Thank you for all the help

[terry]

I want  to say" Thank you"  to some of the men that post here. Over the past weeks , I have  read a lot of bad things here. However , there Has been a lot of good also. I think I had told on this board that for the past year and a half I have been writing a lady in Russia. But I did not feel that she was the one for me. I want to tell this story becasue I feel it will really help some. Oh, she told me yesterday that it has been over two years we have been writing to each other. I have learned that RW keep up with things like that.  she lives in moldova and teaches English at a University. Yes, she is allways on me about my grammer. I was writing to another Rw there and she was translating the letters for her. It did not work out with the other lady, so she worte me a letter. We started writing each other. She has her own computer at home so e-mailing each other was easy. We would write each other 4 or 5 times a day. She never ask me for anything.  After about 6 months of writing to each other, she ask me one day when I was going to come over and  meet her in person. I told her that i did not see anyreason to meet her in person because we were just freinds. well, she was very hurt over this. I stopped writing to her at that time. But she never stopped writing to me. She was nto writing every day now. But any holiday she would write me. she knew my mothers birthday, my birthday, my sons birthday and my brothers and sisiter's birthday. she would allways wirte and ask me to tell them happy birthday. I would allway wirte back and tell her thank you.  we started talking to each other again each day about a year ago.  In each letter she would allways tell me , she loved me. we talked a little about what had happen before. She ask me  if it would be ok to write me even if I did not think she was the one for
me.  we write each other every day. 5 , 6  7 times a day. I sent her the money to get a web cam. so now we get on pal talk and spend hours talking to each other. we can see each other and talk to each other.
 A few weeks ago on the post. someone said something about allways thinkng you can do better in finding a RW. I do not remember who said that. But it hit home with me. Mila is a very nice looking lady. she is 41 years old. I ask myself, if I was looking past the perfect wife for me because I am thinking I can do better. When you are looking at this ladies on the dating site's.  You see so many beautifu women that you may past over the one that was really right for you. A few days ago, we were on pal talk to gather and I looked at her and it hit, I could never give her up for someone else.  I have been  a food for not seeing the real Mila. she never gave up on me even when I told her that I did not feel she was the right one for me. She is very beautiful on the outside, but even more on the inside. Why did I not feel she was the right one? because she is 5 foot 5. I wanted some one a little taller because I am tall. silly me, Do we miss the women that we woudl really be happy with all becasue we are allways tryin go do better. I feel that is true in my case. today, I have to eat crow. I knwo thatwhen she gets in from teaching. the first thing she will do  i se-mail and tell me she is home. does this everyday. I am going to write her back and tell her how wrong I have been and that I really do love her. we know alot about each other.  I have even talked to her parents on pal talk with her. any time we are on line togather, her mother allways tells her to tell me hello.  I am going to see her now. she may kill me today after all this. I don't know.

Again, thank you  to the person that said that. it helped me know what I really wanted.
Terry

[thesearch]

... in response to Thank you for all the help, posted by terry on Mar 1, 2002

I remember those same words about thinking you can always do better. I think that simple indecision when there are so many options makes this a potential problem.

I enjoyed your post. Good luck

[Deckard]

... in response to Thank you for all the help, posted by terry on Mar 1, 2002

Terry,

It was really nice to ready your story. Your Mila is quite a woman from what you wrote. You sound like a really lucky guy. And when you wrote that she said she would have kept waiting on you until she died.... well I was moved. Go see her, and best of luck to you.

I still can't believe you almost passed her up because of her height, and 5 ft 5 inches at that! How could you??

My fiance is also 5 ft 5 inches. I'm rather tall at 6 ft 2 inches.

Maybe you just couldn't picture it in your head or something, I don't know. I don't know if you're any taller than me, but I can't imagine passing up someone because she's 7 inches shorter than me.

But of course, I know, to each his own. I'm just glad you came to your senses .

Tell you what, I'll e-mail you a couple of pictures of her and me together if you would like, and you can see that our height difference is nothing to balk about . I hope it'll make you feel better.

And a "bonus", when you go out with her one day, she'll probably wear high-heeled shoes, if she's anything like most of the women I saw in Ukraine. That height difference will be even less.

Let me know,

Peace,

-Deckard

P.S. Sorry Tim, I haven't forgotten about you, just practically swamped right now.

