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1
Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by robert angel on Yesterday at 06:31:17 PM »
Thanks guys. Seems we don't comment much beyond the occasional "spot on!" when somebody makes a really good post and pretty much nothing, not even taking a second to 'quote post' and adding 'LOL' occurs when one of us tells a particularily funny story.

But obviously people read our stuff--this thread alone has had over 6000 'hits.' It IS crazy, LOL....

MY stuff IS way too long and rambles on and off topic, I realize.

But it's all true. Boy, I wish Ida just grabbed those five hundred dollar bills when my wife showed me and she WAS ready to---after I said/asked, "it's OK, but how much did you go over this time?"

Maybe I sound cheap, but like I said, when that Benjiman hit the church basket and kept moving across,  I wasn't gonna jump up, raising a ruckus and say "Uh, Father Gabe--- hold the homily!"---climb over parishioners all down the pew, and pull that $100 bill out and maybe stick a 10 or 20 in!

Heck, we like to date, eat out Friday nights and again if we go to church, eat out after. But when out, we order water with lemon to drink! And we catch daytime movie matinees on weekends....
2
Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by Wildstubby on Yesterday at 05:21:02 PM »
I liked it also Rob!
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Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by Elexpatriado on Yesterday at 05:15:28 PM »
Great story Rob. Most gringos I know married to Colombianas are like me. 40 something, work out ,  argue with our wives over money  and have plenty of make up sex lol

I hate the drama..it really drains you
4
Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by mambocowboy on Yesterday at 01:37:50 PM »
I had an Uncle married to a Puerto Rican woman. Actually three Uncles married PR women. She treated me like a prince. I stayed at their house a lot of weekends and if I had a date, she'd always give me money to take a girl to movie, maybe even for food after. Told me in a coy way to to "remember the umbrella"--which eventually, I realized meant bring and use a condom.

My Uncle was a Golden Gloves Bronx, NY boxing champion and my Aunt was a stunning beauty. They were both physically very 'beautiful' people, and with kind, generous hearts. Typically people that are that attractive and materially well off aren't like them.

They were very religious, but very sensuous, They had impeccable manners, but at times, could swear like sailors, in both Spanish and English. I am sure they had sex that was hot enough to cause the wall paper to peel off the walls.

"Kisses and Hand Grenades" is how they described their marriage.

But he was a long distance trucker and while he made real good money, it was sometimes not as fast as my Aunt could spend it. I remember one time my Uncle made, I guess it was a ten day run, coast to coast. He came back and my Aunt 'surprised' him with a big, in ground pool, diving board, tiled concrete all around the pool, tiki like decoration, real 'PR Style' it was really nice. Trellis over the patio, with fake leaves and Christmas lights to provide shade, a table and seats for the endless Spanish recipes she'd bring out between swims. Man,  I loved that pool. I could bring friends over and they were treated well too, blown away by the experience, the Spanish culture and hospitality.

But money was one of the bigger things they fought about and my Aunt was super impulsive in her spending and other habits. Loved to shop, especially for clothes and she looked great in whatever she bought.  And she always got something for someone else in the family too.

But I'm pretty sure after the fights over her compulsive spending ensued, after the plates were done flying and the broken pieces cleaned up, that their 'make up sex' was incredible.

My wife's pretty good about the long term waiting, although she's changed a bit. She waited thirteen years for a new car (and her first 'learner' car was already very used when I bought it) but lately, she's on me a bit about 'when' am I going to buy our tickets to Europe for next year.

Oh, and while I was delighted that she came back from her vacation to her country and other places last summer with $500 left from the allowance I gave her, I was less than delighted, in fact I was 'speechless,' -- when the next Sunday in church, to thank God for the safe trip and our blessings, she put a HUNDRED dollar bill in the collection basket. I'd gotten to the point where I didn't and still try to not look, but I noticed that time. I mean, like she did it. What was I gonna do after that? Climb over people and yank it out?

I just hope it went to feed people who really need it. Lord knows she's a soft touch already for street people with signs saying they're hungry. She always is out of one dollar bills after we go to town, from gIving them away to those apparently to her, 'less fortunate'. If I say "NO" as we're going into eat somewhere, she orders a meal AND a drink, 'to go'-- to be given to the person outside begging.
Great story Rob. Most gringos I know married to Colombianas are like me. 40 something, work out ,  argue with our wives over money  and have plenty of make up sex lol
5
Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by robert angel on Yesterday at 09:31:18 AM »
#2 is so freaking accurate but hard to truly understand until you live with a Colombiana. My wife is the most spontaneous woman I have ever met. She is also incredibly impulsive,  easily influenced, and has great difficulty saving money...I have met numerous Barranquilleras married to gringos and they are all like this. If you are married to a Barranquillera you will have good sex  , fight over money, and have great makeup sex...

