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[chris010]

Hiyas,

Just wanted to say first off thank you so much for all the good information I have looked over and read the past few months.  I have differently gotten alot of good insight and information.  Now just to give some background on myself.

I just turned 40 and I am currently getting out of a 10 year marriage.  Were in the final stages and we have both pretty much moved on with our lives.  I am hoping to find a women who I can have children with and raise a family with.  My concern is basically feeling that I may not find the right fit so to speak.  I have looked at many sites with AW and honestly cannot believe how many of the women look and how many of there profiles seem to all say the same thing--IE honesty, faithfullness, respect.  Are these values lacking in Asain men or have I really been out of the game that long?  Also a chief concern of mine is financial.  To be honest I work for the State of Virginia and we do not exactally make tons of cash.  I work in the corrections field and I am hoping to find find a women that just wants to be treated right and someone I can both love and not feel like I am constantly being compared or analyzed with her friends husbands.

Well I am sure I will think of more.  I have registered on FH and CB are there any other additional good sites?



Thank You for your time


Chris

[Jeff S]

Hi Chris and welcome. I'm sure plenty of guys will address your concerns.

No, honesty faithfulness and respect values aren't lacking in Asian men. Some have it, some don't, just like American men. The problem there is that with little or no divorce, depending on the country, lots of women end up having to endure their entire lives with men that may not have those values. Word gets out, so younger women are much more concerned with finding those values than AW do, who are busy looking for exciting bad boys. It's OK when they tire of them though because it's so easy to get a divorce. I recently reconnected with my very first girlfriend from jr high and high school on Facebook. She just had her FIFTH divorce finalized and is on the prowl again. Yikes! Not the case in Asia - they are far more interested in doing it right the first time, than having a fairytale romance.

Plenty of poorer guys than you have found what you seek in Asia, so don't let that be an issue.

[fathertime]

My concern is basically feeling that I may not find the right fit so to speak.  I have looked at many sites with AW and honestly cannot believe how many of the women look and how many of there profiles seem to all say the same thing--IE honesty, faithfullness, respect.  Are these values lacking in Asain men or have I really been out of the game that long?  Also a chief concern of mine is financial.  To be honest I work for the State of Virginia and we do not exactally make tons of cash.  I work in the corrections field and I am hoping to find find a women that just wants to be treated right and someone I can both love and not feel like I am constantly being compared or analyzed with her friends husbands.

Don't worry about the money part of the equation. If you are working and making a normal wage, that is plenty for many women.
Regarding the standard basic traits that an overseas woman is looking for.  As hard as it might be to believe, it is often true.  I'm speaking from the perspective of a man married to a Colombian woman, but I imagine it is the same in Asia.  IF you are a good man and haven't let yourself go TOO much, then you are in the game and have potential to find a good (and VERY attractive) wife.

Good luck!

Fathertime!

[chris010]

IF you are a good man and haven't let yourself go TOO much

No, Honestly last 18 months I have worked out 4 days a week and lost close to 50 pounds, been so stressed that the gym has helped me to address alot of my stress concerns.

As for the money part honestly I had to ask being most American women expect you to make 60 plus a year and own a home re guardless of if you just got out of a bad marriage.

[fathertime]

As for the money part honestly I had to ask being most American women expect you to make 60 plus a year and own a home re guardless of if you just got out of a bad marriage.

Nowadays owning a house that you are a debt slave to is far worse then renting for far less money and having a more free and easy lifestyle.  I doubt it is much of an issue to most women. Perhaps slightly more Asian women compared to Latina women, might care about owning the house. 

Fathertime!

[Bob_S]

As for the money part honestly I had to ask being most American women expect you to make 60 plus a year and own a home [regardless] of if you just got out of a bad marriage.

Hello, and welcome.
About the money issue, first off, the cost of an international courtship is not cheap.  Even if you find a sweetie who doesn't care if you're unemployed and living in a box, you'll still need money to make and sustain contact, travel, travel, and bring her over eventually.  To that end, it helps if you have at least a few grand in the bank and can afford to set aside at least $100-200 per week from every paycheck for at least a year to fund this effort.  If you are currently loaded with debts from alimony, child support, and expensive hobbies, this path may not be for you.  It requires a focused dedication.

Secondly, you're probably not going to encounter too many sweeties who don't care if you're unemployed and living in a box.  A fundamental truth of life is that women marry up.  But women are all individuals, and for each one, up can mean something different.  For some, up can mean economic, for sure, but for others, up can mean emotional or spiritual.  So when you start this process, you need to look at yourself as assess, what do you have to bring to the relationship?  In what way are you up for another woman?

The nice thing is, when searching abroad for your better half, you are the dream of some woman.  If you are a lying, cheating, abusive, alcoholic bastard but with lots of bucks, sure, you can find scores of women willing to put up with you for the step up in lifestyle (for a few years anyway).  But if you are an average guy with an average income who just wants to be faithful, attentive, and dutiful to your lady, then you will also find plenty of women who will be interested in you.

Dive on in.  The waters are warm.  Just watch out for the sharks.

[jm21-2]

Owning a house is a pretty big deal for most Chinese girls but don't know about Filipinas. Not necessarily a deal breaker but they are fascinated with owning real estate. Huge housing bubbles are extremely common in most Asian countries due to so many people investing in real estate. Taiwan had a bubble burst not too long ago and Taipei is already heading down that road again despite real estate values dropping in the rest of the country.

[z_k_g]

I have registered on FH and CB are there any other additional good sites?

Chris, welcome and good luck!

I would try www.dateinasia.com its free and women from all over asia, mostly from the Philippines.

Zulu

[chris010]

Maybe I need to rephrase what I meant,   I make a good living over 40k but not 60k a year.  As for the home I currently own a townhome since after my divorce I let me x have the house and i do have money in the bank I would not call myself poor but I am differently not set up either.  I am just wanting someone that wants to be treated fairly, someone that I can depend on and not have to worry with the constant "keeping up with the Jones", and overall raise a family with decent value with a focus on family and not on "what we got".  Hopefully I clarified it better


Chris

[Dave H]

Hi Chris,

Welcome to P-L! I don't really see any problems with your situation in the Philippines,  including financial. You would be considered quite well off here. A millionaire in the Philippines is someone who makes around $20,000 (about Php 1,000,000 - Philippine Pisos). You do that 2 times over.

Dave