fiance..kids are naturally additional amount.

But it was your other question that really interested me. I think most filipinas that have a simple value system and have the right motives in getting to know you won't look at your income level as a guage for wanting to be with you are not..the real question should be do they like or are they  capable/willing of loving you for who you are, not for how much you make a year, how big your house is, or your car and the amount of possesions you have. { On a side note: Most filipinas standard of living is way below the average American, in this sense I would recommend traveling to PI and really see what you are dealing with..even if it is just to say hi and by to your prospective pen pals..of what you are dealing with, this might save you amazing amounts of money later on, and in my personal opinion is worth it.I did it and I am glad I did.) Anyway, I think first she just might want to get a sense of how stable a person you are..etc.. Then I would consider telling her just exactly the way it is with you (Honesty goes a long way) don't try any pie in the sky, land of milk and honey stuff. Just hey this is who I am, this is what I do, this is my goals, ideal, dreams and this is what I belive in value wise, something to this effect. Your can always discuss financial things once you sense that you have a mutual trust, understanding and like or love developing with each other..I think in these areas it's best to treat a penpal or prospective mate as a friend and find out where there head is at value wise..what are their goals, dreams, ideals etc..also. Once you get all these things out on the floor look for consistency in the essence of this persons character also. Most importantly be real and frank and don't be a sucker..try to be wise and mindful that with just as many wonderful potential women in PI for mates, there are also those that are just looking for someone to milk for a free ride..Good luck.

Zebson

[jon]

... in response to Re: Question about income, posted by Zebson on Mar 21, 2001

I've seen tons of ads that use the phrase, "financially secure".  I often wonder why throw this into the mix.  Looking for money or love?

Jon

[SteveG]

... in response to Re: Re: Question about income, posted by jon on Mar 21, 2001

Jon,
 I think you are judging the words "Financially Secure"
by American standards.   You have to remember that the Philippines are like another world compared to here.  The economy is so bad there that many men are out of work and don't have any significant income at all.   In those type conditions many of these men turn to alcohol and become drunks which combined with no income makes them not the best candidate for starting a family.  This is not to say all men in the Philippines are like this for sure but this is the extreme that the ladies are usually talking about and trying to avoid.  

You have to admit, if a woman is going to be the more "traditional wife", stay at home and take care of the children, etc. then she has a right to desire a man she can trust to be financially stable and responsible.   I wouldn't let the request for financial stability in a ladies bio bother me.   If on the other hand, she directly asks you for money before you are engaged.....that would bother me!

                                  SteveG

[Dave H]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Question about income, posted by SteveG on Mar 22, 2001

Hi Jon,

I think Steve is right. We're talking food and shelter, and steady income type of financial security. If she starts asking about income, assets, house size, if you own a Mercedes, sending money for a $10,000 liver transplant for her pet iguana...well then that's...you get the picture. ;o)

One of the statements that I kept seeing was "God fearing." I was thinking of the fire and brimstone type of stuff. This may apply to the Iglesia Ni Cristo. But, the Catholic ladies were posting it too. Someone told me that it meant respect and belief in God.

Another thing that I would see in profiles was "single, children OK." Since I am divorced and have two kids, I figured that I would fit in this category. "Single" usually meant "never married." I was classified as divorced, even if the category wasn't listed.

Dave H.

[Jim H]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: Re: Question about income, posted by Dave H on Mar 22, 2001

Dave, good point,

This one fooled me too.  I was writing that I was single but had to quickly amend that to divorced in the second letters.

Also, yes, over and over I would see "God fearing" and the lady describing herself as "simple" - both of which are considered positive traits.

Jim

[Dave H]

... in response to You only live once! (single), posted by Jim H on Mar 22, 2001

"looking for a man who is "handsome." Remember, even us fat, bald, old and ugly guys are considered "gwapo" in the Philippines. ;o)

I also saw "a Filipina beauty," many times. I interpreted that to mean that she was proud to look Filipina (as opposed to western) and not just being conceited. Any thoughts on that one?

Dave "El Gwapo" H.

[SteveG]

... in response to And..., posted by Dave H on Mar 22, 2001

  ....got a typical Filipina brown skin not light or "morena".  You see in the Phils. we are not all equally brownned skin. There are different variations of  skin color, maybe it was the product of mixed marriages in the past by our grand grand parents that was passed thru the generation.  What we didn't know when we got here that almost all people that came from Phils. are identified as  brown race.
 ...also have a black hair (which all of us have), have the
Fil. height which is not too tall, with conservative outlook in life etc.. something like that.

                                   Melly(steveg's wife)

[Jim H]

... in response to Re: what  we mean by Filipina beauty......., posted by SteveG on Mar 22, 2001

Great explanation!  I was pondering Dave's question and decided that I'd ask Sally tonight, but you've got it covered!

Jim

[Dave H]

... in response to Re: what  we mean by Filipina beauty......., posted by SteveG on Mar 22, 2001

Hi Melly,

Sounds like my fiancee...perfect! ;o)  Now I know that she is a "Filipina beauty" too ;o)

Dave H.

[Jim H]

... in response to Thanks Melly!, posted by Dave H on Mar 22, 2001

nt

[Dave H]

... in response to Psychic MOB Network again - ROFL!! n/t, posted by Jim H on Mar 22, 2001

Oh Master Psychic, which lady is the one for me?

Master Psychic: "I am going to pick 1 vowel and 5 consonants...tell me if any of these ladies names contain one of these letters. The more the better. A-J-M-R-S-T. OK...maybe we should try that again." @;o)

"Swami" Dave H.

[kevin]

... in response to Re: Re: Question about income, posted by jon on Mar 21, 2001

The same principle applies domestically too.  Just look in the personals section of the Boston Globe.  Most of the gals advertising will want an FS (financially secure) guy.

The defininion of "financially secure" can mean different things to different people, especially between men and women.  For me, being financially secure means freedom from material debt, freedom from screeching creditors, and having a rainy day fund.  For a woman, the phrase "financially secure" will more often than not have a different meaning, and I'd probabably fail her test.  Financially secure can mean being able to have disposable income to not have to worry about spending it all after paying the mortgage on a three-bedroom house and driving in a "dignified automobile".

- Kevin