I had an Uncle married to a Puerto Rican woman. Actually three Uncles married PR women. She treated me like a prince. I stayed at their house a lot of weekends and if I had a date, she'd always give me money to take a girl to movie, maybe even for food after. Told me in a coy way to to "remember the umbrella"--which eventually, I realized meant bring and use a condom.

My Uncle was a Golden Gloves Bronx, NY boxing champion and my Aunt was a stunning beauty. They were both physically very 'beautiful' people, and with kind, generous hearts. Typically people that are that attractive and materially well off aren't like them.

They were very religious, but very sensuous, They had impeccable manners, but at times, could swear like sailors, in both Spanish and English. I am sure they had sex that was hot enough to cause the wall paper to peel off the walls.

"Kisses and Hand Grenades" is how they described their marriage.

But he was a long distance trucker and while he made real good money, it was sometimes not as fast as my Aunt could spend it. I remember one time my Uncle made, I guess it was a ten day run, coast to coast. He came back and my Aunt 'surprised' him with a big, in ground pool, diving board, tiled concrete all around the pool, tiki like decoration, real 'PR Style' it was really nice. Trellis over the patio, with fake leaves and Christmas lights to provide shade, a table and seats for the endless Spanish recipes she'd bring out between swims. Man,  I loved that pool. I could bring friends over and they were treated well too, blown away by the experience, the Spanish culture and hospitality.

But money was one of the bigger things they fought about and my Aunt was super impulsive in her spending and other habits. Loved to shop, especially for clothes and she looked great in whatever she bought.  And she always got something for someone else in the family too.

But I'm pretty sure after the fights over her compulsive spending ensued, after the plates were done flying and the broken pieces cleaned up, that their 'make up sex' was incredible.

My wife's pretty good about the long term waiting, although she's changed a bit. She waited thirteen years for a new car (and her first 'learner' car was already very used when I bought it) but lately, she's on me a bit about 'when' am I going to buy our tickets to Europe for next year.

Oh, and while I was delighted that she came back from her vacation to her country and other places last summer with $500 left from the allowance I gave her, I was less than delighted, in fact I was 'speechless,' -- when the next Sunday in church, to thank God for the safe trip and our blessings, she put a HUNDRED dollar bill in the collection basket. I'd gotten to the point where I didn't and still try to not look, but I noticed that time. I mean, like she did it. What was I gonna do after that? Climb over people and yank it out?

I just hope it went to feed people who really need it. Lord knows she's a soft touch already for street people with signs saying they're hungry. She always is out of one dollar bills after we go to town, from gIving them away to those apparently to her, 'less fortunate'. If I say "NO" as we're going into eat somewhere, she orders a meal AND a drink, 'to go'-- to be given to the person outside begging.
6
Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by mambocowboy on December 11, 2018, 07:46:14 PM »
Including the gentlemen on this site, if Fathertime is still with his wife, I know 9 guys with marriages to Costeñas that have stood the test of time. I know dozens that brought women here from the Coast of Colombia and they were done within 2 years. One guy that owned an IT Company and his wife was embezzling money from him for months. A couple that left their husbands for their personal trainers (Always, always, ALWAYS make your wife get a straight, female personal trainer or refuse to pay for it!!). Another that let a friend convince her she could do a lot better than the guy that brought her here because she was very attractive. Ended up getting deported. A lot of them that press false domestic violence charges against their husbands so they didn’t have to get deported. The list goes on and on.

The combination of three characterics makes marriages to Costeñas much less likely to succeed when you bring them to the states:

1. If they are exceptionally attractive they will very quickly realize what a higher commodity they are here. A 7 in Barranquilla can very easily be a 10 in Dallas. You will inevitably have to compete with younger, better looking men with more money and you can’t be around her all the time. She will be pursued by other men. This comes down to a question of how much she really loves you.

2. They tend to live for the moment and make split second decisions without thinking about the circumstances. This kind of links in with the 1st point, because there could be a guy promising her the world that just wants to get her in bed. Then she leaves you for him, he gets what he wants and ditches her. She just destroyed a marriage for instant gratification. And she’ll try to come crawling back but what self-respecting man would forgive her? The “living for the moment” approach can also cause huge issues with finances. You’re trying to build a nest egg for retirement and all they see is a big number in an account that you both could be spending up. They have very little sense or patience for financial planning and the future.

