Long time no update!

[Crum1515]

Hey everybody.  Been a hectic last few months, met and talked with a few women, but only one seriously.  We talked for about a month and a half and I was beginning to plan to head over to the Philippines to meet her and she "came clean" and admitted that she was only 16... wow haha.  Lots of scammers and cam girls out there.  Think I need to start asking for ID up front haha.

[robert angel]

Sounds like you got lucky. Remember that convincing false IDs are common just about everywhere. Sounds like you have a conscience. Underage girls even use fake IDs there to get guys to have sex, then the
'authorities' come storming in. If they're lucky, they get off paying thousands of dollars in fines, the money sometimes shared with the girl and her cohorts.  If they're extremely unlucky, the guys rot in Philippine jails so awful that most rats would shun them.

[michaelb]

Lucky is when you're holding 16 against the dealer's 9 and you draw a 5.  What Crum did is called "dodged the bullet".

[Maverick]

Sounds like you got lucky. Remember that convincing false IDs are common just about everywhere. Sounds like you have a conscience. Underage girls even use fake IDs there to get guys to have sex, then the
'authorities' come storming in. If they're lucky, they get off paying thousands of dollars in fines, the money sometimes shared with the girl and her cohorts.  If they're extremely unlucky, the guys rot in Philippine jails so awful that most rats would shun them.

Any advice on how to avoid this? Lol


I'm planning on making my first trip this summer and I'd like to come home afterwards. 

[robert angel]

Any advice on how to avoid this? Lol


I'm planning on making my first trip this summer and I'd like to come home afterwards. 

Sounds like you got lucky. Remember that convincing false IDs are common just about everywhere. Sounds like you have a conscience. Underage girls even use fake IDs there to get guys to have sex, then the
'authorities' come storming in. If they're lucky, they get off paying thousands of dollars in fines, the money sometimes shared with the girl and her cohorts.  If they're extremely unlucky, the guys rot in Philippine jails so awful that most rats would shun them.

Due diligence. Hopefully you'll have become acquainted enough with whomever you're planning to see, to the point where between seeing them on cam and judging the veracity of their conversations, that you're quite certain they're 18 or older. A high school diploma typically means she's at least 16, which is still off limits. Sure it sounds too forward, perhaps even rude, but I'd want to see educational documents, govt. IDs and even a birth certificate, if I were the least bit wary.

Some people will go to great lengths and time to 'set the hook' to separate a guy from his money and if they can score thousands of dollars, in a nation where millions make less than a dollar a day, obviously the incentive can be quite high to be crafty and ingenious. False papers as said, are pretty available in most places, so to a degree you have to trust your eyes and gut instincts.  It's not easy either. My wife is well into her 30's and people still often assume she's in high school--she generally doesn't wear make up, dresses modestly and takes very good care of herself. (and me too)

Just another reason why I say it takes, time, time and more time. I wouldn't recommend four years to anyone, but for that long, I chatted with my now wife almost everyday as 'friends', each of us free to get involved with others, sharing our experiences, while I continually told myself "Too young, too pretty". Eventually I caved in and nobody who mattered to me, not my family, nor any friends had any reservations or concerns. That said, on my first marriage, my best friend refused to be in the wedding party because he felt my first wife wasn't right for me. He's right, I left--she's gone. If there seemed to be any flags, they would've been waved in my face by him and others--really the only people who's opinions might mean something to me.

“Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” — Bernard Baruch

[Crum1515]

All good info!  I am still cautious as ever, and now I have added this little experience to my list of possible cons that I keep an eye out for.

Just need to keep casting my net out until I catch an actual fish instead of these stinky boots.

[robert angel]

All good info!  I am still cautious as ever, and now I have added this little experience to my list of possible cons that I keep an eye out for.

Just need to keep casting my net out until I catch an actual fish instead of these stinky boots.

There was a thread a few years back titled "I'm totally amazed" about a personal friend of mine--a pretty sharp fellow actually, who's now happily married for a couple years to a nice Filipina. Anywho, he got taken for some fairly big money by a she who was actually a he. So besides looking at fish and boots, just like you look under the hood when you buy a car, you might want to look under the skirt before you commit to a 'woman'! Here's just one post--it was a scorching thread at the time...

The bait was a beautiful young woman. She had several tasteful pictures in modest surroundings, casually dressed. The profile was very tame with just the normal I'm looking for this and that with the prospect of marriage. There was nothing to raise any immediate flags. It started with an email and a quick introduction. Then came a quiet and reserved reply. There was none of the "lets get married I'm in a hurry" stuff. In fact it was just the opposite. It was lets go slow and really get to know one another.

We chatted, and over a month or two we became pretty close; close to the point that if we didn't chat I missed it, it was nothing big but I missed it. She was walking to the chat cafe everyday morning and evening to chat with me; going out of her way to make time available for us. I'm still on my guard here but I like this gal. Shes open, honest (so I thought), highly intelligent, and technologically up to speed. She has realistic goals and dreams. She knows that it will take time IF we decide that we're for one another.

