What is your take and your suggestions?

[WmGo]

... in response to perhaps , posted by thesearch on Nov 19, 2002

Yeah, I tell Him everyday that I am ready. He keeps saying "wait on me". I keep responding "But I am ready" and on and on

[MtMav]

... in response to Re: ....... have you, posted by WmGo on Nov 18, 2002

like "fence sitting" but it certainly IS a classic case of "cold feet" ......... 7 trips and no results? Might be time to "s__t or get off the pot."

[WmGo]

... in response to You're right. Certainly does not sound , posted by MtMav on Nov 19, 2002

[This message has been edited by WmGo]

That sounds like the mentality of someone who is desperate or foolish. I am neither.

FYI Most of my trips to Russia and Ukraine were on the same venture, not separate journeys. And I have interests there that extend far beyond merely looking for a bride.

Not that I owe you or anyone else an explanation ( I don't - I am my own chief), I will say that I have been considering making a long post on my observations and conclusions about the FSU and FSUW. I think that I am just about as knowledgeable as any man can be, particularly given the fact that I have established a lot of permanent friendships and contacts there (both natives and Westerners that reside there), I am a life long student of Russian and European history, and I track the news there on a daily basis. But I am a private person so I am still debating myself. If you search the archives you will discover that I have shared some of these experiences/conclusions a long time ago. Suffice it to say that it is very difficult to just go to another country, spend a few weeks and find your soulmate. I am convinced that without aid from the Upper Force it cannot happen. And please note that I didn't say "wife"; I said "soulmate". Yes, it is very easy to marry the wrong person, especially if someone is desperate or foolish. But it is quite a different thing to find one's "other half". I for one won't "settle". I just don't believe in it. I think it is selling oneself short - and being dishonest with the other party.

Life is short.

Eternity is forever.

WmGO

P.S. MtMav, what is your experience there? I am sorry but I am not familiar.

[JohnL]

... in response to Re: You're right. , posted by WmGo on Nov 19, 2002

Hey William
I wonder at times, if people really do have any clue as to the virtues of patience. I think not LOL ! You are so correct, why settle for anything with which you can NOT make, a moral, legal and binding contract with for life.

Your post reminded me of one RW who had this to say on her site........and from a Russian Woman, a REAL one ...

"God created some human being , breathed the soul into It , then divided it by two halves and threw them about different continents . Since both of these halves roam about the world seeking and calling each other. Unfortunately, one half of a soul does not always find the other one . In this case they both don ' t feel themselves happy in a full measure and a dim melancholy harasses them because of something unrealised . So it is very important that two halves of one soul could find each other . Then a person lives in a harmony with himself and with all the world .

This is why I am looking for that one and only man on the Earth  who we shall be happy together with . This is the reason why I have placed my ad at this agency".

And that came from a RW who knew the virtues of patience! PITY THEY WERENT ALL LIKE HER. She said  "...very important that ........"

I wonder what percentage of Men on this board have experienced what her, and the rest of us are not prepared to risk, for the sake of a few years of what *they* call 'bliss'?

Isnt it amazing how these same Men, would probably make a business contract involving the almighty $, and as soon as one or either party defaults, they are prepared to use every power and tool available to bring about conformity. Yet, when it comes to an even greater promise, one made previously to another person, and in writing, and one that they have previously acknowledged as the "One & Only",and which requires personal commitment & honesty; demonstrates to me that they have their priorities @.. up big time!

However, to those who have benefited from their past, I wish them the very best that life can bring and with their RW. Now that COULD be bliss!

I for one wont be puting one foot forward in a hurry, only to take ten steps backward just years down the road. If only Men would realize the economic and social burdens that their impatience has placed upon society, they might start thinking with the correct head.

Reminds me of the Parable of the sower .....
and bring forth fruit with patience!!!

Hey, see you down south, maybe mid next year WmGo. And, if you happeen to be tied up with other interests, I will understand. Like you, there are some priorities to attend to. I keep saying, the further I go down the road as a bachelor (in more ways than one), make the best of it, "Cause it ain't gonna last forever Mate" !!

Good luck to all
JohnL

[Watcher]

... in response to Re: You're right. , posted by WmGo on Nov 19, 2002

Thanks everyone for all of the impute. I have sent my full tax information as she asked for."WmGo" I would indeed be interested is a long post on some of your thoughts and experiences. I for one,  am getting somewhat tired of the "I got approved at last" type of posts. I think that many of us that "watch" this forum would like the thoughts and experiences of the more seasoned members.