3. The worst thing is the American Culture is not one that nutures the idea of devoted, lifelong marriages. There are several billion dollar industries that thrive on the fact that women have absolutely no problem leaving their husbands if they aren’t satified with him. In this #METOO age men are immediately viewed as the bad guy when a marriage doesn’t work and usually we have to pay dearly for our “transgressions.”
#2 is so freaking accurate but hard to truly understand until you live with a Colombiana. My wife is the most spontaneous woman I have ever met. She is also incredibly impulsive,  easily influenced, and has great difficulty saving money...I have met numerous Barranquilleras married to gringos and they are all like this. If you are married to a Barranquillera you will have good sex  , fight over money, and have great makeup sex...
7
Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by robert angel on December 11, 2018, 06:08:40 PM »

 Me, I could of had a late 20~early 30 something but I preferred to have someone with a bit more of a maturity level. Hence I found a woman who is 45 and is perfect for what I want and need in a companion. She has 2 kids and yeah, I didn't count on being 'daddy' again at this stage in my life, but I am ok with it! The boy wants to join the military as soon as he gets here. So, to the OP that initiated the original post, you got both sides. Look but don't leap! If you think it is good, test the waters and let it go from there. But like any other relationship you might have, even here in the US, don't turn your back or a blind eye to what is going on around you!

While it goes against prevailing advice here, at one time I considered marrying a woman from the Philippines who already had a son. Ultimately it was issues with the woman, such as dramas and a sudden and then an increasing number of 'emergencies', which always required my cash to resolve, that ruined it. Add in her ever present jealousy (took a while to see that clearly) and I knew it wasn't gonna get better.

But her kid had nothing to do with me quitting on her. In fact if anything, it made it harder.

Sure, it opens up some risk factors, but then and now, I feel that with the RIGHT woman and situation, a Father walking into the role of
Dad and husband can inspire great, long-lasting gratitude and loyalty from the woman. It can be a plus or a negative.

Yes, in Latin America a boy, especially a young boy and an immature Mother can lead to "Little Prince Syndrome" -- where the new Stepdad will forever be 'second banana' to the child, sometimes to his face or worse yet behind it, but each situation needs to be evaluated on its own merits.

I have had an extraordinary life and it obviously started early, when I was to put it mildly, an extreme juvenile delinquent. I even pretty much carried that tack in life into my thirties. I'm still a tough act to have as a husband. Self destructive. The legal statute of limitations on most of the things I did has probably expired, but it'd be long ass post for me to recount even half the crap I did. Even sending me out of the country, to a now closed boarding school, famous for taking on the hardest cases, one that claimed "We Never kick any boys out" even they couldn't stop me and  Lord knows they beat the bejesus out of me trying. Took me a lot of effort and a series of international crimes, but in less than a year, I was out!

While for close to 35 years I had work that involved helping people from age three to 107 years old, I don't think I'll ever be able to adequately give back the amount of love, goodness and patience, never mind extraordinary luck, that I have gotten from others and in life overall.

But like the Shriners say: "No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child." And although my son's are now 22 and 27 years old, they'll always be my 'children.' And they, as well as kids who aren't even of my own flesh and blood, will always have my heart.
8
Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by Wildstubby on December 11, 2018, 03:03:57 PM »
benjio said:
Quote
3. The worst thing is the American Culture is not one that nutures the idea of devoted, lifelong marriages. There are several billion dollar industries that thrive on the fact that women have absolutely no problem leaving their husbands if they aren’t satified with him. In this #METOO age men are immediately viewed as the bad guy when a marriage doesn’t work and usually we have to pay dearly for our “transgressions.”
Alimony is when 2 people make a mistake and one person pays for it. "When she said 'I do', I should've asked, 'With whom?", (Rodney Dangerfield). Ok, there's the humor. Now for the medicine: When my divorce came around, my lawyer said it was going to be 45-55% split with me on the 45% end. When the beans were counted, that is pretty much how it came out. This was a red-headed American woman! So there's no guarantees because of that X-gene if you will win or lose. But it is what you put into it as to what you will get out of it. And that goes with premarital romance also. Me, I could of had a late 20~early 30 something but I preferred to have someone with a bit more of a maturity level. Hence I found a woman who is 45 and is perfect for what I want and need in a companion. She has 2 kids and yeah, I didn't count on being 'daddy' again at this stage in my life, but I am ok with it! The boy wants to join the military as soon as he gets here. So, to the OP that initiated the original post, you got both sides. Look but don't leap! If you think it is good, test the waters and let it go from there. But like any other relationship you might have, even here in the US, don't turn your back or a blind eye to what is going on around you!
9
Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by robert angel on December 11, 2018, 02:00:09 PM »
Including the gentlemen on this site, if Fathertime is still with his wife, I know 9 guys with marriages to Costeñas that have stood the test of time. I know dozens that brought women here from the Coast of Colombia and they were done within 2 years. One guy that owned an IT Company and his wife was embezzling money from him for months. A couple that left their husbands for their personal trainers (Always, always, ALWAYS make your wife get a straight, female personal trainer or refuse to pay for it!!). Another that let a friend convince her she could do a lot better than the guy that brought her here because she was very attractive. Ended up getting deported. A lot of them that press false domestic violence charges against their husbands so they didn’t have to get deported. The list goes on and on.

