In Too Much of A Hurry

[Ray]

... in response to Decisions.., posted by Dave H on Mar 14, 2001

Dave,

It sounds like you have this thing all figured out. I think if you stick to your plan you shouldn't have any major problems at all. A good example of a guy who learned from his past mistakes! I wish you both luck and happiness.

Ray

[greg]

... in response to Re: The Truth Hurts!-DaveH, posted by greg on Mar 14, 2001

My own Horror story. I wrote countless Pen pals for over a year. I picked the "One". In 1999 made the mistake of traveling to Philippines to visit only one Pen pal(my first time traveling outside of USA). I stupidly got her pregnant; after filing for her Visa petition and she was approved she informed me that she's married(lengthy separated). Now, I'm stuck paying thousands of dollars(child support) to a Woman that cannot marry me. Of course I could simply forget about her and move on, but I'm not the kinda man to leave a child without a Father. During my search for Love and Happiness, I didn't have Planet Love, Mag-Anak or any other advice board available to me. I learned the hard way, my goal was to be married by end of 2000, so here I am still unmarried. It's educational for those searching for Love and Happiness abroad to hear the Horror stories, it can only help them to be more Careful. I doubt that I would ever bring a Woman here on a Visa, the risk is too great. I rather just visit her in her Country and maybe move there some day. People in America don't respect marriages or relationships, there's always someone trying to take your mate from you(destroy your home). We need to hear and speak the truth, no matter how hurtful it may sound to those with rosy covered glasses. The truth is the fact a Horror story can happen to anyone. No one can really tell about their Mahal being a good Woman(Gem) until they have actually spent years happily married and she got her green card, Citizenship and still with You. That's a successful marriage. greg

[humabdos]

... in response to The Truth Hurts!, posted by Dave H on Mar 14, 2001

Dave your right about women it doesn't matter where they are from its whats in their heart. However the all mighty USA green card will make even a good women to things she normaly wouldn't think of.  BTW I think you know what you are doing Dave I truely hope you are one of the lucky ones and wish the best for you !  Humabdos (')

[Dave H]

... in response to Re: The Truth Hurts!, posted by humabdos on Mar 14, 2001

Thanks Humabdos!

I still can't stop smiling, when I think about the judge rendering his final decision in your divorce. )) In the end you were victorious. You should be well prepared for the search for the new Mrs. Humabdos. ;o)

That "Green Card" is really something else. You are certainly correct about its power to influence people. My only previous dealings with Filipinas in the US, was with nurses. Most were recruited by local hospitals and came over on an employment Visa. Several came on K-1 Visas and married their American fiances. It is much easier for a nurse come to the US for employment and get a green card. I wonder if this would make nurses less of a risk for being "green card sharks?" I don't know the answer. Nurses have skills that are in demand throughout the world, including the US. Perhaps they would not be so desperate. My fiancee was considering nursing opportunities in the US, England, Saudi Arabia, and Kuwait before we met.

I tried to be very careful this time. But hey...I've been wrong many times before. Thank God for the distance between us. This time I'm thinking with the other head. ;o)

Dave "The One Headed Man" H.

[humabdos]

... in response to Re: The Truth, posted by Timee on Mar 14, 2001

Most of the people on this board won't belive it till it happends to them!  80% are GOLD diggers!! Yes there are good ones but they are few and far between! I have found its almost a waste of time to warn people of these green card sharks they are looking thru rose colored glasses! They all beleive they found a good one! and looking back on things so did I! I would have never gotten married if I hadn't have felt that way. All we can hope for is that some of these guys will see the red flags before its to late!  
Have I given up on finding a good filipina? NO WAY!  Will I be more careful next time YES WAY!   over and out!  Humabdos

[MikeR]

... in response to Re: The Truth, posted by Timee on Mar 14, 2001

Some of your statements are quite close to "racism"!   Please go on back to the Latin board..

[Tim]

... in response to Re: The Truth, posted by Timee on Mar 14, 2001

Sorry to hear your story. But I'd be curious to hear more facts behind it. Especially the correct name of this "page ___ something which displaces you" that you mentioned. If it is some kind of legal tactic being used by foreign women with fraudulent intentions, please share the details with all of us. You can really help some other unsuspecting guy by taking the time to enlighten us.

Thanks, Tim

[Timee]

... in response to More Facts, Please, posted by Tim on Mar 14, 2001

"How to get a visa to the United States" is the name of the book that you can pick up at your local library.  On a page ____ there is a statue or federal code that protects the woman against abuse.  The code is vague and pushed by immigration attornies and word of it is running through the Philippines as if Jesue Christ has come again.

In many cases the man does not need to be present or found guilty of a crime.  That affidavit of support means you are paying for 2 residencys.  If you are lucky she will run off with the next guy.  The new guy is not held to the same laws.  

I recomend to every one to get a pre-marriage agreement which stipulates and removes the page. Remember to speak to your immigration officials prior to bring a woman over.  The Philippines and Russian woman are the worst.