Its probably three months now and shes never asked me for a cent. I wanted to help so after asking several times to pay for the chat time and being refused, I finally convinced her to let me
pay for one months chat time. I sent $50.00 because that is the smallest amount that I could send. She disappeared for two days and the alarms and bells went off. OK I sent money and she ran. At least it was only $50.00 right? Nope not the case.

The next evening shes on line waiting for me and she immediately starts a video chat. WTF!!! What is this with a webcam? Shes NEVER had one. The story is that she had almost enough money saved to buy a laptop and the $50.00 I sent was enough to put her over the top so she got it. She wasn't on line because she was waiting for the internet to be connected at home. All of this was totally believeable. Flags lowered, but here is where additional flags should have gone up. She never ever mentioned that she was saving for a laptop. Thinking back we talked about everything and she never said a word. Although this may again be part of her not asking for money. She never not one time ever asked for a cent. She may not have said anything thinking that it would seem like asking. I really have no idea. Regardless, I think the laptop should have been a flag. It may have been payday from the previous scam victim. Who knows.

We continue to talk and over the next 3 months or so I start to seriously like her. So I start asking about visiting and explaining that I want to come meet her. That's when the idea of her trying to get a visitors visa pops up. This should have been a flag. I'm ready to spend serious money on her and here comes the next part of the plan. Based on what I had read here I told her that it was a waste of time. That it wouldn't happen, couldn't happen. She wouldn't hear it. She went to work and over the next month she gathered all the documents. She showed me her tax ID, birth certificate, passport, work history, and scheduled an interview. FLAG TIME!!! Where is she getting the money for all of this? I should have looked into this and found out for myself specifically what would be required but I thought it was a moot point because there was NO WAY she was going to get the visa! I totally missed this one. NEVER EVER move ahead without knowing exactly exactly exactly what is required.

She had the interview and the wait was supposed to be two weeks to know something. I didn't even bat an eye. It could be two weeks or two years, it ain't happening. Two weeks went by and then part of the 3rd week and she was wired tight waiting for word one way or the other. I endured it because I KNEW she was going to be disappointed. Then the day came!!! I GOT IT I GOT THE VISA!!! That is the day I started this thread.

I asked when she wanted to come here. I was just a stoked as she is now!!! This can't be happening. I was stoked to the point that I totally let down what was left of any guard that I had up. You all tried to rein me in but I wouldn't have anything to do with your nay saying. YOU WEREN'T THERE!!! You didn't see the hard work she went through, you hadn't talked to her for 8 months, NONE OF YOU knew what was really going on here!!!! Well I guess you did, but by that time I wasn't willing to listen. The truth be told you all pissed me off. What could you know!!! 

She said she wanted to get here as soon as possible. Heck I wanted her as soon as possible too. So she went to a travel agent and got a valid itinerary and she showed it to me. I checked the flights YES, all good info. See none of those guys know what they're talking about! I asked what the tickets cost and she told me. Shes has still to this point never not one time ever asked me for money. The next day I'm standing at Western Union and you all know the rest of the story.

This is a fairly precise recount of the major points of how this all went down. What did I miss? I know I should have listened to all of you now, but this setup was pretty amazing. She, maybe he, but I almost doubt that now, took all the time in the world to let me walk into the trap. This wasn't your typical scam. I don't care what anyone says about fat Uri, to me this was totally different. This was more of a hunter and the hunted. This was a stalk and very carefully crafted and executed plan. She was always able to recount anything that I had told her, even weeks later she would remember and be able to almost quote what I had told her. It wasn't as if she was nodding and agreeing with everything I said, she heard it, she stored it, and was able to recall it with amazing clarity.

Pick it apart. I'll add details as you ask for them. Lets not let anyone else get taken by this guy/gal/ whatever...

Bill

[Jhengsman]

Any advice on how to avoid this? Lol


I'm planning on making my first trip this summer and I'd like to come home afterwards. 

The postal ID would be one thing to look for, however for us it would be like trying to determine a fake drivers license from another state.


if you are chatting on line then she almost certainly has a facebook account which you should be invited to friend before making any trips. Look for her "batchmates" and their years at school. Although they are now in the process of converting to a K-12 system and recent graduates may be older then those of the recent past.

[Crum1515]

Wow Robert, that was quite the long con!  I will definitely need to see what's under the hood before I take it off the lot.

[robert angel]

Wow Robert, that was quite the long con!  I will definitely need to see what's under the hood before I take it off the lot.

Things like that happen more than we think. Bill was just one of very few guys with the guts to tell the story with the intention of hopefully helping someone avoid the misery. He's happily married to a beautiful Filipina who's a former school teacher--we had dinner with them last month for their two year wedding anniversary and they are a great match.

Even Filipinos sometimes say the prettiest women there aren't actually women--they're surgically altered ladyboys. And it takes a lot of money to get that surgery.