The combination of three characterics makes marriages to Costeñas much less likely to succeed when you bring them to the states:

1. If they are exceptionally attractive they will very quickly realize what a higher commodity they are here. A 7 in Barranquilla can very easily be a 10 in Dallas. You will inevitably have to compete with younger, better looking men with more money and you can’t be around her all the time. She will be pursued by other men. This comes down to a question of how much she really loves you.

2. They tend to live for the moment and make split second decisions without thinking about the circumstances. This kind of links in with the 1st point, because there could be a guy promising her the world that just wants to get her in bed. Then she leaves you for him, he gets what he wants and ditches her. She just destroyed a marriage for instant gratification. And she’ll try to come crawling back but what self-respecting man would forgive her? The “living for the moment” approach can also cause huge issues with finances. You’re trying to build a nest egg for retirement and all they see is a big number in an account that you both could be spending up. They have very little sense or patience for financial planning and the future.

3. The worst thing is the American Culture is not one that nutures the idea of devoted, lifelong marriages. There are several billion dollar industries that thrive on the fact that women have absolutely no problem leaving their husbands if they aren’t satified with him. In this #METOO age men are immediately viewed as the bad guy when a marriage doesn’t work and usually we have to pay dearly for our “transgressions.”

So much of this has been said countless times, albeit worded differently here and there, but it does sound like a broken record and at that, one that falls on pretty much deaf ears.

Guys are just, especially at first, blinded to not just the sad realities, but to the even sadder possibilities likely down n the road they're traveling.

I dare say most of the above pertains to women in and outside of the USA, but obviously the pit falls of bringing a bride to the USA from abroad, pertain to that category of women. Once any woman, from here or there, gets married and resides in the USA, the playing board and the rules of the game, are the same.

I had to learn the hard way, even though my best friend then (and he still is now and he thinks my current wife is GREAT) not only refused to be my 'Best Man' at my first wedding, but he even refused to be in the wedding party PERIOD. That's because he saw and warned me that he didn't feel she was 'right' for me. HE saw the flags. I didn't listen. And again, he told me, point blank......

Maybe some of the readers, members, 'lurkers' here--whatever, DO gain useful insights on this site, but I think that the vast majority will be blinded by beautiful lady's wiles and charms, that they will ignore potential red flags described to them here, and ignore them increasingly in proportion to just how hot the woman is.

In other words, they will tolerate sh!t from a babe they view as a 9 or 10, sh!t they wouldn't go near, were she a relative 7 instead.

It's as if our cocks are like the  'divining rods' of olden days. Quackery yes, but instead of us expecting them to miraculously find water, or mineral wealth, we let our brains be foolishly persuaded, blinded by our dicks and eyes, abandoning sound knowledge, brains disengaged, oblivious to what was previously told us.

I suppose we get what we deserve most of the time, as the pros and cons of the different scenarios here have been set forth countless times.

I think most of the regulars here have been losers at this game at least once, many of us actually more than once, but if anybody is really learning as we go, it's us, rather than vast majority of newbies.

This is a site where the train wreck stories run on forever, becoming favorite, ongoing topics, but where any attempt at humor or anecdotes, outside of largely negative takes on women and the pursuit of them, are all but ignored.

This place sorely lacks a sense of variety and  humor. If anybody IS laughing, I don't think anyone's hearing it. Meanwhile, our 'advice' doesn't seem to do much good.

Hard to quantify the success -- failure rate of relationships discussed and consumated here, because 99% of the time, we never hear back. That generally means the story is not good.

No wonder this place is running on fumes---> "Is this crazy??"
10
Latin -> General discussion / Re: Is this crazy?
« Last post by Elexpatriado on December 11, 2018, 12:17:56 PM »

You don't believe everything you hear...do you......getting 360 million pesos into Colombia is a lot of work and a time consuming process. Then he would have had to buy the house in just her name before they got married for him to not get half the house.


At some point you have to do a reality check when you hear the scary stories they tell around the camp fire.

I agree..

In retrospect, the guy who told me the story is a real good friend ..but also a real big BSer..
But a year is quite a Long period where stuff like this could actually  happen..could have bought it in his name and just given it to her..if he was loaded and no skin off his back

Problem is stories like this ..whether true or not..emboldens the chicas and  them that "entitled" attitude.
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