[terry]

... in response to A touching story, posted by Deckard on Mar 1, 2002

Thank You Deckard

 Yes, I really feel like I am very lucky.  I am 6"2 also. I was one of those that made a list of what I wanted.  One of the  things on the list was she would have to be no less that 5" 8.  I know I was a fool. Here is a lady that I talk to each day and we write each other many times a day. For two years we have done this.  We have talked about  things, that I have read here, that You just do not talk to a Russian women about before you meet in person. we know just about everything about each other. she knows my own life and I knows hers. we even write thur really mail. I have hundreds of pictures of her and she the same of me. She is 41, but looks more like she is in early 30's. We joke with each other all the time. One day, she came home from work and did not write me. she was feeling bad and layed down to rest. I wrote her and joking with her told her she was not to come in and not check in with me first. Now i was just joking with her.  When she wrote me back, she told she understood and I was right, she should check in before she did anything.  We can disagree on things and not get mad at each other.  I had told her about this forum, she does not like it. I know it is because she dose not understand it.  After reading that in the forum, I ask myself this question, could I give up such a wonderful women , was the feelings really there for her. yes they are.  I trust her to no end. I ask her one time if she wrote to other men? she told me  she did not want to write to other men.   I guess i am talking ot much. I knew I cared about her, now it is good to know  tht I really do love her. 5'5 is wonderful:)

[Natalya]

... in response to Re: A touching story, posted by terry on Mar 2, 2002

Height is the last problem you'd worry about.

[John K]

... in response to Terry, My hubby 6"2' and me 5"..., posted by Natalya on Mar 2, 2002

I can't remember which.  The height difference never bothered me...

[terry]

... in response to Thank you for all the help, posted by terry on Mar 1, 2002

Well, it looks like I am going to Moldova. we were on pal talk for over three hours. all is well. I learned a lot about RW today.  I feel i am real lucky. Mila is very open and talks to me about just about everything. it was interting to learn that I am the only america man she has ever wrote to about herself. She has worked with some agency in the past as an intrepeter. I ask her why she wrote me after it did not work out between the other lady and I. she told me, remember I read your letters to her.  Yes she is one happy lady. she is 7 hours ahead of me in time. but she did not want to stop talking. everthing is great now. I will start working monday on going to see her. we are so much alike , it is hard to understand, she told me she would have waited on me until she had died.  she knew it would happen some day.

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Re: ( update)Thank you for all the help, posted by terry on Mar 1, 2002

Guys... when you meet a woman like that...

Give up.

I mean.. just... give... up...

When a good woman decides you're it, and she'll wait until she dies before she gives in... just buy the dayum ring already... it's all over, and you just don't know it yet :-)

Good for you, Terry!

[terry]

... in response to Re: ( update)Thank you for all the help, posted by terry on Mar 1, 2002

Forgot, in telling her why I was wrong, I told her about this forum, she does not like forums she feel that it is a place wher men just talk about their wifes. one day next week. i am going to help her get in here if i can. she has some problem with her internet connetion and I don't know if someone from Russian can get to this forum. any ideas?  I was thinking about copy and paste it to an e-mail to her. will it work?

[rojak]

... in response to Re: Re: ( update)Thank you for all the h..., posted by terry on Mar 1, 2002

Terry, your posts are appreciated, but often intelligible. I don't know if it my browser or something else such as an electronic glitch, is causing this problem.  But it is a lot of work to decipher much of what you post here. Are you familiar with spellcheck and grammarcheck? If you can learn how to use them, your posts would take on considerably more credibility. Just a suggestion!
I wish you much success in your pursuit of happiness.

[Patrick]

... in response to Re: Re: Re: ( update)Thank you for all t..., posted by rojak on Mar 1, 2002

Rojak,

Your posts are appreciated, but please refrain from castigating others for grammatical and spelling errors until you yourself attain a higher level of diction and are capable of error-free discourse.  I find your message to be somewhat unintelligible and condescending, not to mention rife with error.  We're only human and nobody's perfect.

Anyone who can post without calling someone else names or insulting the whole board is okay in my book.  Whether they write well or not.

Patrick (who's currently posting with the help of a spell checker)

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Let he who is without grammatical error ..., posted by Patrick on Mar 1, 2002

Er... I mean write so good...

Ummm... I mean write so well...

Awww ... sheesh!

Lighten up on the guy, would you?

He's in love...

[BrianN]

... in response to Re: ( update)Thank you for all the help, posted by terry on Mar 1, 2002

How'd it go?  Is she still crying or did she kill you already?  Hope is well..

[terry]

... in response to Re: ( update)Thank you for all the help, posted by terry on Mar 1, 2002

letter is on the way to her, waiting for bomb to go off:)

[MarkInTx]

... in response to Re: ( update)Thank you for all the help, posted by terry on Mar 1, 2002


Just so you know...

I am 6'2". When I got divorced, it was a shock to me... but suddenly I started thinking: Wow, I can be with anyone right now. Time to find my dream woman.

And I started thinking... hmmm, my ex-wife was 5'4" ... wouldn't it be nice to have someone taller?

Sheesh the mind games we play!

The woman who I finally fell head over heels in love with was 5'2"!

And do you know what...? It got to the point where I couldn't imagine being with anyone taller. I loved the way she fit... and the way I could totally wrap her up in my arms.

When we finally broke up (after three years) I dated someone who was 5'11". No contest. I would have traded her for my 5'2" beauy any day.

So... I understand the height thing. But you are right... there are SO many things more important. We need to sometimes let go of our preconceived notions and just let love take us sometimes...