[SteveM]

... in response to Re: Tax Returns Nyet, posted by WmGo on Nov 17, 2002

WlmGo,

As far being satisfied with a "promise", keep in mind that a common problem for RW is having the AM make, but not keep (and in reality not being any position to keep), those promises.  In addition, if someone reviews your tax returns and concludes there is a problem, perhaps it might be better to discuss it and figure out if there really is one before going through the rest of the K-1 process?

If all goes according to plan, the fiancee is going to have to sign a joint tax return in the near future, this cherished privacy will have to come to an end in any event.  Unless of course your wife is comfortable signing things without looking at them.

Steve M

[WmGo]

... in response to Re: Re: Tax Returns Nyet, posted by SteveM on Nov 18, 2002

[This message has been edited by WmGo]

Steve,

By "problem" I was referring to men who have large incomes. Some women, both foreign and domestic, only want a man for what he has. I try to avoid this type of woman.

My mom has signed the tax return prepared by my father for 42 years and never once looked over it. But then, their's is a different time, a different era...

Regards from the South.

WmGO

[SteveM]

... in response to Re:Tax Returns , posted by WmGo on Nov 18, 2002

Sorry,

Didn't think about this case.  The usual problem is the AM having less resources than he promises, not more.  On the other hand, if she is already interested in marrying you before she sees the tax returns, it will be a pleasant surprise.

I do agree (without personal experience, unfortunately) that having a very high income may pose a challenge, because there is definitely a "kid in the candy shop" reaction that hits upon coming to America.  In my case it was somewhat limited because my wife had already worked in Tokyo several times.

The only pointer I could offer is to spend the first few months doing as much education as possible about how to save money by not buying things on sight.  Once I got my wife well-versed in coupons, sales, Walmart, Home Depot, etc., she has turned out to be terrific in the not paying too much department.

Along the same lines, you can minimize the hit by doing somethings yourself.  Get dental work and vaccines done at a good private clinic in Russia before she comes over.  Do the visa filing yourself instead of paying a lawyer.  If you don't have kids in the picture, find good vacation deals ahead of time.

About clothes shopping, I can tell you nothing.  My wife's 50 percent of the closet is growing larger by the month; the only advise is to find her nice stores that are not too outrageously priced.

[Watcher]

... in response to Put Yourself in Her 'Shoes' . . ., posted by Dan on Nov 17, 2002

Dan ...Thanks.  I just meant that I would provide a normal enviroment to live and not a Beverly Hills type life.Could you please tell me where to find the document. Every time I try to do a search on this site I get an "Error message" that I am trying to search outside of the board.

Watcher

[don1]

... in response to Re: Put Yourself in Her 'Shoes' . . ., posted by Watcher on Nov 17, 2002

Watcher ,
I think this is what Dan was referring to . I think that it was originally written and posted by Del , and then reposted by request by Zink . It was a very well written post that explains some of those differences that you're talking about , well worth a read .

Dan , if I'm wrong , please feel free to correct me on this .

It's in the archives on page 192 , or here's the link to Zink's post :

http://www.planet-love.com/wwwboard/russian/archives/display.php?archive=000192&id=7831

don

[Dan]

... in response to Re: Re: Put Yourself in Her 'Shoes' . . ..., posted by don1 on Nov 17, 2002

http://www.planet-love.com/wwwboard/russian/archives/display.php?archive=000192&id=78316

Don - for some reason, your link missed the '6' at the end.

This first link is for the Russian version.

The following link is for the English version - so that you can understand and discuss what you have sent her --smile--.

http://www.planet-love.com/wwwboard/russian/archives/display.php?archive=000192&id=78315

And for the record - all credit goes to Del (from this board) for taking the time and effort to assemble this document.

- Dan

[rojak]

... in response to Re: Re: Put Yourself in Her 'Shoes' . . ..., posted by don1 on Nov 17, 2002

[This message has been edited by rojak]

I'm unable to access the post. I get:
"The date array was not set for index 7831 in archive data000192.php"

[davet]

... in response to What is your take and your suggestions?, posted by Watcher on Nov 17, 2002

When the lady goes for the interview in Moscow, she will need to know what you do for a living and what your income is.  This is a standard question for the embassy to ask to evaluate how close the couple is.  Sending her all the paper work now doesn't seem to be much of a problem so I don't see why you're hesitating.

Some of the Russian women's boards are quite pointed about some of the experiences that K-1 fiancees have had.  They love to exchange the details and linger on the "horror" stories.  The success stories usually don't get posted or aren't as interesting.  My wife reads the stories for hours, laughs and has a great time.

IMHO