new guy

[Gordon]

Hello to all !!! I've been reading current and archived posts for a few days now and decided it was time to join in. First I'd like to say that I am very impressed with your group as a whole. Nice people and some very sharp minds. I also want to complement Jack for doing such a good job with the site !!!
I started looking for a wife online last fall. I started my search at 100 miles out from where I live. Then 200..then 300 miles. I live on an Island off the coast near Seattle. I think I could have gone all the way to Florida and still have been looking at the same group of corpulent women. Only the hair styles seemed to change. Then I ran across a Russian dating site and the wheels began to turn. This could be a very good thing I thought. I was immediately sucked into the (false?) notion promoted by many sites that FSU women liked older men. I'm 49. I found the Absolute site and started writing
letters. Bingo! This is easy I thought as I instantly got hooked up with a very cute 26 year old that seemed to like me a lot. It was after about 10 mails that I got the invitation to send money to cover the cost of her e-mail. I did the math and realized she had spent almost all of her monthly salary on mailing me. Must be true love. I didn't think so, so I set up another account and downloaded a picture of Bob off another dating service. Bob sent Natasha a letter. Natasha liked Bob a lot too. Both Bob and I played with Natasha for about a week or so just to mess with her (him), you know, the Money Order is in the mail, that sort of thing and then I moved on I ran across the Anastasia site and like the mail concept there not to mention the good looking girls. I wont be able to travel to the FSU until
the fall of 2004 so I hadn't planned on writing anyone until next winter but I was weak and found myself writing to a very pretty 26 yr. old. There is a letter waiting for me but I can't get it cause Anastasia is having all kinds of problems with their site. We'll see what happens.
Anyway, here I am and my first questions to the group are. What is a realistic age difference and how do FSU women really feel about older men? I read Jack's intro to his dating site and I can see where he's coming from with problems generated by more than a 20 yr. difference but I have a family tradition to carry on. Both my Dad and my Dad's Dad divorced their wives of 30+ years and married women half their age and had very good marriages. I had the good sense not to get married until now and I'm being drawn to the same age group as they were. Must be something in our genes (jeans?). Any comments will be appreciated and my thanks to all in advance.
 

[ManOnTheStreet]

... in response to new guy, posted by Gordon on Jun 3, 2003

Russian women are no different from women anywhere else on the planet when it comes to selecting a mate. Your experience with age difference will be different than mine and everyone else on this board. How well you do in your own back yard should be a good indicator of how well you do in Russia's back yard. In Russia, I believe you will have a lot more to select from. At 49, if you can date one 26 yr. old American women chances are, you'll probably have a dozen or so 26 yr. old Russian women interested in you.  Best of luck.

[thesearch]

... in response to new guy, posted by Gordon on Jun 3, 2003

Welcome,

Age differences? Well, the bottom line in all this is many men would like a younger woman and the intensity of the desire increases the risk one is willing to take.

Plain and simple is that most women do not want a man any more than 12 years older than themselves. Yes, there are exceptions however, IMHO they are the exception. The problem is that these FSU babes will let you stretch the limits on this unless a younger guy with as much to offer is competing with you. They will even lie to you that the age difference is not an issue depending on how desperate or lonely they are and depending on how important the green card is. Not all of them are dishonest  - not at all --- and I do not have a clue as to percentages - you just don't want to marry one of those. Also, not being entirely honest is not considered wrong many times by these ladies. They have a word for it that was discussed about a year ago of which I have forgotten.

The bottom line is everyone is putting their goods on the table and seeing who they can attract relative to what goods they offer. I am talking about qualities that are superficial to being very real and important. These would be age, wealth, physical attractiveness, physical health, energy, intelligence, sensitivity, respectfulness, spirituality etc on and on and on. The more goods you have that are attractive to women or the woman being courted, the younger you can trade your goods in for. Of course love is a different thing that throws all the rules out. However, many of these marriages are based upon an exchange of goods and then the two find out if they can make a good relationship out of it.  

Bottom line is the younger you seek the greater the risk. The juggling act of all this can be challenging when trying to make your best choice. Good luck to  you.

[Richard]

... in response to Re: new guy, posted by thesearch on Jun 5, 2003

the Search says:

Plain and simple is that most women do not want a man any more than 12 years older than themselves.
Yes, there are exceptions however, IMHO they are the exception. The problem is that these FSU babes will
let you stretch the limits on this unless a younger guy with as much to offer is competing with you. They
will even lie to you that the age difference is not an issue depending on how desperate or lonely they are
and depending on how important the green card is. Not all of them are dishonest - not at all --- and I do
not have a clue as to percentages - you just don't want to marry one of those. Also, not being entirely
honest is not considered wrong many times by these ladies. They have a word for it that was discussed
about a year ago of which I have forgotten.

Richard says:

I remember the discussion about the russian terms for lieing well.  It must have been more that a year ago as they seem to have dropped out of the archives.  However, I evena couple of the posts to my hard drive:

Vranyo, or Âðàíüå (last letter e has two dots above), =1. Lying. 2. Lies,
There is another one, Vraki, Âðàêè 1. nonsense. 2. lies.

(sorry, the encoding seems to have been scrambled while on my disk.)

svyataia lozh', or if literally translated into English, saint lie

both posts have dates in mid november.  I am guessing November of 2001.

[tfcrew]

... in response to new guy, posted by Gordon on Jun 3, 2003

Post below under DanM was meant for Gordon... "the new guy"

[DanM]

... in response to new guy, posted by Gordon on Jun 3, 2003

First of all, this site belongs to Patrick and not Jack. Jack is a great contributor, but he is not the guy who set it up.

Second, I think a 23 age difference is a bit of a reach. Yes you could find an honest girl who will accept the difference now. But what about her feelings in 10 years when she is mid thirties and you are pushing 60. Besides guys looking for much younger women are probably the prime scam candidates for the crooks. It would probably be much safer and less of a reach to find a lady in her 30s or even early 40s. Yes a 15 year age difference is not too much for some ladies over 30.

If you really need a much younger girl, however, then you will have a lot more work in front of you. First you really have to be good at identifying scammers, because they will flock to you. Whether they be organized or just an oportunistic amatuer. Also you need to think long and hard about how you will make this girl happy. I am sure the age difference can work with the right people, but there are just more things that can go wrong. Recognize that and plan for it.

[tfcrew]

... in response to Re: new guy, posted by DanM on Jun 4, 2003

Maybe have viewed FirstDream ? (Jack's site)
I recommend a tour with such an agency.
St. Petes would be great in August.
Virgins/teenies are out of the question.
Good luck in your quest.
Karl

[tbirdjoy]

... in response to new guy, posted by Gordon on Jun 3, 2003

As far as the age goes I think somewhere in the 10 to 15 year age diffence is the best...on the average. My first Russian wife was 15 years younger and my fiance is 15 years younger.  The many friends I've had from my previous marriage who were married to women with a 25 year age diffence are all divorced now.  The ones with 15 years diffence are still together.  From my experience you really don't notice a 10 to 15 year diffence with these women.  They seem to be much more muture than the average AW.  If you get some hot little RW/UW 20 - 25 years younger than you showing great interest I'd tend to be a little suspect of her motives.  Just my humble opinion.

Mark