[Crum1515]

Yeah, I am always weary of the "lady boy" factor.

[benjio]

Sounds like you got lucky. Remember that convincing false IDs are common just about everywhere. Sounds like you have a conscience. Underage girls even use fake IDs there to get guys to have sex, then the
'authorities' come storming in. If they're lucky, they get off paying thousands of dollars in fines, the money sometimes shared with the girl and her cohorts.  If they're extremely unlucky, the guys rot in Philippine jails so awful that most rats would shun them.

Very common scam here in Brazil as well, and the cops are always in on it. The problem is some of these 16 year old Brasileiras could easily pass for 20. Some have even already had boob jobs. When a guy has had a few drinks and she's flirting, they never give it a second thought. Best way to avoid these traps is going to places where there's an age limit to get in if you find yourself in Latin America. In Asia I wouldn't know. You most definitely dodged a bullet though. Asian girls look young to me already. I can't imagine red flags not shooting up if I were looking at a 16 year old Filipina girl on the other side of my computer screen. Not to mention the maturity level question. Did you not see any recent pictures of her before you all started talking?

[Crum1515]

Very common scam here in Brazil as well, and the cops are always in on it. The problem is some of these 16 year old Brasileiras could easily pass for 20. Some have even already had boob jobs. When a guy has had a few drinks and she's flirting, they never give it a second thought. Best way to avoid these traps is going to places where there's an age limit to get in if you find yourself in Latin America. In Asia I wouldn't know. You most definitely dodged a bullet though. Asian girls look young to me already. I can't imagine red flags not shooting up if I were looking at a 16 year old Filipina girl on the other side of my computer screen. Not to mention the maturity level question. Did you not see any recent pictures of her before you all started talking?

I had, and it there was nothing glaringly obvious as her age seemed to mimic the hundreds of other photos I was sifting through.  But alas, all I can do is be vigilant.  I think the fact that she came clean and I didn't oust her or catch her is that I expressed that I wasn't looking for something immediately sexual or anything like that.  She likely saw me as a waste of time and was probably stringing along several other "Johns".

 

[Ray]

I had, and it there was nothing glaringly obvious as her age seemed to mimic the hundreds of other photos I was sifting through.  But alas, all I can do is be vigilant.  I think the fact that she came clean and I didn't oust her or catch her is that I expressed that I wasn't looking for something immediately sexual or anything like that.  She likely saw me as a waste of time and was probably stringing along several other "Johns".

 

"Johns"??
 
First, if you didn't send her any money, then there was no scam.
 
Also, there may be several possible reasons why she told you she was underage. Perhaps she wasn't really underage, but she was married or had a steady boyfriend. Some of these girls are simply having fun chatting with foreigners but when you start planning a visit, they will scare you off with any nimber of excuses. Or maybe she was underage but just having fun on line. Either way, no scam here, unless you were asked for money and actually sent some.
 
Ray
 
 

[Bob_S]

Things like that happen more than we think. Bill was just one of very few guys with the guts to tell the story with the intention of hopefully helping someone avoid the misery.

Yeah, I always credit Bill for being brave and straight up honest to come back and give his story here.  It serves I think a very important cautionary tale for those delving into this process.


It just goes to show that even Asian men can be far more feminine than your typical Western woman.  And as this thread shows, you can't be too sure of their age.  My wife and I married in our late 30's, and at restaurants here she was still getting carded.  Not any more though, now that she's showing a few silver hairs.  And that teenage girl in Robert's profile, did you know she's really 70?!  Yeah, you just can't be sure of an Asian woman's true age.  They eat healthy and live forever.   

[Crum1515]

"Johns"??
 
First, if you didn't send her any money, then there was no scam.
 
Also, there may be several possible reasons why she told you she was underage. Perhaps she wasn't really underage, but she was married or had a steady boyfriend. Some of these girls are simply having fun chatting with foreigners but when you start planning a visit, they will scare you off with any nimber of excuses. Or maybe she was underage but just having fun on line. Either way, no scam here, unless you were asked for money and actually sent some.
 
Ray

Johns.  As in John Doe.  As in a male that is unknown, or a mark. It was my way of referencing the other guys she may or may not have been speaking to. 

I understand what a scam is, I didn't say I was scammed, nor did I allude to that.  Other people proposed conjecture that she was possibly running a scam. My original comment of "Lots of scammers and cam girls out there." was not related to her, just an overall observation of my experiences so far as a whole.  This post was an update of my search so far, and the sharing of one interesting interaction.

I know that there are other reasons that she could have come clean, I was simply postulating one of them. 

[Jhengsman]

Johns.  As in John Doe.  As in a male that is unknown, or a mark. It was my way of referencing the other guys she may or may not have been speaking to. 

 

The Filipino equivalent is Juan dela Cruz

[Crum1515]

The Filipino equivalent is Juan dela Cruz

Hahahaha... Ok, now I can start my morning correctly.  I laughed way too hard at that.