I know of a 60 year old man who married a 24 year old Philippino woman with children in the Phillipines. This man had lived in the Philippines for several years. This man came to home to the United States and went thourgh the 9 month process to get his wife here.  His wife arrived 3 months pregnat with someone else's child,  she pulled the page on him.  We (my philippino wife and I) sent for her,  thinking she was in trouble, we even called the police. I had to buy her two airline tickets,  she missed the first flight out,  wanted to spend the last night with her boyfriend. The police report came back that this man was frail and weak,  crime not possible.  After speaking with him he was just played for an old fool.  The only person hurt was this old man who place his trust and lifes savings into funding a dream that heartlessly cut him like dead weight.  

I remeber picking this one woman up at the airport who was being abused only to have her and my wife laugh about the stupid old American.  In general we are seen only as tools.

Let me point out,  there are many good Philippino's but hard to find.

The womans name is Ligia Soon Young she stayed, sold her baby to a Hawian couple for an apartment and CD player.

Immigrations will tell you who is doing what.  My wife was married when we married.  Immigrations told me that the marriage would not last.  We as people can see everyone but ourselves.  I should have stuck to my one rule,  one lie and I am gone.  I tried to be understanding to her circumstance.  Every persons in my wifes family who was female made it to the United States.  A church is the only introduction area I would consider.  

[humabdos]

... in response to Re: More Facts, Please, posted by Timee on Mar 16, 2001

Read up ! take off your rose colored glasses guys!

[Ray]

... in response to Re: The Truth, posted by Timee on Mar 14, 2001

I'm so glad I finally found the truth before it was too late.

ROTFLMAO!

[Cecil]

... in response to In Too Much of A Hurry, posted by outwest on Mar 10, 2001

Hi Outwest,

I am truly sorry for i know how much this must hurt.  I have had a similar experience so see if this sounds familar.  I meet a knock out beauty who is about 19 or 20 and just lives on the chat lines. After chatting a couple of times she overwhelms you with attention , constant emails, cards, etc.  She wants me to chat all the time with her but I don't have that much time.  So she meets another guy who will chat with her and the guy is new and knows less than squat about the Phils.  After two weeks of chat, he promises to visit her right away and basicly says he will marry her.  He gives her large amounts of $ to win her from you.  The naive girl writes you to inform you that now she is REALLY in love and I say to myself I am going to wait to pick up the debris from this disaster to come.  Now that the new guy has his girl he takes the time to learn more about the MOB process.  The girl has received dough from him before so she asks for some more.  He begins to think for the first time, she sure came on pretty strong to me, she is asking for more money, she is always on the chat line talking to guys....she must be one of those there green card sharks.  The bottom line is a month later she tells me that he went off to Jakarta and married a lady there without even saying goodbye.  Guess who would like to come back to me...hahaha fat chance.  The thing About me Outwest is that I am quite selfish.  I want my lady to be good looking but that isn't enough for me.  She must also be smart, god loving, hardworking, sweet, compassionate, and loyal to me as I am to her.  I won't settle for less!

Take Care,

Cecil(THE REAL MAN)

[outwest]

... in response to Re: In Too Much of A Hurry, posted by Cecil on Mar 11, 2001

yah,I know what you mean and thanks for the kind words
of encouragement, and the tthing is, this lady is dynamite
looking, kind, loving, smart, etc, 24, but, but , she is
in the fairy tale stage, and i am sure wanting to get out
of there, and the other guy basically just saw his opportunity, to swoop in and feed her a line of bull, knowing, that the only way she would leave me is if he basically proposed to her, hey, i am sure, she views me as
a maybe, and now he is a sure thing in her mind, anyway,
the whole thing i did not even know whe was talking to the
guy, and I told her that the most important thing to me
is faithfullness, and yes, even though we had not made an
official committment to each other, in person, we had made
a committment to each others hearts on the phone, to see how
things worked out in person when we did meet, without anyone else in the picture,, Well, anyway, its water under
the bridge, a lesson learned,,,,,,,,I wont put up with a cheater, and to me, that was cheating,

[humabdos]

... in response to In Too Much of A Hurry, posted by outwest on Mar 10, 2001

I've said it before I'll say it again 90% of MOB's are scamers! What happend to you is not uncommon! Most of these girls will marry anyone as long as they are still breathing!Sorry to say this but... its true.  Humabdos

[Tom]

... in response to Re: In Too Much of A Hurry, posted by humabdos on Mar 10, 2001

I think it is more like 90% are for real the other 10% or less are sharks
tneal

[Stephen]

... in response to Re: Re: In Too Much of A Hurry, posted by Tom on Mar 10, 2001

I sure am satisfied with the lady I married in December.

I'm sure there are gold-diggers.  But there are also MANY fine ladies that have pure and good intentions.  Even though I only visited one lady, I wrote to quite a few ladies that I thought would make the right man a very good wife.  

I also think that you get what you look for.

Stephen